Embrace the Heat (14 page)

Miles felt a hysterical laugh building up
inside of him. This might be the biggest irony in his life. He and
Roger would become the thing they’d been told they should look down
upon.

Miles knew he was beyond salvation. His soul
was black with the stains of his sins. Standing by and allowing
others to commit atrocities had made them his own sins. Following
along with the crowd so he wouldn’t be alone, made it even worse.
He wondered how many others merely turned their backs on what was
happening. Then he wondered how much different life would have been
had more people been strong enough to do the right thing a hundred
years ago. By now, he’d be long dead, but perhaps he’d have earned
that reward of peace his mother had spoken of so often. Too late
now. So many shameful memories came to mind.

Miles wondered if this was what happened when
your life passed before your eyes? Was it just a series of bad
mistakes playing over and over?

“Are you ready?” Craig asked, holding the
life altering syringe. No need to swab the area. Why worry
about disease when you injected someone with the king of all
diseases?

“No,” Miles said and looked down at the hands
he hadn’t realized he was clenching. Strange that he’d missed the
pain of his own nails biting into his flesh. “I suppose it is
time.”

Craig looked around nervously and lowered his
voice. No doubt he was afraid Roger would overhear what he said.
“You don’t have to do this.”

A thought occurred to Miles, and he wasn’t
sure why he hadn’t considered the possibility before. “It would be
so easy for you to kill us now. Roger has never treated you
well.”

Craig looked away guiltily.

“Is this it then?” Miles asked almost
hopefully.

Craig shook his head. “You should know your
cousin better than that. Naturally, he thought I’d betray him.”

“Then what’s to stop you?” Miles asked and
saw the genuine fear in Craig’s eyes. “Don’t worry about me telling
Roger. I’ve even considered it myself, but I’m too squeamish for
that sort of thing. I’ve never actually killed anyone, but you
have. Why not do it now?”

“Fear,” Craig admitted, and he looked away.
“Roger had me strapped down while a slow acting poison was injected
into my blood stream. I’m not sure what it is, and I’m not sure I
could figure it out before it’s too late. If Roger dies, I
die.”

“And me?” Miles asked with more curiosity
than fear.

Craig shrugged. “I have no reason to hate
you. I actually think you do quite a bit to keep your cousin sane.
If you died, he might become even more psychotic.”

Miles nodded his understanding and wondered
if Roger planned to give Craig the antidote to the poison or let
him die. Likely he’d let Craig live because he was useful.

“If you don’t want to be injected, I won’t do
it,” Craig said.

Miles let out a sad laugh. “It’s too late to
start thinking for myself now. I could have made a difference years
ago. Now, it’s time to move on to the next sin. Do you think I’ll
lose my mind? I’m not sure if I’m afraid of that or hoping it
happens.”

“There’s only a small risk,” Craig assured
him. “We’ll start blood transfusions right after we inject you with
the virus. That should prevent any cell death or loss of oxygen to
the brain. We suspect both of those cause the insanity during the
change. I won’t lie to you; we really aren’t completely sure that’s
what causes it.”

Miles nodded. “You don’t really know if I’ll
lose my mind.”

Craig hesitated and shook his head. “There’s
no guarantee with this new virus. We don’t really know how it will
react in your system because of the treatments you’ve been
taking.”

“Maybe it would be best if I lost my mind.
Maybe my memory and my guilt will go with it. I’m too much of a
coward to ever do the right thing.”

Then the needle entered his vein, and he
realized that wanting to lose his mind was his biggest act of
cowardice, even worse than just standing back and letting bad
things happen. Now, he wanted to stop caring. He wanted to stop
feeling the guilt.

His eyes closed, and he pictured a sweet
little blonde girl skipping across the old settlement on the
island. So innocent and happy. The little girl had seen some older
kids bullying a little boy. She was a tiny thing, and she’d jumped
right in to help the little boy. Overpowered and outnumbered, she’d
shown no fear. Even knowing she wouldn’t win, she’d fought for what
was right.

His lips curled up into his first genuine
smile in months. Just the thought of the little girl he’d watched
grow into womanhood made him happy. She was everything he’d never
be. For days on end he would watch her, but she’d never even
noticed him. His power hadn’t impressed her. Perhaps when she saw
him, his evil stood out too much.

Now, she would never want him. Not that he’d
ever had a chance with someone like her anyway. The black stains on
his soul would seep through and destroy her.

His back arched as the virus quickly
decimated the cells in his body. This wasn’t like the original
virus. The new virus attacked the body within seconds of
exposure.

“Try to stay still while I set up the
transfusion,” Craig said.

“The pain is too much,” Miles said through
his teeth. Yes, he was a coward. He deserved more than this pain,
but he couldn’t embrace it. Fire raced through his veins. When he
licked his dry lips, he tasted his own salty tears. “Am I dying?”
he panted out.

“You’re doing just fine,” Craig said in a
calm voice.

“I’m so hot,” he said.

“Don’t worry; it will pass soon.”

The blood hit his veins like cold water
chasing the flames inside of him. With a sigh of relief the fire
receded. While his muscles were still cramping, the pain was
bearable. Sadly his memories continued to play in a loop.

Layla was relieved when Norah stopped by her
home early that afternoon. Muriel, Shelby and Carla weren’t far
behind her. Gathered in Layla’s living room, they were all watching
her pace and eat cookies. Layla had seriously never been this
hungry. All she wanted to do was eat. Okay, that wasn’t all she
wanted to do, but getting out of her house or having wild sex
weren’t options at the moment.

Muriel had brought Cole, and he was nibbling
on a muffin. Watching a baby vampire try to manage solid foods was
a little scary. Every time he took a bite, his fangs looked like
they were going to put a hole through his lip. Cole was a cute
baby! He looked just like Jack. When she’d taken care of him for an
afternoon all she could think about was how much work he was. While
Muriel dealt with the diapers, drool, and fangs, Layla only thought
about how adorable Cole was.

“Did anyone tell you the news?” Muriel asked.
Her innocent brown eyes alight with excitement.

“What news?” Layla was pretty sure she could
guess the news after having to hold Cole so Muriel could throw up
as soon as she’d arrived. Muriel’s belly also seemed rounder and
her hips seemed wider.

Muriel beamed. “I’m pregnant again. This time
Dr. Moon is sure the virus will work completely.”

Layla felt the strangest sense of dread,
jealousy, and excitement. This was something her friend really
wanted, but Layla knew the risks of being turned. She’d also grown
up fearing vampires and still had a hard time thinking of becoming
a vampire as a positive thing. The jealousy was the crazy part. Her
womb practically cried out in that moment. That was insane because
she’d never wanted children. Despite Cole’s undeniable cuteness,
she didn’t even babysit for Muriel when she could avoid it.

“Congratulations,” Layla said with a warm
smile. “I guess this means Cole is finally sleeping through the
night.” Jack and Muriel had traded off on sleeping for months
because of Cole’s poor sleeping habits, which were apparently
perfectly normal for vampire babies.

Muriel laughed. “Yes, I’m no longer too
exhausted to even consider another one. Thank you for reminding me
of the months of sleepless nights I’m going to have soon.”

“Hopefully, I won’t have to deliver this
one,” Norah said.

Muriel reached out and squeezed Norah’s hand.
“I wouldn’t mind too much. Maybe you should consider doing that for
a living. You were very calm and made things much easier for
me.”

“I’m happy with what I’m doing,” Norah said.
“It’s much less gory than delivering babies.” Then she gave a sad
smile. “Although Rand would love it if I delivered babies instead
of going out on patrol.

“Have you talked to him since the incident?”
Carla asked.

“That jackass should still be apologizing,”
Shelby added.

“I’m avoiding him,” Norah admitted. “We had
some really great sex and he apologized, but I can tell the fight
isn’t really over yet.”

“What happened?” Layla asked and then
listened to the story of Rand’s outburst. Rand was normally very
calm, so his behavior came as a surprise.

“I’m sorry Jack set this off by announcing my
pregnancy,” Muriel said.

“It’s not your fault,” Norah assured her. “He
just can’t get over the fact that I didn’t stay in some frozen
state while he was gone. Thinking my husband had been killed
changed me. Well, it happened mostly after I met Raven. Did he just
think my life would be the same when he got back?” Norah asked in
exasperation.

“Yes,” Carla said. “Rand spent his time away
from you fantasizing about coming back to the woman he
married.”

Norah cringed. “Instead he came back to a
woman he never would have wanted to marry in the first place.”

“And here I thought I was the overly blunt
one,” Shelby mumbled. “Don’t listen to Carla. She’s obviously
having a bitch moment.”

“What?” Carla asked. “Should I lie? I’m not
saying Rand won’t get used to the new you, but he needs time.”

“It’s been six months,” Norah complained.
“All he does is talk about getting me pregnant. At first, we were
okay, but the last couple of months I feel like he just wants
things exactly like they used to be with us planning a baby. I just
got him back, and all I want is to enjoy our time together. ”

“And go out on patrol,” Shelby added.

“And train to fight,” added Carla.

Norah flushed. “It just feels good knowing
I’m not helpless.”

The other women all nodded their agreement.
Layla hadn’t known Norah before Rand’s return. Raven had taught
Norah how to fight when Norah believed Rand was dead. Before that,
Norah had been more timid. Layla got the impression Rand didn’t
know what to think about his wife’s new found confidence. She’d
seen Rand watching Norah train, and it obviously turned him on.
She’d also seen Rand when Norah went out of the settlement with
other teams. They never sent Norah out with Rand because he spent
the whole time worrying about her, and his focus was off. Still, he
worried about her the entire time she was away. Layla suspected
Norah had the same worries when Rand went out on patrol.

“I totally get why you want to be able to
defend yourself,” Layla said. “I also get Rand’s point on this.”
Layla trained with Rand a lot, and she knew he still suffered from
his time in captivity. “He was taken away from you, and he’s
terrified that you’ll be taken from him. Rand knows how cruel the
humans who took him can be, and he’s afraid of what they might do
to you.”

Norah collapsed onto the couch. “I know, and
I hate making him worry.”

“But you can’t go back to being like you were
before,” Shelby finished for her.

“That pretty much sums it up,” Norah said. “I
do want to have a baby eventually, but for now I need to do this.
This may sound selfish, but I also don’t want to be trading off on
sleep. I like having my time alone with Rand, and I don’t care if
that’s selfish.” After a long pause she added, “I’m also afraid to
go home because I don’t want to start fighting again. Everything
was so good after we made up. When he left for his patrol this
morning he was on edge, and I’m afraid we’ll start fighting again
as soon as I see him.”

Layla knew right away that Rand was at her
house. His tentative knock was always funny. He was a giant of a
man but tried hard to be gentle. She started to stand up, but
Shelby caught her arm. “You’d better let Norah get that. In fact,
it might be best if you hide in the other room.”

“Sorry about coming over here and complaining
about my problems,” Norah said with an apologetic smile. “I’m
supposed to be helping you.”

Layla waved off her concern. “Nah, it was a
great distraction. Answer the door before Rand knocks any
harder.”

Hiding in the kitchen was an annoying pain in
the ass. She didn’t want to hide, especially not from Rand. They
were friends, and now she had to avoid him.

Shelby followed her in with a handful of
muffin crumbs. Cole was a messy eater. “You’re going stir crazy,
right?”

“More than I expected,” Layla admitted. It
was actually an understatement. If she didn’t get out soon, she was
going to lose it.

“There’s a meeting this evening,” Shelby
said. “Well, it’s scheduled for the morning, but I’ll get Si to
reschedule it. I’m going to talk to Simon about you going out on
patrol with me and Carla tomorrow.”

“That would be great!” Layla said. “Will
Simon go for it?”

Shelby gave her an annoyed look. “Simon may
be filling in for Connor, but he’s only in charge to an extent. If
I can convince the others that you should go out with us, Si won’t
have a choice. I’ll suggest that he doesn’t go with our group so he
won’t have an opportunity to stick his foot in his mouth.”

Layla threw her arms around Shelby. “Thank
you!”

“No need to thank me,” Shelby said. “I lived
the first part of my life trapped in one place. I value freedom too
much to take it away from you for something you have no control
over.”