Embrace the Desire (20 page)

So much for her not being like her father.

“How dare you?” Her voice was a symphony of velvety sounds, twisting and turning inside his head creating a blinding pain right behind his eyes. “I'm not a piece of meat to be bargained for! You want Damon's bitch, find another way to get her!”

Payne grabbed his head, her voice booming louder, her words ringing in his ears. Varick had said she was an empath, but this was much more than just that. He felt a sharp crisp pain in his heart that made him gasp. He staggered back as he locked eyes with her again.

A cold look fell upon her face as she raised her hand and pointed at his chest. “I can feel your agony. I can feel what your mind refuses to acknowledge.”

“Get out of my head.” His order went unnoticed and he decided to take a different approach to the matter.

He lunged forward, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her from the floor. With a step to the side, he threw her on the couch and held her hands over her head.

“Listen princess, you need to calm down before you get hurt.” Payne planted his knee between her thighs. “If you want bullshit laced answers and sweet words of innocence about what's happening to you, talk to someone else. Simple and to the point, this is the way it is. You have to have sex or you're going to be dead. And like it or not, if you die, your soul will not go to the Heavens with the angels, that's for humans not for the One Race.”

Her eyes calmed, returned to their steel color. Her rigid body went slack under him as tears pooled in her eyes. Releasing her hands, he ran his fingers down her face wiping away the tears that ran from the corners of her eyes.

She spoke softly, her voice a mere whisper of sound. “I saw inside of you. I touched some dark part of your heart.”

“I know I'm cold. I'm not the gentleman you deserve, but I can take you through the Burning safely.” He breathed in her scent. “I got a boatload of bad shit in my head and more agony inside of me than even the Algea can handle, but I won't lie to you about anything.”

He could handle the pain, the betrayals, and all the bad shit he had been through. It fueled his hate for his father and the demons he commanded. It kept him sequestered, cold, and untouchable. Unlovable. But he wouldn't wish it on anyone else, especially not on Chanta.

“The pain inside of you is so intense, so agonizing. I am so sorry for intruding.” She took a deep rattling breath. “I don't know what came over me. I have never been that overcome with anger.”

“It's part of the Burning.” He tried to smile. “And besides, that is the one emotion I seem to elicit from just about everyone that crosses my path.”

She raised her hand and touched his face. Her touch was soft, warm, and something inside his heart snapped. No one had ever touched him to soothe him. No one had ever looked at him as she was doing. The compassion in her eyes made him feel weak, made his heart skip a beat.

“Why would my mother want me to die if I won't ascend to the Heavens?” He wiped away more tears as she continued. “Why would she lie to me?”

“I don't know.” Payne ran his finger across her lips. “I wish I did know so that I could ease your mind with the answers you seek.”

The words were out before he even knew what he was thinking. He clamped his lips tight, felt the edges of his fangs tearing into his flesh.

He wanted to kiss her, to taste her again. She was infectious, addictive. And the way she was looking at his lips, her skin flushing made him want it even more.

When she laid her hand against his cheek, his entire body jerked. As he took possession of her lips, she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulled him closer until there was no space left between their bodies.

Chanta tasted of honey and she was so warm and soft. Her scent drilled its way home, pushing his erection to full mast. He deepened the kiss and she arched under him, a soft moan slipping from her lips.

In an instant, he brought her up to her feet and turned to sit on the couch pulling her into his lap. Tugging at the robe, he slipped it over her head and threw it on the couch beside of him. He watched her emotions dance across her face.

Chanta reached for the robe, apprehension written on her face. Shivers of pleasure rippled down his spine as she paused and ran her hands down his arms. Her hands were hot and his body was hard, hard everywhere.

She quickly grabbed and pulled the robe to her chest as her nipples hardened. He smiled as he traced little circles on her knees and she groaned.

Payne watched as her face reddened at his touch. He made a path from her knees to her waist and liked her response. She grabbed his hands, the robe falling and revealing her breasts. He slid up along her thigh, her hands urging him on. He was shocked and relieved that she was enjoying his touch and it pleased him. His eyes moved to her lips as she leaned forward.

When she stopped, he almost didn't look into her eyes, afraid that she had realized what she was doing with the devil's son. What he saw there stopped his heart.

The gentleness and understanding that stared back at him made him tremble. Him, of all the Destroyers, trembled under a woman's soft touch and compassion-filled eyes.

She cupped his face in her hands and leaned her forehead against his. “I barely touched what is inside of you and yet I know you aren't evil. After all you have suffered and been through, your heart is still pure. You would give your life to protect someone innocent, to ensure they don't suffer as you have.”

Payne swallowed at her soft tone, her heartfelt words wrapping around that cold muscle in his chest. He didn't know how to handle what he was feeling, didn't know what to say or do, and he didn't understand how she could stand the sight of him let alone be touching him simply because she wanted to. The only woman ever to stand the sight or feel of him had been Bastilla.

He ground his teeth as he dropped his head. If he allowed Chanta to continue, would she betray him as well? Would she chisel her way into his heart and then destroy it as Bastilla had done?

And then there was the sex part. All his life, he had witnessed nothing but the roughest, most grotesque sexual acts known to man and even more than an ordinary man could ever dream of in a thousand lifetimes.

“Payne?” Chanta was in his ear, her naked body tempting him beyond reason or sanity. “I can feel your hurt, your heartache.”

He shoved her back, fearful of what she was doing to him. “You need to stop. I'm not some game you need to figure out or feel sorry for. All you need from me is sex and that's all you're going to get.”

Her breath fell in and out, smooth and calm. “It's not all you're going to get from me. And no, you're not a game. But you know what, if that's all you're able to give me, then I'll take it because I know that's all that wall around your heart is going to let you do.”

Chanta ran her hand up Payne's chest to his neck and leaned forward. She had to kiss those amazing lips before she chickened out. Her lips brushed his and she pressed harder as his hands went to her back. Almost timidly he kissed her back as if he was unsure what to do. But she knew he could kiss. It wasn't like she hadn't been reliving the kiss he had given her every single minute of every single day. His mouth opened as if he were going to speak and she slid her tongue into his mouth.

The pleasure that rocked her body was unreal and intense as she licked his tongue with hers. He groaned as she deepened the kiss and crushed her body closer to his. She had never experienced a thing like this. He growled as her crotch rubbed against his and he caught his breath as she pulled away from his mouth and nipped at his bottom lip.

Chanta slowly opened her eyes and looked at Payne's face. His expression was a look of utter fascination. She couldn't tell if he was shocked, happy, mad, turned on, turned off, or upset. Suddenly embarrassed with her actions, she hid her face in his neck.

They sat still in the silence and it stretched on for what felt like hours. In the moments when she had been out of control, her anger so intensified that her emotional blocks slipped away, she saw Payne for what he was. His soul was teetering on the edge between good and evil. One small push could make him go either way.

She whispered, “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. Just let go of me and I will get off of you.”

“Do it again.” He whispered back as he pulled her head from his neck to face him again. “Do it again.”

Chanta tried to read him as she leaned forward and ran her tongue across his lips. He tasted good, salt and sugar all mixed together. She slid her tongue into his mouth as his hands went to her butt. As she wrapped her arms around his neck, she felt his erection through his pants. He groaned and held her hips as he arched up. She moaned as she pressed down and pulled from his mouth. He caught her lips as she tried to pull away and greedily kissed her.

Chanta's insides went wild as his hands moved up her back and came around to her breasts. He slowly cupped them and released her lips. She arched forward and pulled his head to her chest. He grinned as he took one of her nipples into his mouth and sucked hard. Her response thickened his arousal and he bit down. She grabbed his face and he slid his tongue around her nipple.

His other hand traveled down her ribs, down her stomach, and down the inside of her thigh. She opened her eyes and met his as his hand went between her legs. She moaned and tried to lean forward, but he held her still.

“Look at me,” he whispered.

She watched his face as he slid his fingers across her womanhood. She was wet with excitement and he smiled as he slid one finger inside of her heat. She kissed his lips as he went deeper inside of her. The sensation that was driving inside of her body was unlike anything she had ever felt; she was hot—hell, she was on fire. His fingers were delicious, long, thick, and were hitting all the right spots.

His eyes held hers as he made love to her with his hand and the look on his beautiful face was satisfaction enough, but damn it, she wanted more. His grin widened and she felt his temperature rise. Was she going through the Burning or was he? She was unable to differentiate between her heat and his. His breath hit her in the face like a wave of hell's heat. He had some serious fire in him and it was coming out one way or the other. Her eyes burned, but she refused to shut them as she licked his lips again.

Chanta was lost in a whirlpool of colors, sweet chaos, and a rising heat. Her skin blazed and felt like it was melting, but there was no pain, just overwhelming pleasure. Her eyes closed as she let the feeling carry her body and her hands found his. His—oh it was Payne's hands, Payne's body, Payne's eyes. She wanted him, she needed him, and she had to have him. She arched back as her birthmark bit into her flesh. She wanted to cry out but the pleasure was more intense than the pain.

She heard Payne's voice. His tender tone catching at her heart. “It's going to be okay. Just go with it. Don't fight it.” As if she wanted to fight her body's desire to have his? “I'm right here.”

As she leaned back and let the pain from her ankle run up her body, her heartbeat sounded in her ears and her spine twisted underneath her skin. She wondered why she wasn't afraid; she wondered what was happening but his hands were so warm, gentle, and creating a fierce need inside of her.

Her shoulders ached and she fell forward as something hot gushed down her back. She screamed out as she felt the skin on her shoulder blades rip open. Her fingernails dug into Payne's hands as the pain intensified. She felt as if her spine was forcing itself out of her skin.

• • •

Payne honestly didn't know what was coming next; he had never taken a woman through her Burning, but so far he was enjoying it. She arched against his chest and grabbed his hair. He watched in amazement as her eyes turned red and her hair flew back from her face and went completely white except for the red highlights that appeared. Payne's eyes narrowed as her fingernails dug into his hands.

Her skin glowed with a pale white light as delicately etched black and red flames raced up her legs like tattoos appearing without the needle. He squeezed her thighs as the flames ran up her stomach and under his hands.

Her skin was on fire—hot, beautiful, and worthy. Payne growled in pleasure as the flames circled her arms and ran up her neck to lick at her cheeks. She was everything and more; she was breathtaking and intoxicating, and he would die for her in this moment.

Payne beheld her, in her true form, and what a gorgeous sight to behold. She was covered in black and red flames that seemed to have a life of their own as they licked up her body. Her eyes had turned from red back to that swirling silver and black and her lips seemed fuller, healthier. The wings on her back extended, the feathers were white and each one was tinged with red. Her white hair fell across his chest like silk and shimmered as he ran one hand through it. It could have very well contained the stars from heaven within its shine.

He reached to her face and pulled it up to look into her brilliant shining eyes. Tears ran down her cheeks and steamed as the flames licked them away. She was amazing and sexier than he had envisioned her before. True, she resembled Gyth, but this woman before him, this goddess, she was special, she was Chanta.

He smiled; she was his Enchantress. His.

“This is the Burning.”

• • •

Chanta's body ached and burned as she tried to fight the pain that was cutting down her pleasure. She cried as Payne ran his knuckles gently down her face. She was hurting in places that she couldn't fathom. Every bone, every muscle, every nerve ending was on fire. She tried to pull away and lashed out at him as he gently lifted her and stood. She twisted and screamed in outrage at the pain.

“The pain you're feeling is going to get worse. You won't be yourself as the Burning eats your blood and devours your soul. You must fight, you must want to stay alive. I'm right here to help when the time comes. When it does, you'll know what to do.”