Entangled (12 page)

The ride back is quiet too, it’s unnerving. Usually I’m blasting my music but I don’t know what kind of music she likes and I’m not sure I want to ask. I roll my window down and drive with the hot air blowing inside, but it’s the noise that calms my nerves and helps ease the tension in the car.

We get to the apartment, I get out and this time I don’t open her door. I walk away, grab the paint and wait for her to get out. She quickly takes the hint and gets out herself. Now I feel like an ass but I don’t want to lead her on.

We walk inside and I open my bedroom door. “I’m going to put on some old shorts. Do you want to wear something of mine to paint in?”

“Oh, no I’m fine but thanks.” I sigh in relief because the thought of seeing her in my clothes is too much. It’s bad enough I have to see her in her own. Her lean, tanned legs fit perfectly in her denim shorts and her ass has just enough bubble to make a guy want to rub it. I enter my bedroom, close the door and find some old black workout pants to change into instead. Okay, I can do this. I’m just painting my wall with a friend. That’s it. I give myself a pep talk before going back out there.

“Which color did you want this room?” Maddy asks when I approach her. Her hair is pulled back into a pony tail. I bought a couple different color paints.

“I don’t know, I like the beige. But I also like the brown. What do you think?”

“I think the light brown would be warm. And your couches are brown so it would look good together.”

“True, it’d definitely give off a welcoming feeling.” She hands me a paint brush, our hands barely make contact and it startles me. I try to shake it off, as if it didn’t faze me. “Okay, let’s get started.”

“You take that wall. I’ll take this one.”  I walk to the wall closest to the door. “Wait,” She starts, “Do you have a boom box?”

I raise an eye brow in amusement. Who has those anymore? “A boom box, really?”

“Yeah, Andi and I always listened to music while we painted.”

“How often did you paint anyway?” I’m curious.

“We painted many weekends in middle and high school. It was something that helped me to relax and forget about my problems.” She confesses.

“I’m sorry. It seems we all have problems. God knows I have a lot.” I pick up the remote from the coffee table and find the music channel, but before deciding which one to select, I give her a look, asking to help me. “I listen to everything but country.”

“Thank God.” I smile and choose the rock station. We need something upbeat to keep us in the painting mood. “Wait,” a thought crosses my mind, “You’ve lived in the country all your life and you never listened to it?”

“I’ve listened to it, but I don’t like it. It’s all too depressing.” I agree. Every song is about a break up, or make up or everything to do with love and it just gets annoying.

We get to work, brushing and stroking, up and down in comfortable silence. I peak at Maddy and watch her swaying her hips to a song I’ve never heard of. I smile to myself and mind my own business. There’s a wall that needs to be painted so I do just that. I dip, I paint, I repeat. Oh and I sneak glances behind me at Maddy every once in a while. She’s preoccupied to notice me. But her paintjob is much better than mine.

It takes an hour or so to get it done, but it goes by quickly. I admire her handy work. “It looks really good.”

“Thanks. I’ve had a lot of experience. I love that color.”

“Yes, I agree. The room is more inviting and friendly. Thank you so much for offering to do this. I’ve never had a girl paint my walls before. But I had fun doing it. With you. Not like that. We weren’t doing anything but that was fun. I had fun. And now I’m rambling. I’m gonna get a drink, do you want anything?” I’ll take morphine or liquor, just shut me up.

We sit on the sofa with our drinks. I look around and feel satisfied, although you could see the job that I did compared to her side. Either way, it looks good by my standards. It’s not as if I have any friends to show off the place too anyway, except maybe Spence, but he doesn’t give a shit what color the walls are painted or if I have carpet. “So why don’t you have pictures of your family?”

My eyes drift over her curious face.  I can’t get over how long and dark her eye lashes are. They’re beautiful. I swallow my words before I say something stupid again and take a sip of my drink, needing to find some dignity in there.

“I don’t talk about them. My parents suck and I don’t need pictures to remind me of how bad shit used to be. I have to carry it around in here,” I put my finger to my head, “All the damn time, every damn day.”

“I’m sorry. I know what it’s like to have bad memories.” Before I can reply, her phones beeps and she pulls it out of her pocket. I look away so I don’t appear nosey. She looks at it and pushes buttons, texting, I assume. Then she looks at me and stands up. “Listen, I gotta go. A few of us are going to Midnight Bar tonight for karaoke. You should come and hang out, have some drinks.”

Say yes, say yes, say yes.
“Oh, thanks for the invite but I think I’m going to just stay in tonight.”
You pussy.
She sets her glass in the sink and grabs her purse. I see disappointment in her face and I want to change my mind, but I don’t.

I finally get off the couch and walk her to the door. We step outside, I have no idea where she parked so I just wait for her to tell me which way. “Well, it was fun. Maybe next time we can paint another room.”

“I’ll order pizza too.” I add. She nods and her hair bounces around her face. “Okay, well I guess I’ll see you later.” She turns and I follow.

“Where’s your car?”

“I walked here. I’m fine. You go enjoy your new room.”

“Maddy,” She turns to face me, I scratch my chin not because of an itch but I just need to keep my hands busy before I grab her hair in a bunch. It’s driving me crazy, her hair, and this girl. What the fuck? “Thanks for coming over. Have a good night with your friends.”

“Thanks, Noah. Have a good night too.” She smiles and walks away. I walk back inside my apartment and sit on the couch. Once again, I’m alone and all I can think is why I didn’t just go have fun. But it’s simple, I’m a pansy.

Maddy

Feeling a little deflated on the walk home, I take the long way. I need to think. First of all, my drop in went better than I expected, and I can’t wipe the grin that’s plastered on my face when an image of Noah floats in my mind. Who offers to paint a room? I mean, unless it’s with your best friend. But at least he didn’t find my impulsive idea to be too ridiculous, weird maybe and that’s okay. I am weird, not normal in the least. I’ll take it.

But then, after watching him paint, flexing his muscles was pretty hot. I had to keep myself busy just to keep from ogling his backside. So I was glad he had music on to dance to. It made it more fun. But I wondered if he was checking me out too. Let’s face it, he’s attractive. I like him. Being around him is a mystery but each new fact I learn about him makes me like him more. But more than that, I see that he’s more like me. We’re both from broken homes, we’re both alone and miserable and we’re both just trying to search for something better. It’s obvious he needs a friend and I understand him the way others don’t. I’m sure if Andi knew more about him, she’d be less compelled to judge him. I just want him aware that he’s not alone. This world is full of people like him and me but he doesn’t have to deal with life on his own.

I stop short in front of my apartment and pull out my key to get in. Andi is sitting on the couch, watching TV, dressed. “Well hello, roomie.” I sit next to her and lean back.

“Hi. What’s the plan?”

“We’re going to drink and have some fun. What else?” Oh silly me for thinking it would be different than any other night.

“Have you heard from your parents? How’s your dad feeling?”

“I don’t know. I think he had the flu or something. Glad we didn’t go over there. That is the last thing I want to catch.” I can’t shake the feeling there’s more to it. But I don’t want to worry Andi if it’s nothing. “So what were you doing?”

“I was,” I plan to drag it out, make her squirm until she can’t take the anticipation. It’ll bug her but I know when she learns I was hanging out with Noah, she’ll lecture me about him being untrustworthy and a player and out to break my fragile heart, blah blah blah. I appreciate her looking out for me but it’s getting old.  I’m an adult and have been through worse. A little heartbreak might do me some good. Not that I encourage it. But we can all learn from it and it only makes us stronger. Well, some of us anyway.

“What were you doing? Quit stalling, woman.” I laugh.

“Fine, I was at Noah’s. Painting. His living room.” She quirks an eye brow in surprise. “Really? He went for that? Wow.”

“Yeah, well it was fun. And then I invited him to Midnight’s and he declined.” I sound disappointed but it doesn’t mean anything. Maybe he was just tired. I put on my best smile, ready for a fun night. I need a drink or two.

“Oh, Maddy. I’m sorry. See, you paint a guy’s wall and he’s like “okay, that’s all. We’re done, until I can find something else for you to do” and I mean, come on! Why would he pass up an opportunity to hang out with you? What an idiot.”

“Okay, it’s fine. We had a great time. We’re friends, it’s no big deal. He’s not obligated to hang out with me. Quit finding reasons to dislike him even more. Gah.” I get up and retreat to my bedroom before she can respond to my outrage, though it was a minor disagreement but still.

“You like him, don’t you?” She peeks her head in. I sit at the edge of my bed, deciding if I want to wear a dress or go casual. She walks in and leans against the wall.

“I don’t know. Part of me thinks I could. I can’t stop thinking about him. It’s like when we’re together, he’s a different person. I see a side no one else does. Almost to the point of me reaching him, opening him up. But then he closes himself off again and I’m right back where I started.” I throw myself back onto my bed. “Ugh, guys are so confusing.”

“Why do you think I don’t want a serious relationship? They say one thing but always mean the complete opposite. They mindfuck us to get their way. I’d say to hell with that. I’m happy being single right now. I’m happy just playing the field.” I look at her and laugh.

“You haven’t “played the field” in quite some time. What are you talking about? You just like to gawk at them and then go home and play with your toys. Don’t preach shit to me, crazy woman.”

“You’re such a bitch.” She jumps on the bed pounds on my shoulder lightly, playfully. I shove her away, laughing. “But you’re right,” She sits up, inspecting her nails, “I like my toys, I do. They don’t lie, cheat or have bad hygiene. And they always please me so, which makes the stock of batteries worth it.” I’ve watched porn, I’ll admit. But I don’t see the point in getting off on other people having sex. It’s just…weird. But that’s just me and I’m sure I’m in the minority on that. I don’t really get into the toys either. But I’ve been curious about how they work and how they satisfy. I used one and it was, eh. But I should invest in them, since it’ll be a decade before I decide to cave in to my “no sex until I find love” rule. “Well, we’re leaving in ten, so get your ass ready.” She leaps off the bed and out of the room.

“Should I wear a dress?” I shout into the air. I get no answer so I decide for myself. I’m gonna go out and enjoy the night, and forget about Noah, forget about the whole fiasco with Landon, forget about Andi’s father, forget about everything and do what I do best…on the stage. Singing helps me forget it all. I get consumed by the songs I sing and I’m in another place, a better place, sometimes with my mother. I feel closest to her when I’m on stage.

I stride to my closet and find a cute mid-length dress, pink and spaghetti strapped. Once I find my perfect lacy bra to go with it and change, I apply my make-up and fix my hair in a ponytail. When my ensemble is complete and I slip on my sandals, I find Andi in the kitchen. She looks great, in casual jeans and a lacy top. But then again, she looks great in anything. Her long blonde hair flows over her shoulders with enough finesse that has me jealous in envy.
“Well, you look great in that, girl. You look ready to break some hearts tonight.” I thread my arm through hers and kiss her cheek. “So do you.” First I fill my to-go cup with coffee for my fix. And we’re out the door.

It’s Thursday and usually they’re pretty packed. Everyone comes for karaoke. But being that it’s only 9:15, it’s somewhat dead. Although we saw cars pulling in the same time we were. We sit at the bar tonight and Derrick sidles up beside us. He nods to Andi and bumps my shoulder with his, “You look nice.”

“Why don’t you tell Andi that.”

“Oh come on, Maddy take a compliment when they’re given.” I inspect the bar, deciding on choice of drinks for the night. Liquor before beer, have no fear. Beer before liquor gets you sicker, quicker. Hmmm, liquor it is.

“Can I have a shot of Jack?” I ask the bar tender. “You got it pretty girl.” Right then, I feel a blush heat up my face.

“Oh, I see. So his compliment was better than mine?”

I look at Derrick, baffled. “He called me pretty, you said “nice” which isn’t a compliment girls like to hear. And why are you over here flirting with me anyway?”

“I’m fucking with you. It’s so much fun. But now I’m bored so I’m gonna find Landon.” What the hell was that?