Everything I Need (12 page)

Happy now that the anxiousness has subsided, I close my eyes and tilt my head up toward the sky. Feeling the heat and sun beating down on my face, I don’t want to go back in there. At least the weed helped. I’m more focused and finally able to do my shit without Tristan always running through my damn mind.

I’m trying to run my tongue over my lips because my mouth is so fucking dry, and it gets stuck at the corner of my mouth.
Shit!
I’m so high! At the thought of it, I begin laughing. Dave looks up from his phone and grins back at me. He cautiously stands, doing a quick rubdown of his face as he turns to leave.

“Glad to be of service,” he jokes, patting me on my shoulder, then walks away.

By the time I get back in there, Tristan is leaning over the deck, listening. You can hear his voice playing back, echoing around the room as I take a seat on the couch. I hope I have a little more time before going at it again, like five minutes. I need to get some moisture back to my mouth first.
I feel fucking great
, I think, trying to hide my grin. Should’ve done this yesterday.

When Tristan notices me back in the room, he stares over at me. Everything he showed before is completely gone and back to his normal self.
Huh?
I give him a baffled look.
Why is he pissed off all of a sudden?
Probably because I left and his little hold on me was broken. That shouldn’t piss him off; he knows damn well why I left. It was too intense for me, but thanks to the weed, I’m good to go now. Blankly looking back at him, I take a drink of my water.

************

The rest of the day goes by in a blur, from being a little stoned, to constantly going over material, and laughing at the guys messing with each other. Tristan, thankfully, keeps his mouth shut and focuses on the material. I do notice that he doesn’t look back over my way for rest of the day and whenever I speak, he either steps out of the room real quick or starts busying himself with the controls. I can’t believe I’m even thinking like this. Normally, I would be grateful not to have his attention on me, but now I hate that I don’t have it. Yes, I know. I’m fucked up.

By the time Gage calls for a wrap, the guys and me are in full celebration mode. I’m pretty much done already, with a couple little do-overs I can get done within the next day or two.

Sitting at the table by the pool with Caleb and Tristan, the sun is starting to set and everything is once again painted in orange and pink hues. Too buzzed to care if Tristan is staring at me, or whatever, I watch Dave and Gunner try to throw each other over the edge of the pool. With them both being fit, it’s a struggle for each of them, and we’re all just laughing at their fucking goofiness.

Unexpectedly, I notice Ryan from the corner of my eye doing this weird ninja move, rolling in kind of a half-assed drunken somersault toward the struggling guys. Coming to a stop lying on his back, he lifts his right leg in the air and swiftly kicks at them, causing both of them to lose balance and crash into the pool.
Holy shit!
Ryan’s little move has us at the table laughing so hard that I wish I would’ve recorded it. He flips back over looking like the move almost broke his neck. He loses his footing a little when he stands, clearly drunk off his ass.

My gut literally hurts from laughing. It feels so fucking good to just let go like this. All of a sudden, I feel my phone vibrate in my back pocket. I’m having difficulty trying to pull it out. I lean to one side.

“Holy shit, girl! Better slow down on them Coors,” says Caleb beside me. “Need any help?”

“Nope,” I lazily smile back at him and answer without really looking at who’s calling me.

“Hel-lo!” This permanent grin is actually hurting my cheekbones a bit now.

“Sophia, are you all right?”

Shit!
It’s Benny! I try to sound sober, and by the way, trying to act or sound sober when you’re not is so much harder to do and you actually end up sounding more ridiculous than before.

Sucking in my cheeks, I put up a little front.

“Ah . . . yeah, babe. I’m all right. Just having a couple beers before I head to bed. We covered a lot today, so the guys and I are just unwinding a little.”

There, I feel better now letting Benny know the truth, but I do know that he doesn’t like me boozing either. That’s why I don’t usually drink around him.

“Oh, okay. Well, not too much.” He tries to laugh on the line but I can tell he’s serious.

“I won’t, babe. I’m a good girl.”

Caleb starts busting up laughing beside me and I lean over to punch him in his shoulder, smiling at him when I do.

“Well, I won’t keep you on for long since you had a tough day and all. I just wanted to hear your voice.”

Aw my. Benny’s so sweet.

“Okay, babe,” I whisper back to him seductively. “I love hearing your voice, too. Bye.”

“Bye, sweetheart.”

Grinning to myself, I end the call, but when I look up Tristan’s eyes are cold and dangerous, zoning directly in on me. He’s breathing heavily. Out of nowhere, he slams his hands down on the table, shaking the damn thing. Everyone stops. Ryan must sense shit’s about to hit the fan, because he uses the remote for the sound system to turn on some music. Ironically, Three Days’ Grace’s “I Hate Everything About You” is the song that starts to play.

“Was that your fucking
boyfriend?
”

Tristan’s voice comes out eerily calm opposed to the behavior he just displayed. Giving him this “duh” look, I try to start up conversation with Caleb again but Tristan’s not having it.

“Do you fucking love him?”

Whoa!
Where the fuck is this coming from?
Caleb pauses and stares back at Tristan, too. Getting pissed now, I roll my eyes at him.

“That’s none of your damn business,” I reply calmly.

Tristan’s mouth ticks at the side before he abruptly stands and grabs his bottle off the table. He whips it down to the ground, causing pieces of glass to shatter in all directions. He’s fucking lost it!

The rest of the guys, even Caleb, start getting up and getting the hell out of here.
What the fuck?
They’re just going to leave me with this psycho of a man! Fucking anger boils beneath my skin. How could he say something like that? He doesn’t have the right and now he just ruined another fucking night!

Remaining still in my seat as the guys walk into the house, I furrow my brows together, glaring up at Tristan who is, glowering at me on the opposite side of the table. Slowly getting to my feet, I say nothing, but shake my head disappointedly at him. I’m done with his temper tantrums. I’m going to bed.

As I turn to go back inside, Tristan lunges at me from the other side of the table and catches my elbow roughly with his large hand. No, he fucking didn’t! Trying to pull my arm free, I glare up at him.

“Get the fuck off of me!”

“No,” he says through clenched teeth.

Motherfucker!
Every time I try to pull away, he yanks me that much harder into his firm chest. I hate it and I love it.
Shit.

Chapter Eleven

Sophia

We’re both breathing heavier now and there’s something about the way Tristan is glaring down at me that sends chills through me and instantly sends liquid heat to my core. His eyes are dark and dangerous; the tendons in his neck flex with every deep breath he takes. Fucking furious at the position he is putting me in, I yank with all of my might for him to release my arm. It doesn’t fucking work. Bending my neck back as far as I can to get a good look up at him, I plead with him in a low voice.

“Please let go of me, and leave me the fuck alone.”

I run my tongue over my bottom lip. That catches his eye and a small smirk flits across his lips but his eyes are still dangerous.

“Not a fucking chance, Sophia,” he growls at me.

I can’t do this, not again. Cranking my free arm back as far as it can go, I swing it full force and slap him hard across his face. My damn hand instantly starts to sting from the connection with Tristan’s strong jaw. He only flinches for a moment then he pushes my elbow out and away from him as he releases me.

With the death glare he is fucking giving me I know I need to get the fuck out now! Stumbling back a couple steps from Tristan’s force, I quickly turn around and go into the house, pissed that he can’t keep himself in check and ruining another fucking good night. I stomp my way up the stairs.

“I’m not done with you yet!” he yells at me as follows me inside. I’m already halfway up the stairs. Excuse me?
Really?

Peering over the banister at Tristan, whose eyes are narrowed on mine as he stalks his way to the stairs, I give out an exasperated laugh.

“Fuck off!”

I let out a sinister chuckle so I don’t let my temper boil completely over. I mean, I already hit the guy, for Christ’s sake. It must have pissed him off even more than I thought, because he grabs a hold of the railing and starts taking four fucking steps up at a time. Fucking skyscraper can do that.

My belly drops and my eyes widen. Oh, shit! Reaching the top landing, I start sprinting toward my room. Right when I reach out for the handle, Tristan’s chest crashes into my back, practically pushing me through the damn door.

I gasp for breath, as he roughly grabs hold of my shoulders and abruptly spins me around. When I open my mouth to scream, he dips down and forcefully kisses me deep, his tongue trying to pry its way into my mouth.

Buzzed up and out of breath, I mistakenly let him in. His skillful tongue and soft lips feel even better than I remembered. His hard chest firmly pushes up against mine as he deepens the kiss, groaning into my mouth. We’re both taking out all of our pent-up anger over the years in this one fucking kiss.

I’m starting to get lost in him; I can’t get enough. My hands reach up and start roughly pulling through his thick hair. He lets go of my shoulders and brings both of his hands to my ass and squeezes hard. Then it fucking hits me like damn lightning. Benny!

My eyes pop open and I let go of Tristan’s scalp and bring my hands to his firm pecs, trying to shove him off of me, pulling my lips away as I do. My lips are swollen and tender from his assault on my mouth and his dark eyes are clouded. His mouth is parted, breathing deeply. He shakes his head
no
at me, trying to lean in for another kiss, but I press my back harder into the door. Somehow I must think I can escape from him, but he has me trapped. I cannot get away.

“What?” he breathlessly asks me. But he already knows my unspoken answer and lets go of my ass, giving me some space to calm back down. His mouth instantly goes into a tight line and his fists clench at his sides.

It’s so intimidating staring up at him when he looks like this, but also so fucking hot that I hate myself for reacting this way. I press my thighs tighter as I stare back up at him, and he notices because his fists unclench. Tristan’s eyes zone in on my action then travel slowly back up to my face.
Shit!

His damn cocky grin starts tugging up on the one side of his lips.

“Don’t fucking tell me you’re thinking about that pussy boy of yours, Sophia,” he says arrogantly.

What?
How could he? Tristan’s words ignite the fire inside of me again and I lash out at him. I can’t believe he just fucking said that! Taking a step into his space, I raise both my hands before slamming them down on his chest. With my eyebrows pulled together so tight and my lips tucked into my mouth, I begin to flip the fuck out.

“Don’t you ever fucking call him that! EVER!” I scream and I don’t really care if I’m making a scene. I know I’m pissed at what he called Benny, but deep down, I feel like I’m finally letting him have it for what the motherfucker put me through. But my small hands do nothing to him. He actually starts laughing down at me and this pisses me off more.

“Shut the fuck up, Tristan!” I push off of him to take a step back again. He is grinning down at me with his dark eyes dancing.
Son of a bitch!
Well, that’s real fucking nice; how can he laugh in my face as I fall apart. My eyes almost burning now with angry tears, I point up at him and pop my hip to the side, resting my free hand on it. “Benny is way more of a man than you will ever be.” I slowly lower my hand and rest that, too, on my other hip. Tristan is not laughing anymore but still has his bitch grin on, so I begin to cut deeper.

“He never treats me like shit and throws me away.”

“I didn’t mean to treat you like shit, Sophia.” Tristan’s deep voice rumbles as his grin starts melting away.

“Bullshit! You used me then and you’re trying to fucking use me now. I hate you, Tristan!”

Okay, that is definitely a lie, but I have to hurt him. I want to hurt him. He flinches for only a moment at my words. Tristan tries to reach out for me but I slap his hands away.

“Don’t touch me! I never want you to touch me again!” Letting go of my hips, I feel behind me for the doorknob. Tristan’s jaw is working beneath his flesh, grinding his teeth together.

“You’re a fucking liar, Sophia.”

I raise my eyebrow at him. What does that mean?
I’m the liar?
Turning the doorknob in my hand slowly, I roll my eyes at him. My escape is right behind me. I only need to step back once then I’m home free, so I might as well give him the final blow.

Running my tongue over my lips, I can still taste him on them.

“I never lied to you, Tristan. Never.”

Tristan takes one stride toward me and pushes me back into my room before slamming the door shut behind him.
What the fuck?
The room is dark with only a sliver of light coming through the French doors. Tristan reaches his arms back behind his shoulders and yanks, practically ripping his shirt off. Holy shit! Tossing it to the side, he begins to crack his knuckles.

“What the hell are you doing, Tristan?” I whisper to him because fear and arousal have taken over my voice. Holy shit, I’m sick in the head for getting turned on right now. Crossing his arms, he points his chin at me.

“You never want me to touch you again, hey?”

Shaking my head
no
at him, he saunters over to me. I stand still as he approaches me. He leans in and whispers into my ear, grazing his teeth against my earlobe when he does.

“You’re so fucking wet right now, my girl, that I can smell the heat coming off of you.”

Oh my God. I feel even more drunk now because of his crude words, my body buzzing at Tristan’s proximity. He fucking knows, too, because when he steps back, he licks his lips as he looks down at me.

“You don’t want me touching you? That, Sophia, makes you a liar. You want me touching you. Hell, Sophia, you want me doing a lot fucking more than that.”

How he can call me out just like that? I want to slap him all over again, but I have to remain strong.
Stay strong, Sophia.
I bend my neck back to look up at him.

“I don’t want you,” I say, shaking my head and clearing my voice so I don’t sound all lusty. That’s it. That’s all I can manage for now. I take a small step back, but Tristan’s on me again when I do. With one hand, Tristan fists my hair, pulling me up on him. His other hand rips the top button off of my jean shorts.
Fuck!
He roughly slides his hand inside. I try to struggle out of his grasp so he can’t feel that he was right, but his tight hold on my hair keeps me in place.

Once his rough fingers slide down and reach the moisture that has pooled in my panties pretty much since the kiss, he lazily smiles down at me while softly stroking circles around my clit. My eyelids become heavy; my body is in need.
Shit.

I try to grab a hold of his wrist, but he only tortures me more. My skin starts to tingle and the ache I was feeling before now throbs slowly. My breathing picks up and instead of stopping him, I realize that I’m actually trying to move him deeper into me for relief. I can feel his warm, heavy breaths showering down on my face. He’s staring at me with dark, hungry eyes but his cocky smirk has been wiped right off his face. He slowly slides two fingers into me and a small moan escapes my throat, causing Tristan to groan.

“Damn, baby, you’re so fucking wet. I knew you were fucking lying to me.”

Tristan dips his head down and presses his lips to mine. I can’t fight this anymore. I don’t want to. So, I let him in. I part my mouth just enough for him to slide in with his tongue. I begin to start teasing it with mine, gently pushing and stroking it against his. His hand begins to thrust deeper and faster into me the more I respond.

Lifting my hands up the length of him. Feeling his hard chest like this beneath my palms again is so damn good. I know I shouldn’t keep on going. The little voice in the back of my head is screaming at me to stop. I need to stop. I close my mouth and rest my forehead against his chest; Tristan is still inside me with his fingers. I let out a defeated breath.

“I can’t do this,” I whisper.

He stills for a moment then pulls them out of me. Right when I think he is actually going to listen to me, Tristan suddenly takes both of my wrists in one of his and yanks them above my head. He takes tight hold of my waist with his other hand, squeezing my flesh as he does.

Without his hand there to hold them up, my shorts slowly slide down my thighs, stopping right above my knees. I know should feel embarrassed for being so exposed like this, but I don’t.

“I’m not going to lose you again. Especially to some punk that doesn’t have a fucking clue what to do with a woman like you.”

His words about Benny bring me back to reality and I know I have to fight these urges with everything I have. Anger begins to form in me again and I attempt to jerk out of his hold by moving my hips to the opposite side while trying to yank my arms down.

“Fuck you!” I yell at him.

Tristan just cackles at me before he steps me back to the bed.

“You will.”

He lets me go, and the backs of my knees end up running into the bed, causing me to lose my balance and fall back onto it. Tristan drops to his knees in front of me, his calloused hands pressing down on my skin, opening my thighs up to him. I don’t even realize that I’m panting, but I fucking forget how forceful he is. I’ve never had sex like this with any man before or after Tristan.

Fuck it. I absolutely love it. Not caring about anything anymore, I’m about to make my bed and lie in it. But this right here . . . sex with Tristan again. I don’t give a shit right now about the consequences.

I prop myself up on my elbows so I can watch him. He places his nose right on my entrance and inhales deeply with his eyes set on mine.
Fuck!
Tristan takes two fingers and spreads my folds easily and begins to work his tongue on me, licking up the juices that he caused, moaning into my pussy when he does.

“Ah . . .” I let out softly when he pulls my swollen clit into his mouth and grazes his teeth gently against it. He takes his other hand and slides two fingers in, working them slowly at first, circling my inner walls and stretching me, preparing my body to take him again.
Fuck.

Falling back onto the bed now, I bring my hands up to cup my breasts, squeezing my nipples through the confinements of my shirt and bra. I want my damn shirt off.

Tristan must be watching me caress myself because he groans into my pussy again, sending vibrations through me.

“That’s it, my girl. Squeeze them fucking tits.”

His words send shivers down my spine. Caressing myself harder now, actually causing my breasts some pain, I begin to move my hips more, rubbing myself up on Tristan’s stubbled face as he laps up every ounce of my arousal. I’m getting close. Holy shit, I’m getting close. And once I feel Tristan’s strong arm move up my body and place his hand over mine on my breast as he continues sucking on my clit, I come. Not just come, but
fucking
come, hard.

“Fuck, Sophia,” he groans into me again as my body rides out the wave of my orgasm.

Coming off my high, I barely register the sound of Tristan unzipping his jeans. He grabs my ankles and lifts my legs up, spreading them wider apart. Opening my eyes, I see Tristan’s jaw is clenched. He rams into me with on strong thrust, stilling a moment for me to adjust to him again.