Authors: Valerie Hansen
She glanced down at the angelic little boy seated beside her and smiled. He was a doll, the kind of well-behaved, eager-to-please child who brought out her maternal instincts and made her want to protect him. Too bad the would-be hood who had clobbered him hadn't had the same kind of good upbringing.
The other boys marched up to the table and quickly took their places while Roxy flirted with Aaron in the background.
James remained standing and glared down at Megan. “Don't you
ever
do that again.”
“Do what?”
“Leave the boys unsupervised. When I tell you to watch them, I mean
watch
them.”
She got to her feet to face him on more equal ground. “Oh, come on. They were just washing their hands. Zac said he'd take care of the littler ones, and it looks to me like he did a fine job.”
“That's not the point. You didn't follow orders.”
“I'm sorry, okay. I guess I wasn't thinking.”
“You can say that again.”
“You don't have to yell at me.”
“I'm not yelling.”
“Well, you sure could have fooled me.”
Inez was entering the room, bearing a platter heaped with crispy fried chicken. Megan let her pass, then grabbed James's arm and tugged him toward the kitchen. When he resisted, she scowled. “Come with me. I want to settle this in private. It won't take long.”
He gave in reluctantly and followed her through the door. “It better not.”
Megan whirled, her voice husky, her eyes blazing. “Don't you dare threaten me.”
“I wasn't. I didn't.” James gestured back toward the dining room. “What do you have to say to me that couldn't be said just as easily in there?”
“Plenty.”
She couldn't believe he didn't realize what he'd done, what he was still doing by not lowering his voice and confronting her as quietly as possible, so she set an example by rasping at him in a near whisper, “You told me not to question your authority in front of the kids, yet you just made me look like a fool in front of those boysâand my sister.”
“I did not.”
“You most certainly did,” Megan insisted. “Everybody makes mistakes. Even me. I was joking
when I told you I thought I was perfect. From now on, if you have anything derogatory to say to me, I'll expect you to say it in private.”
One eyebrow arched. He gave a slight shrug and spoke more softly. “All right. I'll spell it out for you. These kids may look angelic but many of them are seriously disturbed. One at a time they're usually pretty agreeable. In a group, anything can happenâand often does.”
“You mean I'm supposed to treat them like they're in jail?”
“Not exactly. When one of them merits trust we give it, up to a point. Next time you're not sure whether or not to permit something, ask me or Aaron about it first and we'll avoid problems like this.”
“That sounds reasonable enough.” Megan chanced a slight smile. “I'm sorry I caused you extra worry. I thought my decision to let Zac take them to wash up was perfectly logical.”
“I know. It's partly my fault, too. I should have warned you these kids would try to bamboozle you big-time. You've learned that on your own, I take it.”
“No kidding. Talk about a trial by fire.”
“Everything turned out okay. We'll forget it ever happened. Now, let's go eat before the kids
get so hungry we have a mutiny on our hands.” He pushed open the swinging door between the kitchen and dining room and held it politely. “After you.”
To Megan, the most amazing thing was his apparently complete change of mood. In the blink of an eye, James Harris had gone from delivering angry retorts to being a gracious host. She frowned at him as she passed, unsure if she was reading him right. While her stomach was still tied in knots and her hands were trembling from their encounter, he seemed calm, totally in control.
Everyone stared at them as they left the kitchen together. James headed for his normal spot at the head of the table, escorting her as he went.
Megan slid into the place where she'd been sitting, directly to James's right, because it was the only available space. There was no gracious way to move away from him as she had on the porch. Therefore, she figured she'd better follow his example and start acting more normal or the boys might get the idea they could pit them against each other again.
Seated beside Aaron and Roxy at the opposite end of the long table, Inez quietly bowed her head. Megan was expecting someone to say a blessing on their meal but no one spoke. They simply ob
served a quiet moment while she used the time to pull herself together.
When everyone suddenly looked up and began talking, she felt much better, much more at ease. She decided to break her silence and let James know she'd simmered down by asking him a question. “You don't say grace?”
“Can't. Separation of church and state,” he said. “The silent prayer was Inez's idea. So far, nobody's questioned us about it. Most folks are pretty tolerant out here in the sticks. It's when the kids go home that we may hear complaints.”
“I see.” Megan lowered her voice for privacy, though she wasn't too worried about being overheard above the boisterous conversation going on at the table. “Speaking of home, tell me about Bobby Joe. What's his situation?”
“He's temporary, like all the others. I'll give you access to our files as soon as you set up your computer.”
“What about Zac? Why do you let him pick on Bobby Joe so much?”
James chuckled. “
Let
him? Not hardly. I do my best to keep them apart. Being brothers, they naturally gravitate to each other.”
“Brothers?” Megan was flabbergasted. “Those two are related? They're not a bit alike.”
“Lots of siblings aren't,” he said, offering her the platter of chicken before taking any for himself. “My brothers are far different than I am.”
“Oh? How so?”
Passing the mashed potatoes and picking up the bowl of green beans, he spooned some onto his plate. “They were always perfect saints. Sons to make their parents proud.”
“And you weren't?”
James chuckled. “According to my folks I was the exact opposite. I got tired of not being able to live up to their ideals, gave up trying and let them think what they wanted.”
“I'll bet they'd be proud of your work here.”
“I don't care one way or the other. It's enough to know I'm doing the right thing. I don't need validation from them or anyone else.”
Nodding, Megan sighed. At the far end of the table, her sister was carrying on an animated conversation with Aaron Barnes, leaning close and fawning over him. The poor guy was blushing, obviously embarrassed by all the extra attention.
Megan shared the young man's discomfort. Though she felt sorry for James because of his estrangement from his family, there were times, like now, when she wished she didn't have to worry about anyone but herself, either. To make matters
worse, James was also watching the young people. Judging by the look of consternation on his face, he wasn't any happier about their interaction than she was.
Softly, Megan said, “I'll take care of that as soon as Roxy and I are alone. She'll back off. I promise.”
James, who had been taking a sip of ice water as she spoke, looked incredulous, burst into laughter and promptly choked.
Megan slapped him on the back. “Serves you right. It wasn't
that
funny.”
“Yes, it was,” he managed, while coughing into his napkin. “I can just picture that little sisterly talk.”
“I'll expect you to speak to your helper about it, too,” Megan added. “We can't put all the burden of good behavior on my sister.”
James coughed again, finally getting his irritated throat under control. When he lowered the napkin he was grinning like he'd just heard the best joke of his life and was still chortling over the punch line.
“Okay,” Megan said, “what's so amusing?”
“You are. Anybody who thinks she can convince a fifteen-year-old girl to stop making eyes at a good-looking college boy is out of her ever-lovin' mind.”
T
he remainder of the meal passed rapidly for Megan. She took part in the boys' lively discussions as much as possible, hoping to gain insight into each of their characters, while trying to keep an eye on her sister, as well.
By the end of the evening she had decided that all but the two littlest boys were better actors than most Academy Award winnersâand those two were strong runners-up. Listening to them chatter, observing their innocent expressions, she would never have guessed that their short lives had been filled with enough trauma and adversity to overwhelm most adults.
Megan didn't realize how exhausted she was, both mentally and physically, until the evening meal and kitchen cleanup had ended. If James
hadn't followed her out onto the porch, expressed a desire to speak with her in private and asked her to wait there while he located Aaron and turned his charges over to him, she would have loaded her flirtatious sister into the truck and headed straight home.
Regrettably, she'd been so bumfuzzled by James's surprising request, she hadn't been able to come up with one single plausible excuse to leave immediately.
Instead, she'd simply nodded and said, “Okay. I haven't seen Roxy in the past few minutes, either. I imagine when you find your helper, you'll find her, too. Tell her I'm about ready to go, will you?”
“Sure.”
She plunked down on a comfortable-looking padded glider and gave it a push with her feet. Fireflies flashed pale green as they rose randomly from the forest floor, making nearby bushes look as if they were decorated with twinkle lights. Frogs along the river started to croak.
Enthralled by the aura of peace, Megan yawned and fought to stay alert. If James didn't join her soon, the smooth back-and-forth swinging was liable to put her to sleep. It prompted memories of the old glider where she and Roxy had often met
to share secrets and giggle over silly nothings when they were girls.
Poor Roxy. Where was she going to choose to live when these two weeks were over? Megan didn't want to interfere in her sister's choices, she simply wanted everyone in their family to get along. Was that too much to ask?
Senses lulled, she sighed and closed her eyes.
James's softly spoken “Are you asleep?” made her jump.
Her eyes flew open. “Oh! You startled me.”
“Sorry.”
He joined her on the glider just as he had on the porch of the old cabin, apparently not aware of her desire to keep her distance.
Trying to inch away without making a big deal of it, Megan scooted left as far as possible and folded her arms across her chest. “It's okay. I was just resting my eyes.”
“Since you weren't snoring, I'll buy that excuse.” He concentrated on the way she was rubbing her upper arms with her hands. “Are you cold? I can loan you a jacket if you want. It gets kind of chilly when the sun goes down.”
“I have a jacket in the truck if I need one. I'm fine. Really. Just a few goose bumps.”
Probably
caused more by sitting out here with you than by air temperature.
“Did you find my sister?”
“Uh-huh. I left her with Aaron and the boys so you and I could talk. They're all watching a kids' movie.”
“That sounds safe enough.” She hid another yawn behind her hand.
“I didn't mean to keep you up past your bedtime. Are you sure you'll be okay driving home? It's a long way to Little Rock.”
“Actually, I only have to drive as far as Bald Knob, but thanks for asking. It's not the time on the clock that's getting to me, it's the effort we put out today. You're a tough guy to keep up with when you set your mind to finishing something.”
“I could say the same for you. Neither one of us would have had to work so hard if you'd been reasonable about taking another cabin, you know.”
“Give it a rest, Harris. My aches and pains are well worth it. That cabin is perfect.”
“Okay. So, what else will you need? Besides decent furniture, I mean.”
“Well, right now I could use a big bottle of horse liniment.” She chuckled at the silly look on his face. “Just kidding. Actually, I'm looking forward to buying some pretty curtains, maybe bringing a few things from home, too. If you can
provide a couple of beds and a dresser, I think I can come up with the rest.”
“Will cots do?”
“Minus the mice, sure.” Megan grinned at him. “I don't think I could get Roxy to sleep there if she thought we were still knee-deep in vermin.”
He made a face. “It wasn't that bad. Besides, you're the one who insisted on living in a barn.”
“Storage shed, but never mind. Just do the best you can. I'll cope.”
“I was planning on giving you a brand-new frame and mattress. I think I can come up with a second one for your sister.”
“Thanks.”
“You're welcome.”
With a deep, relaxing sigh, he planted his feet and gave the swing an extrafirm push, then said, “I wanted to talk to you alone because I wanted to tell you what a good job you did this evening. The boys like you.”
“I like them, too. They're an interesting bunch. I'm looking forward to reading their files.”
“How soon will you need the furniture?”
“Before Monday, if you can manage it.”
“I think I can. I still need to run safety checks on the plumbing and wiring. And I want to make sure the space between the rafters and the ceiling
isn't full of surprises, like wasp nests. Once that's done, you'll be free to take possession.”
“Sounds great.” Megan got to her feet and faced him. “Well, was that all you wanted?”
“No.” He joined her, stepped closer, then stopped as she edged away. Looking contrite, he jammed his hands into his pockets. “Actually, I want to apologize, too.”
“What for?” She managed to maintain a respectable distance by continuing to back up, even though her thumping heart insisted she was still far too close to him.
“Pick a reason.”
Megan placed a finger against her cheek and struck a pose as if thinking. “Wow. So many choices. Where should I begin?”
“You could start with my general attitude,” he said, half smiling.
“Good choice!”
“You don't have to rub it in.”
“Okay. Apology accepted.”
“Thanks. Look, I realize I was out of line when I reprimanded you in front of the boys. I'll probably make other mistakes, too. If I do, I'll keep saying I'm sorry. But I don't apologize for taking my job seriouslyâfor taking these
kids
seriously. I'm all they've got.”
Megan found herself smiling at him as if he were a lovable but none-too-bright pup instead of an educated colleague.
“Not anymore, you're not,” she countered. “Now, they've got me, too.”
Â
Unusually alert during the long drive home, Megan assumed that her fatigue was simply on hold and waiting to take over as soon as Roxy was through chattering about Aaron Barnes. If that ever happened.
“He's so handsome,” Roxy crooned. “Don't you think so?”
Megan pretended ignorance. “Who?”
“Aaron, of course. Who'd you think I meant?”
“Well, you did start out the day by admiring Mr. Harris. Remember?”
“That old guy? Eesh. What a pill.”
Laughing, Megan shook her head. “Old? You're the second person who's called him that today. I hardly think he's all that ancient, honey.”
“For you, maybe.” Roxy made a face. “I'd rather kiss a frog.”
“Who said anything about
kissing?
”
“Hey! You're blushing,” Roxy said. “Don't tell me you're finally interested in romance! Oh, wow. I thought I'd never see this.”
Megan gripped the steering wheel tighter and composed herself before answering. “Mr. Harris and I are professional associates, that's all. I admire the work he's doing. It takes a special person to face troubled kids every day and not give up.” She paused, then added, “I was probably blushing because I was picturing you kissing Aaron. If that idea has even crossed your mind, I want you to promise me right now you won't get involved with him. He's much too old for you.”
Roxy giggled and slid down in the seat so she could prop her bare feet on the dash.
“Roxanne? Promise me.”
“Too late,” the teenager said with pride. “He's already kissed me.” Another giggle. “And it was wonderful!”
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Roxy had dozed off on Megan's couch as soon as her head hit the pillow. Sleep didn't come nearly as quickly and effortlessly to Megan.
Thinking too much was the biggest part of her problem, she reasoned, yet how could a person whose mind was whirling like an Arkansas tornado turn off those thoughts enough to relax? Consciously trying to do so was obviously the wrong approach. So was employing logicâassuming she possessed any anymore.
She stared at the ceiling of her bedroom, wondering how she was going to continue to help her sister, and do her job, without destroying the peace of the camp.
Would prayer help? Undoubtedly. Of course, that was taking for granted that she had the mental ability to concentrate on her heavenly Father while most of her brain felt like it was getting one of Bobby Joe's swirlies!
Picturing such a silly scenario brought a chuckle. She rubbed her eyes. Clearly, this project at Camp Refuge had cast her as a student, as well as a teacher. She could show the children how to properly care for animals and encourage love and trust between them, but the real results were going to be up to Godâon all fronts.
Megan could understand how easy it would be to adopt James's habit of seeing himself in charge of whatever happened, good or bad. However, there was much more going on here than that. It looked as if she was about to enter another advanced course in what she'd come to think of as “God School.”
Self-doubt immediately began to flutter at the fringes of her mind like tiny moths circling a lightbulb on a summer's eve. How could she hope to show anyone else the path to peace and hap
piness when she, herself, lacked absolute trust? She was human. She had misgivings, fears. Everybody did. The question was, why was she still fretting about those concerns when she should have given them over to the Lord's keeping and gone to sleep long ago?
Megan took her frustrations out on her feather pillow by pounding it into a more comfortable shape.
Something told her she'd just been given her first exam in the new class God had enrolled her in. And she'd flunked, big-time.
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James awoke to daylight from a fitful sleep, wondering how any time could have passed. If he hadn't had his boys to worry about, he'd have pulled the covers over his head and dozed for at least another hour. Unfortunately, he could hear that they were already up so he had no choice but to join them.
He got to the door of the communal bathroom in time to see Zac put a headlock on his brother and start for one of the stalls.
James's loud “Good morning” put a quick end to the prank.
“Hey, Mr. Harris,” the oldest boy called, giving Bobby Joe a parting pat on the head, “long time no see. I thought you were gonna sleep all day.”
Yawning, James raked his fingers through his hair to comb it back. “Don't tempt me.”
Zac was grinning and leering at the same time. “You sure stayed up late enough last night. So, when's that sweet thing comin' back to see us?”
The arch of James's eyebrow was no accident. He stared at Zac without speaking until the boy flinched, then looking around, James said, “I expect you all to treat Ms. White with the same respect and consideration you give me and everybody else who works here. The same goes for her animals. Understand?”
As soon as the boys nodded, he continued. “When she gets here and sets up her program, I'll make up a daily schedule. Anybody who wants to learn about the animals will have a turn. Butâ¦if any of you cause trouble, that will end your chances to spend time in her campsite. Is that clear?”
Mumbled answers of “Yes, sir” echoed in the cavernous, tiled bathroom.
“Good,” James said. “I'm glad to hear it. Now, if you guys are finished with your showers, I'd like to take one.”
All the children scattered except Zac, who lounged with his thin back against a porcelain sink, crossed his arms and grinned from ear to ear.
James eyed him cautiously. “Yes?”
“I was just thinkin',” Zac drawled. “If you want me to keep those kids busy so you can romance Miss Megan without bein' disturbed, it's gonna cost you.”
“Oh, it is, huh?” His mouth twitched with a suppressed smile. “And what makes you think I have any such notion?”
The boy huffed. “Man, if you don't, you're dumber than I thought you were.”
It was all James could do to keep from bursting out laughing. Instead, he grabbed a towel by one corner, flicked it in the boy's direction with a snap that purposely fell short of making a connection and roared “Out! Out!”
Zac broke and ran, leaving James shaking his head and chuckling. What a kid. A real character. Smart, all right, but as unpredictable as Ozark weather.
Thinking about the boys in his care, James turned on the shower the same way he always did, stripped and stepped under the spray. The first few moments were fairly comfortable. Then the water turned icy!
Roaring, James dodged and groped for the hot water faucet. It was already on full force. Could those kids have used up all the hot water? Noth
ing like that had ever happened before. Shivering, he gave the taps a quick twist to end his torture and stared at the plumbing.
Now that the water had ceased to flow he could hear the buzz and titter of young voices outside the bathroom door. He listened closely. It sounded like they were laughing. And Zac was loudest of all. Had they set him up? Rigged the shower? Probably, but how?
His teeth chattering, James grabbed a clean towel and dried himself vigorously to bring back some warmth. Zac again. It figured. If that kid ever got himself squared away in society he'd probably do well in whatever career he chose. The trick was going to be in convincing him to choose lawful endeavors. Concepts of right and wrong were hard to explain to kids who had never been taught there was any difference.