Faithful Heart (17 page)

“That’s nice to know,” she said with a faint smile. The wails and screams were not muffled now, and they sent cold chills down her back.

“The worst patients are in that section.” Carroll pointed to the hallway on their left. “We’ll tour the other two first.”

Dottie wasn’t sure she wanted to go down that hallway at all. In fact, she wasn’t sure she wanted to go down
any
hallway. She suppressed the desire to turn and run. She had to know what Jerrod would face if he ever came here.

All three halls were busy with white-clad male attendants moving in and out of the rooms that lined both sides. Dottie spotted two nurses carrying trays, their feminine forms looking out of place among the muscular attendants. She shuddered to think of Jerrod in this place at the height of one of his spells. She was sure it would take three or four men to subdue him.

“Take a look in here,” Dr. Carroll said as they approached the first cell door.

Each cell had a steel door with a small open window. Dottie glanced down the hall and saw a man’s arm reaching through a window, as if he were trying to grasp something. She hesitated before going any closer to the first door.

“Why don’t they have glass in the windows?” she asked.

“The inmates would ram their fists through the glass and cut themselves.”

“What about wire mesh? I mean, should they be allowed to reach into the hallway like that?”

“There’s no harm done as long as you don’t get close enough for them to grab you. We have to have the windows so we can see inside at any time. They would only cut themselves on wire mesh, too.”

Dottie steeled herself and peered through the small opening of the first cell. Two elderly women sat at a tiny table, drawing on pieces of cardboard with chunks of charcoal. They looked up and smiled, but their eyes appeared hollow, empty.

Dr. Carroll leaned close to the window and spoke as he would to small children. “Hello, Sadie. Hello, Matilda. Are you having fun with your artwork?”

Suddenly, one of them stood up, anger on her wrinkled features, and threw the piece of charcoal against the stone wall. Her eyes were wild as she ran to the door screaming, “You did it again! You hate me, don’t you? That’s what it is! I know it! You hate me!”

“I’m sorry, Matilda,” the doctor said. “I forgot. I should have said ‘Hello,
Matilda’
first this time.”

Matilda’s gray hair stood out in every direction. She shook her head and screamed, then thrust her arm through the window. Dr. Carroll stepped back out of reach. Matilda screamed obscenities at the doctor and tried to grab him, her fingers curled into claws. An attendant came up behind them, grasped the woman’s wrist, and gently pushed her arm back inside.

“Quiet down, Matilda,” he said quietly. “Go back and play with Sadie.”

Matilda gave the doctor a murderous look, shifted it to the attendant, then turned away. As she moved back to the table where her cell mate had remained, she hissed, “They’re all against me, Sadie! They hate me because I’m smarter than they are, and they know it! They should be in here, not me!”

Dr. Carroll patted Dottie’s arm. “Don’t be afraid. You’re safe.”

Dottie shuddered and moved along as he led her down the hall. The ceilings were high throughout the building, and the howls and screams and moans resounded off the stone walls.

As they slowly passed cell after cell, Dottie said, “I noticed Matilda’s fingernails were clipped really short.”

“We keep all the inmates fingernails trimmed like that so they can’t scratch anyone … even themselves. We can’t let them have pencils either or they’d be jabbing each other’s eyes out.”

Dottie nodded, but her eyes betrayed her alarm.

“This asylum is far better than most in the United States, Mrs. Harper,” Dr. Carroll said. “I spent a month at Bethlehem Royal Hospital in England before taking charge here. They taught me a lot. I’ve made many changes in my four years as staff chief.”

Another man had his arm out a window, shouting that he needed water. An attendant was headed his direction, carrying a tin pitcher.

“Bethlehem Royal Hospital … isn’t that the one known as Bedlam?” Dottie asked.

“Yes. It’s hardly called that any more, though.”

“It’s been there a long time, hasn’t it?”

“It was founded by Simon Fitz-Mary, sheriff of London, in 1247. It was the first asylum for the insane in England, and with the exception of one in Grenada, Spain, the first in Europe.
Actually it was called Hospital of St. Mary of Bethlehem when Fitz-Mary founded it, and the name Bedlam apparently came from an old English word for Bethlehem. During the next three hundred years, the asylum was infamous for the brutal treatment of inmates—and we got our word
bedlam
to describe any scene of uproar or confusion.”

“I assume it’s no longer called Bedlam because the patients are treated much better now,” Dottie said.

“It’s the best facility for the mentally disturbed in the world, as far as I’m concerned. They taught me so many good things that I’ve put into practice here, or am planning to put into practice as soon as possible.”

The tour continued, and the sight of blank-eyed patients drooling on themselves or talking to themselves in meaningless phrases almost made Dottie sick. She couldn’t bear the thought of admitting Jerrod there.

The second hall consisted of wards instead of cells. The wards contained those patients whose families or estates could not afford to pay half the cost of a semi-private cell.

Dottie was jittery as they turned the corner to begin the tour of the final hall, which was lined with cells that held one person each. Pads were attached to the walls to a height of seven feet, and the floors were padded from wall to wall. These inmates were dangerous and had to be isolated from all others. The wails and screams were louder here and more frequent. Dr. Carroll eased up to the first door on the right and motioned for Dottie to draw near.

“You won’t have to worry about anyone reaching for you in this hall,” he said. “They’re all in chains.”

Dottie moved up beside Dr. Carroll and peered through the
small window. What she saw made her skin crawl. A man about Jerrod’s age was kneeling on the padded floor, eyes glistening with amusement as he clamped his hands around the throat of an imaginary victim. His wrists were shackled with chains linked to a steel ring imbedded in the wall at the rear of the cell. The chains gave off a metallic rattle as the man shook his imaginary victim and hissed through his teeth.

Dottie turned away, throwing her hands to her face, and gasped, “Dr. Carroll, I don’t need to see any more.”

Dr. Carroll put an arm around her, then thought better of it. “All right. I’ll have one of the attendants walk you back to the office.”

They were just turning to leave when there was a loud bang at the end of the hall, followed by a scream. The door of the last cell on the left flew open. A wild-eyed man bolted into the hall with an attendant on his heels. Two more attendants burst through the lobby doors and ran down the hall.

Dottie stood mesmerized. The escapee’s face had an expression of mindless rage as he ran from his pursuer emitting harsh, animal-like cries. The attendant chasing the madman tackled him, and it took only seconds for the three men to subdue him and carry him back toward his cell.

“Sometimes an attendant will get careless and try to work with the patients without chaining them,” Dr. Carroll said. “Too dangerous. I don’t think that young man will make that mistake again.”

Dr. Carroll ushered Dottie toward the double doors. When they reached the lobby, he looked into her eyes and asked, “You all right?”

“Yes,” she nodded, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Just a bit
unnerved.” She took a deep breath and said, “Those attendants are to be commended for the way they handled that poor man. I could tell they were being as gentle as possible.”

“I’ve drilled it into them that the patients must be treated humanely. We have to remind ourselves that though sometimes they act like beasts, they are human beings. It does get a little touchy now and then. Sometimes for the safety of the patients, as well as that of the workers, the wild ones have to be dealt with firmly.”

Dr. Carroll could see that Dottie was troubled. “This has upset you, Mrs. Harper,” he said softly. “I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have let you see the place.”

“Oh, no. It’s best that I
did
see it. I know now that I could never let Jerrod be admitted here.”

“But Mrs. Harper, you and the children are in danger. Can’t you see that?”

“Yes, but … but I love my husband, Doctor, as much as a wife can love her husband. I just couldn’t let him come here. And I’m afraid. Afraid that if I get him to come to see you for the sedative treatment, you might see that he’s admitted by force.”

Carroll sighed. “Mrs. Harper, am I understanding correctly? Are you going to go to San Bruno and tell Sheriff Donner to release your husband? Are you going to go back to the same old thing?”

“Well, I—”

“Please, listen to me. If you can’t bring yourself to leave Jerrod locked up, and you won’t make him come to me, at least leave him in that jail long enough to pack up your children and go back to Kansas. Certainly you have family back there who would take you in, don’t you?”

“You mean leave Jerrod and go back to Kansas?”

“Well, if that’s too far, isn’t there somewhere you and the children can go where you’ll be safe?”

“Dr. Carroll, I took a vow when I married Jerrod to stay with him till death parts us. My vows are sacred to me. I can’t just go off and leave him!” Tears filmed Dottie’s eyes and her lower lip quivered. A sob forced its way from her throat. “It isn’t Jerrod’s fault that he’s this way. The real Jerrod is a kind, good man who loves me and loves his children.”

“Mrs. Harper, I understand about Jerrod. I also understand about
you
. He has a wounded mind, yes, but you have a wounded
heart
. You’re carrying much more than you should. You’ve endured this pain longer than any wife should have to. You must do something to protect yourself and your children.”

Dottie was quiet for some time as she wiped away her tears. Finally, she said, “All right, I’ll go to the jail. If Jerrod will promise to come see you, I’ll have Sheriff Donner release him.”

“And if he won’t promise?”

“I don’t know. I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. I’ll be praying that he
will
promise, but you have to promise me that you won’t try to put him in the asylum.”

“All right,” the doctor said reluctantly, “but only if I see improvement. If not—”

“You
will
see improvement, Doctor. I’m sure of it. I must go now.”

“I’ll have one of the attendants walk you to your wagon.”

“That’s not necessary,” she said, smiling thinly. “I can make it all right.”

“I have a staff meeting in just a few minutes or I’d walk you myself,” he said, moving along with her as she headed for the
door. Dottie stepped onto the boardwalk and told him he would hear from her by tomorrow.

Dr. Matthew Carroll stood and watched her walk away. He admired her resolve to stick by her marriage vows and love her husband with everything that was in her. His heart went out to her. She bore a load few women would hold up under.

D
EPUTY
M
YRON
H
ALL
looked up from the sheriff’s desk and smiled as Dottie Harper came through the door. He thought she looked awfully tired as he rose to his feet and said warmly, “Good afternoon, Mrs. Harper.”

“Good afternoon, Deputy,” she said, trying to smile. “I’ve come to talk to Jerrod about putting himself under Dr. Carroll’s care. If he’ll agree to see the doctor—which I’m sure he will—I’ll take him with me.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t have the authority to release him. Only Sheriff Donner can do that. He won’t be back until quite late this afternoon. Five o’clock, at least.”

“I see,” she said. “Well … first things first. I’ll go ahead and talk to Jerrod about it, then come back at five.”

“Sure, ma’am.” The deputy nodded and moved toward the door to the cell block. “There’s another prisoner in here now. In the cell right next to Jerrod’s.”

“Oh?”

“Yes’m. As a matter of fact, we had ’em both in the same cell till I decided to change things.”

“And what made you decide to change?”

“It was your preacher, ma’am.”

“My preacher?”

“Yes’m. He was here this mornin’ to see your husband, and while he was visitin’ him, the other prisoner caused a little trouble. The reverend told me about it when he come out. Said it looked like Jerrod was gonna mop up the floor with him, so he suggested I move the other guy into another cell. The reverend was afraid Jerrod might lose control and hurt the man real bad. I think he didn’t want Jerrod in any more trouble than he’s already in.”

“I appreciate that,” she said.

“Anyway, ma’am, you won’t have any privacy back there … that’s the point I was tryin’ to make.”

“Thank you, Deputy. I guess it doesn’t make any difference if the other man hears me talking to my husband.”