Exquisite Betrayal (23 page)

“
Maybe.”

I rifle through her things until I find what
I’m seeking. And, damn, if it isn’t the sweetest thing ever. It’s a
light gray, short nightgown that barely covers her ass. It’s
designed to be cute rather than sexy, but it fails miserably. The
sleeveless thing has a neckline that dips to a V and shows off her
lovely cleavage, and doesn’t that just want to make me put my mouth
right there and start licking her? She’s positively edible in the
thing.

“
Fuck it all, Fallon.” I swallow, with
great difficulty as she smiles sweetly at me. I turn around and
head to the bathroom.

When I return about ten minutes later, she’s
lying in bed, smiling. “Are you feeling better now?”

“
You’re a little imp, you
know?”

Her arm reaches for me. I divest myself of
my clothing except my boxers and clasp her hand as I slide in next
to her.

“
You know you fit perfectly right
here,” I tell her as I pull her into the curve of my body. She
feels like she has been made for me and I wonder if she
was.

“
I miss not sleeping with you, Ryland
Thomas. Would it be bad for me to say I want you here every
night?”

I smile against her hair. “No, it
would be very good, Fallon.” I breathe her in, letting her scent
wash over me.
No, this would not be bad at
all
, I think as I fall asleep with her in my
arms.

There’s nothing I love more than to
wake up in Ryland Thomas’s arms. Well, maybe there is, but
since
that’s
off limits for
the time being, this is my next favorite thing. I roll on my back
so I can look at him. His face is nothing short of perfection to
me. The sculpted cheekbones that dip to slight hollows where I love
to press my lips. That adorable nose of his, and how it has the
tiniest bump on the bridge, which makes me wonder if he broke it in
a fight or something. Then there’s his mouth… I can’t even get
started on it because I’ll go off the deep end in naughty thoughts
about what it does to me. But if I were to have to name one
favorite thing, I would have to choose his eyes; intense, yet
sometimes soft. Vivid and bold, but at times shy and timid; emerald
pools with golden lines radiating from his pupils that bewitch me.
I can fall into them and stay lost for days.

I must’ve made some kind of noise, probably
a sigh, because his thick, caramel lashes flutter open, and there I
am, looking right into those perfect pools of green.

“
Mmmm. Morning gorgeous.” His voice is
thick with sleep.

“
And the same to you.” I brush his
hair from his face and he catches my hand, pressing a kiss to it.
Then I find myself pulled on top of him and he’s grinding his hips
against me.

“
I’m resigned to the fact that I will
be forever stiff around you.”

I snuggle into his neck. “You’re just saying
that. My friends say that all guys wake up that way.”

“
Uh-huh. And I don’t just wake up this
way, gorgeous. It’s an all day thing, love.” He wiggles a little
more. So I wiggle back. “Uh, Fallon, that might not be such a grand
idea.”

“
You started it.” I lift my head and
look at him. I wiggle again, but his hands clamp on my hips,
stilling me.

“
Yes, I did. And I made a mistake. If
you keep moving, I’ll make a mess.”

“
Who cares? I don’t.” I start to slide
my hips against him again, and he lets me. His eyes slip into that
half-closed position so I know he’s getting into it.

“
Jesus, Fallon,” he groans, so I keep
going. I’m as turned on as he is because he’s hitting my spot just
right. I straddle his hips so the contact is better and now I
groan, too. I rotate and move up and down him. Damn, this is
feeling so good. He grabs my hips and presses me tightly against
him as he rocks against me.

“
Ah, yeah, that’s good right there,” I
tell him and he continues with that motion. The feeling is building
in both of us now. Our breathing is fast and my hand is squeezing
his shoulder. I’m going to come. My thighs start pressing against
his.

He knows it somehow because he says, “That’s
it, love, let it go.”

It happens. I’m tightening all over, inside
and out, and I’m crying out his name. I feel him shudder then hear
him groan as he calls my name and we both lie there, breathing hard
as we come down from our orgasmic high.

“
Wow,” he says. Then his mouth takes
mine and I’m feeling the heat build in me again. I’m flipped to my
back and my panties are gone as his hand finds me, fingers sliding
into me, stroking in and out. It doesn’t seem possible, but I’m
right back in the middle of the biggest turn on where my need for
him is incredible.

“
Hey, can you, please? I need you.
Inside of me. Please.”

He kisses me instead and his hand is
what I’ll have to settle for. The climax is great. I mean, whoever
had a bad one, right? But I want
him.
I want to feel
him
inside of me, not his hand, so I tell
him.

“
I want that, too, love. But not
yet.”

“
Then when?”

“
We’ll know.”

“
I already know. Seriously, we’re
coming all over each other. What difference does it
make?”

“
A huge one. When we take that step
the next time, it’ll be with love, Fallon. Not lust.”

Well, fuck me. I’m speechless.

He looks at me and smiles. “Now do you
understand?”

I nod. I have to know. I think I already do,
but I have to know for sure. “Do you think it will happen?”

“
I
know
it will. I just don’t know
when.”

I then kiss him with everything I have.

***

That afternoon we’re sitting together on the
couch, both typing on our laptops. He’s working on a scene in his
book while I write a review.

“
Can I ask you something?”

“
Sure,” I say as I look up at
him.

“
When you read a love scene, what
draws you in?”

The question throws me because it’s
unexpected. “I think the sexual tension at the beginning, but then
the plain, old heat gets me every time.”

He grins at my answer. “Okay. Do you want to
go down to the wharf?”

“
Now?” I ask and then laugh at his
randomness.

“
Yeah,” he says. “Let’s get out and
enjoy the afternoon. I want to walk around and look at those silly
shops down there, while holding your hand. Maybe buy some candy…
you know, that awful stuff that’s really bad for you and sticks in
your teeth.”

“
You hate that stuff.”

“
No, I love it,” he confesses. “I just
never buy it ‘cause it’s so terrible for you. What do you
say?”

How can I turn down an offer like that?
“Only if you promise to take me by a chocolatier.”

We spend the afternoon doing touristy
things, eating sweets and other junk until my stomach aches from it
all. When we make it home, it’s dark and almost seven o’clock.

“
What would you like for dinner?”
Ryland Thomas asks.

Groaning, I say, “Nothing. I’m sick.”

He laughs. “You didn’t have to eat all of
it.” He’s referring to the giant chocolate bar I demolished. And
the funnel cake. And the hot fudge sundae.

“
I couldn’t help it. It was so good,”
I squeak.

“
Come here.”

He sits on the couch and I lie next to him
with my head in his lap. He starts to rub my tummy.

“
Feel that?” I ask. “That’s the belly
of a glutton.”

He laughs at me, continuing to rub.

I’m just beginning to relax when the sound
of my phone ringing interrupts my belly rub. I dig in my back
pocket and pull it out to see it’s my mom calling.

“
Oh, hell,” I mumble then look at
Ryland Thomas. “It’s my mom.”

“
Hi, Mom.”

“
Fallon, you never call me
anymore.”

“
It’s because I have a lot going on,
Mom.”

“
Well, you’d think you could spare a
few minutes for your mother.”

“
Yeah, like you always spare a few
minutes for me?”

“
Don’t get smart with me.”

“
I’m sorry, Mom, but I work a lot. You
know I have a new job.”

“
Well, if you’d call me sometime, you
might find out how much the creditors are after you. I’m having to
fend off calls left and right, so you need to pay that credit card
off. I’m tired of dealing with them already. And why are you in
such debt? You should be more responsible. I thought I taught you
better than that.”

Rage threatens to explode from me, yet worse
than that, I want to break down. I can’t get past how uncaring she
is. Why does she do this to me? Why can’t she see that I’m trying
and that my finances have been stretched to the limit?

“
I’m sorry you’re having to deal with
them, Mom. I’ll take care of it as soon as I can.” My voice is
cracking.

“
See that you do, Fallon.”

She makes a few other remarks to me and
that’s it. She never asks how my new job is going, how my new
apartment is, how I like living in San Francisco, nothing. Every
time I talk to her, I tell myself I won’t get upset, but I do. It
kills me that she doesn’t have a caring bone in her body for me. My
hands go to my face and I rub my eyes. Sitting up, I take a deep,
cleansing breath, trying to will myself not to cry. Will I ever get
over this feeling of abandonment?

Ryland Thomas’s hand covers mine and at
first I’m shocked. My mom’s cruel selfishness has been so
encompassing, I’ve forgotten about him.

“
Everything okay?” he asks.

“
Nothing is okay that involves my
mom.”

His hand rubs my tummy again and I sigh.

“
What happened?”

Thoughts race through my head. Should I tell
him? I know if I do, he’ll want to take care of everything for me
and I don’t want that. I want to handle this on my own. However, I
know if I don’t tell him, he’ll feel left out and hurt. So I just
go for it and explain the whole thing. As I do, his body
tenses.

“
How much?”

“
I don’t want you to…”

“
Fallon, you can repay me. I don’t
want your credit tarnished or your nasty mum on your back. How
much?”

Immediately, I start making excuses for the
amount, but he takes my face in his hands. “Love, I don’t need
those. You needed to live. You had no money.” Then those warm arms
are embracing me, letting me know everything’s going to be just
fine.

“
Thank you. For
everything.”

“
Fallon, I’m here for you. You know
that, right?”

I nod as I look into his beautiful eyes.

“
I’m sure I’m not the best one to give
advice here because my relationship with my folks was damn good,
but it seems to me that she causes you an immense amount of
heartache. We don’t have a choice who are parents are. You’ve lived
with this hurt she forces on you for far too long.”

His words settle into me, but I’m not quite
sure what to make of them. “So what are you saying?”

He gets up and drops down in front of me so
he can look at me. He’s reaching for my hand when he says, “Maybe
it’s time to cut your losses.”

“
She’s my mom. How can I do
that?”

“
Let me ask you this. You’re her
daughter. Does she treat you with respect?”

“
No,” I murmur.

“
Sweetheart, I’m not asking you these
things to make you hurt more. I’m trying to help you.”

“
I know, but it hurts when I think of
how she treats me. And honestly, she couldn’t care less about
me.”

“
Being a parent is a two way street,
love. You are supposed to respect your children as much as they
should respect you. She shows you none. But my point here is that
it’s not going to change. The hurt will keep on hurting unless you
stop allowing it.”

“
So, are you saying I should just walk
away from her for good?”

“
No, I’m saying that you had no choice
in who your mum is. She is who she is. She’s not going to change.
So you need to change the way you deal with her. Change your
expectations, or don’t deal with her at all.”

“
You make so much sense. And you also
make it sound so easy.”

“
Oh, Fallon, don’t mistake me. It
won’t be easy. If you decide to walk away from her, it may be the
hardest thing you’ve ever done. And not letting her words and
actions get to you will be equally as hard. But lowering your
expectations would help a lot. Like when she calls, don’t ever
expect her to ask about how things are going for you. You already
know she won’t, so why build yourself up for a huge
disappointment?”

How can this man know so much? I throw my
arms around him and hug him. “You’re absolutely right. I always
have this tiny spark of hope that, one day, she’ll see that I’m not
a worthless girl.”

“
If I ever think for one second that
you believe that, I’m going to personally knock some sense into
that beautiful head of yours. Understand?