“What
’s
he
like?” His hands shook as he wrapped them around the mug of tea; he watched them as if fascinated.
“Are you cold?”
“Freezing...” his voice was full of nervous laughter. “
I’m
shaking like a jelly. What a wimp -” he stopped as his teeth began to chatter. “It must be the shock catching up with me.”
There weren’t any more spare covers at the spaceship anymore, so Jenny took off the top half of her Itor suit and placed it over his knees. Crouched beside him, she looked up.
“He has good intentions.”
“But does he treat you OK?”
“Yes, he
’s
been wonderful. After a rocky start, we teamed up. It works because we’d both hate to be alone again. Fly
’s
a good man, Matt, but he
’s
the governor here;
realiz
e that and you
’ll
both survive.” “He doesn’t want us here.”
“But you
are
here, and you
’re
being looked after by him. That doesn’t sound like he doesn’t want you here to me.”
“We’ve disturbed his
cozy
world with you.”
“Oh, bollocks, Matt. Fly
’s
glad for me.”
Matt looked at her incredulously. “You really believe that, don’t you?”
Jenny sighed, and rose to her feet. “Fly doesn’t mean you any harm. He
’s
going to help you because he
wants
to.”
Matt looked into his tea. “In the space of five minutes you’ve spoken his name four or five times.” He held up his hand. “Don’t preach about my “dirty mind”, but men of old are territorial about their women, and with us here he may -” be broke off with a shrug as Jenny glowered. “He may feel we
’re
in the way.”
“Then why did he bother to bring you here?”
He rubbed the back of his neck, and winced when he found a new bruise. “Well, that
’s
something he
’s
certainly regretting! You don’t need to be governed by him. Anyhow, you have us now. We can sit this out until Logan sends a rescue mission. You just mentioned there
’s
plenty of food. We needn’t hunt. We
’re
not animals or ancient cavemen, for Christ
’s
sake!”
Jenny
’s
mouth twitched at his disgusted face. “You haven’t heard me, have you? I like Fly, and I
’ll
not let you harm him. And
I’m
not
governed by him, I was merely warning you not to insult him by treating him as inferior. “
Matt shifted uncomfortably on the chair. “I just thought that if he was making you do things in exchange for -” he broke off as
color
crept into her cheeks. “Shit, Jen. that
’s
disgusting! Look, I know our past hasn’t been ideal, but that doesn’t mean
I’m
not on your side. You don’t have to force yourself to have sex with him anymore.” He glanced at his knee. “Well, maybe for a couple of weeks or so, but after that.”
“Shut up! You
’re
a hypocrite, you’ve never been on my side!” She stomped outside, openly shaking in anger.
What she and Fly had was precious; magical and wonderful. And to have him soil it with his filthy words wounded her as deeply as if he had punched her.
Sighing deeply she looked up at the sky, knowing that Fly
’s
warnings about them was true.
NINETEEN
“Sue... Where the hell am I? Sue?”
Jenny leaned over Bodie, gently soothing his ranting with soft
words.
His head and shoulders were propped up with pillows, and she had been dabbing his dry lips with water. His tongue darted out to capture a missed drop and, encouraged, she pressed the rim of the cup to his mouth. Most of it ran down his chin, but Bodie swallowed. Jenny felt triumphant.
She glanced across at Matt, who was eating a thick, pale- looking steak. He sucked on a bone, determined to get every last flake of meat. He appeared much more comfortable, too, she thought. His leg was propped up on another chair, and a pillow was tucked behind his back.
“I think he
’s
coming round,” she said.
““Bout time; lazy bastard,” he replied flippantly, but Jenny knew his rough talk was a mask to disguise his relief.
Bodie had been unconscious for days. He was dangerously thin, and Jenny was very worried.
She looked back at the ashen-faced man on the floor. “Time you woke up, Commander. “
“Sue...” he said, deep within his dream.
“No, it
’s
Jenny. Remember? Sue
’s
back home waiting for you. You
’re
both going to become grandparents - are grandparents by now,” she amended corrected. “Your daughter had just announced her pregnancy before we left, do you remember? I’ve a baby cousin I’ve never seen, and you’ve a grandchild.” She spoke on, often repeating herself, stroking his cheek and giving him the occasional sip of water.
“Sorry, Diana, haven’t looked after... Jen like I said I would...
sorry. Damn it Zack, why’d you open the portal?”
“Oh. Bodie, don’t...” Jenny
’s
eyes swam with tears. Then Bodie began to thrash, and his flying hand caught her on the shoulder and sent the cup of remaining water flying out of her hands.
“Matt!” she yelled, as Bodie
’s
upper body twisted, and one of his splintered legs fell off the mattress. But the large hand that sett
led on her shoulder wasn’t Matt’s. It was Fly’
s, and he placed a firm hand in the middle of Bodie
’s
chest and forced him to become still.
“Are Zack and Diana your father and mother?” he asked.
She nodded; mute. Her throat felt thick with tears.
“Who is Sue?”
“Bodie
’s
wife.” She sniffed, and rubbed her nose with the back of her hand, pulling herself up sharply. “Matt,
please
remember how long he
’s
been like this?”
“Told you. I was out cold after Taurus came down, and I don’t know. Does it matter? There
’s
nothing we can do about it, anyway.”
Jenny glared at him, and he sighed.
“Sometimes while we were holed up, he seemed “with it”, but then began rambling, like he was just then. He
’s
in a world of his own. “ Matt paused as if thinking over what he had said, then chuckled dryly. “Guess, we all are.”
As he spoke, Bodie opened his eyes and fixed a strong, steady gaze on Jenny.
“Jen...” he said, and a smile flared over his face. His eyes closed as his body relaxed; his chest rising and falling in a gentle motion.
With Bodie
’s
condition improving, Jenny felt some of the tension leave her body. She felt able to slip away to be with Fly more often, if only to reassure herself that they still had a relationship.
She snorted to herself. Who was she kidding? Fly didn’t love
her - even if his emotions could stretch that far.
If she hadn’t sought him out on those occasions she doubted she would ever see him. He brought meat back to the old spaceship leaving Jenny to cook it on the barbecue, and ate his food elsewhere.
It was as if he couldn’t tolerate to share his breathing space with the men. This suited Matt fine, but it grieved Jenny.
And today was the fifth day since they’d rescued the men, and Fly seemed nowhere nearer to accepting them. Jenny couldn’t put all the blame on him - Matt wasn’t accepting Fly either. It was a vicious circle, and one that only Jenny, it seemed, could see. She could only hope that once Bodie was well he’d correct the situation; Matt listened to Bodie. She sat worrying, knowing that if - no,
when,
Bodie woke up he’
d, more than likely, be on Matt
’s
side.
“I always knew women were the superior race,” she murmured. She and Matt sat outside the spaceship eating a breakfast of fried graddy leaves and leftover stew. She hadn’t seen Fly since last evening, and her brooding was rapidly turning to sulking.
“What
’s
that?” asked Matt.
“I was just thinking, you mistrust Fly, and he in turn mistrusts you. It
’s
catch twenty-two, isn’t it?”
“Not really,” he said, looking at her as if she were a moron. “You really believe it
’s
that simple, don’t you?”
“Well, obviously it isn’t
that
simple,” she said. “It
’s
going to take time.”
Matt cursed lightly. “I’ve a sudden compulsion to slap you,” he said. “To knock sense into you,” he added, as she glared at him.
She glared harder. “You
’re
the one that
’s
lacking in that department,” she said. “Just tell me what Fly has ever done to you that
’s
so bad?”
“F’
sake! You really can’t see it, can you?” he said in frustration. “You really are naive.”
“I am not! Honestly, you -”
“It
’s
either that or stupid.” He continued to eat.
Shoveling
it in as if it were his last meal.
“It
’s
you who can’t see it,” she said.
“I don’t want to discuss it anymore,” he said. “There
’s
no point.
I’m
not going to accept that alien. Ever,” he added. He shook his head. “I can’t get my head around you sleeping with him,
it’s
,” he shuddered for effect. “You can’t honestly believe that
’s
normal?” “And we
’re
really in a normal situation, aren’t we?”
He offered his plate towards her, saying with a grin, “If I give you this, will you shag me too?”
“Piss off, Matt.” She pushed his hand away and stood up.
Matt laughed, plainly pleased with his own
humor
and then continued to finish his breakfast.
“
I’m
going to find Fly,” she said. “Make sure you bury the leftovers, if there are any,” she added, watching for a moment as he put his empty plate down to begin on her unfinished food. “If not we
’ll
be under siege from wolves.”
“That
’s
it,” called Matt, as she climbed the hill. “Go and shag the alien, and maybe we
’ll
get pudding!”
She saluted him with her middle finger, and left him sitting outside the spaceship sipping melon juice with a smug look on his face.
She found Fly on the cliff top sitting beneath a group of trees, overlooking the beach. He was sharpening bones that would make excellent cutting tools.
Silently, Jenny sat next to him.
“Bodie
’s
getting better,” she said, for want of saying something. “Soon I
’ll
feel able to leave them alone and come back with you to the house. That is if you want me to.”
He put the bones down and leaned his head back against the
tree.
“I want you to,” he said at last, as if she’d asked him something that required a difficult answer.
She looked at him, but he still refused to meet her gaze. “I’ve missed you.” After a lengthy silence she touched his thigh lightly, “You
’re
supposed to say, “I’ve missed you, too.”“
“Your friends have changed things between us.”
“No. No!” she cried, and scrambled to her knees to face him. “They change absolutely nothing. What are you saying?”
Fly finally looked at her. “They change everything.”
“Not the way I feel about you. We have a relationship, don’t we? A partnership?”
“Maybe the partnership has finished. I have helped you survive and you have repaid the debt. Finished.”
She gasped. The hurt she felt from his words seemed to puncture her lungs, reminding her that he had only regarded her as a mere sexual diversion. She jerked away, unwilling for him to witness her crushed emotions.
“Repaid a debt?” she repeated angrily. “How can you say that? How, Fly?” She rounded on him tearfully. “Go on, tell me how?”
He looked puzzled, as if thinking over what he had said. “I have wounded you. I speak your language well, but sometimes when I am trying to describe my thoughts I find it difficult to turn them into your words.”
“Bodie and Matt don’t change anything between us.” She pointed to herself and then him. “We
’re
still Jenny and Fly. Still together. “
Fly was silent.
“I still need you,” she said softly. He wouldn’t understand “I love you”, so she chose the words closest to them. “If that
’s
what you want to hear, Fly, I need you and I don’t want us t-to finish. The debt hasn’t been repaid,” she added, just in case she wasn’t getting through. “And as far as
I’m
concerned, it never will be.”