Each Time We Love (32 page)

STUNNED,
Savanna stared up at Adam's dark, unrelenting
features, hardly able to credit his words. Her lips tingled from the
force of his kiss and she was unbearably aware of the long, warm length
of him pressed closely against her, but there was no joy within her. It
would seem that Adam St. Clair was, unlike her father, she admitted
sadly, an honorable man. He suspected that she might be pregnant and so
felt compelled to offer marriage to a woman he might desire, and
Savanna didn't doubt that he did desire her—at least, at the moment—but
she was miserably certain that she aroused no deeper, finer emotions
within him. The question of her father aside, what sort of a marriage
would it be with him shackled to a woman far below him in wealth and
social standing, a woman who under normal circumstances would never
even have crossed his path? If there were love between them, they might
overcome the chasms that separated them, but with only his desire for
her body to bind them together, she could see nothing but unhappiness
ahead for either of them if she were foolish enough to marry him. And
then there was her father… would Adam or
any
of
his family ever be able to look upon her and not think of Davalos and
the horrible ordeal he had forced them to endure—and not hate her for
it? For the sake of a child, could she bear to marry Adam, knowing the
ugly circumstances that had brought them to this point; knowing that
nothing but lust bound them together; knowing that her father had done
grievous wrongs to his family? Surely, once his fascination for her
body had waned, and Savanna never doubted that it would, he would hate
her… and the child she might bear…

Savanna's heart clenched painfully. Adam's scorn and hatred
for her she could withstand, but what about his scorn for their child?
Hadn't she herself suffered because of Davalos's indifference? How much
worse would it be when the father actually hated the mother, and that
hatred included a child?

When she remained silent for so long, her eyes locked in his,
Adam grew impatient. Shaking her slightly, he demanded, "Well? Are you
going to marry me?"

Savanna took a deep breath and carefully extricated herself
from his arms. Not looking at him, she brushed a leaf from her worn
breeches and said softly, "No."

Adam stared at her incredulously, the unexpected ache in his
heart at her answer almost driving him to his knees. "Excuse me?" he
said in a dangerous tone of voice once he had gained command of
himself. "Are you telling me that you refuse? That you're not going to
marry me?"

Savanna nodded stiffly, unable to look at him for fear her
resolve might weaken.

A wave of impotent rage swept through Adam and, his hard blue
eyes boring into her, he wanted to curse, shake her senseless and kiss
her into acquiescence all at the same time. Jaw clenched, hands on
hips, he surveyed her with open dislike. "And would you mind," he
finally snarled, "telling me why in the hell not? You sure as the devil
aren't likely to get a better offer!"

Savanna's head snapped up at that and, suddenly just as angry
as he, she spat, "I don't have to give you a reason—but I could point
out that you haven't shown me any cause to want to spend the rest of my
life with you! You're an overbearing, arrogant swine! Why the hell
should
I want to marry you?"

The truth of her words hit him like a blow, and his hurt and
rage at her refusal ebbed slightly. God knew their courtship, if what
they'd shared could be called that, certainly had not been gentle! He'd
never asked a woman to marry him before in his life, had never
wanted
to marry anyone before now, and while he would admit that the
circumstances were not the best, he had been convinced that Savanna
would see that marriage was the only answer to their dilemma. That he
might have other reasons for wanting her as his wife than just to give
his child a name, he single-mindedly pushed aside. She had to be made
to see sense! The facts surrounding his own birth made him particularly
sensitive to the notion of a child being born out of wedlock, and he
was grimly determined that no child of his was going to suffer that
fate—not even if he had to drag the mother hog-tied and gagged to the
altar! Savanna
was
going to marry him! She just
didn't know it yet! And he was willing to pull every underhanded trick
he knew to make her realize it…

Catching her off guard, he jerked her into his embrace and his
lips unerringly found hers. He kissed her an endless time, all the
passion and pentup longing within him behind the seductive crush of his
mouth on hers. Ah, Jesus, he'd missed having her in his arms, he
admitted with angry bewilderment; missed the warmth of her soft body
against his; missed the intoxicating sweet taste of her on his tongue,
the soft, exciting sounds she made when he kissed her.

Savanna fought against the hungry desire that surged through
her as Adam's mouth worked its dark magic on her, but her attempt was
futile, and with a faint moan of defeat and despair she finally melted
against him, hating herself just as much as she was convinced she hated
him… His tongue moved with sensuous abandon within her mouth, making
her weak with longing, arousing sensations and emotions she didn't want
to feel but was powerless to control. To her shame, she pressed nearer,
her own tongue curling warmly about his, her breasts pushing wantonly
into his hard chest.

Helplessly entangled in the web of desire that bound them
together, they clung desperately to each other, for the moment all the
difficulties and hurts and misunderstandings that lay between them
forgotten. There was only this: the demanding hunger of each other's
kiss, the giddy sensation of their bodies crushed together as they
stood there locked in a passionate embrace.

They remained lost in each other's arms until the sound of
Bodene's voice in the distance brought Adam slowly back to the present.
Dazedly he lifted his plundering mouth from Savanna's but recovered
himself almost instantly to allow a crooked grin to slash across his
face, and he glanced down into her bemused features and drawled
mockingly, "I think we've just thoroughly demonstrated one of the
reasons why you should want to marry me."

Savanna had been drowning in the sweetness of his kiss, but
his words were like an icy douche, all the problems and obstacles
between them exploding through her, and before she had time to think,
her hand shot out and she gave him a ringing slap on one lean cheek.
Bosom heaving, she glared up at him.
"That,"
she
said frostily, "is not reason enough for me!"

Adam's face darkened and he took an angry step forward.
Grasping her arm, he shook her roughly and growled, "You know, I've
suffered about all the physical abuse from you that I'm going to—you've
hit me for the last time, sweetheart. Next time you lay a hand on me
that way… I'm going to beat the living hell out of you!"

"Try it!" she snarled back. "And I'll skewer your liver and
feed it to the gators!"

Hearing this last bit as he walked up to them, Bodene smiled
and murmured, "Ah, how sweet the lovebirds sing!"

Two pairs of furious eyes nailed him where he stood, and
almost in unison, with equal amounts of loathing obvious in their
tones, Savanna and Adam repeated scathingly,
"Lovebirds!"

Bodene pulled on his ear and, bending his head, looked
suitably chastened, but a smile lurked at the corners of his mouth as
he said with suspect meekness, "My mistake! I apologize." Glancing
quizzically at them, he added, "We're ready to break camp— you'd better
come back now, or you'll have Jason and Blood Drinker coming after you."

Throwing Adam a fulminating look, Savanna said tightly,
"Believe me, we can't break camp soon enough! There are
some
people I'll be glad never to see again!"

Adam took a deep breath and grabbed hold of her arm. "We
haven't finished our conversation yet," he said stubbornly. Never
taking his eyes off her stormy face, he added to Bodene, "Tell the
others we'll be there in just a moment. We have something to settle
between ourselves."

Seeing the grim line of Adam's jaw, Bodene decided that now
was not the time to argue with him. He shrugged his shoulders and
disappeared into the brash.

Equally furious with her cousin for deserting her so easily
and with Adam for his high-handedness,

Savanna glared at Adam and muttered, "I don't have anything to
say to you. Let me go!"

Gently he turned her to face him and said urgently, "Savanna,
whatever you may feel for me, there is still the matter of the
child—you can't want it to be born out of wedlock!"

Savanna bit her lip and averted her eyes from him. Mutinously
she said, "1 don't know if I'm pregnant. I might not be, so until I
know for certain, there is no question of marriage!"

"Look at me!" Adam said tightly, his grip on her arm
increasing. When her eyes were fastened angrily on his face, he asked
heavily, "If you do discover you are carrying my child, can I trust you
to tell me?"

Exhausted by the events that she had endured so recently, and
worn out from the turmoil within herself, she felt some of the fight go
out of her. But pride would not let her abandon the stance she had
taken, and she said tightly, "Adam, even if I am pregnant, it will not
change my answer. I will
not
marry you!" Her chin
lifted defiantly. "And you can't make me!"

A dangerous glint entered his sapphire-blue eyes and he added
silkily, "Well, sweetheart, we'll just see about that, won't we?"

Releasing her abruptly, he pushed her in the direction of the
camp. Uneasily aware of him walking behind her, Savanna quickly made
her way to where the others stood waiting. The speculative look that
Jason gave the two of them as they approached brought a wave of color
burning into her cheeks. She mumbled some sort of greeting and with
relief set about double-checking the gear on her horse.

A few minutes later they were all mounted, and there was a
brief, awkward moment before Bodene touched the rim of his hat and said
cordially, "Gentlemen, we'll bid you good-bye and Godspeed!"

Jason nodded and he and Blood Drinker turned their horses to
the north and, taking one of the pack-horses with them, began the
journey to Terre du Coeur. Only Adam remained with the cousins. He
smiled at Bodene and murmured, "When next I am in New Orleans, I plan
to visit that establishment of yours!"

Bodene grinned. "And lose a tidy sum at the tables, I trust?"

Adam shook his head, mockery brimming in his eyes. "I doubt
it—I'm reputed to be very lucky!"

Both men laughed and, the laughter dying out of his face, Adam
looked directly at Savanna. Huskily he said, "Any message you wish to
send to me will reach me at Belle Vista, near Natchez."

Savanna averted her face and said stiffly, "I cannot imagine
any
reason why I would have to send you a message." Not waiting for a
reply, she kicked her horse into motion and disappeared into the brush.

Bodene exchanged a look with Adam. "She's very proud—and
stubborn as the devil!" he said ruefully.

"I had noticed," Adam replied dryly. Fixing an intent gaze on
Bodene, he added, "If there should be any difficulties… will
you
let me know?"

Bodene nodded and then, tipping his hat and pulling their
packhorse after him, he quickly followed in Savanna's direction. For a
long time after Bodene had ridden away, Adam stared at the spot where
he had last seen Savanna, every instinct within him shouting for him to
follow after her and make her agree to marry him, but he knew that he
would be chasing a fool's errand. At the moment, her mind was
obstinately set against him, and he could only hope that time would
bring about a change in her attitude. Muttering about the contrariness
of women, one certain redheaded witch in particular, Adam swung his
horse around and urged it in the direction that Jason and Blood Drinker
had ridden.

It didn't take Bodene long to catch up with Savanna, and after
taking a look at the closed expression on her face, he concluded that
she was in no mood to talk—about anything! They rode in silence for
several hours, the only exchange of words having to do with the
direction they were going in or the terrain and the best way to get
around or through the various natural obstacles they came across.

It was well after noon when Bodene finally suggested that they
stop and give their horses a rest, as well as eat something themselves.
Savanna nodded and, quietly dismounting, wondered bleakly why, now that
she was finally away from Adam and on her way home, she should be so
miserable and unhappy.

Bodene quickly lit a small fire and boiled some coffee. Having
saved some of the cooked cornmeal mush from breakfast, he fashioned it
into a pair of patties and set them in a pan to bake near the fire.
Handing the finished product to Savanna a short while later, he grinned
at her and murmured, "You know, once we get back to Campo de Verde, I
don't think I'm ever going to eat anything with corn in it as long as I
live!"

Savanna smiled faintly and, nibbling at her patty, admitted
wryly, "I don't think I even want to
see
corn!
Not that there haven't been times recently that I haven't been grateful
to have it."

That Savanna had suffered during this wild odyssey was
obvious—there was a fine-drawn loveliness about her that hadn't been
apparent previously, but even in the worn and grubby youth's clothing,
she was undeniably a striking woman. She had set her hat aside for the
moment, and the sunlight struck fire in the red-gold braids worn on top
of her head and caressed her smooth, tawny skin, intensifying the
vividness of her coloring, Bodene studied her for several moments and
noticed that the tenseness about her mouth had finally disappeared. He
asked quietly, "Do you want to tell me what
really
happened between you and Adam St. Clair?"