Evening Stars (17 page)

“What do you think?” Bonnie asked Cindy, then told her the story of how she came to own it. She pointed to the tiny writing on the frame. “Evening Stars. That’s the title of the painting. Which is ridiculous. There aren’t any stars.”

Cindy frowned. “I agree it’s not my taste, but there’s something familiar about it. I should do some research.” She peered at the signature. “Hmm, I wonder who did this.”

“Someone famous would be nice,” Averil told her. “Please find out it’s worth more than a dollar.”

Cindy smiled. “I’ll do my best.”

They finished unloading the van. Just before they climbed in to head home, Nina grabbed Averil’s arm.

“I’m sorry about before. Snapping at you. Sometimes with my friends...” She felt herself flushing. “It’s just you’re so fun and I have a lot of rules.”

Averil studied her. “They’re
your
friends. They’re not going to like me more.”

“You can’t know that.”

“You’re a nut.”

“Yeah, well, speaking of that, thanks for the brownies.”

Averil smiled. “Later you can tell me the details of your hot monkey-sex night.”

They returned home to find the house smelling of roast and baking potatoes—a traditional Wentworth celebration dinner. There would also be glazed carrots, homemade rolls and, since Bertie had joined the family, German Chocolate Cake.

“I’m going to weigh five pounds more in the morning,” Averil said with a sigh. “But it will so be worth it.”

Nina had to agree. She quickly changed into clean jeans and a short-sleeved T-shirt, then went into the kitchen.

Bertie and Bonnie stood next to each other, Bonnie’s hand on her lover’s shoulder. They looked like what they were—a happy couple spending an evening together. Nina supposed there were some who would be uncomfortable with a lesbian mother, but Nina was pleased with Bonnie’s choice. Bertie added a level of stability to their family that had been missing. Her only regret was that Bertie hadn’t shown up sooner.

“We bought wine,” Bonnie said, holding up an open bottle. “We’re all going to get a little tipsy tonight.”

“I like it when we party,” Averil said as she walked into the kitchen. “I’ll pour.”

When everyone had a glass, they toasted each other.

“We have about a half hour before everything is ready,” Bertie said. “Let’s go in the living room and talk.”

They did as she suggested, each taking their proscribed places. Bertie and Bonnie next to each other on the sofa, Nina in the overstuffed chair and Averil on the ottoman. These had been their places for years, Nina thought. Like most family traditions, these were well-worn and difficult to escape.

Bonnie tucked her feet under her. Nina studied her mother. Bonnie was young—forty-six. She’d gotten pregnant while still in high school. Babies having babies, Nina thought. She supposed it wasn’t Bonnie’s fault she hadn’t been ready to be a parent. Of course she’d never bothered growing into the role, either.

Nina recognized that she was at the other end of the spectrum. Thirty and still not married. Not even close to finding someone. While Kyle was the answer to every spinster’s dreams, he wasn’t exactly a long-term proposition. His stay was temporary, and when he moved on, she wasn’t going with him. Not that he’d asked, but her life was here. And even if it wasn’t... Not a subject for tonight, she thought.

But if not Kyle, then who? Dylan? He was swoon-worthy, in his own way. Successful, dependable. Not that he was begging to sweep her off her feet, either. No, a man wasn’t the way out. She had to find her own happiness.

She sipped on her wine and wondered where she’d gone wrong. If she’d been asked ten years ago, she would have said that of course by now she would have the career of her dreams. That she would get married and have kids. She would never have believed that she would be in exactly the same place. How had that happened?

“When did you get here?” Bonnie asked, patting the cushion next to her so that Penny jumped up and joined her. “And where did this beautiful little girl come from?”

Penny gazed lovingly into Bonnie’s eyes.

Averil told the story of finding Penny at the rest stop and rescuing her.

“You poor thing,” Bonnie told the dog. “What horrible person would have done that? Bertie, do we know anyone who does curses? Whoever abandoned her should be cursed.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Bertie said calmly. “You never said why you came for a visit.” Bertie directed that comment to Averil. “Is everything all right?”

“Ask Kevin,” Nina murmured, which earned her a glare from her sister.

“I needed some time to think.”

Bonnie continued to stroke Penny. “Without your husband? Is there a problem at home?”

Averil deliberately turned away from Nina. “Everything is fine,” she said brightly. “He’s okay with me being here. I just need to figure some things out.”

“Like what?” Nina asked, not sure why she was bugging her sister, but finding pleasure in the act.

Averil sighed heavily. “Just things, Nina. You wouldn’t understand, what with not being married or even in a relationship.”

“At least I’m not running away.”

Averil turned toward her. “No, you’re not. But that would require you leaving the island. Something you seem unable to do.”

Bonnie looked at Bertie. “Help,” she said. “They’re fighting.”

Bertie sipped her wine. “Girls, is this necessary on our first night back?”

“Of course not,” Nina said, wishing she’d kept her mouth shut. She didn’t know why she felt compelled to needle Averil. It never accomplished anything. Yet the urge was often powerful.

“Nina started it,” Averil said.

“That’s mature,” Nina told her.

“There you go again. You start it, then have to have the last word. Don’t you have enough to do in your life? I’d think you were too busy already, what with being critical of everyone and then telling them what to do. With all your free time, you should think about volunteering.”

“My free time? I have a job with responsibilities. A lot of us can’t simply disappear when the mood strikes. What are you thinking, taking off like you did? Kevin’s a great guy.”

Averil spun to face her. “Better than I deserve, right? That’s what you think.”

“He’s certainly patient. You’ve already been gone a week. How long are you staying?”

“You don’t get to ask that. This is my home as much as yours.”

“I’m not saying you should leave,” Nina told her. “I’m asking how long you expect him to wait for you to discover yourself. Because that’s what this is about. You and your needs. When is it about Kevin?”

“Stay out of my marriage,” Averil told her. “It’s not your area of expertise.”

Nina watched as Bonnie and Bertie got up and left the room. Penny trailed after them.

“Great. Now you’ve driven them away.”

Averil turned and stared at the empty sofa. She returned her attention to Nina. “Right. It’s my fault. For someone so big on everyone else being responsible, you sure don’t see what’s lacking in yourself.”

“And you’re so quick to blame me for what’s wrong, just like you used to. Can’t figure out if you should have a kid? I’m the reason. Don’t know what to do about your marriage? It’s big, bad Nina who messed that up. Let me guess—I’m the reason you’re not writing your novel, too. I come into your room at night and suck out all your creative energy. It must be nice to never have to take personal responsibility.”

Averil sprang to her feet. Tears filled her blue eyes. “I can’t believe you threw having a baby in my face. That’s low, even for you.”

She stomped out of the room.

Nina stayed in her chair, aware that all she wanted was to feel connected, and all she’d done was drive everyone away.

* * *

“I hate her,” Averil said into her cell as she wiped away tears. “She’s so sanctimonious.”

Kevin was quiet for a second. “What happened?”

“She’s mean and blames me for everything. I don’t understand. What is her problem? Do you think it’s because she doesn’t have a life? She steps in and handles everything for everyone else all the time. Which would be nice, but there’s a price. You have to do it Nina’s way or else.”

“Maybe that’s an easier solution. You get to do what you want and have a scapegoat.”

She sniffed. “Do you mean in general or are you talking about me?”

“You don’t like taking responsibility.”

Averil stiffened. “That’s not fair. What don’t I take responsibility for?”

“You told me you were ready to start a family, and then you accused me of pressuring you. You keep talking about your novel, but I’m not sure you’ve even started it. You’re running away from our relationship, and I have no idea why.”

She sucked in a breath as fresh tears spilled down her cheeks. “What? Do you keep a list of my flaws in your pocket?”

“I was answering the question. Averil, think about it. You do like to blame other people for your mistakes.”

“Fine. If I’m so awful, why do you want to have a baby with me?”

“And now you’re trying to distract me from the main point.”

“I have to go.”

She pushed the end button on her cell phone and tossed it on the bed. She’d already pulled the box of tissues close, and now she pulled two free and blew her nose.

What was wrong with everyone? Was it “be mean” day? She stared at her phone, waiting for it to ring. The seconds ticked by. She grabbed the cell, hit the call button and waited for Kevin to pick up.

“I’m here,” he said, sounding weary.

“What is this about?” she demanded. “What’s really going on? If you don’t want to be with me, just say so. I don’t want to play these games.”

She braced herself for him to say she loved the games, which might be true but wasn’t the point. Instead he sighed.

Something cold and snakelike coiled in her belly. The sensation made her want to run hard and fast, and it was only when she stood up to bolt that she realized the chill came from fear.

Because until this second it had never occurred to her that she could lose her husband in all this. That Kevin might not wait for her forever. That he might be weary of the drama and actually like that she was gone.

“Kevin?”

“You like to make excuses, and I get tired of that,” he told her. “You’re a good person, Averil. Just look at how you took on Penny. But I want you to be a grown-up with me. I want us to have a partnership. I want to know I can depend on you, Averil. I love you and I want to stay with you. But I don’t know if that’s what you want and I won’t be in this alone. You need to think about what’s important. I know you need time and I’m willing to give it to you, but I won’t wait forever. Good night.”

With that, he was gone. She dropped the phone on the bed, then stretched out next to it. There were still tears, but there was also confusion and a nagging sense of having missed something very important.

Chapter Twelve

“I’M SORRY,” NINA said later that evening, after the dishes had been washed and Averil had retreated to her room.

She was once again curled up in the big chair with Bonnie and Bertie on the sofa. Penny lay next to Bonnie, her new BFF.

“I let her get to me and I don’t know why,” Nina continued.

“She frustrates you,” Bertie said. “You’re used to taking care of her, and that’s hard to let go. Now that you’re both older, you want to simply be sisters, but the old patterns creep into your conversations. You get parental, she rebels and there’s fighting.”

“It’s my fault,” Bonnie said, petting Penny’s side. “But as you both know, I’m not entirely stable.”

Acknowledgment followed by excuses, Nina thought, unable to summon any energy on the topic. She had a feeling her mother would never change. Everybody loved Bonnie—she was fun to be around and always game for whatever was exciting and new. A great trait in a friend, but a lousy one in a mother.

Nina knew she reacted by being the opposite. Not fun and disinterested in anything spontaneous. Which made her sound like the best date ever, she thought grimly.

“Either way, it’s good to have you two back,” Nina said, hoping the change of topic would get those kinds of thoughts out of her head.

“It’s good to be back,” her mother told her. “I adore Cindy. She’s done so well with the store. She has a good eye.” She nudged Bertie. “I told you those dolls were worth something.”

“Yes, you did.”

Bonnie tucked her hair behind her ear. “We saw dolls on this trip, but they were too scary for me. Those little porcelain hands. You know they’re going to come alive in the night and scoop out our brains.”

“I assume you mean the entire doll and not just the hands.”

Bonnie wrinkled her nose. “It’s not like one is better than the other.” She turned to Nina. “Did I tell you that you were right about the tires? As soon as it started snowing, I told Bertie ‘Nina was right. We should have replaced the tires.’”

Bertie nodded. “I was trying to keep up on the road, but when it’s slick, that old van drives like a bathtub.”

Bonnie smiled at her. “You kept us safe. You always do.”

“Thank you.” Bertie looked at Nina. “How are you holding up? There have been a lot of changes.”

“Just Averil and Penny. And Penny isn’t any trouble.”

Bertie laughed. “Meaning Averil is? She can be a handful. But I didn’t mean just that. What about Dylan being back?”

Nina thought about seeing him. “I knew he was returning. I didn’t know when.” She told Bertie about her car and the rescue. “I was humiliated, but he was nice.”

“Any chemistry?” Bonnie asked. “Chemistry is important.”

“So is stability,” Bertie said gently. “Finding someone you can depend on.”

Bonnie sighed. “Yes, that’s important, too.”

“No chemistry,” Nina said. “Dylan and I are friends. What we had was a long time ago.”

Bertie studied her. “You’d promised to tell me about the new man in your life. If not Dylan, then who?”

Nina did her best not to squirm. “His name is Kyle.” She felt herself starting to smile. “It’s crazy. He’s four years younger and a fighter pilot. I used to babysit his sister. He was maybe twelve. For a whole summer he followed me around and told anyone who would listen that he was in love with me. It was kind of a joke. I barely remembered him.”