Spence and Salvatore got out, needing to do something. I stayed where I was. I couldn"t
… it was selfish. Awfully, selfish, but I couldn"t stand beside Lincoln and be told what I knew Griffin was going to say. Hell, I"d felt it back in the cave.
„Her soul is shattered. She"s alive," he shook his head and coughed out a small cry.
„Trapped inside her own … I can"t reach her. No one ever will."
I looked out the window in the opposite direction. I couldn"t watch and I wished I couldn"t hear.
Don"t cry. Don"t cry. Breathe. Concentrate. Breathe. One, two, three. Remember how this
goes, remember you can do this. When everything falls apart, when everything is strangled
and taken from you and nothing is left, not even the tiniest glimmer -
I ran my hands over my face, pulled back my hair and swallowed through the lump in my throat that I knew was there to stay.
Remember the rules. Don"t back down. Don"t run. Don"t quit. And now, remember the
new rule … don"t dream silly dreams.
At some point, Spence and Salvatore got back in the truck. Lincoln went upstairs to try and help Griffin. I think in the end he may have found it less torturous to be up in Nyla"s hel than down with me.
Magda stayed away from us, which at least a small blessing. Silence dragged on and on.
Someone passed me a bottle of water. I hugged it until fatigue finally overtook the numbness and I felt asleep.
-
My paintbrush glided over the canvas. The colour flowing and changing without me even
trying - and effortless spiral of illuminating colour.
I forced my hand to stop. The painting before me started to bleed tears of grey.
I dropped the brush and looked over to the window, where I knew he would be looking
out. He was the same - tall, handsome, overly strong jaw and distant. Inhuman. More
interested in the outside world than being confined to my dream so I guess that meant the
territory belonged to me.
„Are you my Angel parent?" I asked.
He nodded once.
„Who are you?" I pressed, going through the motions. He had told me to call him Lochmet
- warrior – but I knew that wasn"t his real name.
„That is not important."
„Are you one of the Sole?"
„Yes."
His answer threw me. I hadn"t expected anything so direct.
„Can you tell me who you are?"
„First, you must know who
you
are – and you must see what is see what is in front of you."
He watched something through the window and it was surreal to see what he was gazing
upon was not the true view from my city apartment. Though it was raining like it usually did in
my dreams, he was looking over an open field with a tall forest in the distance. Perhaps this
wasn"t only my dream.
„Is this about Jude? Did you know him?"
„He was my dearest friend for a time."
„Why did he exile?"
„For balance. Sometimes, the things that are required of us are beyond our
comprehension and even when we have fulfil ed our destiny … it can be hard to recognise if
we have done so with a clear conscience."
„I don"t understand."
He sighed, for the first time showing emotion. It was sadness or even … a type of
acceptance. „Humanity requires simplicity. A vil ain in every story appeals to the most basic
human felling, mistrust. There was a time when direction was necessary, a certain form of
proof for comfort. To achieve this we had to provide defeat in some, in others, triumph
against all odds."
„Why?" I asked, stil struggling to see where this was going.
„Because the only human emotion inherent than mistrust is the need for victory."
„You sent me those other dreams, didn"t you? They were about Jude, weren"t they?" I
asked, remembering flashback from dreams I had not been able to hold onto.
„In a way."
„He"s stuck here, isn"t he?" I pressed, starting to feel a kind of sickness in my gut.
„He is waiting. Beware, Violet, trouble follows."
I didn"t even have a sarcastic retort. Mostly because I knew he was telling the truth. I
looked back to my canvas - it was completely grey now, all the colour covered over. I
glanced to the window again.
He was gone. Despite my unanswered questions, I was relieved.
I walked to the corner of my art studio, relishing the solitude. I crumpled to the floor and
allowed myself the private freedom to cry. And cry. And cry.
-
I woke with a jolt when the plane touched the ground. My eyes shot open and locked instantly with Lincoln"s. he was sitting on one of the landing seats along the side, watching me.
I quickly wiped my eyes to break the contact. They were wet. I cursed myself.
By the time I looked back, Lincoln had moved away.
Spence and Salvatore made stretching noises as they unfolded themselves from the truck. A group of army guys came from the cockpit area and bowed their heads as they passed us. They headed straight for the coffin and stood in front of it respectfully.
„We have to get off," I said to Zoe, not bothering to ask how she was. There was only one answer to that question.
She grabbed her backpack and kicked open her door. „You sense anything?"
I concentrated. „No."
She shrugged, trying to hide the relief. „Pity."
I mustered a small smile, which she returned.
When we walked down the ramp from the back of the plane, two Grigori were waiting for us. Zoe, Salvatore and Spence went over and started speaking with them. I hung back until Spence called me to join them. They were from the Academy in New York. They were here to take Rudyard back.
And Nyla.
I felt sick as I watched the army guys wheel Rudyard"s pale wooden coffin down the ramp. They had him on a goddamned trolley. I felt even worse when I watched Griffin carrying Nyla.
Rudyard got the better deal.
The Grigori - I forgot their names, although they introduced themselves and I think I even shook their hands - had a private jet waiting. Griffin wouldn"t hand over Nyla. He insisted on carrying her onto the plan and getting her settled.
The Grigori told Zoe, Salvatore and Spence that they would be returning to collect them and all of Nyla and Rudyard"s belongings in two days. Everyone just nodded.
Lincoln stayed with Griffin, who was a mess after handing over Nyla, walking him to a waiting taxi. Magda went with them. The rest of us piled into another taxi. Phoenix wasn"t at the airport. None of them were.
„I think we should have a memorial. You know, something here - to say goodbye," Zoe said.
I nodded. It was a good idea. Rudyard should be remembered.
„He had no regrets. Rudyard, I mean," Zoe said. „I remember once in one of his classes, he said if he were to die in battle he would die fulfil ed."
I couldn"t help but wonder if he would agree now. Given the state in which he"d left Nyla.
„He also used to say," “We fight the fights that need fighting. Sometimes we win but when we lose and should we die, others will fight in our name, because only one thing is certain for Grigori – we must fight,”" Spence said, impersonating Rudyard endearingly.
„He was right," I said.
Zoe jingled a set of keys I recognised in the air. „Lincoln gave me his keys. They"re taking Griffin via his place first. He needs a shower and has to check on the local Grigori. Lincoln said we could let ourselves in."
Spence called out the address to the driver, who nodded and drove on. I ignored the fact that Lincoln had left without a word and that he hadn"t passed this information through me, like he once would have. That was before.
I fished out my mobile phone, but it was long dead. „Hey Salvatore, have you spoken to Steph lately?"
Salvatore nodded. „I telephone her before boarded aeroplane. She was worried for you.
Frantic … said I was not to take my eyes from you. She is waiting at Mr Lincoln"s houses."
„Thanks," I said, suddenly grateful Lincoln and Griffin weren"t going to get there first. I had a feeling Steph would have used the spare key to let herself in.
-
I was right. As soon as we put key in the lock, Steph was pulling the door open from the inside.
She pushed past everyone, including Salvatore, and grabbed me. Her slender frame hugged me so tight I was scared I would actually allow myself to feel it. But the numbness stayed with me. Protected me.
„Thank God you"re okay," Steph said.
How could I explain I wasn"t.
„Sal told me what happened. about Rudyard," She looked down. „And Nyla," she added quietly.
„I think I should have a shower," I said, subtly moving out of Steph"s hold. If anyone could break me right now, it was her. I dug my mobile out of my pocket and put it on Lincoln"s charger in the kitchen as I walked by. It even gutted me that we had the same phone.
„Vi, I … I can"t believe I have to do this to you," Steph said, as we followed me and sucked in a deep breath. „I mean, I totally want you to hibernate, you know, do your thing. I don"t want to be part of the problem, but … I found something and I think … I
know
, you have to see."
I just nodded and followed her down the hall towards the spare room. Spence moved to follow us but Steph gave him a look and he turned back to the living room.
„You"ve been busy," I said, taking in the chaos that was Lincoln"s spare room. Boxes were open everywhere and papers piled up in what I imagined were all chronological or alphabetical or numerical order or something else incredibly intelligent that would be way beyond me yet totally normal for Steph. Then I realised something else.
„"Steph, Lincoln never even comes into this room himself. He"s going to freak."
„Violet, honey." She braced a hand on my shoulder. „I know you"ve been to hell and back.
I do. I real y get it and I don"t even know how you"re holding it together, but right now I need you to look at some pieces of paper and follow what I"m about to tell you."
„Whatever, this is, can"t it wait?"
„That"s the thing sweetie …"
I looked up.
Steph shook her head.
Perfect.
I sat on the floor and Steph sat beside me. She picked up the first piece of paper that showed me bank records – transfers from Lincoln"s Mum"s company, big lump sums going into some account. Then she showed me more of the same and a piece of paper that showed the bank account where the transfers had gone.
„Are you following?" Steph said, watching me, reminding me that somehow all of this mattered.
„Big money transfers from her company to this account and I take it this account is somehow linked to Nahilius, right?"
„Right," she said, sifting through the papers in her next pile.
„Steph," I started to complain, but she shoved another piece of paper under my face and pointed to a line at the bottom. It was another back transfer sheet. This one had funds, almost as large, going from Nahilius" bogus account to another.
My eyes widened as I looked at the piece if paper. „Do you know who this account belongs to?" I asked, starting to understand.
Steph pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket. „I had to hack into the computer files of the bank"s main server and could be going for a long vacation to jail very soon, but …" she waved the piece of paper.
„You know who Nahilius was working for?"
Trust Steph to delve deeper than anyone else had dared to consider.
She nodded, „And I want you to promise me that after you look at this, no matter what -
no matter what you want to do - you have to swear you will not leave this room until I say you can."
„Steph, stop messing around," I snapped.
„Promise."
„I"m not promising everything, give me the damn paper or I"l stand up and take it from you."
Steph stared at me, I stared back and wondered if I actual y had it in me. She didn"t budge.
„Steph!" I yelled.
„I love you, Violet, so no. Not until you promise." She held strong but I saw her cringing just a little, her fingers clenched tightly to the paper. She was scared of me.
I recoiled. „Oh my God, Steph, I"m sorry. I … everything is so messes up."
„I get it. Don"t think I haven"t worked it out, Vi. I know the moment Nyla lost Rudyard, you lost … I"m sorry. And I feel like a cow having to do this to you but I know if you promise me, you will do it and I know you can"t look at this piece of paper until you promise me."
I threw my head back and looked at the ceiling. „Okay. I promise." I stood up and Steph unfolded the piece of paper.
„I"ve got a new name for Mr Burke"s list of great betrayers," Steph said, as I read the words that made so many things click into place.
I scrunched the paper in my hand and but down hard. „I"m gonna kil -„ but Steph cut me foo.
„Not until I tell you, you can leave the room," she said crossing her arms.
„
Suppose you struggle through to the good and
find that it also is dreadful?"
C.S. Lewis
Steph let me be for the first half hour. I sat on the ground, staring at the piece of paper, trying to put all the pieces together. Steph went about putting all the other paperwork back into boxes, leaving a few key documents in a small pile. Eventually, she sat beside me and helped me try to fil in the gaps. Every now and then, I"d leap to my feet and charge for the door, furious and needing to do something. Each time, Steph pul ed out the „You swore" card and I"d slump to the ground.
After we had gone over about as much as I could handle, I groaned. „Lincoln wil be back soon. Maybe we should go out."
Steph just headed back to the last of the boxes after passing me her laptop.
„Why don"t you read over my chem notes first? You have a few classes to catch up on."