Exposed (17 page)

Fuck, that meant he was doing something right.

He licked harder a few times, stroking Gabriel’s cock lightly in his other palm to provide a mix of stimulation. Then, he pushed the wetness inside with his fingers, sliding deep into Gabriel and rubbing that already-swollen nut-sized prostate just inside him.

“Yes,” Gabriel panted breathlessly, his hips shifting and writhing against the bed. “Yes, please, yes…”

Briar licked and sucked along the shaft of Gabriel’s swollen cock, admiring the sight up close, then sucked the side of the head before pulling back. “How desperate are you?” He had an idea to work out that energy.

Gabriel’s answering groan was a growl of pure, animal need.

“Ride me.” Briar rolled onto his back, licked his palm, and stroked himself to add more lubrication.

Gabriel reached up to the backpack near the head of the unmade bed, unzipped a pocket, and pulled out lube.

“Of course you have it nearby, in case I stopped by.”

Gabriel’s cheeks were burning bright red, and he slapped Briar’s shoulder just hard enough to almost bruise.

“Ow,” Briar complained, but he grinned nonetheless. It was true, then—part of him had hoped Briar would be around, if he wasn’t fucking other guys.

Maybe he felt that same itch under his skin every time they touched—the one that told him to be close in every possible way.

Gabriel squirted some into his palm and ran his hand down Briar’s shaft as he straddled him with wide, braced knees, then lowered his wet, tight hole onto and around his shaft.

Briar gasped at the feeling of impossible tightness around him, milking every inch of him from top to bottom. It was indescribable, and the way Gabriel watched him like he hated him, or loved to hate him, but not
hated
hated…

Like Briar got under his skin.

Briar’s heart raced. That was the feeling Gabe gave him.

But Gabriel wasn’t wasting time pulling his hips up and down, setting into a quick, heavy series of thrusts of his hips. He shoved himself down and pulled up again, over and over, sliding up and down that shaft while he leaned down and braced his arms over Briar.

Briar bit his neck and sucked, since it was right there and in desperate need of more teasing.

Gabriel grunted and growled, shifting his angle so he could fuck himself hard and fast, and Briar braced his feet on the bed while it shook with the force of each thrust.

“Yes,” Briar caught himself moaning, giving up kissing and rolling his head back as he clutched Gabriel close to him, running his nails up and down Gabriel’s back. “Fucking
yes
! Fuck me, baby.”

“Working… on it…” Gabriel was already tensing up in quick, almost imperceptible shivers of his muscles, one at a time, all out of order.

He was a twitching, squirming, desperate mess, and Briar couldn’t wait to fill him up with his juices and mark him as his
own
on some bizarre primal level. But his animal instinct was strong every damn time Gabe was around, let alone when he was deep inside him.

Just when Briar was starting to plateau close to the edge of ecstasy, Gabe’s thrusts slowed, his chest heaving for breath. “You do it.”

Briar pulled out and rolled them over in a quick, rough flip, then flipped Gabriel once again until he was face-down on the bed.

This would let him get deep, hard, and fast.

“
Yes
!” Gabriel moaned as Briar pushed inside again and grabbed both his shoulders, then started to fuck in and out in a quick, hard, ruthless rhythm.

Watching his cock disappear into Gabriel, watching every little ripple of pleasure through Gabriel’s thighs and back and shoulders and the way he kneaded the bed and thrust back, pushing as hard as he could to help Briar get in deep…

Shit, he’d never,
ever
seen something as hot.

He was going to come any second now, but Gabriel was going to beat him there. Gabriel was clenching around his length in quick, convulsive movements, and then Gabriel pressed his forehead hard into the bed and pushed up into his cock with a breathless garble of syllables and moans spilling from his lips.

Gabriel clenched
hard
, making it damn near impossible for Briar
not
to come that very second from the pure sensitivity of his swelling cock.

“Yes! Briar,
yes
, I love— Briar, yes…”

The words burned Briar’s ears, cutting straight through all the rest. Those two little words, not repeated any other time.

Just two, but the exact two that were plaguing him.

He pressed his forehead into Gabriel’s shoulder and wrapped his arm around Gabe’s waist, taking another few deep thrusts inside him.

Then he was hit with the same beautiful, blissful blackness burning through every inch of his body, the utter focus on his cock squirting inside Gabriel.

Inside
him, like he was his.

But he wasn’t.

Ow. The thought made his chest hurt. Or maybe it was the shortness of breath, the fact that he couldn’t breathe while his hips desperately thrust and ground inside Gabriel to get as deep and hard as he could with each little pulse and squirt from his cock.

“Hnnh! Oh,
fuck
, that’s hot,” Gabriel breathed, his voice broken and raw as he collapsed on his front on the bed, Briar still inside him.

Briar slowly pulled out, his lips parted as he tried to gasp for breath.

That… that was the fucking hottest thing he’d ever seen.

And it came on the heels of his greatest enemy of the many people with various hate-ons for him—his ex, no less—stealing the guy he wanted from under his nose.

Oh, shit, that hurt to think about.

He scooted slowly back and rubbed his face, then collapsed on his side next to Gabriel for a second, just to catch his breath. “I still think you’re doing a goddamn stupid thing.”

“I don’t have a choice. I’m fucked now, and you know it.”

Reputation-wise, maybe. Three weeks of drunken reveling wasn’t usually enough to destroy anyone’s career, but without a solid track record before those weeks to look back to? He was becoming a liability, and a risk to book, not a surefire bet.

Briar knew it was a mistake, but he opened his mouth anyway. “You shouldn’t have—”

“You made me this.” Gabe’s voice was low and intense, not rough and angry like he’d expected. Maybe he’d been fucked too good for that. “You
made
me this. You handed me the reins to this… huge
thing
, this career, this whole new life, and then you left me. You just pop in to see me and fuck me.”

Briar’s heart sank again, perhaps worse than the moment he’d realized what Austin was saying. He curled his fingers tightly around Gabriel’s hip and rubbed. “I didn’t realize.”

“I’ve had people to guide me. Julius, who has to look after, what, four, five of us? Make sure we’re
all
doing what’s best, not just me. He doesn’t have time to babysit. Vince, who handles the bigger shit. No, the only other people around are Paulo, Jon, Adam, and they’re
fucking up their lives
and they don’t even see it…”

Gabriel was upset now, his words choked out, and Briar was almost breathless listening to it. Tears stung the corners of his eyes. He kept his hand on Gabriel’s side, still and motionless now, just to be there.

“But they taught me what I could get away with, and I… I ran with it. You saw that I’d go that way, didn’t you?”

Yeah, it had occurred to Briar from the start. He just hadn’t thought through every consequence of it.

“But it suits you. Hans is starting to get my jobs now, isn’t he? Paulo’s taking back his turf. Everyone else is seeing a surge but me. I’m crashing. You can’t bullshit me and tell me it’s a fashion month hangover. I’ve
heard
what people say. It’s not hard.”

Briar let out a long, slow breath and closed his eyes. “I’m sorry.” He slowly pushed himself to sit up, gazing down at him. “And if you think Austin will be better for you…”

“
Not me
,” Gabriel emphasized, his voice sharp again. He pushed himself up, too, rolling onto his back and sitting up. “
All
of our livelihoods.”

What’s in your head?
Briar’s gaze flickered between Gabriel’s eyes. There was something there: Jordan? Austin bad-mouthing him? Fearing just being a hookup? Fearing being more?

There were so many damn layers to the man. The thing that had intrigued him from the first moment of that perfectly composed pout was turning out to be their downfall.

“I’ll support your decision no matter what. I just want to know one thing,” Briar whispered, letting out a slow breath.

“What’s that?”

“Where can I come see you?”

It took a long minute before the meaning of his question sank in; Briar saw the moment Gabriel’s eyes shifted from confusion and thought to fear, then defiance again. Those rich blue eyes were so expressive in these private moments, even if Gabriel’s talent was half the steely expression he was trying—and failing—to put on right now.

Finally, Gabriel settled on a muttered, “I’ll text you.” He averted his gaze, slowly flopping back down.

That sounded like a
get out
line if he’d heard one—and said one—a thousand times. Briar pulled on his underwear, jeans, shirt. His movements were quick and efficient despite his thoughts being anything but.

They didn’t say anything else as Briar pulled his shoes on, too, and moved for the door.

He had to break the news to Julius, and to their lawyer, see what the contract break clause they’d used was. But even if it was semi-legit, Briar already knew his answer: he wasn’t going to fight this decision.

If you love something, let it go.

He paused in the doorway, the door open as he looked back into the room at the naked Gabriel sprawled across the bed.

God, he could feel the hurt radiating from him, and Briar’s own chest ached.

“Bye,” Gabriel whispered.

This wasn’t
really
goodbye, unless he suddenly quit modeling and moved away from New York City. Briar knew he was going to run into him in a matter of weeks, if not days.

But it was a different kind of goodbye, and Briar was beginning to feel he wasn’t going to break through the kind of shell that made a man say
that
after they’d grazed the surface of the truth between them.

“Bye,” Briar answered, his voice low and gravelly. He let the door swing shut, then walked down the hall to the elevator and swiped a hand across his eyes.

If it comes back, it’s yours. If it doesn’t… it never was.

Gabriel was different, wasn’t he? He had to believe that.

So why was this ending the same fucking way, even after all he’d done to swear off dating, to never let this happen again?

M
ost Mondays started
the same way these days: with a call to Austin, his new manager. And most Mondays ended the same way: at the bottom of a vodka bottle.

He wasn’t an alcoholic by any means, but a fifth wasn’t that hard to get through by the end of another weekend without any parties to attend, or with only parties surrounded by people whispering about him behind his back. Or to his face.

Fuck, it was a whole month later, and he’d been bitterly, utterly right about the trajectory of his career.

But so had Briar. Austin hadn’t been able to pull him back from this one. The other guys he’d brought over were all getting work.

But not Gabriel.

That meant only one thing: he was shot.

And he was broke. A month wasn’t much time in which to go through his savings, but they were dwindling fast somehow. Between credit card bills from boutique spending sprees—and he’d be fucked before he’d let them get a penny of interest—and paying back his own expenses…

Shit, this was an awful, sinking realization.

He’d fucked around and wasted the best opportunity of his life.

It hadn’t taken long before Sandra had figured out what was going on, but there was no offer she could make that wasn’t just insulting. Help him get another admin job somewhere? Help her with her sewing business? Anything would be a step down from where he’d been.

And where he was, in some ways. That cologne commercial? It had still gone ahead, possibly as Gabe’s last big claim to fame.

So his face was plastered on bus stops and rolled across glitzy electronic signs now and then when he looked at them. He hated the sinking, wretched feeling in the pit of his stomach every time he saw himself in one of those damn things.

He’d had a couple jobs, sure, since joining Austin’s agency, which was simply called
Austin
. Worst name ever.

But nothing could regain the momentum he’d once had.

Austin still called that Friday evening, just to check in. He still didn’t love the guy or anything, but he could kind of see his point about certain things. Briar hadn’t denied destroying his career… and Briar had never told him he wanted more. Maybe Austin and Briar had used each other more than Briar admitted in public.

“Hey, man.”

“Hello,” he answered Austin. “So…”

“Nothing, man. Sorry. It’s getting pretty tough. But come on, come over to my house. We’ll talk about your next career move.”

Austin was working day and night as the manager for all the models, plus holding the position of CEO. Jordan was working as the face of the agency and wasn’t around much—they’d never even met face to face, and the office was a small but clean one on the other side of Central Park from Exposed, thank God.

Less risk of running into Briar.

That last fuck—the hottest one he’d ever had in his life, and the one he jerked off to just about every night?

God, he’d kill for that again, but that was just another regret to get drunk over if he let himself.

He wasn’t going to be the broke, angry model who resented the world. At least, he’d try to stave that off.

“Okay. I’ll be over in half an hour,” Gabriel told his boss and hung up, then sorted through his closet. He didn’t even feel like wearing any of the shit in there.

It all felt like it belonged to a guy who was a lot more successful than him, and less of a fuck-up. Not the kind of guy who would crash and burn so hard there were memes in modeling circles’ Facebook groups about him.

He leaned against the pole in the bus as he waited for the right stop, his eyes half-closed. It was supposed to be less painful soon, wasn’t it?

What kind of career moves did Austin have in mind? Ad campaigns? He could probably do that. That was the last stage in a guy’s career, but by this point…

It was getting obvious he was being shunted out, one way or another.

Surely to God it wasn’t all by that Leonard or Leopard or whatever guy, the classy druggie. No, this was a combination of factors.

But then, in dark hours, a part of him wondered if he should have done the line. At least he’d have a guaranteed gig next year, which would probably rekindle interest in him.

He suddenly understood Paulo better than ever.

Paulo had come to visit him a couple of times over the last month, but they’d only ever met somewhere else—away from the house. He still didn’t want anyone seeing his place.

He had to maintain the last vestiges of his image, tattered as it was.

“Thanks,” he muttered to the bus driver on his way out, striding down the street from the bus stop to Jordan and Austin’s place.

God, he hoped Jordan was out again. Austin seemed to be keeping them separated, just as he’d promised. That, at least, was a relief.

When he knocked on the door and Austin pulled it open, Gabriel jerked his head in a quick nod.

Austin held the door for him. “Come on in, darling. How have you been?” He cast a critical eye up and down Gabriel’s outfit, but Gabriel really didn’t give a fuck if his new manager told him off for not having the right accessories. He was lucky he was getting out of bed at all.

“Okay,” Gabriel grunted and shrugged. “Hoping you have good news soon.”

Austin sighed, then nodded. “Drink?”

“I’d love one.”

They settled in the reading room—of course they had a goddamn posh reading room. One of them was definitely from some kind of rich family.

Not the kind of family that gave him well-meaning lectures on how he was going to destroy his life by fucking men and preening for men, driving him to leave the very first day he could, that was for damn sure.

Gabriel tamped that down, too, and put on his impassive mask. Too much risk he’d have a meltdown otherwise, and he couldn’t do
that
in public.

Eventually, conversation turned to Briar.

“I have to say… I’m impressed with how well you’re holding up,” Austin admitted. “Um, I thought after Briar…”

“What about him?” Gabriel asked flatly.

Austin winced. “Well, it was… sort of a mutually unhealthy relationship. It’s a bit painful to leave a situation like that.”

Gabriel nodded slightly. “I imagine.”

“If you start feeling like you have to talk…”

Gabriel laughed under his breath. Christ, if only anyone had told him that and meant it just a month ago, this whole shit show could have been avoided. Then, he shook his head. “Nah.”

Austin slid closer to Gabriel on the couch, then reached out and put a hand on his knee. “You’ve seemed pretty out of sorts, even to someone who doesn’t know you well.”

Gabriel paused for a minute, swirling the whisky in the glass for a long minute and absently noting the rum and raisin notes in it.

The fucking life had ruined him for cheap booze, too.

What would he say: that he missed Austin’s ex, that he wanted to fuck his brains out but also learn what and who he was outside of work? That he’d totally blown his chance to have it all?

And then, Austin’s hand was running up the inside of his thigh toward his groin.

Gabriel froze, but he grabbed Austin’s hand just before it got to his cock and pushed it away.

Austin seemed as startled as him. “You don’t…?”

“No,” Gabriel breathed out. “No, I don’t.”

“Oh, shit. Okay.” Austin backed off, folding his arms again and shaking his head. “I totally misread that.” But the way he apologized wasn’t
that
wholehearted. He’d never actually said
sorry
.

Gabriel hadn’t been touched like that—like he was desirable, an object to be prized—in weeks now.

He didn’t know why he hadn’t just gone and found some other guy to fill that need after the… breakup, or whatever… but he hadn’t.

A sick part of him wanted Austin to keep going, just so he could feel like he had something valuable in him again.

But then, he saw Briar’s face in his mind.

“I can’t. I want to go.”

“Where?”

That was a cruel reminder: he had no work to get to, no friends to see. Paulo was busy in Sao Paulo or Singapore or something. Jon and Adam were out on a tour. His other friends? Acquaintances that were gone now, like they’d never known him.

But there was someone whose door would always be open to him. His gut instinct told him that.

“To see Briar.”

Austin’s expression turned ugly in a heartbeat. “You really wanna never work again? I thought I’d done a good enough job of that.”

The color drained from Gabriel’s cheeks. “What?”

“But I’ve got the next cologne season now. That’s the main thing taken care of. Jordan’s collaborating with them in their show. It’s all settled.”

Gabriel felt sick.

Had he been so sorry for himself all month that he’d missed the wheels and cogs in motion all around him? Was he really that naive?

Fuck, he wasn’t just stupid, but he kept
being
stupid.

He was a pawn in their games, in their shitty lifestyle, unless he did something.

And there was one thing he could think of, and he thought the man would be enough of a good man to accept it.

He was rising to his feet when Austin rose, too. “Wait. There’s one thing I haven’t told you about.”

“When’s rent due? You got it covered?”

For a moment, he sounded compassionate, but Gabriel caught himself before he bought in. The cold ease with which he’d just told him he’d used the
fuck
out of him stopped him from believing it now.

“What business is it of yours? You’d be happier if I didn’t,” Gabriel snapped.

“I have one event for you,” Austin told him. “I was gonna do it, but it’s… a bit beneath me now.”

Gabriel ground his teeth. He wished he could be
certain
Briar would have his back, but he really couldn’t blame him if he turned his back on him for turning his back on
him
in turn.

“What is it?” he managed at last.

That was the killing blow to his ego: not being able to walk out on the asshole on the spot, because he needed the money too much.

“A cocktail party. They want a couple hot models. Underwear-only. You’d be the centerpiece. Maybe even get some tips if you wear a hot G-string.”

Just this one job. Just to pay rent. Then I go to Briar.

As Gabriel leaned on the bus shelter, it took everything he had not to throw up beside it.