Entice (5 page)

“It’s only because I think you’re so amazing. I’ll probably never think any guy is good enough for you.”

Her face softened. “Then why can’t you just support me in this? I really like him, Kenzie.”

I bit my lip. I wanted to just say okay and move on. We could go back to hanging out all the time. It had been so awful to go the whole weekend without talking to her or seeing her. Even if being with Haley meant I had to include Ian, I could learn to deal with it as long as I would have my best friend back.

Then I remembered the pictures on Facebook. Haley was headed down a dangerous path. I knew because I’d traveled the same road. If I really loved her I couldn’t allow her to make the same mistakes as I had.

“I want to. I really do.” I paused. “Remember when you found out I was cutting?”

She had found out a couple of months before I left for Grandma’s. Haley was at my house and she accidentally walked in on me changing. I had a fresh cut and there was no way to hide it from her.

Haley nodded. “I was really upset.”

“And you tried to get me to stop.” Two girls, wearing short skirts and wedge sandals, whisked past us and I almost choked on their fruit smelling perfume.

“Of course I tried to stop you. I didn’t want you to keep hurting yourself.”

“Exactly. Because you loved me.”

“But you didn’t stop cutting when I asked you to,” Haley reminded me.

“I know. I’m sorry. The point is that I love you too Haley, and I want to stop you from hurting yourself.”

“You’re comparing me going out with Ian to you cutting yourself?” She narrowed her eyes. The softness from before disappeared. Why couldn’t I have just kept my mouth shut?

“It has nothing to do with Ian.” I sighed. “Look, I saw the pictures on Facebook.”

“So? You knew I was going to Caleb’s party.”

“But drinking, Hales? That’s not like you.”

“No, you’re right. That’s like you.”

The comment stung. “Not anymore.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“What’s that supposed mean?”

“You’ve totally changed, Kenzie. You’re not the same person you were before summer. Last year you would’ve been happy to go out partying with me. In fact, you partied every weekend. Now, all of the sudden, you’re Miss-Goodie-Two-Shoes and you want everyone else to be too.”

Anger rose in me. “You’ve changed too, Haley. The only difference is that at least I’ve changed for the better!”

Haley’s eyes widened. I wished I could bite my tongue in two. Why did I say that?

Haley raised her eyebrows. “Oh, I see, you’re one of those judgmental Christians now. Is your boyfriend the same way? I’ll bet he tells you to stay away from me; that I’m a bad influence.”

She hit a little too close to home. “How dare you? You don’t even know Isaac.”

“Just like you don’t even know Ian but you judge him.”

“Oh, believe me I know him. I’ve known enough guys like him to know what a loser he is.”

Before I could take back the cruel words, Ian was at Haley’s side. Where did he come from?

“That’s enough,” he snapped at me. “C’mon Hales, you don’t need to take this.” She leaned into him with relief on her face as if she’d just been waiting to be rescued. It was crazy. Since when did she need to be rescued from me? He took her by the hand and led her into the cafeteria.

Fighting back tears, I glanced around. It seemed like the entire quad was staring at me. My face flamed. Had we really just made that big of a scene? I didn’t think we’d been that loud.

“Hey, you okay?” Tanner rushed over to me.

The sincerity in his voice cut to my heart and my lips quivered. I bit down on them to keep myself from crying. Blinking, I nodded.

“It’s gonna be okay,” he said.

I looked into his eyes to see if he was mocking me. The look he gave me was kind and genuine.

He smiled. “C’mon, let’s go sit down somewhere.”

I glanced at the cafeteria, not wanting to humiliate myself any further by going inside. As if reading my mind, he said, “We can go over there under that tree.” He pointed to a shady area on the grass.

“That sounds good.” I followed him, grateful he’d shown up when he did.

I ran the eye shadow brush over my lids, leaving a coat of icy purple shimmer. Staring at my reflection, I blinked a couple of times to make sure it was even. My cell phone vibrated on the bathroom counter. Setting down my makeup, I answered.

“Hey Isaac.” My voice echoed in the tiny room. I pressed open the door and stepped into the hallway.

“I haven’t heard from you all afternoon. What’s up?”

Guilt washed over me. I’d been so focused on getting ready in time that I’d forgotten to call him. “I’m so sorry. I was in a hurry. I’m going to a movie with some friends from church tonight. I had a crap-load of homework and I’ve been racing around trying to finish everything.”

“Church friends, huh? That’s great, Kenz.”

I thought of my earlier conversation at lunch with Tanner. It had been two weeks since my huge blow up with Haley and she still wasn’t speaking to me. So, to avoid having to face Ian, Caleb and that whole table I had started sitting in the quad at lunch. When I first made the decision I assumed I would eat alone. In fact, the first day I brought my headphones just in case I needed to listen to music all period. Only to my surprise, Tanner found me.

When he first sat down on the grass next to me, lunch bag in hand, I was shocked.

“Uh, I think you’re in the wrong place.”

“What do you mean?” He furrowed his brows.

“Shouldn’t you be sitting with your friends? I’m sort of a pariah right now with your group. It was nice of you to help me yesterday, but in the interest of keeping your friends, you might want to get out of here before they see you with me.” I shaded my eyes from the sun that blinded me. The tree we sat under was mostly twigs. The leaves had all fallen off.

“They’re not really my friends anymore. Ever since I became a Christian, I just don’t seem to really fit in with them. They don’t understand why I don’t want to do some of the things I used to do.”

The grass tickled my legs that were bent under my body. I stretched them out, glancing down at the spidery pattern left on my flesh. “I totally understand.” It seemed that Tanner got me in a way no one else in the school did.

So, every day since then Tanner has sat with me at lunch. Even though a part of me felt weird about hanging out with another boy when I had a boyfriend, I was also really grateful for the friendship.

This afternoon, while we ate lunch, Tanner told me was going with a group from church to the three dollar movies at Regal. It was funny how quickly Tanner had made friends at the church when I hadn’t made any. But he’d always been so charismatic. He could make friends anywhere.

He asked me to join them. At first I was going to say no, but the thought of spending another night at home alone, watching TV and eating a frozen dinner did not appeal to me at all.

“Okay.” I smiled. “That sounds like fun.”

“Great. I’ll pick you up at four thirty.”

Now, as I talked with Isaac I felt like I was betraying him by riding to the movies with Tanner. I mean, he was just a friend and we hung out at school together every day so it wasn’t like I had anything to feel guilty about. Tanner knew all about Isaac. In fact, I’d totally talked his ear off about him. We were just friends. That was all. It was no big deal. I brushed the thoughts away and continued my conversation with Isaac.

It wasn’t until I hung up that I realized, even though Tanner knew all about Isaac, I still hadn’t told Isaac anything about Tanner.

When I heard the knock at the door, I slipped on my black flats and raced down the hallway. My sleek blonde hair brushed against my shoulders and my floral skirt swished around my thighs. I hoped I wasn’t overdressed for the movies. It was just that it had been so long since I’d gone out. Frankly, I was tired of my sweats and t-shirts.

“Oooh la la,” Mom cooed as I passed her. She sat on the couch a tattered paperback in her hand. I glanced at it and winced at the scary looking creature on the front. Since when did Mom start reading horror novels? “Who are you all dressed up for?”

Yeah, I was clearly overdressed. For a second, I contemplated running back to my room and throwing on a pair of jeans. Then the knockings resumed. I decided to answer first. When I opened the door, my heart stopped. Even though Tanner was only in a collared shirt and jeans, he looked amazing. The shirt was white and brought out his tanned skin, blond hair and blue eyes. No matter what I wore, next to him I would look underdressed. I glanced over at Mom who raised her eyebrows. Embarrassed, I averted my gaze.

“Come in,” I mumbled. “I’m just gonna grab my sweater. The Regal Cinema is always so cold.” I gave Mom a warning look and hurried down the hallway. When I got to my room, I took deep breaths. What was I doing? I never should have said yes to going to the movies with him. This totally felt like a date.

My thoughts drifted to my tall, dark and handsome boyfriend. He was the boy who held my heart. The first boy I ever loved. I pulled the phone out of my pocket and sent him off a text.

Thinking of u.

His reply came quickly.
I’m always thinking of u.

My heart skipped a beat, and a smile played on my lips. I wished so badly that Isaac was here so he could go to the movies with us. Heck, if he lived here, he and Tanner would probably be friends. We’d probably all hang out. Tanner was a nice guy. He was a good friend. However, I loved Isaac and he was the only one I wanted to be with.

The phone vibrated in my hand. I glanced down.

I love u.

I texted back that I loved him too and then tucked the phone away. Satisfied that I was doing nothing wrong, I grabbed my sweater and headed back out to Tanner.

The lobby of the movie theatre smelled of popcorn and butter. It made my stomach rumble. Tanner introduced me to Janna, Rick, Toby and Garrett. I had seen all of them at church before but never talked to them. They all seemed nice. I was particularly interested in getting to know Janna, but she was mostly interested in Rick. Judging by how touchy-feely they were, it was obvious they were a couple. It made me wish more girls had come. I was really hoping to make a new girlfriend.

While Tanner and I stood in line for popcorn and sodas, I spotted Scarlet holding hands with another boy just a few feet away. She wore a mini skirt and high-heeled sandals, which showed off her long, shapely legs. I was struck, as always, by how beautiful she was. When she and Tanner were together everyone in school called them Ken and Barbie. When she glanced in our direction, I saw Tanner’s face redden. When she walked away, I turned to Tanner.

“You okay?”

He nodded.

“It must be weird seeing her with someone else. I mean, it is for me, even. You two were together forever.” When I noticed how irritated he looked, I scolded myself for rambling on like that. “I’m sorry.”

“No, you’re right. It is weird.”

It was the most Tanner had ever said about Scarlet. He never talked about her at all. I decided to capitalize on it.

“So, how come you guys broke up?”

He shook his head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay. That’s fine.” I wished I hadn’t even asked. It was none of my business. My hand flitted up to my neck and I wrapped the chain of my cross necklace nervously around my index finger.

“So, what’s with the necklace?” Tanner asked. “You wear it all the time. Is it, like, from your grandma or something?”

I dropped my hand. The chain tickled my neck as it fell back into place. “No, it was a gift from Isaac. He gave it to me on our last day together.”

Tanner nodded. “Smart dude.”

That was not the response I was expecting. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you were leaving and he didn’t want you to forget about him. So, he gave you something to wear so he’d always be on your mind.” Tanner smirked. “It’s genius, really.”

I bristled. “That’s not why he gave it to me. I would think about Isaac even if I didn’t have a necklace as a reminder.”

“Sure.” Tanner winked.

Angered, I turned away. We moved forward in the line.

“Hey, I was just teasing you.” Tanner spoke softly.

I felt silly for getting so angry. Why did I keep letting him get under my skin. It didn’t matter what he thought about my relationship with Isaac. I knew the truth.

“I know.” I smiled at him as we stepped to the counter to order.

After Tanner and I bought sodas and popcorn, we headed into the theatre. Janna and Rick had planned this evening and they chose one of those vampire love stories. Not my favorite, but it beat a sitcom on my bunny-eared television. I settled into one of the springy chairs with popcorn in my lap. As I munched on the buttery kernels, I relaxed. It was fun being out with friends. I glanced over at Tanner’s profile, blue light from the screen flickering over his cheek. He still seemed agitated over running into Scarlet. I wondered if she was somewhere in this theatre. It seemed like he was wondering the same thing by the way his gaze scanned the room instead of focusing on the screen.

He looked over at me and I felt embarrassed that he caught me staring. I flashed him a smile and looked back at the movie. As I did, I saw a man standing in the corner of the room facing me. He wore a hood over his face, but his arm was out and he beckoned me with a slow roll of his bony fingers. A chill ran down my spine. I squinted, trying to make him out in the dim light. He reached his skeletal arm up and lifted off his hood, revealing his face. It was Wesley. I gasped. He smiled.

“What’s wrong?” Tanner asked. The rest of our group turned to me, perplexed. Panicked, I looked back to where Wesley stood but no one was there. I exhaled. It was just a figment of my imagination. That was all. Most likely spurred on by this violent movie.

“Sorry, it was nothing. Just startled by the movie.” I attempted a lighthearted giggle, and shrugged my shoulders. Tanner smiled and nodded, as if to tell me he understood. But of course, he didn’t. Nobody did.

After Tanner dropped me off, I started feeling really bad about keeping Isaac in the dark about him. If I wasn’t doing anything wrong, there was no reason to hide it from him. So, after slipping into my pj’s I sat on my bed and dialed his number. It was after ten o’clock and his voice was groggy when he said hello.