Eden's Root (57 page)

“You know that I always love surprises from you,” he teased. Her mouth dropped open and she smacked his leg. He just would not let go of her little spying moment in the woods.

“Well it’s more of a surprise for Kiara,” she clarified as she plopped next to him and leaned to reach into a space between the bed and wall. She pulled out a large book with a white cover. To keep it secret, she held it behind her. Asher craned his neck and pretended to wrestle with her to get a glimpse, but she batted him away.

“Let me tell my story first,” she laughed, pushing him back with one arm while she held the book down. Asher gave in and sat still, his face amused. “Ok,” she began, “so when we first got together you said something in passing that I realized came from a favorite children’s book of mine.” He tilted his head, intrigued.

She took a deep breath. “It made me see the person inside, the person who came before,” she added and he nodded in understanding. “I know it helped me to trust you and I actually think it made me love you,” she admitted, turning red and laughing a little. Asher grabbed her free hand and started stroking it, giving her the shivers.

“So, anyway,” she tried to focus on her thoughts and not the electricity of his touch. “Another thing that made me love you was how wonderful you always were with the Family and the children, and especially,” she said with tears in her eyes, “with my family.” They were silent for a moment, both thinking of Maggie. “And most, most especially,” she added, brightening, “with Kiara. And soooooooo,” her voice grew excited, “on my last raid I got something that was to be just for you and Kiara.” She pulled the book from behind her and set it onto Asher’s lap.

“Oh my God, Fi!” he laughed and turned it over in his hands. “A Light in the Attic.” His voice was warm, like he’d discovered an old friend. “I loved Shel Silverstein when I was a kid,” he said with a happy smile. She nodded.

“I know. And I know that Kiara will love him as well,” she said. “Before our last Seek, I searched Eden high and low for his books and didn’t find them. I knew I wanted to get this for Kiara, for you,” she added, “and so I also grabbed a ton of other children’s books for the colony as a whole to justify bringing something special, something personal, back from a colony Seek.”

She searched Asher’s face for disapproval. They both knew that Seeks were for the colony, not for personal gain. Asher smiled at her. Phew, that was good, she thought. She was worried he would be disappointed in her. She continued. “I wanted you to be able to give this to Kiara for Christmas, so you could sit together and read it with her. I wanted it to be something that Kiara would own, that would be all hers, from you,” she finished and Asher shook his head.

“You’re really something Fionualla,” he smiled. “That you would feel that you had to do something for the whole colony to justify one tiny kindness toward your sister,” he began, stroking her jaw. With a happy sigh, she closed her eyes for a moment. “That you would do something nice for both your sister and for me at the same time,” he continued, “and,” he chuckled, “somehow tie your love for me into it too.”

“I know,” she joked, “it’s probably overkill,” she admitted and Asher hugged her with his free hand and then opened the book. He grinned at her.

“I know this is for Kiara,” he said, “but how about we read a few together before we give it to her tonight?” Fi nodded with enthusiasm while Asher turned the pages. Suddenly he stopped and turned to her. “So what did I say?” he asked and she frowned, confused. “When we first ‘got together’ you said.”

“Oh!” she laughed and turned to the table of contents. Then she flipped through to the right poem and pointed. Asher burst out laughing.

“This? This was the thing I said that made you trust me?” His body shook. “Oh God,” he gasped, holding his stomach with his free hand. Tears came to his eyes. “This was the thing I said that made you
love
me?” This question came out between gasps as he pointed again at the page. Fi nodded, covering her mouth as she laughed with him.

“True story!” she admitted while she doubled over. “What can I say?” She had no explanation for herself either. Asher’s laughter slowed and he took a deep breath, wiping the tears from his eyes.

“Oh God,” he breathed, “Oh Fi,” he shook his head. He turned to her with a smile. “Fi, I don’t know how we would have met in the other world,” he began and Fi breathed in sharply. She had never thought about that before. What if they had never met? “And so here I am, feeling guilty that I’m so damned happy every day,” he said and Fi nodded in understanding. It did seem unfair to be so insanely happy, given the world outside. “But now I know for sure that we were meant to be.” He patted the book.

“Because I got you that book?” Fi asked, confused.

“No,” he shook his head, “Because I remember now.” His voice grew firm and Fi was startled by the sudden intensity in his eyes. “I remember saying this,” he pointed to the book, and Fi’s heart fluttered. He remembered that? Her eyes searched his as he shook his head. “At first I didn’t understand because you said that this referred to ‘when we first got together’. I thought you meant my birthday since that was the first time that we, you know, said how we felt.” Fi nodded and a slow smile crept across her face as she realized where he was headed. He did remember. Asher shook his head and looked at the book again.

“But that’s not what, or rather, when you meant, was it?” he asked and Fi shook her head.

“No,” she smiled down at her hands in her lap.

“I said this,” he pointed at the page, “the very first time we sat and strategized, inside the garden, right after the attack.” His words were quiet and soft, each one leading the memory one step farther back in time. “I said this to you the day that we met,” he emphasized. Fi held her breath and nodded. Her eyes shone.

“When I felt it and when I admitted it were not the same,” she explained as a happy tear ran down one cheek. Asher reached out and brushed it away and kissed her. He pulled away and met her eyes.

“That’s how I know we were meant to be,” his voice was rough. “Because that’s when I felt it too.” Then he took a deep breath and sighed. He turned back to the book and smiled again. “Thank you for this Fi,” he said, “and for everything,” he added and she lowered her eyes in embarrassment.

“So shall we have a ceremonial reading?” she proposed and Asher nodded.

“Of course, very appropriate,” he said and cleared his throat. As he started to read, he struggled to suppress his laugher.

“You may leave the clam on the ocean's floor,” he began with a snicker, and then Fi chimed in.

“
It's all the same to the clam
.”

----------- Fi -----------

“Ouch!” Fi cried and put her fingertip in her mouth where she’d gotten it with the needle. She was sitting in the small family room of the Skillman family pod. Like most of Eden, it was painted a dull grey color. Fi wasn’t sure who picked that, she thought every time she flipped on the light and saw it in her own pod. It was so grim. Now she perched on a small vinyl chair with a corner of the sewing project secured in her left hand.

“Careful,” Lucy chided her with a chuckle. Fi was not the type to sit and patiently sew anything by hand, so Lucy appreciated her help. They stopped for a moment and Lucy held up the small quilt, shaking it out so that they could see their work.

“It’s beautiful Aunt Lucy,” Fi smiled. Even though it wasn’t her kind of thing, she was glad to help with this project. Lucy was sewing a special quilt for Rachel. It was something Lucy’s mother and grandmother had both done for their own children, but the tradition had ended with Lucy. When they went on the run, Lucy had become the one who had taken responsibility for all sewing and repairs. The altered backpack that had borne her daughter safely to Eden had been her handiwork.

“I always knew how to sew from my mama, of course,” Lucy told Fi as they worked on the quilt, heads down. “I just didn’t particularly care for it,” she explained and Fi chuckled through her teeth, a pin held in them at the moment. “I didn’t see the point,” Lucy said. “Clothing and linens were everywhere and they were so cheap. Why would anyone spend time hand sewing anything?” Thinking of her pinpricked fingertips, Fi had to agree.

“I understand Aunt Lucy,” she agreed. “But now…” she said, leading Lucy’s thoughts.

“Yes,” Lucy confirmed. “Now I understand and am so thankful that I knew how to do it.” Fi knew she was thinking of that pack, with Rachel’s tired legs dangling from it. All thoughts of that time were chased from their minds when Lucy held up the beautiful little quilt they were working on now. Each square had something in it about a family member, as well as his or her first initial. They were making it from scraps of linen that were too destroyed to be useful to the colony anymore. It wasn’t like fabric, or anything for that matter, was readily available to give as gifts.

Most Christmas gifts were actually just swaps these days. They were things that you no longer needed or wanted, but which someone else might like such as cards, games, instruments, or clothing. In Eden, everyone knew how to barter. Despite this, everyone in the Family had wanted to make something special for Rachel. They were all so happy that she seemed to be doing well. Behind Lucy they heard a noise and the two hid the quilt just before a smiling Rachel walked into the room with John. Fi noticed that his face was very flushed and almost sweaty. He nodded to her in greeting.

“We were going to wait to tell everyone until tonight,” he said, setting his hands on Rachel’s shoulders. Fi could see that Lucy was holding her breath. What was up, she wondered? “But it’s fitting that Fi be here, be with us.”

“Tell me John,” Lucy said, her voice trembling. As Fi watched, tears welled up in John’s eyes and they started to fall.

“It’s a miracle Lu,” he said and started to cry outright. “She’s clean,” he choked and Rachel’s tears began to fall as well. Lucy howled in relief and jumped up and hugged them both fiercely as they cried. Fi did not want to disturb them so she sat in silence, happy but confused.

“C’mere Fi,” John roared over his wife’s head and waved her to join them. “You did it!” He folded her into their arms as she approached. “You did it Fi,” he hugged her.

“I did what?” Her head swung between all the tearful, happy faces. It was Rachel who explained. Embracing her, Rachel looked into her eyes.

“I’m in remission Fi,” she said and then she started crying again. “The cancer is gone.”

“Oh God Rach!” Fi exclaimed and she hugged Rachel again hard. “Oh God, Thank God!” she said and she felt herself begin to cry as she held Rachel close. Her tears were a release from all of those days and nights spent worrying, from the memories of deciding whether to give Rachel the meds or not, and of then watching her suffer and fade. And now here was Rachel, pink and well fed, with a full head of hair. And she was in remission. It was true; Fi thought to herself, she had done it. She had saved Rachel Skillman’s life. Well, she thought humbly, Eden had saved Rachel’s life.

When they arrived, Rachel had been very near death. There was no means to do a bone marrow transplant in Eden and they’d run low on the oral chemotherapy drugs. Every night Rachel crossed Fi’s mind, the sole worry still dancing around inside her, stealing her sleep. Fi sighed, releasing her friend who was really like another little sister. Smiling tearfully, she sniffed. “I can’t think of any better Christmas present in the entire world,” she said and all three of them laughed in relief.

----------- Fi -----------

A few weeks after Christmas, Fi visited Sara’s pod. Sara and her little sister Lily huddled in Sara’s bedroom, watching Fi try on dresses. The girls both perched on Sara’s bed, serving as Fi’s audience and fashion advisors. Fi had finally given in and accepted that she could bear school once she had befriended Sara. Despite her rocky start with the students overall, everyone had adjusted. The others realized that Fi was not going to be a good source of information pretty quickly and it was Sara who had really made that clear.

It was only Fi’s fifth class with them when Sara had shouted, “Enough already!” Everyone was startled, including Fi. Sara had glared at the other students. “Haven’t you guys figured out that she doesn’t want to talk about it?” Sara had smirked at Fi. “Ignore them,” she’d said and Fi had actually smiled back.

Sara was a very lovely girl, with long silky black hair and dark, almost black eyes. She had a heart shaped face and an easy smile. They started sitting together and soon Fi found herself talking and joking with her like a real friend. Sara was her first real friend that was a girl her own age, she thought with a smile.

Now Fi stood barefoot, staring at her reflection in the burgundy dress Sara had offered to lend her for her birthday. When she had slipped into this dress, both Sara and her little sister Lily had gasped and nodded.

“That one!” Lily cried and Sara agreed.

“That’s the one Fi,” Sara said. “You look like an angel in it.” Fi balked, screwing up her lips and jutting her hip. Now she felt deflated.

“What?” Lily frowned. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t want to look like an angel!” Fi said petulantly, swinging the skirt with her hands. “Well I don’t want to look like a little girl anyway,” she admitted. Lily and Sara both laughed.

“I meant that you look like a beautiful angel Fi!” Sara assured her, and then pausing, she added. “A very enticing angel.” Fi blushed. Enticing would do, she thought, peering at herself again. The door slid open a crack and all three girls turned as they heard a voice.

“Sorry to interrupt ladies but is Fi…” Sean’s voice trailed off as he stepped into the room and she turned around. His eyes widened. “Wow, Fi!” he said and she blushed, dropping her head. “Is that for Asher, for your birthday?” She nodded and he gave a low whistle.

“Do you think he’ll like it?” she asked him anxiously, smoothing the front of it with her hands. Sean laughed out loud.

“Fi, he will drop dead when he sees you in that dress,” he walked toward her with open arms. He gave her a big hug and Fi saw a strange expression cross Sara’s face over his shoulder. As they separated, he gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek.