Endurance (Heart of Stone) (9 page)

He shook his head angrily, but I knew it was his way of
coping; his father was the same. “I can’t do this anymore, Mom. He’s…” His
voice broke as he pointed at Mason, “He’s dangerous. Everything within range of
him shrivels and dies, you included.”

“No, sweetheart,” I urged as I hurried towards him and
took his hands, gripping onto them too tightly but unable to let go. “No.”

“Yes,” he hissed as his fury surfaced. He grabbed at my
arms and spun me around until I was facing the mirror, his dark eyes looking
back at mine in the reflection. “Look at you. Look what he does.”

I tried to close my eyes but he shook me, “Mom, look at
yourself.”

“This wasn’t him, George. This was…”

“NO!” He bellowed in my ear, making me jump with the
severity of it. “This is the carnage he leaves in his wake. It’s not even the first
time; it’s not even the second or the third. It will never end and I can’t
stand here and watch you be destroyed. I can’t and won’t wait in the background
while
he
destroys you.”

“But...” I stuttered as I turned to him. “I can’t do this
without you George. You’re my son, my life and I’m nothing without you.”

“Then come with me. Leave him.”

“Wh…what?”

Everything was going wrong. Everything I had built up
since moving here was falling around me, the shelter and defence I had
struggled to erect for my family was crumbling around me and burying me under
its rubble.

I turned to Mason, angry that he was just stood silent,
angry that this was all his fault, angry that he was letting this happen and
wasn’t doing anything to stop it. “Please, Mom. Come with me. Start again, a
fresh life, free from his fucking dodgy shit and his extreme ability to ruin
everything, you included.”

Mason continued to stare at me, expressionless and stoic
as my son begged me to leave his father and start a new life with him. Visions of
the last eighteen years ripped me apart; Mason’s torturous drug habit, his
addiction to whores and women, his dominant rule; Dane’s cruelty and
persecution, the rapes and beatings, the slice of excruciating agony when the
poker seared my back. Rebecca’s taunting smirks, ridiculing me, her evil face
mocking me as she ran her hand across Mason’s arm, her sneer as she wrapped her
arms around his neck and broke my heart. Then finally, Kade’s loving eyes, the
warmth and adoration on his face and the way he would make love to me.

I turned back to George and smiled sadly, “No.”

He swallowed and the sight of devastation on his face
tore my heart into pieces. “Whatever you think of your father, I love him and I
know without a shadow of a doubt that he would use his last breath to protect
me. Life is life, George and one day I hope you’ll understand why I’m doing
this but I love your father with everything I am. He is me… and I am him. We’re
one; we share the same breath, the same air and the same soul. You will never
know the extent of what he has done for me, and I never want you to know, there
are some things that shouldn’t be shared with your children.”

“Oh, believe me, I know.”

I palmed his cheek softly and shook my head, “No George,
you don’t. You have no idea what he pulled me through. He forced me through the
gates of hell and taught me to keep fighting until I reached the other end, and
until you have experienced life, I don’t expect you to understand. But I need
you to know, although I’m not coming with you, I love you so much it hurts. You
gave life to me as I gave it to you, you gave me hope and happiness and for
that, you will forever be in my heart. But I can’t and won’t leave your father,
I will never leave him until the heavens decide it’s our time and even then I know
he’ll be behind me, holding my hand and following me through.”

The tears he shed shredded any strength I had left but I locked
my knees and stood firm, not allowing him to see how much more painful this was
than anything Mason had ever done before. My husband could be cruel and
merciless but I knew with my very soul that he would never abandon me.

But now George had to experience life to understand it
and I wouldn’t be the one to hold him back. I couldn’t force him to stay and I wouldn’t.
I knew he needed to do this as much as I needed air to live.

He nodded then bent to pick up his case, “I’ll be with Uncle
Nate and Aunt Liv if you need to get hold of me.”

I returned his nod, holding his gaze determinedly but he
finally broke and dropped his case, his arms curling around me as he press me
so tight I was scared for my ribs. “Christ Mom, I…” His sobs swallowed his
words but I held onto him with as much strength as I could find. “I love you,”
he whispered as he pulled away and walked from the room, the sound of the front
door closing too loud for the delicate air around me.

I stood silent, my knees trembling and threatening to admit
defeat as my soul shrank and wept.

“Baby,” Mason whispered behind me.

 I hadn’t realised we were alone and wondered how long I had
been stood there. I turned to him, the pain on his face as agonising as the
shredding of my heart. “I’m so sorry, Ava. I…”

He dropped to his knees before me and sobbed, his
wretched cries tearing at the final strands of my heart as I fell before him
and wrapped him up, “Ssshhh, baby.”

“I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry…” he repeated over and over
until his throat became too dry and he began to rasp. Both the men in my life
had finally and ultimately destroyed me, shattered my soul and defeated me.

Vickie said my family was my strength but I begged to
differ. Nobody, not even Vickie, could estimate how much my family broke me,
how much they took from me and how much they crushed me.

But, as my soul splintered, my spirit kicked in and fought
back. My heart punched me in the guts and declared its vitality with another
beat and my armour strengthened yet again and demanded that I get to my feet
and live another day.

“He’ll be okay, Mason. I promise.”

He nodded eagerly against me, his tears drenching me and his
pain engulfing me as I pulled him closer and devoured it all from him.

Once again, my glorious bastard fed the warrior in me and
I knew we would make it through.

Endurance was underestimated.

The End