Endlessly (Paranormalcy) (14 page)

“Are you okay?” I whispered.

He looked at me and something—something was off. Something was not quite right underneath his glamour. Silently, he held out his other hand to Raquel as a door appeared on the wall in front of us and we walked out of the Center for what I very, very much hoped would be the last time.

W
e
came through at the edge of the trees by Lend’s house. Reth stumbled forward, leaning against a tree for support, his golden glow dampened. Was it really just yesterday I’d come through with Lend, stumbling, while Reth was strong?

“What did she do?” I asked. I’d been too worried to talk in the Faerie Paths, terrified that Reth would collapse before we made it through and we’d be stuck there again. “Are you going to be okay?”

“I am better than you would be if she had hit her intended target.”

I shuddered, taking his hand in mine. Either I was way warmer or he was way colder; I found both options equally disturbing. I already felt weird, with a disconnected buzzing like I’d taken too much cold medicine or something. “I have to go in with Raquel and fix this curse. Why don’t you come in and…umm, lie down on the couch or something.”

Reth gave me a humorless smile. “In all our time with each other, have I ever struck you as the type to nap on a couch?”

I snickered. “Not really. But it would be entertaining for me, at least. I’ll bet you snore, even.”

He looked indignant. “What makes you think I even sleep?”

“Do you?”

“Not in the same way you do. Go and waste your time trying to ‘fix’ Lend. I will try my best not to die waiting.”

I took a step away, then turned back. “Wait, seriously? Are you going to die?”

He smiled, this time a genuine one. “I knew you cared. Not at the moment, but I will need you for something very soon.”

It felt horrible, abandoning Reth when he was so hurt and messed up. And I knew that I’d do whatever he needed me to if it meant helping him. Lend had to be my priority right now, though. We were heading directly into the middle of a massive paranormal storm, and everything
would change. I had to be able to really be with Lend
right now
, because right now was the only guarantee.

I nodded. “I won’t be long.” I turned toward Raquel, who was still standing in the same spot she had been when we came out of the Paths, a dazed expression on her face. “Raquel? You coming?”

“I honestly never thought I would see the light of day again.”

“Aww, come on. With me on your side? Of course things worked out.”

She tried to smile, but her eyes filled with tears. “Thank you, Evie.”

I threw my arms around her in a hug. “You don’t have to thank me.”

“I really do. You wonderful girl. I’ve missed you so much.”

“Well, now that we’re both unemployed fugitives, think of how much time we’ll have to hang out!”

She laughed drily, and we walked with our arms around each other to the house. I opened the door and yelled, “Evie alert! Coming into the family room!”

“You made it!” Lend shouted back. “Just a sec, I’ll go to the kitchen. Raquel’s with you?”

“Yup!”

“Good job! Jack and Arianna got back a couple of minutes ago.”

I walked into the family room to find Arianna and Jack
sitting on the couch, arguing. “But there would have been no point to you being there if it hadn’t been for my computer prowess.”

“But your computer prowess wouldn’t have mattered if you couldn’t have gotten into the Center in the first place.”

“Being a glorified taxi does not make you the bigger hero.”

“Being a nerd who can tap on a keyboard or being able to navigate the dark eternities of the Faerie Paths…hmmm…which is a rarer and more valuable skill…”

I put my hands on my hips. “Okay, kids, take it elsewhere. Raquel and I have work to do.”

“Evie,” Raquel said. She was staring at Jack in horror.

“Oh, that.” I waved a hand dismissively. “It’s all good. Jack’s been helping us.”

“Don’t you remember how he tried to kill you?”

Jack rolled his eyes. “Boring. We’ve all moved on.”

“Really?”

“Not really,” I said. “But he’s behaving. And everyone needs a glorified taxi now and then.”

“Admit it: you all adore me.” Jack bowed dramatically as he left the room. Arianna smiled tightly at Raquel and left after him.

Raquel collapsed onto the couch and closed her eyes. “You’re working with Reth and Jack? Have you lost your mind?”

“Oh, that happened ages ago. But I’ve had to do a lot of rescuing lately, and those two come in handy.”

“Do you trust them?”

“No, we don’t,” Lend called from the kitchen.

I smiled. “But, I don’t know, I think I’ve forgiven them. They’re both complete idiots, and sometimes they’re evil, but they always have a reason, you know? I don’t approve of them or trust them, but I understand them. I’ve done some things I’m not proud of, but at the time they felt utterly necessary. And I’d do them again.” I shuddered at the memory of the midnight faerie’s soul, tried not to feel the frosty spread of it through my veins, the distance it seemed to put between my body and me, even the room around me. “Anyway. Right now they’re on my side, and I’ll take whatever help I can get.”

“As long as you—”

“Raquel!” David said, running into the room. Raquel stood up to greet him and he swept her into his arms and—oh good heavens I never wanted to see anything like this in my life—he smashed his lips against hers.

“Dad?” Lend called from the kitchen. “What’s going on?”

“You don’t want to know!” I said, my voice high and strained.

They broke apart, gasping, and David held her at arm’s length, looking at her like he’d devour her. I didn’t know
whether to laugh or throw up.

I dug my toes into the carpet, staring at it. “So, uh, I saved Raquel.”

Raquel laughed, and David joined her. They sounded slightly manic. “You’re free now,” he said.

“Of all of it,” she answered, and I looked up to see them locked in a gaze I’d previously only observed between actors on
Easton Heights
—one filled with all the things unspoken over the years, all the betrayals and fears and pain left behind in favor of overwhelming love. It was beautiful.

Oh, who am I kidding, it was awkward as all heck and I didn’t have time for it. “Okay! So, you may have noticed Lend is in the kitchen.”

“Mmm hmm,” Raquel answered, reaching up to smooth down a stray piece of David’s hair.

“Yeah, that’d be the big faerie curse.”

“Faerie curse?” She actually turned toward me; David took both her hands in his.

“Yup. Really funny one, too. See, any time Lend and I are in the same room or can see each other or could actually, you know, touch, he falls fast asleep.”

“Oh.” Raquel frowned.

“So I need your help. You know all the names of the IPCA controlled faeries, right?”

She nodded, her frown deepening.

“Well, it was a dark faerie curse, so I figure we need
a dark faerie to undo it. So you call an Unseelie faerie, we give him or her a named command to break the curse, ta-da, we can double-date!”

“Wait, who can double-date?” Lend asked.

“I’ll let your dad tell you. So. Faerie?”

Raquel heaved a sigh, along the lines of her famous
things never get easier, do they?
sigh, and, boy, I agreed with her.

“To be honest, I don’t know which court most of the faeries belong to.”

“You don’t? How can you not know? It seems like pretty vital information to me. You know, ‘Are you a member of the evil court kidnapping humans and plotting world domination, or a member of the moderately less evil court who just wants to get the crap off the planet?’ sort of a survey when you get them.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to get information of any type at all from a faerie? Figuring out which court they belonged to was never a very high priority as long as we could control them.”

“Gah! IPCA keeps coming up with new ways to massively fail me. But you said you didn’t know which court
most
of the faeries belonged to. Do you know any?”

She nodded, reluctant. “Yes, there’s one I know for certain is from the Dark Court.”

“Great! Let’s call him.”

“Her. You know her, too. Fehl.”

Ah, bleep. Of course. The one faerie Vivian had mostly
drained, who was now running around the Faerie Realms, feral and twisted. Also the one faerie I’d commanded never to come near me again.

“There has to be someone else.” I didn’t even know if Fehl had enough strength to make it to Earth anymore.

Raquel paused, deep in thought, then nodded. “There’s another I’m fairly certain is Unseelie. I’m not positive, though.”

“I’ll take it!”

“We’ll have to manage this very carefully, Evie. From what I saw, it would appear that entire court wants you dead.”

“Yeah, well, you know. Stopping their custom-made Empty One, stabbing their queen in the neck, breaking their mirror forest, I’m not really Miss Popularity there.”

“Stabbing—You what?”

“Long story. Faerie? I’d really like to hang out with my boyfriend while he’s, you know, conscious.”

“Seconded,” Lend shouted.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to invite an Unseelie faerie here?”

“We’re very well protected,” David said. “There’s pretty much every elemental you can think of hanging out around the house, and Cresseda has put up numerous safety measures.”

“Very well,” Raquel said. She didn’t even blanche at Cresseda’s name. David’s fingers laced through hers probably
had something to do with her newfound grace regarding the elemental who stole David from her. “Althenam.”

We all waited, barely daring to breathe, until a line of white light traced itself along the wall. A faerie, long and tall and beautiful with hair as orange as fire, stepped through, her eyes widening as she saw me.

Raquel said her name again, and she snapped her attention (and vicious glare) toward my former boss. “In the kitchen is a boy under a faerie curse. Undo it without harming him, then wait for further orders.”

I had to hand it to Raquel—she had the whole named command thing down. I tended to suck hard-core at it.

I bounced nervously on my toes as Raquel and the faerie went into the kitchen. I’d be able to hug Lend soon! And hold hands! And make out like crazy! And then figure out how to help Reth with whatever that faerie did to him. And then figure out how to deal with whether or not to open the gates, and how. But still!

After what felt like an eternity I heard the faerie speak again. “I cannot undo it.”

“Are you Unseelie?” Raquel asked.

“Yes,” the faerie hissed. “But this curse is not a pattern I can weave or unweave.”

“Very well,” Raquel said, and then she sighed, a sigh of defeat. I slumped onto the couch. “Althenam, leave this place, never return, and reveal its location and occupants to no one.” She paused. “And never return to IPCA
or answer their calls again.”

I couldn’t hear the faerie door, but there seemed to be a certain shift of energy, like that vaguely disturbing silence that settles in when the power shuts off, signaling the faerie was gone.

As were all my hopes.

W
e’ll
figure something else out.” Lend’s voice was soft and barely loud enough for me to hear from around the corner. Raquel had run outside with David, already shouting the names of every faerie under IPCA control. I had to hand it to her—I hadn’t even thought to use her to free them from IPCA. It didn’t mean Anne-Whatever Whatever wouldn’t have faerie help from the Unseelies, but it would sure make her life harder. I didn’t have the energy to follow them, instead slumping against the wall to the kitchen.

“What if—” I stopped, swallowing hard. Nope. I couldn’t even say it aloud. We’d figure something else out
because we had to. Time for a subject change before I lost it. “What did your mom say?”

“Mostly that she thinks my hair is getting too long and I should cut it.”

“That’s not helpful.”

“That’s my mom for you.” He was trying for humor but his voice caught, and I wondered if he was thinking about how if she left and he didn’t, he’d never ever see her again.

“So,” I said, sitting on the floor against the wall as close to the kitchen doorway as I could get without Lend dropping like a rock, “do you want your Christmas present?”

“You got me something?” He sounded surprised.

“I’ve been working on it for a while.”

“I, uh, didn’t find you anything yet. I was actually setting up for your party, not Christmas shopping like I said.”

“Being kidnapped by the Dark Queen and then cursed gets you off the hook for a lot. Besides, my birthday party totally counted.”

“This isn’t how I wanted our first Christmas to go. We were going to go all out, pick out a Christmas tree on Christmas Eve, decorate it, watch cheesy holiday movies, drink hot chocolate, let my dad make his eggnog and then complain about how disgusting it was, then I was going to deck out my entire room in mistletoe…”

“Wait, you mean you didn’t plan for us to be stuck in different rooms for the holidays?”

“Well, that part’s kind of nice.” I heard his head bang
against the wall where he was sitting right on the other side of it from me. “I mean, who wants to actually be able to touch their super hot girlfriend? Overrated.”

“I know, right?” I tried to laugh, but it came out choked. I swallowed, forcing my tone to come out light. “And I totally dig watching people sleep. It’s so sexy.”

We were both quiet for a bit. With my last brilliant idea a failure, the reality that maybe we could never fix this hung like a chain around my neck, cutting off the air. I’d fought so hard to get—really get—Lend. From escaping the Center to stopping Vivian to overcoming my own stupid issues, I’d been fighting for this relationship since the day I first saw his water eyes. I couldn’t have come this far just to lose him physically forever. It wasn’t fair. And I was sick and tired of things not being fair.

“So, where’s my present?”

I wiped under my eyes. “Oh, right. You have your laptop in there?”

“Yeah.”

Smiling, I grabbed my laptop off the coffee table and emailed him the link, then waited.

“Ooh, I’ve got mail.” After a few seconds I heard the video playing, and Lend laughed. “How long did this take you?”

“I had a lot of time on my hands while you were in finals.” I leaned my head against the wall as I heard the soundtrack to the clips. I’d gone through all four seasons
of
Easton Heights
and found every single time any of the characters said “I love you,” then (with copious amounts of help from Arianna) pieced them all together back to back to back, with one of Lend’s favorite songs as the soundtrack.

“I love you!” “I
love
you.” “I LOVE YOU, idiot!” “You are so—I hate you! I love you!” “Shut up and tell me you love me.”
“Te amo!”
Ah, yes, the guest arc of the Spanish hottie. That was a good season.

Given the number of relationships that show cycled through, the video lasted several minutes. When it ended, I heard Lend’s laptop closing.

“Well?” I asked.

“I love you,” he answered.

“I love you, too.” I put my palm against the wall, fingers splayed out. I would fix this. I didn’t care if IPCA was taking over the world, or dark forces were conspiring to keep us apart, or if in opening the gate to another world I’d maybe die or Lend would leave this world forever. He was mine, no matter what I had to do to make it work.

“Umm, so, what was that you were saying when my dad and Raquel were in here? About double-dating?”

I rubbed my eyes. “You should really ask your dad about it.”

“I don’t want to ask my dad about it, I’m asking you.”

“Your dad and Raquel are—were—well, they were
really
happy to be back together. Like, together together. I found some pictures in Raquel’s room and I think we’ve
solved the mystery of what the deal was between them. I think they were engaged or something before your dad met your mom. And, uh, they’ve rekindled the spark.”

Lend was quiet for a long time. Too long.

“Are you okay?”

“He’s still married.”

“What?”

“My dad. Is still. Married. To
my mom
.”

I hadn’t even thought of that, although I guess it would be difficult to sign a divorce agreement if your hands were made of water. “Yeah, but they haven’t really been with each other in eighteen years.”

“She’s my mom, Evie. And what, now that she’s going to leave the planet he’s suddenly jumping all over a woman who stands for everything he and I have fought against?”

“Whoa now. You heard. Raquel’s not IPCA anymore. And she’s never been as bad as you make her out to be.”

“Sure, because stealing my dad is really cool.”

“Who is she stealing him from? Your mom left him forever ago, and I’m pretty sure she stole David from Raquel in the first place!”

“What is
that
supposed to mean? I wouldn’t exist if my parents hadn’t loved each other!”

I looked up at the ceiling, breathing deeply. “That came out really, really wrong. Of course I’m glad your parents fell in love. They made the best thing in the entire world. And it is really weird that your dad and Raquel might be dating
now. You have every right to be freaked out. Just, please, give her a chance, okay?”

He didn’t answer. I could feel knots forming in my shoulders and neck. It was like my whole body was ganging up on me because it hated not being touched by Lend. Subject change time. “Did you find anything else out while I was gone?”

His voice was still terse. “Not much new, although it’s getting crowded out there. They’re gathering paranormals from all over. Everyone who wants to leave.”

“So they’re taking it for granted that they’ll actually have a gate?”

There was a pause. “I thought—I thought you were going to try to open the gate. Not that I want to push you, but…I don’t know, I think it’s the right thing to do.”

I scowled up at the ceiling, picking at the rug under my fingers. “Well, yeah, it probably is, but it pisses me off that they’re just assuming I will.”

Lend laughed, the sound making some of the tension in my shoulders relax. “Yeah, that’s paranormals for you. Always bossing people around. Prophecies this, prophecies that.”

“And do any of their prophecies say please? No, not a single one.” I rolled over onto my side, my nose practically touching the wall, and put my hand against the wallpaper. Amid the dry, static wind of the sylph’s soul; the manic, buzzing energy of the vampire’s; the fluid motion of the
fossegrim’s; and the horrible, cracking, burning frost of the faerie’s, I tried to sense my own soul, tried to find that part of my core that was me and only me. But how could I find it when I didn’t know what it felt like unless I was touching Lend?

I sighed. “I’m scared. Of it all. Of what will happen if I don’t try to open the gate, yeah, but even more of what might happen if I do. Not only do I have no idea how to do it, but the last one I opened…I really thought I was going to die. Everything went rushing out of me so quickly and if it hadn’t been for Lish’s soul signaling me to stop, I don’t think I would have been able to close the gate, or to stop my own soul from flying out, too. I might want to help the paranormals, but I’m not willing to give up my soul for it.”

“Of course not! No one can ask you to do that. No one should. If you decide to do this—and I mean you decide, not anyone else—then we’ll figure out how to make it work so you come out safe and sound. Besides, I wouldn’t let you sacrifice your own soul. It’s mine.”

“Uh, I think you mean my
heart
is yours. That’s a little more romantic and less stalker creepy.”

“Well, regardless, you know mine is yours, right? Heart, soul, whatever. It’s all yours.”

I smiled and buried my face in the carpet so my cheek was resting against the cool wall. “I know.”

After a few quiet minutes during which I nearly fell asleep, Lend spoke again, his words soft but shaking me to
my core. “What if we can never fix this?”

“What?”

“This stupid thing keeping us apart. What if we can’t break it? Because I’m not going to accept a life where I can’t touch you.”

“I don’t know what else to do, besides hitting up the Light Queen for help. And I really don’t want to.”

“It just doesn’t make any sense! I’ve been thinking about it—I haven’t been thinking about anything else—and why would the Dark Queen do this? I mean, why curse me so that I can’t physically be near you? It seems so…childish, you know? Like, if she didn’t want me to escape or she wanted to punish me if I managed to, why not curse me to die? Or to never wake up at all?”

I frowned, sitting up. “I hadn’t thought about it that way. I kind of thought it was a genius evil curse, but with what we know about her, it does seem sort of silly.”

“She didn’t strike me as much of a prankster in the short but overwhelmingly terrifying time we spent together. Epically cruel, sure. Cleverly mean, not so much.”

“Not being able to talk to you face-to-face and touch you is pretty epically cruel, Lend.”

His voice came out tortured. “I know. But still.”

“Yeah. Maybe she couldn’t just kill you? Because of, I don’t know, your mom?”

“Maybe.”

“I should ask Reth about…oh, crap!” I was the worst
person ever. I stood up. “I totally forgot about Reth.”

“What about him?”

“He got hurt. A faerie tried to attack me, but he pushed me out of the way and it hit him instead. He seemed pretty bad off.”

“How did you get away, then?”

I rolled my eyes in aggravation and glared at the ceiling, hating what I had to confess. Lend knew how much it affected me, taking souls, and I always felt guilty and dirty, like he was judging me even though he tried not to. “The faerie came after me when Reth was down and I sucked out some of her soul.”

“Good.”

“I—Good?”

“Yes. Good.”

I shuddered. “You don’t have the creepy, icy thing in you. It’s not good.”

“You here, safe and alive? Good.”

I smiled sadly and knocked on the wall three times. “I”—knock—“love”—knock—“you”—knock.

He knocked three times back.

I wavered, then blurted out, “Will you go through if I open the gate?”

“No,” he said, but there were a few seconds of hesitation before it slipped out, and those few seconds filled me with dread and loneliness so deep it was colder even than the midnight faerie’s soul. He didn’t know.

He knocked on the wall again. “Go check on Reth. But be careful. I haven’t slept on purpose in way too long, so I’m going to bed. And since I’ll be asleep anyway, come sleep next to me when you get back in, okay?”

I forced my voice to come out light and teasing. “Only if you’re wearing footie pajamas.”

He laughed. “I’ll see if I can find a pair. See you soon.”

“No, you won’t,” I whispered too softly for him to hear, then walked out the front door toward the trees. It was dark now, and bitterly cold. I had no idea how many hours I’d been awake at this point—the last time I remembered sleeping was on the couch just after saving Lend. I was so tired I wished I were the one who’d drop instantly to sleep, because then I’d “accidentally” walk into the room with Lend and have a perfect excuse for not doing things I knew I should.

Alas. Miles to go before I sleep.

“Reth?” I called, wrapping my arms around myself and squinting into the darkness. The hairs on the back of my neck rose as I remembered being tased out here. In spite of what David said about protections, maybe I shouldn’t be here alone. “Reth?”

“He’s not here,” Arianna said, and I jumped and shrieked in fright. She was standing just past the tree line. I swallowed hard, disturbed. I could see her soul, glowing in the black night. I couldn’t usually see hers so brightly; I hadn’t been able to see any this clearly since the night I took all
the souls from Vivian. Just how much had I taken from the midnight faerie, anyway?

“Chill, Evie. You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Which, for the record, are way less cool than vampires. Reth’s with everyone, hanging out at the pond, being immortal and whatnot. It’s pretty rocking.”

Great. Exactly where I wanted to go right now. To the pond, with dragons and sylphs and selkies, oh my.

“Of course that’s where he’d be, because my night keeps getting awesomer. What are you doing out here?”

“You know. Hanging out. Being all immortal and whatnot.”

“Where’s Jack?”

“He went to the Faerie Realms to eat and sleep. Said he’d be back later.”

“I have to find Reth and make sure he’s okay. Come with me?”

“Now, now, you aren’t afraid of monsters in the dark, are you?” I caught a flash of her eyes, winking wickedly at me.

“No,” I said, shivering. After all, I was one of them.

I walked slower and slower as we got closer to the pond. I could see them already, bobbing and dancing and swirling through the night, all the lights of the souls there. The souls waiting for me to save them, to send them home.

Oh, bleep, I didn’t want any of this. I didn’t want this pressure, this weight on my shoulders. This whole mess had
nothing to do with me. But it seemed like no matter how hard I fought against being involved in paranormal drama, I kept getting sucked back in. I guess it was my birthright, the only thing left to me by my broken and gone mother and my broken and gone faerie father.