Erin Dameron-Hill (25 page)

My eyes reached Anubis and I held his gaze. He seemed a bit confused and curious but I didn’t care. I just stood and faced him down. The cards had told me to embrace myself, and just embracing my beast had made me that much stronger. All I had to do now was embrace my Entity and I would be made whole. I would survive this and I would become a better person for it. Anubis may have thought that taking away my friends and family would leave me vulnerable, but he was sadly mistaken. It only served to make me stronger, to make me a force to be reckoned with because I had nothing left to lose.

Chapter
Twenty Five

I stood toe to toe with Anubis, my eyes never faltering on the gold nuggets that were his eyes. Our gazes had locked and we were each vying for power, for control. My beast roamed through my veins, sniffing and clawing inside me, she wanted out, she wanted to be able to fight Anubis, to fight her maker. But she just paced.

Anubis closed his eyes suddenly and inhaled deeply through his nose. I watched as his nostrils flared, as he breathed in my beast and my power. He chuckled again and opened his eyes, “Oh, Anput, you can try, but you will fail.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said trying for my best ignorant face.

“Your beast will never attack me because I made
him
. I can bind
him
.”

“Well, see, there are two mistakes with that sentence, 1) My beast is
female
, not a male and 2) you can’t bind her. We’ve already removed the shackles that you tried to her up with. So you can’t do jack shit to us.”

He scoffed, “I am your master. You will do whatever I say. That’s how it works. My Israelite slaves understood the concept, after several whippings of course, and so, too, will you understand this arrangement.”

“Are you going to beat me just as you would a slave?” I shook my head in disgust, “How are you even still around? A slaver and misogynistic asshole can’t possibly exist in today’s society without severe contempt. Is that why you follow me around century after century because you’re so pathetically lonely that the only person even willing to have a conversation with you is the woman being forced to stand here and talk? You call me pathetic because I mourn the loss of my friends and family but you don’t even know what that loss feels like because you’re the one obsessed with a “love” who will never love you in return. I will never worship you as you want me to. You have hounded me for centuries so you must know that I will never be yours. You have completely and totally wasted your life on a dream that you will never reach. And you call me pathetic? The more I learn of you, the more pity I feel for you.”

“Pity?!” he roared, “pathetic?!” he yelled again in my face slinging slobber and hot breath all over my head. His large paw-hands grabbed my shoulders and flung me across his wolves, at least forty feet. I tried to turn my body in mid-air so I could land on my hands and hopefully not break my back, but I was still twisted as I landed in the gooey muck of the swamp with a hard smack. My entire right side went numb with the sudden onslaught of pain and I was instantly sick. My stomach turned and knotted and as I looked up to see Anubis running towards me for another throw, white spots blurred my vision. I couldn’t really see him, I could just barely make out his arm coming down on me again before my head throbbed as if a million giant elephants were stomping all over me. I felt more stomach acid roll out of my mouth as I laid there limply. I couldn’t move, nor did I want to. As much as I wanted adrenaline to kick in, it didn’t. I was too hurt to even try to run away. My body pulsed with burning pain and throbbed violently under my skin. I moaned barely as breath came and went none too gently. It hurt so much to breath that I knew my ribs were broken because every time I inhaled, it felt as if I were being stabbed again and again in my chest.

I reached out toward the ground in an effort to move because I knew I couldn’t stay here anymore. I had to get out. I had enraged Anubis, the original werewolf, the powerful false god, and his anger had not yet subsided. I don’t know what got into me as I said those words and right now, I really wished I had just kept my mouth shut.

A cold breeze bristled through my blackened fingers as I looked at my hand. It seemed an odd time for the Entity to appear and yet, I expected it. I wanted the Entity to make its presence known so that I could fully make myself whole. According to the cards, I could live through this if I just accepted every part of me. If I could just love the spiritual beings that plagued me, if I could just love myself for all my flaws, then Anubis wouldn’t stand a chance. He wouldn’t be able to hit me, to hurt me, to take away my friends, my family, my Hunter.

I jerked my hand back as the Entity bit into my broken index finger and in that split second, Anubis’ foot had slammed into the ground. The Entity had saved me. Because of its’ cold bite, I had moved just in time. I was ahead of Anubis. I was a few seconds ahead of him.

I smiled even as my body screamed in broiled pain. Physical pain is nothing compared to the emotional pain that Anubis had caused me all my life, and, well, previous lives. He had always taken away everyone that I held dear. This time, though, he would not live to see another day. He would not meet me in another life, he would not ruin one more minute of this one. So, I smiled because I knew something he didn’t; I was becoming whole, at one with my beast and my entity. Congratulations, Anubis, your wish has come true, Anput has returned in all of her glory and that means were now on an equal playing field.

I felt my body go flying backwards into the decaying logs and it didn’t bother me. I looked harshly into my beast’s eyes and she howled excitedly as she ripped herself through my skin, my muscles, my already torn apart body.

I stood up on my two, strong, black furry legs and howled loudly at the full moon. My body rippled outward with strength, with power, with revenge. My tailed wagged delicately as I stared at Anubis who was frozen just a few feet away from me. I was the Jackal, the Entity; I was Sophia Morgan and he could never take this away from me.

I jumped gently to the side as Anubis lunged for me. He landed head first into a pile of green goop. His paws slammed on the ground as he hunched towards me.

“All I have to do is release my wolves on you,” he said angrily, growling at the same time.

“Then why don’t you?” I replied with my voice.

“Because I’m trying to spare you. I’m trying to protect you.”

“You have an odd way of showing it.”

“Women need to be hit sometimes. They need to stay in line. You need to know who commands you. Everything I do, I do it for you.”

“Yeah, I don’t think Bryan Adams meant that sentence to be used like that.”

“Who?”

“Just some guy. Never you mind.”

“And there it is. The uppity attitude that all women cop. It’s why you need to be beaten. You must learn to be submissive. You are not stronger than me, you are not more dominate, either. You are beneath me.”

“If I’m so far beneath you, then why bother chasing me all these years?”

“Because I love you Anput, you are me, you are a piece of me just as Eve was a piece of Adam. You belong to me, you are mine.”

“I don’t think so. And news flash, I don’t believe in that archaic bullshit of belonging to someone. If I was a piece of furniture like a couch, sure you can own me. But I’m not. I’m a human being just like you and we can’t be owned. I am not property and I will not be treated as such.”

“You call
me
a human? You compare me to a human?” he roared again, his anger pulsing through the air as if a tornado had just landed, “I am a God! So, you can say whatever you want, but you cannot deny my power. And with that power, I will break you. It would behoove you to bow to me now. Otherwise…”

“Or else what? You’ll hit me again. I’d like to see you try,” I said. I don’t know when this bravery came to me, and I don’t know why. Honestly, I scared myself. I’m face to face with a god and I’m back-talking. He could kill me. But I don’t think he would. He’s too obsessed with me, he wants me too badly. Instead, I think he would keep me caged for all eternity just so he could see me every day and with that sentence, I’m much more scared. But I’ll keep fighting because I will not willingly be treated as nothing more than a mouse caught in a trap.

Chapter Twenty Six

Anubis scoffed in the bright, full light of the round moon. This was the third time that he had laughed at me. There is a difference between laughing
with
someone and laughing
at
someone; Anubis was laughing at me. He didn’t see me as a threat, hell, he didn’t even see me as a person. He saw me as his property, a piece of furniture he could move around at will.

It was that train of thought that caused my fist to clench. My claws dug deeply into my palms and I could feel the harsh burn of blood seeping between my furred fingers.

The instant I had torn skin, the other wolves began to jitter next to me. They smelled it. They wanted it and I wasn’t sure Anubis would be able to hold them back. The sharp splay of metal entered my nostrils so delicately, that I kept inhaling my own blood, entranced and yearning to lick it up.

I looked past my desire and focused more on Anubis. I hated him. I wanted him bruised and battered at my feet for causing all of my pain and suffering. I wanted him to writhe at the thought of losing everyone he loves and losing parts of his soul as he went to each one’s funeral. I wanted him to cry himself to sleep as he remembered his family’s hopes and dreams. I wanted him to feel this pain that I will always carry because of him.

And my fist clenched tighter. I squirmed gently under my own pain but at least I could focus all of that hurt towards Anubis. It was his fault that everyone I loved and cared about were dead and some were nothing more than animals now, nothing more than his personal minions.

Anubis’ eyebrow reached into his forehead as he saw the red liquid coursing down my hand, “And what exactly does self-infliction gain you?”

“Chaos,” I said simply. No matter how much control Anubis thought he had of his wolves, he wouldn’t be able to keep them back from fresh blood. It’s nearly impossible for me to ignore blood when I’m in human form, much less when I’m in wolf-form.

“Ah, you think my followers will betray me and attack you and then I would have to intervene and get hurt in the process as well. Is that it?”

No. Okay I lied to myself. I thought it was a good idea.

“I control them no matter what. They may desire your blood, but they will not move until I tell them to.”

“Are you so sure?” I asked as my heart beat sped up feeling the wolf that was breathing on my calves. I felt the first firings of adrenaline rush through my system, telling me to run. But I didn’t. I held my ground. I needed this bluff to work to at least buy me time to run the hell out of there.

“Charlie, back away!” Anubis yelled with a malicious smile.

“Charlie?” I asked more to myself than to Anubis. I turned around and that man who had always caused me to laugh was busy sniffing me as if I was nothing more than hamburger. I wanted to cry then and there. I would never have Charlie back as my friend because his body had been completely burned so there was no chance his wolf could eat himself back up and become human once more. He would forever be an animal, an animal that belonged to Anubis.

“I hate you,” I growled to the Egyptian god grinning with a nasty wickedness that made a person think of Maleficent from Sleeping Beauty reveling in her own evil.

“You don’t really. Soon, you will come to love me. To worship me, to lay with me.”

As soon as he said the word ‘lay’, an ancient power swept over me sending red-hot chills coursing down my body and pulling at me in-between my thighs. It was just like my dream; I wanted to go to him, but I knew I shouldn’t. Anubis wanted me next to him, wanted me spread before him but I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction. He may be my maker, but he couldn’t control me like he could everyone else.

My fist was still clenched when I leapt forward and threw myself at Anubis’ face. I slammed my hands into those cold, golden eyes and punched him as hard as I could. He had taken so much from me that he wasn’t going to get his wish. Not now. Not ever. I will keep fighting him until it’s the last thing I do.

Anubis howled angrily at the full moon and barred his teeth in my direction. He pushed me off of him and slammed me backwards into a shrub. The harsh needles of the bush dug into my torn skin but I just shrugged it off. Adrenaline coursed through me forcing my muscles to tighten and sending me into a fight response. I ran forward, my thighs rippling outward on the soft, muddy swampland. I roared as I ran and threw myself onto the hard figure of a god. I felt a thousand sharp pains dig into my back but I didn’t care, I just kept hitting him. I saw his gold eyes turn red and still I didn’t care. There was no turning back. I had to keep hitting him.

I was really young when my father died, only eight, but I can still remember one bit of advice he gave me, “once they’re down, keep them down.” Did I mention my father was a wrestler in high school and college? He was constantly living in the glory days and for that, I was thankful because I wasn’t about to give Anubis the upper hand.

My clawed fists kept colliding with his face. I could hear bones crunching underneath my own power even as a massive pressure was bearing down on my stomach. But I couldn’t think about myself. Every hit was for my friends and family. Every hit was revenge.

I almost smiled as my eyes caught a glimpse of his tailored black suit; I had ripped it to shreds as I kneeled on him, tearing the fine linen into a million pieces of muddy and tattered strings. So much for his dignity. It was more than just a suit that I was tearing apart; I was tearing away his pride exactly as he had done to me.

My knuckled paws cringed with each punch as my knuckles glistened in the moonlight. I was drenched with blood and I didn’t care. I relished in the pain and agony that Anubis was suffering. He was still trying to push me off of him and I wasn’t going to give him that chance.

Keep him down. Keep him down, I kept repeating to myself. Don’t let him utter a single word because if he does, his wolves will attack me and there will be no more living for me. My hands found his throat and I squeezed. I wanted to strangle the life out of him, leave him choking and gagging on all the pain he caused me just I had choked and gagged over my friends and family.

It felt good to feel his hot blood splash onto my face every time I dug my claws into his flesh. I wanted revenge for what he did to me.

And then I stopped. I wasn’t defending myself, no, I was trying to kill someone. There would be no turning back to human once I took a life. In body I would be human, but my soul would be empty and hollow, a shell of nothing more than pure evil. I had wanted to kill Anubis, to wallow in vengeance, but if I kept hitting him, I would be Anubis. I wouldn’t be better than him. I would be a murderer just as he is. So, I didn’t keep him down. I stood up in the middle of the circle that the wolves had formed and offered my hand.

I wasn’t going to hurt anyone anymore, I was going to help. I wanted to be better than Anubis and I wasn’t going to sink to his level.

I may think that he had taken everything away from me, but he didn’t. He couldn’t take away my humanity.

Anubis reached for my hand as his tongue lapped up the blood on his mouth. He smiled, his black lips pulling back to reveal dozens of sharp, white and pointed fangs, for an instant and before I could move, he pounced.

“Never give them an inch,” he growled, “isn’t that what your daddy used to tell you.”

A few tears etched themselves down my cheeks and matted in the black fur that was my skin. Yes, that’s what my father used to tell me and I should have listened. But if I was going to fight, I wanted it to be in self-defense and Anubis hadn’t attacked me yet. But now he had.

“If you don’t get off me, I will kill you,” I said with a hushed growl.

“I highly doubt you could.”

“I was just pummeling you with hardly any effort, imagine what I can do if I put my mind to it.”

He laughed and I watched as that laugh floated through the trees and shook the very foundation of the swamp, “I let you.”

“Yeah, that makes sense. Of course you wanted me to beat you up,” I said sarcastically.

“When you felt all that anger and rage, you almost became an animal. You almost became mine.”

“Almost is a really big fucking word.”

“You can’t deny what you are. You are my animal to call, you are my mate, my female. You belong to me. And every moment that you think of hurting me, you become closer and closer to your true self, a true wolf. Once there, you’ll be at my beck and call. So, keep on hitting me, please. I can take it,” he said cracking a few of his knuckles as if he was about to type a memo, completely nonchalant.

“Fuck you.”

“If you really want to we can. I was hoping for a little bit more privacy, but in front of the wolves will be fine.”

“That’s not an invitation and you know it,” I growled back at him with a very deep voice.

“It doesn’t matter whether you invite me or not,” he panted, his powerful arms forcing my chest deeper into the boggy ground, “I’ll do what I want. And right now, your blood is boiling in my veins and I want more of you on me. I want your life soaking into my skin, clinging to my fur, winding its way down my throat.”

His eyes were so lusty, so hungry, that they glowed with a fury I had never seen before. He had been waiting for this for so long that his anticipation was drooling over my face sending that hot spit down my throat.

I felt my eyes grow wide with fear and horror. Anubis was so much more powerful than me that I wouldn’t be able to defend myself. He was going to rape me. He was going to take away my pride next. It wasn’t enough to take away everyone I had ever loved. No. He was going to take everything away and leave me as nothing more than a tortured shell of a person.

His body leaned heavily against mine and I felt the cold mud of the swamp crawl into my fur. I tried to struggle, but he was right, he had let me hit him. He was so much stronger than I was. I cried even more and tried to shake him off, but he kept coming closer to me. The other wolves began to howl and then a sharp, erupting sound shattered my screams.