Eleanor & Park (39 page)

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Authors: Rainbow Rowell

BOOK: Eleanor & Park
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house,
his
mom would love that.

The only thing Eleanor would

have to figure out was the dress


Did they even make prom

dresses in her size? She’d have to

shop in the mother-of-the-bride

section. And she’d have to rob a

bank. Seriously. Even if a

hundred-dollar bill fell right out of

the sky, Eleanor could never

spend it on something as stupid as

a prom dress.

She’d spend it on new Vans.

Or a decent bra. Or a boom box


Actually, she’d probably just

give it to her mom.

Prom
. As if.

Park

After she’d agreed to go to next

year’s prom with him, Eleanor

also agreed to accompany Park to

his first cotillion, the Academy

Awards after-party, and any and

all ‘balls’ to which he received

invitations.

She giggled so much, the geese

complained.

‘Go on and honk,’ Eleanor

said.

‘You

think

you

can

intimidate me with your swanlike

good looks, but I’m not that kind

of girl.’

‘Lucky for me,’ Park said.

‘Why is that lucky for you?’

‘Never mind.’ He wished he

hadn’t said it. He’d meant to be

funny and self-deprecating, but he

didn’t actually want to talk about

how she managed to be attracted

to him.

Eleanor was studying him

coolly.

‘You’re the reason that goose

thinks I’m shallow,’ she said.

‘I think it’s a gander, right?’

Park

said.

‘The

males

are

ganders?’

‘Oh, right, gander. That suits

him. Pretty boy … So, why is that

lucky for you?’

‘Because,’ he said, like both

syllables hurt.

‘Because, why?’ she asked.

‘Isn’t that my line?’

‘I thought I could you ask you

anything …’ she said. ‘Because,

why?’

‘Because of my all-American

good looks.’ He ran his hand

through his hair and looked down

at the mud.

‘Are you saying that you’re not

good-looking?’ she asked.

‘I don’t want to talk about

this,’ Park said, hanging onto the

back of his neck. ‘Can we go back

to talking about prom?

‘Are you saying it just so that

I’ll tell you how cute you are?’


No
,’ he said. ‘I’m saying it

because it’s kind of obvious.’

‘It’s not obvious,’ Eleanor

said. She turned on the bench so

she was facing him, and pulled his

hand down.

‘Nobody thinks Asian guys are

hot,’ Park said finally. He had to

look away from her when he said

it – way away, he turned his head

completely. ‘Not here, anyway. I

assume Asian guys do all right in

Asia.’

‘That’s not true,’ Eleanor

argued. ‘Look at your mom and

dad …’

‘Asian girls are different.

White guys think they’re exotic.’

‘But …’

‘Are you trying to come up

with a super-hot Asian guy, so

you can prove me wrong?

Because there aren’t any. I’ve had

my whole life to think about this.’

Eleanor folded her arms. Park

looked out at the lake.

‘What about that old TV

show,’ she said, ‘with the karate

guy?’


Kung Fu
?’

‘Yeah.’

‘That actor was white, and that

character was a monk.’

‘What about …’

‘There aren’t any,’ Park said.

‘Look at
M*A*S*H
. The whole

show takes place in Korea, and the

doctors are always flirting with

Korean girls, right? But the nurses

don’t use their R&R to go to

Seoul to pick up hot Korean guys.

Everything that makes Asian girls

seem exotic makes Asian guys

seem like girls.’

The gander was still honking

at them. Park picked up a chunk

of melting snow and tossed it half-

heartedly in the goose’s direction.

He still couldn’t look at Eleanor.

‘I don’t know what any of that

has to do with me,’ she said.

‘It has everything to do with

me,’ he answered.

‘No.’ She put her hand on his

chin and made him face her. ‘It

doesn’t … I don’t even know

what it means that you’re Korean.’

‘Beyond the obvious?’

‘Yeah,’ she said, ‘
exactly
.

Beyond the obvious.’

Then she kissed him. He loved

it when she kissed him first.

‘When I look at you,’ she said,

leaning into him, ‘I don’t know if

I’m thinking you’re cute
because

you’re Korean, but I don’t think

it’s in spite of it. I just know that I

think you’re cute. Like,
so cute
,

Park …’

He loved it when she said his

name.

‘Maybe I’m really attracted to

Korean guys,’ she said, ‘and I

don’t even know it.’

‘Good thing I’m the only

Korean guy in Omaha,’ he said.

‘And good thing I’m never

getting out of this dump.’

It was getting cold, and

probably late; Park wasn’t wearing

a watch.

He stood up and pulled

Eleanor to her feet. They held

hands and cut through the park to

get to the car.


I
don’t even know what it

means to be Korean,’ he said.

‘Well, I don’t know what it

means to be Danish and Scottish,’

she said. ‘Does it matter?’

‘I think so,’ he said, ‘because

it’s the number-one thing people

use to identify me. It’s my main

thing.’

‘I’m telling you,’ she said, ‘I

think your main thing might be

that

you’re

cute.

You’re

practically
adorable.’

Park didn’t mind the word

adorable.

Eleanor

They’d parked on the far side of

the Market, and the lot was mostly

empty by the time they got back.

Eleanor felt tense and reckless

again. Maybe it was something

about this car …

The Impala might not look

pervy on the outside, not like a

fully carpeted custom van or

something – but the inside was a

different story. The front seat was

almost as big as Eleanor’s bed,

and the back seat was an Erica

Jong novel just waiting to happen.

Park opened the door for her,

then ran around the car to get in.

‘It’s not as late as I thought,’ he

said, looking at the clock on the

dash. 8:30.

‘Yeah …’ she said. She put

her hand down on the seat

between them. She tried to do it

casually, but it came off pretty

obvious.

Park laid his hand on top of

hers.

It was just that kind of night.

Every time she looked at him, he

was looking back at her. Every

time she thought about kissing

him, he was already closing his

eyes.

Read my mind now, she

thought.

‘Are you hungry?’ he asked.

‘No,’ she said.

‘Okay.’ Park took his hand

away and put the key in the

ignition. Eleanor reached up and

caught his sleeve before he could

turn it.

He dropped the keys and, all in

one motion, he turned and

scooped her into his arms.

S er io u s ly,
scooped
.

He

was

always stronger than she expected

him to be.

If you were watching them

now (and you totally could

because the windows weren’t

fogged over yet) you’d think that

Eleanor and Park did this kind of

thing all the time. Not just the

once before.

This

time

was

already

different.

They weren’t moving forward

in orderly steps, like a game of

Mother May I? They weren’t even

kissing each other square on the

mouth. (Lining things up neatly

would take too long.) Eleanor

climbed up his shirt, climbing on

top of him. And Park kept pulling

her to him, even when she

couldn’t come any closer.

She was wedged between Park

and the steering wheel, and when

he pushed his hand up her shirt,

she leaned against the horn. They

both

jumped,

and

Park

accidentally bit her tongue.

‘Are you okay?’ he asked.

‘Yeah,’ she said, glad that he

didn’t pull his hand away. Her

tongue didn’t seem to be bleeding.

‘You?’

‘Yeah …’ He was breathing

heavy, and it was wonderful.
I did

this to him
, she told herself.

‘Do you think …’ he said.

‘What?’ He probably thought

they should stop. No, she thought,

no, I don’t think.
Don’t think,

Park
.

‘Do you think we should …

don’t think I’m a creep, okay? Do

you think we should get in the

back seat?’

She pushed off of him and slid

over the back seat. God, it was

huge, it was glorious.

Not even a second later, Park

landed on top of her.

Park

She felt so good underneath, even

better than he’d expected. (And

he’d expected her to feel like

heaven, plus nirvana, plus that

scene

in
Willy Wonka
where

Charlie starts to fly.) Park was

breathing so hard, he couldn’t get

any air.

It seemed impossible that this

could feel as good to Eleanor as it

did to him – but she was making

these faces … She looked like a

girl in a Prince video. If Eleanor

was feeling anything like what he

was feeling, how were they ever

supposed to stop?

He pulled her shirt up over her

head.

‘Bruce Lee,’ she whispered.

‘What?’ That didn’t seem

right. Park’s hands froze.

‘Super-hot Asian guy. Bruce

Lee.’

‘Oh …’ He laughed, he

couldn’t help it. ‘Okay. I’ll give

you Bruce Lee …’

She arched her back and he

closed his eyes. He’d never get

enough of her.

CHAPTER 46

Eleanor

Richie’s

truck

was

in

the

driveway, but the whole house

was dark, thank God. Eleanor was

sure that something would give

her away. Her hair. Her shirt. Her

mouth. She felt radioactive.

She and Park had been sitting

in the alley for a while, in the

front seat, just holding hands and

feeling whiplashed. At least, that’s

how Eleanor felt. It wasn’t that

she and Park had gone too far,

necessarily – but they’d gone a

whole lot farther than she’d been

prepared

for.

She’d

never

expected to have a love scene

straight out of a Judy Blume book.

Park must be feeling strange,

too. He sat through two Bon Jovi

songs without even touching the

radio. Eleanor had left a mark on

his shoulder, but you couldn’t see

it anymore.

This was her mom’s fault.

If Eleanor were allowed to

have normal relationships with

boys, she wouldn’t have felt like

she had to hit a home run the very

first time she ended up in the back

seat of a car – she wouldn’t have

felt like it might be her only time

at bat. (And she wouldn’t be

making these stupid baseball

metaphors.) It hadn’t been a home

run, anyway. They’d stopped at

second base. (At least, she thought

it was second base. She’d heard

conflicting definitions for the

bases.) Still …

It was wonderful.

So wonderful that she wasn’t

sure how they’d survive never

doing it again.

‘I should go in,’ she said to

Park, after they’d been sitting in

the car a half-hour or more. ‘I’m

usually home by now.’

He nodded but didn’t look up

or let go of her hand.

‘Okay,’ she said. ‘We’re …

okay, right?’

He looked up then. His hair

had flattened out, and it fell in his

eyes.

He

looked

concerned.

‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Oh.
Yeah
. I’m

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