Dying Wish: A Novel of the Sentinel Wars (39 page)

He sucked in a sharp breath and tightened his control on his monster in the nick of time. It hurled itself against the bars, rattling Iain down to the soles of his feet. It wanted her. It wanted to hold her down and fuck her until the rage was gone. Which would never happen.

One single look, and the beast thought she should be his.

Iain stood there, gritting his teeth in an effort to maintain control. He closed his eyes, hoping that not looking at her would help.

It didn’t. The monster simply formed its own image, remembering the way she looked naked and sprawled across the bed, her skin flushed, her lips red and swollen.

Her hands slid under his shirt, flexing against his bare skin.

Iain let out a low, animal sound that was part torment, part pleasure. Feeling her hands on him, feeling her touch his lifemark, was almost more than he could stand. He wanted her, too, but he was having trouble fighting both his own desires as well as the beast’s.

Her fingernails bit into his skin, and he heard her chair scrape over the vinyl floor. The hem of his shirt dragged along his ribs, and her soft mouth pressed a kiss over his heart.

His abs clenched, and his knuckles popped under the strain of his tightened fists. He wanted to touch her so bad, to slide his fingers into her hair and hold her head while she kissed him.

He didn’t dare move. Not his hands, not his mouth. If he gave even an inch, his control would snap and she’d end up bent over the kitchen table with her jeans around her ankles and his cock shoved as deep in her sweet pussy as it could go.

Another sound rose from his chest—a wordless plea for mercy—but if she understood it, she didn’t listen. Instead, her tongue flicked out across his nipple, sending a string of chain lightning down his spine. His cock throbbed against his fly and sweat popped out along his hairline.

Her teeth closed gently on his nipple, and then she eased the erotic sting with her tongue.

Iain was fighting a battle on two fronts—fighting his own desires, as well as those of the beast. And he was losing on both. He needed to retreat, to get as far away from her as he could.

He shifted his weight to take a step back, but it was too late.

“Kiss me,” she whispered, threading her fingers through his hair and pulling his head down to hers.

He tried to tell her how close she was to facing his monster, but his mouth wouldn’t work. He scrambled for their link, letting her glimpse what he was protecting
her from. The violent need and lust hovering just inside of him. It shamed him to let her see that part of himself, but his feelings here were not important. Jackie’s were.

Her body shook, and her grip on his head tightened. He forced his eyes to open, sure he’d see disgust lining her face. Instead, her pupils had grown huge with desire. A fragile whimper passed her lips, and it was filled with the sound of want, not fear.

Lust pulsed between them, tinted with feminine need. Her lust, not his. She’d seen the beast and it hadn’t scared her away.

“You don’t want that,” he told her. “You can’t want that.”

“I want you. All of you, even the darker parts.”

She didn’t know what she was saying. There was no way she could truly understand what she would face.

He opened his mouth to order her to run away, but before the words could come out, her mouth was on his, hot and sweet and demanding. Her tongue plunged inside, and she fed him a soft groan of satisfaction.

Desire radiated out from her, filling their link with her need. He could feel her skin warm and the flesh between her thighs grow damp and swollen. There was an emptiness there that she wanted him to fill, a deep ache of longing that only he could drive away.

Iain was unable to resist her need. He was powerless, unwilling to let her suffer, unable to hold back anything she wanted.

But he couldn’t let the monster free. Not this time. Not when it knew that he was planning to go to his death tonight. If the beast broke free, it would protect itself, and Iain might never be able to regain control. Whatever it took, whatever he had to do to control the monster, he’d do. For her. One last time.

Iain shifted his control, aiming every bit of effort toward keeping the monster caged. There was none left
for him, none left to keep him from giving in to his baser urges.

He kissed her back, slanting his mouth over hers, tasting her. Her fingernails bit into his scalp, lighting his nerve endings on fire. His cock swelled until he was sure he’d go insane with the need to shove inside her.

Her clothes had to go. He needed her naked.

Iain tried to unbutton her jeans, but his hands were shaking too hard. He couldn’t seem to get the damn button out of the hole.

Jackie swept his hands aside and did the job for him. She stripped out of her clothes in a heartbeat, her gaze fixed on his, smoldering with desire. Her eyes had darkened to a deep gunmetal gray, and a flush was already spreading down her throat onto her chest.

The luceria glowed against her skin, and for a split second, he thought the scars lining her neck had faded. Not that it mattered. Scars or not, she was the most fucking beautiful woman he’d ever touched.

Her body quivered in anticipation as she stood there, her perfect breasts rising and falling with each rapid breath. Iain fumbled to rip his boots off, unwilling to look away from her.

The curve of her waist and flare of her hips drove him mad with the need to touch. The slim length of her legs reminded him of just how good they’d felt wrapped around his hips, and her rosy lips brought back every intoxicating second of his cock sliding in and out of her mouth.

As soon as he was free of his clothes, he reached for her. She crashed into his arms, her mouth landing on his in a kiss that stole his breath. The heat of her bare skin rubbing against his cock made the monster howl in frustration. It wanted to fill her, to take what it wanted without care for her pleasure.

Like hell Iain was going to let that happen.

He wrapped her up in his arms and lifted her onto the nearby counter, so he could reach her mouth easier. She hooked her ankles around his thighs and jerked him close, melding their bodies together from groin to chest.

Her tight nipples poked his chest. The slick folds of her pussy slid along his cock, making it pulse and throb for deeper contact. He needed to be inside her so bad he wasn’t sure he’d survive the wait.

“No waiting,” she breathed against his mouth.

Her fingers wrapped around his cock, and she lifted her body up, aligning them. Wetness welled from his erection, making the contact even slicker. As wide as he was, she was ready for him and he inched in nice and easy, driving a gasp from her lungs.

He was bathed in her heat, surrounded by her scent. Her feelings mingled with his, amplifying them.

The monster screamed for Iain to shove himself all the way in. To make her take it, make her like it.

If Iain didn’t start moving, he was going to lose the battle with his beast and set it free. So he moved. He pulled back and surged forward, burying another few inches of himself inside of her. The slick glide against his skin made his body tighten as he fought to stay in control.

“More,” she ordered, clawing at his scalp, wriggling her hips in an effort to lodge him deeper.

She wanted more. The beast wanted more. Iain certainly had it to give.

He lifted her from the counter with the goal of getting her to a nice, soft bed. He made it only three steps when she blasted him with an image of him fucking her against the wall.

His balls tightened, and he nearly came right there, feeling so much lust radiating out of her. She wanted this. She wanted this as much as he did, though he wasn’t sure how that was possible.

Iain shoved her back to the kitchen wall, propping her up right between the telephone and a framed landscape painting. His leg hit a kitchen chair, sending it flying into the table. Something crashed to the floor, but he didn’t give a fuck what it was.

Her breath came out in a rush, but he couldn’t tell if it was because he’d been too rough, or because the act had completely buried his cock inside her. All he knew was her eyes fluttered closed in satisfaction, and her head fell back, displaying her neck.

Iain lowered his mouth to kiss her, lifting her body to make her ride his cock. Soft sounds slipped from her mouth, and her fingers dug into his shoulders.

He kept moving, filling her up with every dragging thrust. Her pussy fluttered around him, and her breathing sped. Then it stopped as she held her breath.

Her legs tightened around his hips a split second before her inner muscles clenched around him and she let out a long, high cry of release.

Iain rode her through it, keeping up the pace that made her tremble around him. He soaked up her cries and held back his own orgasm through a sheer force of will.

The monster roared in fury, and rattled the bars to be set free so it could take over.

As the rush of her climax passed, her body went limp, her arms draping over his shoulders, her head resting against his.

He wasn’t done with her yet. He needed more from her—enough to fill the gaping void inside of him, enough to quiet the raging monster. There wasn’t much time left for him, and he wanted to spend every second he could making Jackie scream in pleasure.

A bed was too far away. The couch was much closer. He carried her to it, held her close, and eased her back. The angle of his penetration shifted, and she arched her back, letting out a breathy moan.

He could feel what she felt. Their link was wide open, and the cascading pleasure seeping into her cells, making her limp and boneless, was his as well. The slide of skin on skin, the slick heat of their joined bodies. The heavy pound of his heart and the faster cadence of hers. He saw himself through her eyes, his own body compelling in this new light. Superimposed on that was the sight of her, spread out beneath him, her skin flushed, her body quivering with growing need.

It hit Iain that this was what it was supposed to be like. This was what his life should have been—joined to someone so tightly that it became hard to distinguish where one of them stopped and the other began.

It would have been easy to mourn what he was going to miss out on, but he couldn’t stand to spend what time he had left grieving. He wanted to live. To love.

He couldn’t love her. He was incapable of such things, no matter how much he wished otherwise. There was no room for love in a dead soul, so all he could offer her now was purely physical.

It would have to be enough.

Iain lifted her hips and thrust hard, angling himself in a way that made lightning shoot from her clit to her womb. He could feel the sensation flowing through her, rising between them, as easily as he could feel the slick glide of her body as his cock surged deep.

Her breasts ached, so he fondled and kissed them, suckling her nipples hard, just the way she liked it. The peak stood out, wet and red from his efforts as he moved to lavish attention on her other breast. His own body coiled tight, his muscles clenching and releasing as he pushed them both higher.

She was right there with him, her hips moving in time with his, her fingernails biting into his ass as she demanded a harder, faster pace.

The monster grew stronger, louder. Iain wasn’t going to be able to keep it at bay for much longer. He didn’t
want to share this with the beast. Jackie was his. All his. No one else, nothing else, could have her.

It was time to make her come, time to let himself go and give in before it was too late.

Iain reached for her thoughts, needing to be as close to her as he could get. She liked it that he was nearly out of control. The idea that she could drive him to such abandon made her feel powerful and beautiful.

He wanted that for her. He wanted her to always be happy and know how precious she truly was.

He gathered up his desire, his need to make her happy, and put it on bright display, highlighted by his own ragged lust. She made a sweet noise, high and breathless. He recognized it from the last times he’d made her come. She was close, perched on the edge, trusting him to catch her as she fell.

That trust was Iain’s undoing. Even as deep inside his thoughts as she was, even with the brutal face of the beast on display, she still trusted him to stay in command and keep her safe.

He wouldn’t let her down, not in this, and not in seeing to her future.

Iain covered her parted lips with his and thrust his tongue into her mouth in time with the steady pace of his cock. She drank down his groan of pleasure, and held on tight as his orgasm slammed into him, rocking him to his core.

The first jet of semen made her body clench as she followed him into orgasm. Pleasure filled him, surrounded him, bursting from every pore, driving away every thought but the pulsing, radiant joy that wrung every drop of seed from his body.

Jackie trembled around him, holding him close and panting. A tremor shook her frame, and he lifted his head to make sure she was okay. Tears pooled in her eyes, but all he felt coming from her through the luceria was a gentle mix of happiness and satisfaction.

He couldn’t stand the sight of her tears, happy or not. He cradled her head to his chest and stroked her hair, hoping the tears would pass.

His muscles felt wrung out and loose, but he was filled with a boundless energy, as if he could fight for days without stopping. Even his monster was soothed to sleep.

As his breathing slowed and his skin cooled, he committed every detail of this moment to memory. The smell of her skin, the sound of her heart, the feel of her arms wrapped around him, and the taste of her lips on his. This was the moment he would take into combat with him. This was the image he’d cling to as death came.

This shimmering moment of peace would ease him from this life. It would comfort him and appease the beast so that he could do the right thing. The honorable thing.

Jackie would be free to find joy with another man—one who was capable of loving her the way she deserved. And that thought made him as happy as his dead soul would allow.