Everything You Need (20 page)

She pushed her body into his touch, her hips moving in the rhythm of his fingers, and turned her head toward him. Grabbing a fistful of his hair, she tugged him up, offering him her mouth.

Their lips touched and their tongues slid against each other. He was drowning in the need for her; not just her body, but for her heart and soul. He wanted to possess her and to be possessed in return. He wanted to share laughter and tears with her, his days and his nights, he wanted everything. “Be mine?”

She pulled on his hair almost painfully before she froze and clenched around his fingers.

He ended the kiss and, enchanted, stared at her as she jerked against him, her eyes closed and her lips lightly ajar. “So gorgeous,” he whispered. He thought about lowering her onto the coffee table and taking her from behind -- with his hands on her hips he would ram into her until she cried in pleasure -- but then he wouldn’t be able to see her face and he needed to see it, he needed to memorize the expressions she made.

She looked at him from under her lashes, a soft smile gracing her face.

“Yes, so gorgeous.” He got rid of her leggings and panties, put on a condom, and then, cradling her with his arm, he turned her so she straddled him. He leaned his forehead against hers. His fingers dug into the softness of her backside as he lifted her and centred her against him as she guided him inside. Her damp warmth enveloped him. He tensed his jaw, fighting against the agonizing bliss that threatened to pull him into its depths. “To feel you like this...” His arms embraced her and held her tightly against him. “I missed this so much.”

Her arms went around his neck. “Don’t talk.” She pressed her lips against his, entangling him in a kiss, while she pushed herself up and then down onto her knees before she started to ride him, slowly and gently.

Holding her, he rocked his pelvis, thrusting up, into her, meeting every one of her descents. His fingers cupped the back of her neck and he tilted her head, deepening the kiss as he devoured her, immersing himself in her taste, while he drove into her.
I love you, I want you, I need you
.

She moaned into his mouth.

Good, so good.
He impaled her on his rod, faster, harder; perspiration wet the curve of his spine and the scent of sex drifted around them like a fog. Nothing mattered but her, and the silver ecstasy that was coming closer and closer with each one of her downward strokes. He was about to soar high and he wanted her with him. His hand sneaked between them and he touched her and rubbed her between his fingers. “Be mine.”

She trembled above him and her nails cut into the skin of his shoulders.

He continued to drive into her, drinking in the moans that spilled from her mouth until the whiteness overtook his vision and his toes curled. He tightened the grip he had on her, drowning in the pleasure and the feel of her.

Their erratic breathing calmed down, but he refused to release her.

She leaned her cheek on his shoulder, while she combed through his long hair, which had escaped from its tie.

He turned them sideways, then lowered them down onto the couch, so that they lay on their sides, facing each other.

She shifted so that he slid out of her and pushed her tunic down.

He got rid of the condom and tucked himself into his pants.

She snuggled closer, her head against his shoulder and her hands laced under her chin.

He yawned, his hand stroked her back. “I’m so happy that you are here, with me.”

She bit her lip.

“We need to talk about --”

“Can we do that later?”

“Okay.” He yawned again and his eyelids fluttered closed; he forced them open, but they dropped down again. He needed to stay awake, to enjoy this time with her, but it was like with her in his arms all the tension of the last two days was erased, leaving him relaxed and sleepy, so sleepy. He would just allow himself fifteen minutes, just fifteen minutes, that was all.

She shifted, the softness of her lips touched his cheek as her fingers, like the brush of butterfly wings, caressed the bruise on his side. “You really should be more careful.”

He hummed assent.

Her lips slid over his cheek to his ear and she softly whispered something, something that he couldn’t quite distinguish. He would have asked what she said, but he was already slipping away into the soothing darkness of sleep.

#

The ring of the phone pierced the air and Ashton’s skull. His eyes flew open and he blinked in the light coming from the lamp on the ceiling, while his fingers crawled over the table until they hit the plastic rectangle. He grabbed it and dragged it to his ear. “Yes?”

“Did you get the photos?” Mary’s voice travelled over the line.

He groaned and lifted himself up. “What?”

“I sent you photos, did you get them? Why didn’t you call me back? I asked you to call me back.”

“Hey, you were the one who hasn’t been answering my calls and now I’m supposed to jump because you texted me?” What planet did she live on? He yawned and rubbed his face, looking around, frowning at Kris’s absence. “What do you want?”

“Did you see the picture?” Mary’s voice was heavily laced with impatience.

“Yes, I have seen the picture you sent me. So?”

“Don’t you care that she’s meeting with an older man?”

“Older man? What are you on about?” He stood up. “Listen, Mary --”

“No, you listen to me,” Mary screeched. “She has an older man who gives her money. I have pictures to prove it. I sent them to you. Just look at them. You have to look at them.”

“Mary, really...” He shook his head. “I don’t care. I don’t care for any of it. She could be a hooker and I wouldn’t care.” Actually, he would care enough to try to become her only client, or at least give her money so that she wouldn’t have to sell herself, because the truth was, he would take Kris any way he could get her. “I love her.”

“You can’t love her! How can you love her? You should love me!”

“Mary, calm down.” Were they at this again?

“No. You should be mine. I saw you first, even before Kate, but she took you away and now...” Her voice broke.

“You have to leave Kris alone. Promise me. No more following her around and taking pictures.”

“I won’t promise you anything.”

“Where are you? I’ll come over and we can talk this out.” Where was his shirt?

“There’s nothing to talk about!”

“Where are you? At home?” He found his shirt tossed over the table. He picked it up and pulled it on.

“We have nothing to talk about. If I can’t have you...” Mary’s voice trailed off.

“We’re friends, only friends, you agreed.”

“No, you said that, I never agreed, never. I love you.”

He sighed. “Mary, really?”

“Yes, really,” she spat out and cut the line.

Staring at the phone, he shook his head. He would really have to have a good long talk with her, preferably with Kalen by his side. What had happened to her? Where was the sweet girl he had known since elementary school? Where did she disappear to? And where had Kris gone? “Kris!” He went in search of the blonde. “Kris!” He knocked on the bathroom door. “Are you in there?” There was no answer. He opened the door and stepped inside.

It was empty.

He went to the kitchen. It was also empty, so was the storage room. He went to the door of the studio. It was unlocked and he had locked it, he always locked it when he was with her. She had left? But why would she leave? He strolled to the table, noticing a white envelope. He picked it up. There were five hundred-notes inside it and a note.
Thank you for everything, Kris
, it said. He frowned. Why was she thanking him? And why the money? He took his phone and dialled Kris’s number.

“The number you have dialled is currently unavailable,” a monotone woman voice said.

He scowled, and a chill crawled into the pit of his stomach. The money, the note, and her number being disconnected. She had been so attentive to him today, so affectionate, like somebody who was about to -- “No.” He shook his head. “No, this can’t be a goodbye, it can’t.”

Chapter 21

Guess who is coming home this weekend?
Kris, standing by her locker in The Delight’s wardrobe, stared at the text displayed on her phone. She tiredly sighed before she turned it off.

The door of the locker room opened and Camden walked through it. “Hey.”

Kris forced her mouth into a smile. “Camden, hey. I thought you’d already gone home.”

“I was waiting for you.”

“Oh.” She put the phone into the pocket of her black apron, closed the locker, and faced him. “Did something happen?”

“That’s what I was about to ask you. Callie mentioned that you have been down lately.”

“It’s nothing.”

“Are you sure?” His eyes scrutinised her. “Did you have a fight with Ash?”

“Why? Is he okay?”

“Why wouldn’t he be?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Camden frowned. “When was the last time you saw him?”

“Last week.”

“Is he the reason you changed your phone number?”

“No, I lost my phone, I told you.” And now, because of her lie, she was using George’s old phone, a relic that had no camera, no internet connection, nothing other than an mp3 player.

“And the reason you look so listless?”

“I look listless?” But... she had put so much effort into smiling, into being energetic and talkative. Could Camden see right through her? Could he see how she didn’t allow herself to think about the blue-eyed man, even when the longing for him was tearing her apart? Could her friends see that she wasn’t allowing herself to remember all the moments she had spent with Ashton, even though they were there, always there, intruding into her mind. She had known him for a few months and he had forced his way into her life, her mind and her heart. No matter how hard she tried to shove him out, he was there -- always there -- lingering at the edge of her mind, despite the troubles that plagued her life. The troubles about which she could talk with Camden, since he sort of knew about the situation with her mother.

“What’s troubling you?”

“Mum is coming home this weekend. And George is leaving at the end of this month and...” She sighed and rubbed her temples, then tugged on a strand of her hair. “I need a new tenant. I’ve already advertised and I’ve even had two interviews, but I don’t think that either of them are going to work out.”

“Why do you think so?”

“I got lucky with George. He’s considerate, he’s not fussy, he cleans up after himself and --” the main thing “-- he wasn’t bothered by my mother’s ‘antics.’” The other tenant, the one she had rented out her room to while she crashed in mother’s room, just after her grandfather’s death when she had still hoped that she would be able to continue her studies, had run away after just two weeks. She could understand it, it could be quite stressful living with a drunk who could doze off on the toilet, and who had a habit of hogging the bathroom for hours, leaving lit cigarettes everywhere and having loud tantrums. “I’ll probably have to find a second job. I don’t know how I’m going to pay the bills otherwise.” Since she had given all the money she had to Ashton.

“Kalen is thinking of opening a law firm, you could be his secretary.”

“Why would he employ me?”

“You know how to use Word and Excel, right?”

“Yes.”

“And you’re a hard worker, too. Those are always in demand.”

“Would he really hire me? As a temp?”

“Maybe as a regular. I’ll ask him.”

“That would be great.” That would lessen the strain, but Kalen and Ashton were friends, there was a danger of seeing Ashton again...
To see him again...

The door of the locker room flew open and Rose burst into the room. “Kris, what are you doing? Come on.”

“Just a minute.”

“We just got a group of schoolchildren. Andy and I can’t make it on our own. Don’t dilly-dally.”

“I’m coming.”

“Well, hurry up,” Rose snapped and then she was gone, slamming the door behind her.

“I’d better go.” Kris took a step toward the door.

“Kris,” Camden said.

“Yes?”

“If you ever need help, or just somebody to talk to, you know you can always turn to me, right?”

“Yes.” She nodded. Then she walked through the door into a hallway that led into a crowded coffee shop, full of chatter and jostling as eleven and twelve year old children pushed the tables together and argued over chairs. There were at least thirty of them. They were lucky that it was a quiet time of day and that there weren’t any other patrons except for the two retirees at the corner table. Andy, a brunette girl two years her senior, took charge of them, while Rose recommended cakes to the children standing by the display case. They were leaving fingerprints all over the glass. The adults supervising the children wore an almost suffering expression on their faces the whole time the group was in the coffee shop, and they left a large tip as an apology for the mess. After the door swung shut behind the group, Rose and Kris took care of the dirty glasses and plates, and soiled napkins that littered the tables, while Andy started to push the tables apart, setting them into their previous positions.

Kris was soaking the plates and Rose stacking the glasses into the washing machine, when Andy passed them to stop by the coffee station.

“Rose,” the brunette turned to the red-haired girl. “There’s a gorgeous man at table four requesting that you serve him.”

“We’d better not tell Kalen that.” Kris half-turned and craned her neck to glance over the counter at the table four. Her eyes landed on a black-haired man and her breath caught. She averted her gaze and hunched her shoulders trying to be as small as possible, hoping that he hadn’t noticed her. Her hands shook and she shoved them into the suds. What was Ashton doing in The Delight? And what did he want with Rose?

“Kris?”

Kris grimaced and glanced in his direction to see him nearing with long strides. She wiped her hands into her apron.

He reached the counter. “What are you doing here? You work here?” His voice sounded surprised, and a small smile flashed on his face.

“You know him?” Rose asked.

There was a light bruise under Ashton’s left eye, Kris noticed. Was he fighting again?

The light in his eyes dimmed and the smile faded. “You left without saying goodbye and you cut me off. Why?”

“What’s going on here?” Rose’s eyes darted between Kris and Ashton.

“I left you a note.” Kris fixed her gaze on the spot between Ashton’s eyebrows and with her trembling fingers she played with the edge of the apron’s front pocket.

“All you left me was a thank-you note and the money.” A hint of storm darkened Ashton’s eyes, he set his hands on the counter.

“What money?” Rose asked.

Frowning, Kris glanced at Rose before her eyes went back to Ashton. “Could we not do this here, please?”

“When does your shift end? At eight?”

“You could take a break,” Rose said.

Kris scowled at red-haired girl.

“What?” Rose furrowed her eyebrows. “We’re not that busy right now.”

“Or we could continue our conversation here,” Ashton said.

“Fine.” Kris sighed. Evading Rose’s curious gaze, she went around the counter. She gestured for Ashton to follow her, then guided him across the room to the door that led into the hallway, past the locker room and the kitchen to the back door. Through it they stepped into a narrow alley. The cold air seeped through her shirt and she hugged herself, hiding her trembling hands under the dip of her elbows. “What did you want to talk about?”

“What do you think?” Ashton crossed his arms. “You left without word, without an explanation. You didn’t even tell me that that was your last visit.”

“You would have tried to stop me.”

“I would have tried to talk things through.” He swore and his hand flew to his neck. “Did you really think that you could just leave? To just shut the door in my face, and not expect me to try to open it? I’m in love with you, Kris.” He stepped closer to her. “I’m not giving up on us without a fight.”

Her knees felt weak and her body wanted to double over. She leaned on the brick wall for support and she spoke over the lump in her throat. “There’s no ‘us.’ There was never any ‘us.’”

“I just want a chance.” His hands took hold of her shoulders. “Just a chance.”

She averted her eyes. “I can’t give you one.”

His fingers dug into her skin. “Just a chance.” His voice was low and pleading. “Please.”

“No.” She couldn’t look at his face, knowing that if she did, she would yield. She had to stay strong, because she was too weak to allow him to enter her life and then lose him. She pushed his hands away. “No.”

“Why not?” He leaned his hands on the wall at her sides, trapping her.

“Because.” She shoved against his chest, but he was as unyielding as the wall behind her. “You don’t love me, you just think you do, because I look like her.”

“That’s not true,” he said softly. “I love you. I love your beauty and shyness and determination.
Your
beauty and shyness and determination, not Kate’s. I love the way you keep everything about you hidden and tucked away, but I hate that I’m not special enough for you to let me in. Let me in, please.” His breath stirred her hair at her temple. “Please, just let me in.”

“To end up hurt?”

“I would never hurt you. I want to take care of you.”

She had heard those words before. She sighed and with her fingers rubbed her temple. “Even if it’s true, that you don’t like me only because --”

“You mean love you.”

“That you don’t love me only because I look like Kate, my life is complicated and messed up and there’s no room in it for you.”

“I could help you simplify it and help you clear the mess.”

Camden had said that no woman could ever replace Kate, and she believed it. Right now, Ashton promised so much. His words sounded sincere and tempted her to give in to him -- oh, how she longed to give in -- but she believed Camden. Not only because Camden never lied, but because she had heard Ashton profess words of love to Mary too. Ashton must have started to equal ‘like’ with ‘love,’ that was why he could say ‘I love you’ so easily and so freely, to both Mary and her. “You don’t understand.”

“Then help me understand.”

Why was he so stubborn and persistent? She pushed her chin out. “Why should I?” she said with fake resolution and firmness in her voice. “When I don’t even like you.”

Silence descended over them for a short tense moment before he broke it with a soft snort. “Liar, you are such a liar.” His head lowered and his mouth touched her forehead then slid over her temple. “You do like me, very, very much.”

“No, I don’t.” She bit the inside of her cheek and steeled herself against the pleasure of his touch.

“Can you hear your breathing? Did you notice how shallow it becomes when I touch you?” he whispered against her skin. His fingers cupped her neck and his thumb caressed the side of it. “And your heartbeat, can you feel it how it speeds up?”

A crease cut between her eyebrows. She lifted her hands and set them against his chest, and felt the thuds of his strong heartbeat under her palm. She should have shoved him away, but his touch trapped her like a fly in a spider web.

His lips trailed down her cheek and his hand fondled her breast.

Heat bloomed in the pit of her stomach and spread all over her body.

“You want me.” His breath brushed against her skin and his hand glided down her side; he hooked his arm around her waist and drew her closer.

Her hands grabbed the lapels of his jacket.

His mouth trailed kisses down her neck while his fingers glided down the curve of her hip and thigh. He pushed her leg up and hooked it around his hip. “You want me badly, don’t you?”

“No.” She was weak, so weak where he was concerned. He had destroyed her defences not long ago, after she had started to pose for him, and now she had nothing to shield herself against his assaults.

His groin slid again her. “Admit it.”

A soft gasp escaped her and she bit into her lip, shaking her head in a no. Her eyelids fluttered closed.

“Admit it.” He rolled his hips and his hardness moved against her so deliciously.

“No,” she breathed out.

“You want me so badly that I could have you right here, right now.”

Her eyes snapped open. He could have -- he really could have -- because her body wanted to surrender to him, to give him everything he wanted, damn the consequences. Weakly, she pushed him away. “Stop it.”

“I can’t.” He straightened and his blue eyes burned into hers. “I need you. Can’t you feel how badly I need you?” His hips ground into her hard.

Her arms wanted to wrap around him and to pull him closer. He was right, she did want him. She didn’t have enough will power to refuse him, and he could have her anytime, anywhere; the way her body moved against him right now, despite their surroundings, was proof enough. When had she become so spineless, so needy? She had to get away from him.