Eternal (33 page)

“Good, good,” he said. There was a long pause.

“Zander, are you there?” I asked.

“Yes.”

Another pause. I was beginning to get worried.
This silence disturbed me.

“Zander, you are staring to scare me. What’s
up?”

“Well, I have some things I need to tell you.”

“Okay, shoot,” I said. I giggled because this
would be something
Chandler
would say.

“Where are you? Are you someplace you can
actually talk?” Zander asked.

“Yes. Why?”

“Well, it’s Cayden,” he said. Immediately my
heart sank through my feet, hit the ground with an audible
thwap
and my
voice shot up three octaves.

“Is he okay? What happened?”

“Yes Winter, calm down. He is perfectly fine.
Well, I would be lying by saying perfectly, but he is physically fine.”

I sighed a breath of relief, but it was going to
take a moment for my heart to restart.

“Winter, you need to know Dane got out of the
hospital and did come after Cayden.”

“What!” I screamed.

“Winter, please calm down. I told you Cayden is
fine.”

“Zander, give me a minute.”

I dropped the phone from my ear while I pulled
air into my lungs. I felt like I would hyperventilate. I found a bench and sat
down.

“Okay,” I said, “I’m back.”

“Winter, please calm down,” Zander instructed.

“I am calm.” I lied.

“I need you to breathe and relax.”

I took in a deep breath. “I am breathing,” I
assured.

“Dane was killed.”

“Killed?” I echoed.

“Yes. He broke onto the
Vancouver
set while we were filming. He tried
to attack Cayden; of course, you need to know he did not even come close to
Cayden. He was stopped by Race and Langdon. Jayden was more than upset he
wasn’t there when Race and Langdon took him down. Jayden had been sent to
secure the on-location shoot. Cayden was finishing up on the closed set, so he
was going to head over to the library portion of the shoot. Jayden wanted a
piece of Dane, badly.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Jayden said he wanted to make Dane feel the
pain for what he had done to you and for making you leave to protect Cayden.”

I never told
Jayden I was leaving to protect Cayden.

“He said that?”

“Yes,” Zander replied.

“I never told Jayden about my reasons for
leaving,” I admitted.

“Some of us are observant, Winter. Jayden knew
why you left.”

“You said Dane was killed. How was he killed?”

“Due to the recent more specific threats to
Cayden, the police were also on set. When they took over, Dane broke loose from
them. He grabbed a gun he had tucked inside the leg of his pants, and he shot
himself.”

My hands were shaking like a leaf. The idea of a
knife or a gun being wielded at Cayden flashed across my closed eyes. “Cayden
was not near, was he?”

“No, Winter.”

I felt my lungs breathe with this news.

“I am sorry to hear Dane was killed. He was a
sick man. I was hoping he would get some help. But I’m beyond ecstatic to know
Cayden was not hurt. You know, someone hurting him has been my greatest fear.
That is the real reason I left. I had to do what I could to protect Cayden. If
I was gone, out of the picture, Dane would have no reason to harm Cayden or at
least that’s what I thought. I guess my leaving did not protect Cayden after
all.”

“I know.” Zander’s voice became quieter. “You
need to know I have told all of it to Cayden. I had to. He had been so
distraught. You have no idea what your leaving did to him.”

“I think I do know,” I admitted, because I knew
what it had done to me.
Had been?
I pondered that for a second. “Wait,
you said had been distraught.”

“Yes, he is better now.”

“Better?” I questioned.

Zander sounded strange in his reply as he said,
“Yes.”

“When you say you have told him all of it, what
do you mean?”

 
Zander
cleared his throat. “Ahem…I told him about our conversations in
New York
, your fears and
your need to protect him even at the cost of your heart and his. I told him you
knew he would never let you go, so you had to make it seem like you needed to
go, that you knew he could not stop you from what you needed. I told him you
knew he would not stop you from what you wanted. You, of course, knew if going
kept you alive and protected you from his crazy world than he would allow you
to go, to protect you. I told Cayden you never wanted to leave, that you would
have stayed within the craziness, lived with the cameras, the paparazzi, the
long hours he was away because you were strong enough to handle it.”

 
Zander
became quiet. He must have thought I was too quiet. I was speechless.

“Winter?” he asked.

“I’m here,” I confessed.

“I told Cayden you lied about your need for a
normal life. You lied about your need to leave. I told Cayden how scared you
were for his safety, so when Dane made the death threats you broke your own
heart to keep him safe. I told him how the possibility of losing him in that
way was too much. How you would rather lose him by walking away and know he
lived, rather than being selfish and watch someone go after him because of you.
I told him when you said you could not fight any more you were lying. I told
him you were fighting for his life. I told Cayden the truth, Winter, which is
you love him. I told him you still love him, and everything you have done has
been for him. Just as everything he has done has been for you.” Zander paused
for a moment, his booming voice softened. “You know, Winter, Cayden broke his
heart to save you, too.”

As Zander spoke, I felt my tears well up then
spill over. “I know,” I replied.

“And then there is the other thing,” Zander
said.

“What other thing?” I asked.

“The baby.”

My heart sink. I think I stopped blinking.

“What?”

“Winter, I know about the baby. I know you are
trying to protect Cayden, and his baby.”

“How do you….” I lost my voice, stunned.

“Along with your mysterious extending flu sickness,
Melissa told me about the prenatal vitamins she picked up for you from the
pharmacy. It does not take a rocket scientist to figure it out.”

“Zander….” I broke down, my tears turning into
sobs.

“Winter, you need to calm down. A woman in your
condition does not need to get so upset.” He chuckled. “Breathe, Winter.
Relax.”

I took in another deep breath in an attempt to
gain better control. “I am breathing,” I said again.

I heard Zander chuckle. “Good. Now, are you
calmer?” he asked.

“Yes,” I admitted. “Zander, does Melissa know
everything, too?”

“Yes. She had suspected but put it together
after she saw what it was she picked up for you from the pharmacy. She snuck a
look. She felt bad for peeking into the bag, but she confessed to me so both of
us knew the entire situation at that point.”

“But when Melissa calls me she never says
anything about the baby or even acts like she knows the truth.”

“I know. Most of the time when she called you,
Cayden was listening. It was at Cayden’s request. She has always felt guilty
about that as well.”

“Cayden was listening?” I said, shocked. I
remembered the day in the dressing room, before the premiere, when Melissa was
talking to Cayden and put the phone to my ear so I could hear him, too.

“Yes, he had to know you were all right. I think
he would have gone over the edge without those calls from Melissa. It was
Cayden’s lifeline.”

I shouldn’t
be surprised to hear Cayden had been checking on me the entire time.

“Winter, listen to me. Cayden is coming to see
you. There is no way to stop him. He has already left from
Vancouver
.”

“Zander, he is still filming. He cannot do that,
the contracts.”

“No. The primary filming has wrapped in
Vancouver
, and the studio
released him from his last contract. He has no intention of signing any other
contracts either.”

I sat silent for a moment.

“Winter, are you still there?”

“Yes.” I paused. “Why did the studio release
him?”

“I believe after listening to you in
New York
and then to see
what you did in order to make Cayden’s life easier touched Mackenzie’s heart. I
was surprised he actually had a heart but miracles happen every day.”

“So there are no more filming obligations?”

“No. Cayden is free from those obligations.”

“Zander, when you said Cayden is coming to me,
what do you mean? How does he know where I am?”

“Winter, give me some credit, will you? If I
could find you in
Colorado
, I could find you
in
England
,”
he mused. “You are not as hard to find as you might think.”

“Zander, thank you.”

“Anytime,” Zander replied. “You know what a
sucker I am for a good romance.” He laughed. “You and Cayden belong together,
of this I am convinced. Now go home. I can hear the traffic.” He chuckled.
“Wait for Cayden, tell him how much you love him and live the life you have
always been destined to live, Winter.” Zander hung up the phone.

I sat silent for a few moments, there on my
little bench as people passed me by, desperately trying to wrap my mind around
this whole thing. Everyone seemed to be more aware of my life than I was even
aware. It was strange to think Cayden was coming here then I worried about what
I was going to say. While I only did what I did to protect Cayden, I had so
much to make up for, including the fact I’d never told him about the baby. He
found out in such a horrible way. Every time I made up my mind to tell Cayden,
something interfered. When I heard Dane wanted to kill him over me, I made the
choice to protect him, not tell him about the baby. I wondered what Cayden
said, how he acted when Zander told him he was going to be a father.

What would Cayden do when he saw me? I imagined
the expression of anger on his face followed by the look of total
disappointment. Perhaps he would be livid, furious? Possibly he’d yell because
I lied, hid the truth from him about the baby? Maybe I deserved to be yelled
at? Cayden might look at me and believe I was evil and cruel. Could he remember
why he had ever loved me? Had I made too many mistakes?

Maybe?

Chapter Twenty

My Destiny

I made my way back to my flat, standing on my
doorstep with my key in hand when I heard a strange
buzzing
of voices.
The voices became louder, more distinct.

Ackerly said, “Philomena.”

I turned to see Ackerly and Philomena standing
on the front stoop of their flat. Ackerly was smiling. Philomena was holding
her hands to her heart. I froze for a moment.
Cayden.
I felt him. The pull. His gaze on me. I turned around on my
stoop, watching as if the parting of the
Red Sea
.
People were moving from the sidewalk. I glanced down the long span of
concrete….

There before my incredulous eyes I saw Jayden
and Langdon. They were flanking each side of Cayden, who was standing still,
looking at me as though he had seen a ghost. I stood silent and stared at him.
Cayden’s face flashed a new emotion. He smiled his most breathtaking smile. The
white of his teeth glimmered at me. My heart sank through my feet, my heartbeat
increased, and without thought as though it were a reflex reaction, I ran.

In that moment I found the man I loved, the soul
that would always be a part of my soul, the beating of my own heart. I sprinted
toward the man I loved, had always loved and would always love. As soon as I
saw Cayden every fear, every worry, and every pain left as though we had never
been apart. Our worlds, our spheres were finely one, no longer separate. I was
whole again as if I’d never been broken.

I leapt. Cayden caught me. I wrapped my arms
around his neck, and my feet dangled from the ground. Placing my nose into the
hollow of his neck, I breathed. Took in the luscious sent of him, springtime
rain, fresh and inviting with a mix of sweet tempting musk and a bite of hot
spice. I started to kiss his neck, his jaw, and finally kissed his perfect
lips.

“I am so sorry, Cayden. I’m sorry. Can you ever
forgive me for what I have done to us?”

There in my ear was his voice that was smooth
like silk, sweet like honey and warm like velvet. “Baby, you have nothing to be
sorry for, there is nothing to forgive. I love you, Winter. I have always loved
you, and I will always love you. You are the beating of my heart.” He removed
the clip from my hair, allowing my hair to fall down my back. He combed his
fingers through it and kissed me. My world spun….