Micah gave her a strange look, something that made her wonder if she might be so transparent that he could see right past her words to the feeling lurking in her heart. Feelings she wasn't quite sure she felt ready to voice. “He always will, Dannette. The question is, has he moved on?”
“I don't know. I think so. Butâ” she gave a half grinâ“he does seem to be firmly planted in the glory days, doesn't he?”
Micah didn't smile. “Make no mistake. Guys like Will don't just walk away from the Rangers. It becomes a part of them. My gut tells me that there's something else going on here.”
Kirby ran up to Dani with the ball and dropped it. She threw it again and he charged after it. “I believe him, Micah. He's here to find that girl. And so am I. So, as long as Missy's okay, I'd like to keep looking.”
Micah glanced out toward the lake, where the departing sun threw it into shadow. “Don't want to leave her alone as long as there's a chance, huh?”
Dani smiled and met his eyes with a soft nod.
He gave her a sad smile. “You know you couldn't save her, right?”
Dani looked away, rubbed her hands on her pants as his words sank in. He wasn't talking about this mystery girl, and she knew it. “Yeah. I know.”
“You were six, honey. Let it go.”
She winced. “Yeah, well, you know how easy it is to escape your regrets, don't you?”
Micah had spent nearly twenty years regretting letting the woman he loved marry another. It drove him to risks, hot spots in the world, and most of all to eventually believe that woman could be a murderer. “Okay, that was fair, but still, it wasn't your fault. You know that.”
She sighed, examined the dirt in the lines of her hands. It felt like ages since she'd had a shower and a decent meal. “I have let go of that grief. It was so long ago. But the thought of someone out thereâhungry, hypothermic, hoping someone cares enough to rescue them ⦔ Alone. Afraid. The sudden empathy she felt made a shudder sweep through her. She knew all too well how it felt to look out across a deserted, destroyed landscape and feel utterly alone. Abandoned. “No, I can't give up.”
Micah nodded, then reached out and took her hand. “Dannette, I know you have a huge heart and that you want to help. But you have nearly nothing to go on. You've been out here for three daysâunauthorized, I might add. You've nearly gotten killed, your dog's been injured, and now you're running around in the woods with a dog that is not your property. Your contractâand maybe your reputationâis teetering on a quickly eroding edge, and you're in the company of someone who looks like he's just as likely to take a twelve-inch Peace Keeper blade to your throat. Can I be the voice of reason in your life and say it's time to throw in the towel? Come back to Moose Bend. We'll straighten out this mess with Sheriff Faddenâ”
“What did he say to you?” She yanked her hand away. “Wait, this isn't about Sarah or Missy. Fadden sent you out, didn't he?” She suddenly felt as if he'd taken said dagger and plunged it into her chest.
Micah's face turned grim. “No. I didn't talk to Fadden. I only talked to Sarah. But I can see the writing on the wall here, and I know you're in over your head.”
“I'm following my gut. This girl is out here. I know it. In fact, I think she's been in this cabin.” She looked at him, knowing she wore frustration on her face. “How many times have you had to trust my instincts?” Her voice rose, and for some reason she wanted to cry. She knew her Team Hope cronies considered her the unemotional one, the one who looked at life with steel-edged realism, and the concern on Micah's face told her that he definitely thought she was losing it.
She took a deep breath before she said something that really sounded crazy. Like
Will trusts me; why can't you?
“Is this about Will?” Micah said softly, as if reading her mind.
“Oh, please. You know me better than that. I'm not going to discard my common sense for the first man who smiles at me. I'm not that desperateâ” Only that was
exactly
what it looked like. She wanted to climb under the porch and hide.
Micah touched her arm. “Of course you're not. But Sarah told me you like him. That you'd spent the day with him yesterday.”
“Sarah's very informative,” she snapped. Her throat thickened, especially when Micah scooted closer to her. She felt his sturdy presence close in and braced herself. She didn't need a father, thank you. Still, Micah hadn't been the captain of his Green Beret squad for his blind spots. Sometimes she thought he could look through her as if she were made of gauze.
“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.”
She sighed, leaned against his shoulder. He did have wide, safe shoulders. “I don't know. Maybe I do like him. Will makes me feel safe, and I haven't felt that way for a really, really long time.” She drew away and pulled her knees up as Kirby ran back, dropped the ball at her feet, hunkered down, and began to chew on it. “He sat with me all day yesterday in Missy's kennel, just listening. Really listening, with his eyes and smile, without trying to flirt or make a move on me. Just being a friend.” She gave a rueful chuckle. “He looks a lot different without the Hulk paint.”
Micah grabbed the ball, wrestled with Kirby. “We all do.”
Yeah, without Micah's BDUs or the battle demeanor he usually showed at SAR incidents, he could be a giant teddy bear.
“Just remember,” he said, finally wrenching the ball from Kirby's mouth, chucking it out in the forest. “A heart is a precious thing. When you give it away, you do it 100 percent, and you never get it back whole. So make sure you know what you're getting into.”
Did she have any idea what she was getting into? Not a chance. Still, Will's dedication to this mission, his concern for her protection ⦠that felt like a good prescription for hero in her mind. And the fact that he might be a Christian had seeded all sorts of scenarios. Maybe for once she could stop suspecting him of hidden agendas and simply reach out in trust.
After all, wasn't that what Will did for her? Kept pushing until he shook her defenses? Proving himself despite her restraining-order demeanor?
He deserved her trust.
“Have you asked God about it?” Micah asked softly.
She winced. How had she gone so far into this relationship without consulting the One who knew Will better than anyone?
Only, for the first time since that day in the field when she'd asked for an angel to protect her, she wondered if God was finally answering her prayers.
“You know, this doesn't have to be a one-man show. Micah and I are both trained in search and rescue. Fill us in.”
Will glanced at the sky, at the shadows that stretched across the grass, pooling darkness in the woods. Will felt as if he had a pit bull attached to his leg. How was he supposed to do a perimeter search with this guy tagging along?
With Conner not far behind, Will stalked back to the house, mulling over his options. Options that didn't include Dani or this overzealous duo. “I don't need help,” he said sharply. But doubts tugged at his words. He'd seen Dani's new dog indicate a passive alert, meaning he'd picked up someone's scent. And the pork-and-beans cans evidenced someone's recent presence.
Time ticked down. If he didn't find the girl soon, General Nazar would be discovered, neutralized, and they'd be back to square one, digging through the rubble of their failed mission. Not only that, but somewhere out there Hayata was planning another attack. And soon, if Will read his instincts correctly. No, too much was at stake to disregard Kirby's abilities.
But he couldn't drag Dani along. Not if he didn't want to repeat history. Lew climbed into his mind, along with his words:
“We should wait for the rest of the team.”
Yeah, hindsight was twenty-twenty. And every single time Will relived Lew's death, he heard and obeyed Lew's words. Unfortunately, reality had played out differently. He'd charged ahead, Lew ten loyal steps behind him.
Only ten steps earlier or later, and Lew would have lived. Only ten seconds earlier or later, Lew wouldn't have been trapped under the roof joists while the building collapsed around him.
Only ten steps earlier or later, it would have been Lew who awoke fifteen feet from the rubble. Will still fought the screams embedded in his brainâLew's screamsâas Will dragged him out of the flames only to watch him die in his arms.
He couldn't be the guy who dragged Dani to her death. He stopped, turned, and gave Conner a hard look. “Just keep your word. Pack up Dani first thing in the morning and take her home. Please.”
Conner frowned but said nothing as he started to move past Will.
Will clamped a hand on Conner's shoulder. “Please.” Only his tone didn't plead.
Conner shook out of his grip and stared at him. Then, finally, “Someday we're going to know what is going on, right?”
Will looked past him, to the enclosure of forest, listening to the frogs serenade the approaching twilight. “Not if I'm successful.”
Conner didn't blink, didn't move. “Okay, we'll leave first thing in the morning. We'll bed down here tonight. Dannette will sleep in the cabin. You and Micah and I will take turns at patrol.”
Will managed a crisp nod. He'd take the last watch, and then, before dawn crested the sky, he'd sneak out with Kirby.
He crossed to the front of the cabin. Something twisted inside him when he spied Dani sitting on the porch, hands clasped around her drawn-up legs, sitting closer than necessary to her large and overzealous friend Micah. And the soft smile on her face made Will's jealous heart ride to his throat and lodge there.
She welcomed Kirby as he bounded onto the porch, then ran one of her strong hands into his fur as she picked up the slimy ball he'd dropped and pitched it back into the forest. She belonged here in the woods, amid the trees, fighting the elements, courage in her step. But she had a softness with her animals that dug up all his longings.
Today it had nearly made him confess. He'd almost told her that he wasn't a reporter. He was just a guy trying to do a jobâone that included lying to her. He even saw himself dropping to his knees, heard himself pleading for forgiveness.
And then, oh joy, in his imagination he'd seen her face crumple and heard the resounding whack across his cheek.
He took a deep breath. Obviously, he'd let her creep in under his defenses, something that the arrival of her friends/ thugs only made painfully clear.
Where was the guy who said he'd never let a woman in his life for longer than twelve hours? He cringed even as he thought it. He wasn't that guy anymore.
Conner strolled up behind him as they reached the cabin. “I think we should tuck in here tonight, head back to town in the morning,” he said to Micah.
Dani gazed at Will. “Are you serious?”
He didn't look at her; instead he trudged up the steps, into the cabin. Behind him, he heard Conner fill Micah in on the details. Why did he feel slightly sick? This was best for Dani. To go home and now. But her friends would have to hog-tie her and throw her over their shoulders when she discovered he'd taken her dog.
He felt like a jerk.
Putting down his weapon, he walked into the back bedroom, closed the window, and surveyed the room for anything out of place ⦠like a terrorist?
He wasn't hiding from Daniâhe
wasn't
.
Dani stood in the kitchen when he came out. Her hands were folded over her chest. “You're giving up?”
“I want you to go home, Dani,” he said, opening the pantry. Three cans of corn, a jar of pickles, and a box of saltines in a Tupperware container. No mice droppings. He was aware that they were trespassing, so he made a mental note to find out who owned this cabin and write them a healthy check, along with his apologies.
“So the search is over. You're going to believe Fadden?”
“Yes.” For her, the search was over.
She sighed, said nothing as she opened the cupboard, found a stack of paper plates. “I'm just surprised, that's all.”
Get in line
. She wasn't the only one surprised. He couldn't believe, for example, that he hadn't tried to kiss her, not even once. Or that he'd let his guard down and let her inside his grief. Or even that now he planned on breaking her heart and stealing her dog. No, actually he shouldn't be surprised about thatâsometimes things had to be sacrificed for the nation.
Like, perhaps, his heart.
They all sat at the small table and shared a meager dinnerâtwo MREs from Will's pack, plus the pickles, cold corn, and saltines. Conner had gone to the lake for water and filled up their canteens.
Dani retired early into the back bedroom, closing the door without a word while something inside Will died a little. No, a little
more
.
Perhaps he'd been wishing for another campfire chat like they'd had three nights ago. One that might end with some stargazing, maybe with her getting chilly and needing a strong, warm armâ