Early Spring 01 Broken Flower (21 page)

Becoming a Lady
. She said it was all about manners and proper behavior and was just as important as, if not more important than, the other subjects.
She opened each book to show me where she had marked off the pages for me to begin reading. Each book, except the one called Becoming a Lady had a workbook to go along with it, which was something I had in school. She then showed me the pages in the workbook that I had to complete after I had done a section of reading in each book.
"I'm going to let you start on your own," she said. She looked at her watch. "You'll have enough time to do the math assignment and the English assignment before lunch. After lunch, you will do the rest and then we'll go over all the work together to set what you learned yourself and what I need to explain further."
I glanced at the window. It was practically a cloudless day and very warm, too.
"But I want to go swimming today.
Grandmother Emma said she had the pool started for Ian and me. She said we could go swimming and I want to call one of my friends to come over, Missy Littleton."
"We will discuss that after you've completed all your work," she said. But I can tell you that I frown upon any guests arriving on weekdays. You can begin now."
"I don't want to," I said. "I don't want to do schoolwork today. I want to go sWirilriling. It's not weekdays in the summer. Every day is like a weekend."
"Not to me and not to you any longer. Work." I couldn't help the tears.
She glared at me and then she looked at her watch. "I will return in an hour and a half. If you haven't completed the first two assignments by then, you won't have lunch."
She turned and walked out of the room, closing the door.
"I won't do it!" I screamed. My heart was pounding in anticipation of her returning, but she didn't. I listened and then I rose and peeked out the door to set her marching toward Ian's bedroom.
I watched her try the door and then knock hard, demanding he open the door. He didn't. I could see her arms down, extended her hands clenched into fists.
"You will regret this, young man," she warned, turned, and headed for the stairway.
I retreated quickly and returned to my desk, where
I
sat sulking, but I couldn't help but be curious about the schoolwork. Maybe Ian was right. Maybe I should get ahead.
I
started to read the math book and then look at the workbook. Some of it was easy, but some of it was confusing and I was impatient. I returned to sulking until that bored me, too. I got up and looked out the window.
Grandmother Emma's grounds workers were cutting grass and trimming bushes. The pool man was there cleaning. It was truly a beautiful day and I longed just to be outside to smell the flowers blooming, the grass being cut, and hear the birds. I even wished we were back at the lake and all that had happened was just a nightmare. I'd even risk meeting up with the black bear again.
Really bored now and frustrated. I went to the bed and just sprawled out. I closed my eyes and turned on my back and before I knew it. I fell asleep. A sharp slap across my left cheek woke me and I looked up at an enraged Miss Harper.
"How dare you? How dare you defy my instructions and ignore your assinments?"
I was too stunned to cry. No one ever slapped me like that, not Mama, not Daddy, and not Grandmother Emma. I touched my burning cheek and held my breath.
"Not only won't you go out today, you will have no lunch and will remain in this room now until all the work I assigned you is completed. And if you don't finish it by dinnertime, you'll miss dinner as well."
"No. I won't,"
I
said defiantly.
"Oh, yes, you will," she said with a cold smile, and held up the skeleton key to the bedroom door. "I know how to housebreak puppies. I'll return in three hours," she said.
She turned before I could get off the bed and she walked out, closing the door behind her. I heard her turn the key in the lock and then I heard her walk away.
I slipped off the bed and ran to the door, smashing it with my little fists and screaming at the top of my voice. 'Open the door! Let me out! Let me out! I want my mother!"
I waited, but heard only silence. My hands were red and hurt where I struck the door with them. I shuddered and sank to the floor, crying. I was sobbing so loudly. I didn't hear the tinkling sounds in the door lock when they first began, but when I heard them. I sucked in my tears and held my breath. After a few more moments, the lock snapped open. I rose and stood back quickly, terrified of what she would do next.
The door opened.
Ian was standing there with a screwdriver in his hands. And
I
was never so happy to see him.
"Why did she lock you in?" he asked me.
"Because I didn't do the schoolwork she wanted me to do. She said I wouldn't get any lunch until I did it and if I didn't, I might not get dinner either. I want to go outside. I want to go see Mama."
"Calm down, Jordan," he said, and stood there thinking. "You should have tried to do the work, but she shouldn't have locked you in here. It's dangerous. What if there had been a fire?"
I nodded, suddenly very frightened, too.
"IAN!" we heard her scream. "How dare you do such a thing? You have disobeyed your grandmother, too. You were told not to come here."
Ian turned slowly and looked at Miss Harper. He held his screwdriver pointed at her.
"You shouldn't have locked her in the room. If there had been a fire, she could have died," he said. "My grandmother will not like that. Our parents will be infuriated as well."
"You are truly an insubordinate young man. Your grandmother has placed you both in my hands for the time being and your parents can only be grateful for what I'm trying to do here."
Ian blew air through his lips and she stiffened, seeming to grow taller.
"Go to your room this instant. There will be no lunch for you either. Go on!" she said, pointing toward his room.
Ian looked at me and then at her and walked slowly down the hall. When he reached the stairway, he started down.
Miss Harper shook her head.
"I told you to go to your room!" she shouted, waited, but he didn't reappear. That boy is
incorrigible.' she said. "His misbehavior is much more serious than your grandmother assumed. Something very drastic has to be done immediately."
She looked at me. "Have you gone back to your desk and your work?"
I started to shake my head and stopped. I didn't want her to lock the door again.
"Yes," I said.
"Very well. I'll trust you this time. You can come down to lunch and then we'll work afterward together. If we make good progress, we'll go outside, too," she promised. "Come along."
I hesitated.
Somehow, being nice to her seemed like a terrible betrayal of Ian.
I had no idea just how right
I
was.

Grandmother Emma didn't return from the hospital until shortly before our dinner was to be served. As it turned out, the work Miss Harper had given me took most of the afternoon and by the time I was finished and she looked at it, it was too late to go swimming. She reviewed the workbooks with a red pencil and marked all my mistakes. I really did feel as if I were back in school.

"Tomorrow, we will begin with your errors," she said, "and we will get you to understand
everything and get everything right. Every two days I will give you a test on what you've learned and we'll decide if you will go ahead or go back. With this sort of concentrated effort. Jordan, have you on a fourthgrade level well before the end of the summer. You'll see. You'll be very happy with yourself...

I gazed out the window. The beautiful blue sky was now covered with a thick layer of dark clouds. We were going to have a thunderstorm. I had missed a wonderful day. I wondered if Ian had missed it. too. I hadn't heard him or seen him. He wasn't at lunch as I had expected either. I could see Miss Harper didn't know where he was. Afterward, I heard her ask Nancy, who told her Ian was like a ghost around here. She never knew when to expect him or where he was.

"That will come to an abrupt end," Miss Harper vowed.
I don't think Nancy cared one way or another, although when I saw Miss Harper talk to her. I noticed that Nancy seemed just as frightened of her as she was of Grandmother Emma.
We heard Grandmother Emma come up the stairs and down the hallway. She paused at my father's bedroom doorway and looked in on us.
"How are we doing. Millicent?" she asked.
Miss Harper glanced at me and then walked out, closing the door so
I
wouldn't hear them talk. I strained to listen. Their voices were quite muffled, but Grandmother Emma's was full of disappointment and anger.
"I'm sorry," I heard her say. "I'll see about him as soon as possible."
The door was opened again and Miss Harper told me to run my bath. "I'll pick out what you should wear to dinner," she said. "Go on. Get started."
"I want to see Grandmother Emma first," I said.
I think Miss Harper assumed I was going to complain about her, about how she had washed my mouth with soap and slapped my face and made me work on schoolwork all day. She smiled and without hesitation turned and called to Grandmother Emma.
"Emma, your granddaughter would like a word with you."
Grandmother Emma returned to my doorway. She had removed her light coat and had begun to unpin her hair. "What is it, Jordan? I have much to do before I get ready for dinner."
"How was Daddy?" I asked. "Is he coming home? Is he in a wheelchair already? Does he know he won't walk again?"
"It isn't polite to ask so many questions before you get the answer to one, Jordan," Miss Harper said, but in a much softer voice than she usually spoke to me.
"Your father has learned the full extent of his injuries and he is in a deep depression about it," Grandmother Emma began. "That will pass in time and that's when I will bring you to see him. As to his therapy, it will begin as soon as possible, but I'm afraid it will take most of the summer before I can have him brought back to the house and he becomes accustomed to his wheelchair.
"Before you ask," she added, "there is no change in your mother's condition. She could be like she is for weeks, months, even years. It's not unheard of for people with her sort of injuries to be in prolonged comas.
"As you can see, this is why it is so important for you and your brother to behave and listen obediently to Miss Harper. We have to make the best of this situation and misbehavior cannot be tolerated. No one has time for it. You can help your brother by advising him about all that and telling him to behave, not that he'll listen to anyone. I'm afraid.
"I'll deal with him in a little while,," she added. "Anything else before I take my bath?"
This was my chance. I thought. I glanced at Miss Harper. She stood there with her smile mask on her face, waiting. Something in her eyes and in my grandmother's tired eyes told me that it would be a waste of time to complain and might even get me into deeper trouble.
"No," I said.
"Then do as you're told," Grandmother Emma said, and left
"Your bath," Miss Harper reminded me.
I went to the bathroom and ran the water. At least Nancy had brought my bath oil to this bedroom. I thought. Just smelling it when I poured it into the water reminded me of Mama and helped me feel she was nearby, watching over
After I got into the water and soaked in the soft, scented bubbles, Miss Harper came into the bathroom, but I noticed she took great pains to avoid looking directly at me.
"I want you to wash your hair as well," she said. She laid out my clothing. "I'll be back in a while to see that you've done so.'
She starred out again and out of curiosity. I pushed the whirlpool button. The air churned the water around me, making the bubbles bigger and bigger so fast, they nearly covered my face. It made me laugh. Finally, something was fun. However, Miss Harper was back in the doorway because she heard the noise. When she saw what I had done, she screamed at me.
"Shut that off! We take baths to get clean and not to play in the water. You're too old for that sort of thing. Shut it off!"
I did quickly. The bubbles had gone to the very edge of the tub.
"Look at what you've done. You could have soaked the floor here. Never do that again."
"But why is it in the tub if I can't do it?"
"It's...stupid," she said, flustered by my question. "Just don't do it. It's time you got out, dried yourself, and got dressed."
"I didn't wash my hair yet." I said.
"Then don't dillydally anymore. Wash it.'
When I rose out of the bubbles, her eyes went to my buds. For a moment she looked intrigued, curious, and then she realized she was staring at my chest and pivoted like a soldier in a parade and was gone.
After I had dried and dressed myself, she returned to inspect me and finally gave me a compliment. "Very good," she said. "You know how to dress and brush your hair well. Now let's go to dinner. I understand from your grandmother that she has already begun to educate you on dining etiquette. I'll help with that at every meal."
I followed her out and down the stairs to the dining room. Grandmother Emma was already at the table. She looked very tired and very upset to me. Something new had happened. I was sure it involved Ian. He wasn't at the table.
"Where's Ian?" I asked.
"Your brother will not be taking any meals with us for the next three days,"
"Why not?"
"He is confined to his room," she said. "He left our property today, which is a direct violation of my order. He went walking on the road where there is a great deal of traffic, too. All we need now is another injury in this family and I'll go out of my mind. He is not permitted to do any of the things he likes to do outside until he learns how to behave and how to listen to Miss Harper.
"If he disobeys me this time. I might have to send him off to a military school camp. I've told him that, warned him. I will do it," she said.
I had no doubt she would.
Miss Harper looked at me, her face soaked in self-satisfaction.
Nancy didn't care about us. Grandmother Emma was totally on Miss Harper's side. Ian was locked up and I was alone.
Mama. I cried inside myself. Please, oh please, wake up.
I sank to my seat and my dinner etiquette instruction began in earnest.
I was beginning to feel as if I had been a victim of some evil magician who had caused my parents' accident and turned me into Miss Harper's puppet. She held my strings tightly in her long, thin fingers and tugged especially at the one tied to my heart.
I didn't have much of an appetite, but I had to eat as much as I could while under Miss Harper's eyes and instructions. She did say it wasn't proper for a young lady to eat a great deal and look like she hadn't had a meal for weeks. She made me eat slower, too. I could see that Grandmother Emma not only approved of Miss Haiper's comments and instructions, but truly appreciated them.
"Miss Harper's mother and I went to the same finishing school," she told me.
"That was fortunate for me," Miss Harper said. "My mother became my finishing school teacher after my father had passed away. Money wasn't as available. He never prepared for that eventuality enough," she continued.
Despite how much I disliked her. I couldn't help but be fascinated by what she would reveal about herself.
"Isn't that like most men?" Grandmother Emma said. "They think they'll live forever and need not worry that much about who will be left behind. I made sure my husband had plenty of life insurance. Every time I added to his policy or added a policy, he would rant and rave that it was money wasted. What it really did was remind him of his own mortality and no man wants that,"
"No, they don't," Miss Harper said. She said it with such bitterness I wondered if she liked her father at all. I could see that he might not have liked her.
"Whatever, your mother did a fine job with you, Millicent"
"Thank vou."
"How will Ian eat?" I asked when there was a lull in their conversation.
"He won't eat until tomorrow and then Nancy will bring him something to eat, but no sweets, no desserts," Grandmother Emma said. She turned to Miss Harper. "They say you can win a man's heart through his stomach. You can win his devotion and his obedience that way as well."
Miss Harper laughed.
It was the first time I had heard her laugh like that and I didn't like it because she was laughing at being mean to Ian. Her eyes shifted toward me and she saw the distaste I had for her in mine. I knew she did because she stopped laughing, cleared her throat, and then forced a smile at Grandmother Emma before glancing back at me, her eyes cold, angry, and even more hateful.
It
made me shudder inside and it took my breath away. I couldn't even swallow and was grateful when I was excused from the table and could hurry back upstairs.
I felt very sorry for Ian. I imagined he was very hungry, but I knew he would never complain or cry about it, even to me. I hesitated at the top of the stairway. I could hear Grandmother Emma and Miss Harper still talking at the dinner table. They would have their coffee and dessert for sure. I thought, and decided to risk seeing Ian.
He had his door locked. I didn't want to make a lot of noise, so I knocked softly and then I called to him in just over a whisper.
"Ian, it's me."
I waited and then he opened the door. "What?" he asked.
"Are you hungry?"
"No. I had an energy bar."
"Grandmother Emma said you can't come out for three days."
"We'll see. You'd better go before you get into trouble, too."
He started to close the door and then stopped. "Did she tell you anything about Father and Mother?"
I told him as best I could all that she had said.
"I know where Mother is," he said, "I'll be visiting her myself." He started to close the door.
"Ian."
"What?"
"I want to go, too," I said.
He thought a moment. "We'll see," he said. "Maybe," he added, and then closed the door.
I thought I heard Miss Harper on the stairs so I turned and walked quickly to my room to turn on the television set so she wouldn't know I had spoken with Ian. I had just gotten it on and sat when she stepped into my room. She looked at the books on my desk and picked up the one entitled
Becoming A Lady
. She brought it to me.
"Rather than watch something silly on television, you should read some of this, Jordan. We can talk about it tomorrow. Why don't you read up to here," she said, pointing to the beginning of chapter three.
"I'm tired of reading," I said.
"You should never be tired of reading. You should be tired of watching the idiot box first." "What's the idiot box?"
"That," she said, nodding at the television set and then flicking it off with the remote. She tapped the book she had placed beside me. "Read."
"You said my schoolwork was over," I whined,
"This isn't schoolwork, Jordan. It's more like learning how to live correctly. You won't be tested on it like you're tested on math and science and English. We'll just talk about it and practice what there is to practice. When you're older, you'll thank me," she said. "Be sure to brush your teeth," she added, and left the bedroom. She didn't close the door behind her, however. I was sure she would come back soon to see if I were reading or if I had turned the television on again.
I opened the book and began to read how important it was to make a good impression on people and how that is done through your behavior. I didn't understand some of the words and it was very boring to me. Before I had read two pages. I felt tired and closed my eyes.
"Well," I heard a little while later, and opened my eyes to see Miss Harper standing there again. "I can see we have to read this with you. We'll have to put it in our daily schedule after we do your other work."
I rubbed my eyes.
"Go brush your teeth and go to sleep," she said, taking the book and putting it back on my desk with the other books. "Don't forget now. As soon as you wake up, begin your chores."
After she left. I walked to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. I was moving in a daze, but I did everything I had to do, changed into my pajamas, and crawled under the blanket on my big bed. The house was very quiet. I had gotten used to some of the creaks and groans I used to hear on the other side, in my room. They made me feel secure somehow. The stillness on this side made me nervous and fidgety. I imagined that because Grandmother Emma slept on this side of the house, the house didn't dare make a sound.
Before I fell asleep again. I thought about all the things Grandmother Emma had said about Daddy. I knew depressed meant feeling sad. He didn't have us and he didn't have Mama with him in the hospital and he had learned he wouldn't walk and had to be in a wheelchair. I felt terrible for him and thought about the clip-clop of his cowboy boots when he walked down the hallway. He wouldn't want to wear them anymore, or any shoes for that matter. Why wear them if he couldn't stand up?
Mama will surely feel sorry for him, too, when she wakes up from her coma. I thought. She'll forgive him and she'll help him. That was why it was so important now, so much more important, that she did awaken. As soon as she did, she was sure to go to him.
I thought about her silence, too. Wherever she was, we weren't there. No one was talking to her. I was afraid she would feel we deserted her, forgot about her already. It was very important for Ian and me to go see her. I hoped he had a way to do it, but I couldn't imagine how. He couldn't drive and Felix wouldn't drive us.
Ian will think of something. I told myself. He's sitting in his room right now planning it out like one of his projects.
That thought and imagining Mama waking up and seeing us and smiling was what helped me feel secure enough to close my eyes and fall asleep in a room that had become more like a prison cell than anything else. I had to stay here and do schoolwork. I had to do my chores. I could be locked up in it, and most of all, no one I loved could come to me in it.
Maybe tomorrow, I thought. Maybe tomorrow will be better. It wasn't.
I didn't wake up early enough for Miss Harper, who was beside my bed, shaking me and yelling at me.
"You should have been up, washed, and dressed, all your chores completed by now. If it were a school day, you'd be in your classroom. We want to keep the same hours."
I blinked rapidly and then scrubbed my cheeks with my palms.
Impatient, she reached down, seized my right arm at the elbow, and nearly pulled it out of my shoulder tugging me into a sitting position.
"Out of bed!" she screamed. "I'll give you exactly ten minutes to complete your morning chores."