Enticing Interlude (Tempest #2) (34 page)

The baying of the buffalo soothed me as I washed and hung up the last of the milking equipment. I took the bandana off my head and used it to wipe the sweat from my brow.

If only I could wipe the memory of him just as easily from my mind. I missed him. Everything about him. His gentle touch. His poetic words. His enticing voice. His alluring arsenal of smiles.

I closed my eyes, forcing back the tears.

Again.

When I opened them, I spotted Don over in the far corner of the barn. He had his cell to his ear, probably calling in a feed order. I’d noticed the supply was getting low. I waved my hand to let him know I was going in. He nodded his understanding but his face wore a troubled frown.

I was miserable. I don’t think I was fooling anybody with my fake bravado, least of all myself.

In my rubber work boots, I trudged carefully though the sludge, taking a deep breath of manure free air when I finally got outside. As warm as it had been in the barn surrounded by the buffalo, it was cool enough outside that my breath frosted. The sun had just begun to peek over the top of the Cowichen Hills. The birds were chirping their good morning. A brisk breeze whipped my hair around my head. It was shaping up to be a beautiful day.

I wished I could conjure a mood to match it.

I gave myself a mental shake and made my way briskly up the well-worn path to the house, knowing Carter would be awake soon. I shed my dirty boots and left them on the stoop. I padded through the mudroom in my socks on the way to the kitchen for a much needed cup of coffee. Rheta was there. She paused in the motion of pouring one for herself.

“You don’t need to do chores, honey. You’re a guest.”

“I don’t mind, really,” I insisted. “I like helping out. Plus I enjoy being around the animals.” I went to the sink and washed my hands. I didn’t tell her the real reason. That I needed to stay busy to keep from feeling sorry for myself and to take my mind off the constant yearning I felt for him inside. When I finished drying my hands, she handed me a cup of my own.

“Well, I’m sure Don appreciates the help.” She moved to the table and took a seat on the bench, indicating that I should join her. She immediately pushed a plate of eggs and bacon toward me.

I threw my leg over the bench but ignored the food. I wrapped my hands around the mug and took a careful sip of the coffee. Extra strong. Just the way I liked it.

Her eyes narrowed. “You need to eat something.”

“I’m not hungry.” I didn’t feel much like eating these days. I looked away focusing on the view out the window above the sink. The tree tops were swaying beneath the steady wind.

“Bridget.” Her warm hand covered my own, her expression revealing her concern. “If you’re going to work so hard on the farm, you can’t keep skipping meals. You’ve lost weight since you’ve been here.”

“But…”

“And you’re not sleeping either,” she cut in. “You’ve got circles under your eyes.” Her lips flattened in disapproval. “I haven’t wanted to push, but I just spoke with Avery. She told me that Justin’s been looking everywhere for you. I think it’s time we talked about what happened between you two.”

I lost my grip on the mug. It slipped out of my fingers and clattered onto the table. I’d worried he might pressure me. That’s why I had come here. To avoid a confrontation. To regroup. But instead of the tranquility I’d sought, I’d found myself sinking deeper into despair. Carter and I should’ve moved out days ago, but I hadn’t wanted to leave. I’d been clinging to this peaceful place like it was my only hope.

Rheta handed me a paper towel to clean up the spill. She’d been so gracious and patient with me. I owed her an explanation. I pulled in a deep breath and looked her in the eyes. “Mrs. Anthony,” I began.

She shook her head gently.

“Rheta,” I corrected myself. Before I could go any further, a chill ran down my spine as the sound of Carter’s voice reached my ears.

“No, Justin.”

I scrambled off the bench nearly face planting into the table in my haste to get to him.

As I rounded the corner from the kitchen, I instantly froze. Carter was on the house phone, twisting the old fashioned spiral cord in his hand.

“I can’t tell you. Mommy made me promise. She told me some people only love us for a little while, and then they stop.” I could hear in his voice how much he was hurting. Tears filled my eyes.

“I’ve been following the superhero code just like you taught me.” Unchecked tears coursed down his chubby cheeks. “I’ve been strong and brave, and protected Mommy… but she still cries sometimes.”

I covered my mouth to stifle a sob. I needed to get him off the phone. I wished now that he weren’t so good at memorizing phone numbers. This was only going to make everything even harder.

I stepped forward. Carter saw me. His liquid blue eyes widened and his bottom lip trembled. “It’s time to say good bye,” I insisted.

“Mommy’s here. I have to go… I love you, too. Good bye, Justin,” Carter said softly and handed me the receiver.

I heard Justin calling my name as I set the receiver firmly back in the base. I grabbed Carter and pulled him close, one arm wrapped around his body, the other one crooked around his head holding it to my chest. I kissed the top of his head. “I wish you wouldn’t have called him, but it’s ok, Carter.” My pulse was pounding so loud in my ears that the return ring didn’t register at first.

Rheta answered it. “Hello.” Her eyes were on me and her brows pulled together. “Yes, she is.” She crooked her finger calling me over.

I shook my head and backed away.

“I’m sorry. She doesn’t want to talk…lower your voice Justin. No…Yes, I understand. Tomorrow. I’ll tell her to expect you.” Rheta set down the phone. She gave me a stern look. “Come back to the kitchen. We need to finish our conversation.”

I shook my head. “I realize now it was a mistake to come out here. I didn’t mean to place you in an uncomfortable position. We’ll pack up and leave right away. I’m so sorry.”

“Not as sorry as you’re gonna be if you don’t march yourself right back into that kitchen and hear what I have to say.”

My eyes went large. I turned to Carter. “Go upstairs and play.”

“I’m sorry Mommy. I didn’t mean to be bad.”

Damn.
His sad regret filled look knocked my battered heart around some more.

“You aren’t. You’re the best son in the whole wide world. Mrs. Anthony and I just need to talk about important grown up stuff. Go on.” I pushed him gently toward the stairs. “I’ll be up in a minute.”

“Ok,” he said with a nervous glance back at me before he went up.

Rheta’s back was stiff when I reentered the kitchen. Sucking it up, I sat back down opposite her at the table.

“You eat something.” She pushed the plate of food toward me again. “Then you’re going to listen to what I have to say.” When I’d cleaned half the plate, she seemed to be satisfied.

“Don and I knew something was wrong the minute you showed up alone at our doorstep. But you looked like you needed a place of refuge, and we were happy to provide one. But frankly I’m surprised it took this long for you to be found out.”

“I can explain.”

“I expect you will, and I’ll let you in just a minute.” She folded her hands. “Justin told me you think he was with another woman.”

My mouth went tight. “He was.”

“He says he wasn’t, and I believe him. Now I realize that I’ve known him for a bit longer than you have, but I think you know him well enough by now.”

My eyes burned under the critical blast of her stare.

“Did you ever ask him to explain?”

I shook my head.

“So you just took off without hearing his side of the story? That seems pretty impulsive.”

“Yes,” I whispered. When she put it like that, it didn’t sound so good. My eyes dropped to my lap.

“Forgive me. I don’t mean to judge you. Sometimes I forget just how young you really are.”

Hearing her gentler tone, I looked up. “Antonia told me that they were…well, you know…while he was supposed to be watching Carter at the pool. And she told me a bunch of other things that made me feel certain that my trust in him had been misplaced.”

“Hmmm. Sounds to me like she knew all the right buttons to push.”

I let that sink in. “I guess so.”

“Well, Bridget,” she patted my clasped hands, “You’re going to have to put some thought into your next move. Your first one was pretty wretched.”

I closed my eyes, but I couldn’t hide from the truth in her words. Tears burned behind my eyelids as I ran back through the events of that day. I’d been so tired, so easily frightened. Had I been so wrong?

When I opened my eyes, Rheta handed me a napkin. Feeling adrift in a sea of conflicting emotions, I dried my tears. “How can I be sure?” I begged her.

“I can’t tell you who to believe, and I can’t tell you what to do. But I will say this. In my experience it’s not often that we can be completely sure when we have to make the big decisions in life. Sometimes we have to go on faith. You have to decide whether you have faith in Justin. But more importantly whether you have enough faith in yourself.”

Rheta’s convicting words echoing in my ears, the wooden floorboards creaked beneath my feet as I made my way up the stairs.

I paused inside the doorway to our room. Carter was sitting cross legged on the floor playing with his Legos. I still hadn’t worked out in my mind what I was going to say to him when he looked up, his expression so sad I felt the weight of it settling heavily inside my chest.

I moved to the bed and patted the spot next to me. Carter rose and pulled himself up on the high twin mattress. I hugged him first, my hands on his back between his shoulders, inhaling his wonderful little boy smell.

I pulled back and looked at his face.

“I’m sorry, Mommy.”

“No, Carter. I’m the one who needs to apologize. Mommy made a mistake. A big one. One that hurt you and Justin and me.” I sucked in a deep breath through my nose and reached for him again, tucking his head into my chest and pressed a kiss into his silky hair. “Do you remember the story I told you when Hinklesnort first met Thinthorp and how badly he really wanted him to be his friend?”

“Yeah.” He leaned back to peer up at me. “He gave Thinthorp all his favorite toys and lots of candy.”

I nodded. “Did any of that stuff work?”

“No, Mommy.” He looked so serious, his cute little blond brows drawn together. “They only became best friends after Hinklesnort pulled Thinthorp out of the Icky Sticky Quicksand in the Scary Woods.”

“That’s right.” I sighed. “Justin’s a lot like Hinklesnort.” I looked around the room. “He brought us here. He showed us by his actions how much he cared about us and then he gave us the very best gift of all…himself.” I touched my finger to his soft cheek. “But that wasn’t enough for me. I listened to someone I shouldn’t have. Believed lies about Justin without giving him a chance to explain. I guess I didn’t believe he could really love me.”

“Don’t worry. Justin knows the superhero code. He’ll rescue us, just like Hinklesnort. You’ll see.”

“I’m ok, sis. Really.” I leaned in, gave her a peck on the cheek, and pointed my head toward the dressing room door. “Get back out there. You’re gonna miss Cold Snake if you stay back here hovering.”