Fall Forever (Fall For Me) (12 page)

BOOK: Fall Forever (Fall For Me)
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Regan snuck a quick look at Rafe
before he started upstairs to shower and dress. He glanced back at her at that
exact same moment. He caught her gaze unexpectedly and a small smile crept
across his lips.

His smile was like the sun shining
through a window, lighting up everything it touched,
warming
everything it touched. The startling feeling it stirred in
Regan made her gasp.

“Oh!”

She had to look away. Had to. So
she could breathe.

Her heart felt as though it was
going to burst as she ran upstairs to her room and flung herself across her
bed. There she lamented. Why oh why had she just stared at him like that? It
was embarrassing. And crazy. And weird.

She desperately wished she had
handled everything differently. She wished she’d like, actually spoken, said
something meaningful or comforting. Or anything.
Anything at
all.
Now it was too late. He must think she was a freak-o spaz, the way
she’d just stood there, gawking at him. Of course, he’d done the same … but it
was different for him. Way different. He’d been abducted and abused; he’d been
traumatized. He had an excuse.
A HUGE excuse.
She
didn’t have any.
None at all.
She was just
weird—apparently.

Only … it had been like she was in
a trance. Seriously.
A supernatural trance.
Ugh
.
Whatever
.

Okay, she was weird.
Weird, weird, weird.

 

***

 

Regan could hear music coming from
Rafe’s room. A guitar. It made her stop lamenting about him, and
catch
her breath as a strange sensation washed through
her—a yearning to be near him. It was almost impossible to resist.

As if Rafe were the Pied Piper
himself, leading her with his music, she woke to find herself standing outside
of his closed bedroom door, transfixed. The music was haunting. Beautiful.

She put her hand on the doorknob,
but didn’t dare go into the room. Instead, she squeezed her eyes shut.
This is crazy!
Yet the music called to
her.
Stirred things inside her that she didn’t understand,
things that made her long to be near Rafe.

Regan,
don’t do this. You’re going to make an idiot of yourself.

She couldn’t do as she wished,
though—go back to her room. She stood frozen, listening to the
breathtaking music, her heart in her throat. And
her soul
wanting to be on the other side of the door
.

However, the instant Rafe’s music
stopped, Regan blinked, as though waking from a dream. What was she doing here?

Confused, she snatched her hand
from the doorknob, ready to scramble back to her room, but immediately Rafe
opened his door. Regan sucked in her breath.

They stared at each other.

Rafe’s breathing seemed to grow as
rapid as Regan’s pounding heart.

He tilted his head. “Do you want to
come in?”

He opened the door further for her,
but Regan didn’t move. Indecisiveness flickered in her eyes. She didn’t want to
explain why she couldn’t come in, but she couldn’t come in. She wasn’t ready.
Not yet. It was silly, she knew that, and she wished desperately that things
were different, but she had to get used to him. Right now he was like a boy to
her—a guy.

Rafe bit his lip, watching her.

His warm brown eyes stayed locked
on hers. Slowly, carefully, he held out his hand to her. The unexpected gesture
made Regan’s heart pound.

A lump growing in her throat, she
stared at the outstretched hand offered to her.
I should be offering him
my
hand.
He’s finally home and I’m being
silly
.

Rafe
is
finally
home
. The
awesome thought seeped inside her anew, filling her once again with
heart-pounding awe.

Almost whimpering, Regan clasped
her hand in his and with it came a rush of warmth.

She brought the back of his hand up to
her face and brushed it softly against her cheek, wondering if he was used to
love and affection, and if the people that had taken him from them had treated
him kindly. “I’m so glad you’re home.”

Rafe gave her hand a gentle squeeze
but didn’t speak as he backed away, leading her into his room. She was shocked
by the overwhelming scent of cigarette smoke that engulfed her as they entered.
The smell almost gagged her as she tried to breathe when he shut the door.

Incredulous, she gasped. “Mom and
dad let you smoke in here?”

“Uh, yeah, they do.” He found a
blue t-shirt on his cluttered floor and slipped it over his head. “My
doctor—Dr. Heath—told them to. He says
smoking’s
an outlet for me. They only let me smoke in my room though, not the rest of the
house.”

She liked his voice a lot. It was
husky, and kind of seductive in an innocent sort of way. Meaning, it was just
the way he talked. He wasn’t trying to seduce or anything. Still, she was
certain he must have girls falling at his feet.

“Why’re you smiling at me like
that?” he asked with a nervous laugh.

“I’m just so happy that you’re
here.”

“Yeah?” He gazed at her curiously.
“I have my shirt on now.”

He said it as though he knew that
was the reason she had hesitated to hug him earlier. But how could he know
that?? … Of course he couldn’t, but the way he was gazing at her made her feel
as though he could. It was as though he could read her thoughts. But that was
silly, of course.

Why was she having such strange
feelings today? What was the matter with her? Maybe she was just overemotional
because he was home. Maybe that’s why she felt so confused and shy at his
gaze—she was simply overwhelmed with happiness.

Also,
I practically didn’t get any sleep last night
, she reasoned with herself.
I’m strung out.

Fearful of staring, which she
suddenly seemed to have a tendency to do, she glanced about his room.

“I heard you playing your guitar.”
She noticed he had not one, but two. One was an electric, leaning against his
amp, the other a twelve-string acoustic.

“Yeah.” Rafe picked up the
twelve-string. “Playing’s another outlet for me—at least that’s what the
doctor said. He said playing’s therapeutic.”

Regan could believe that. Listening
to him now as he strummed softly was therapeutic for her as well. It calmed
her.

“You’re really good,” she gushed
with awe. “Where did you learn to play?”

Rafe shrugged, tearing his gaze
away from her. “I didn’t exactly
learn
.
I just play.”

Regan blinked. His music was haunting and
beautiful—the most beautiful music she had ever heard. It did strange
things to her heart and filled her with physical emotion. It was sort of like
being wrapped in a hug, warm and comforting. Yet at the same time, filled her
with longing.

He’s
never taken lessons? How can that be?

Regan sat beside Rafe on the bed,
remembering how his music had called to her. How she had stood outside his door
with her heart pounding. Maybe she had only imagined the awesome beauty of his
music. Maybe she was so thrilled to have him
back,
anything and everything would touch her strangely—touch her soul and fill
her with awe.

She stared at Rafe. She had so many
questions she wanted to ask him, but Donnett had warned her not to pry into his
past. So she asked him something else instead. “Do you remember me?”

Rafe flicked a look in her
direction,
then
quickly looked away. “I sort of
remember you,” he murmured, gazing intently at his guitar. “But, no, not
really.”

“We’re twins,” she informed him,
wondering if he already knew that.

“Yeah,” he smiled. “That’s what
they said.”

“You didn’t remember having a
twin?”

He tensed his jaw muscles, seeming
reluctant to answer. “I hardly remember anything—and what I
remember—” He shook his head, not going on with that thought. “I
kind
of remember you though, sort
of—things about you. Only, I’m not sure what’s real and what’s not.”

Regan was silent a moment, watching
him, wondering why he wouldn’t look at her. “I remember all sorts of things
about you,” she murmured. “But then, I’ve always been here, with pictures and
things to remind me.”

“I didn’t have a picture,” he said
softly.

“No. I know.” Her heart went out to
him as she thought of him as a little boy with nothing to remind him of home or
the people who loved him. She rested her head on his shoulder, wishing that
somehow she could change time.

Rafe put down his guitar. He
stroked her hair lightly,
then
quickly jerked away as
though he’d done something wrong.

He ran a hand over his face,
“Sorry.”

Warm tingles shot through her body
from his gentle touch. But it had felt good, not bad.
So not
bad.

“No! It’s okay,” she protested,
trying to pull him back to her. She rested her head against his chest, sort of
in an awkward half-hug.

Rafe didn’t exactly relax, but she
was shocked that she was able to do this. Normally, being near a boy these days
filled her with unease. But with him she felt lifted to another world,
enveloped in heavenly warmth and comfort. Utter bliss.

And this moment—she felt it
was important. She wanted Rafe to feel loved and welcomed in their home. She
wanted that so bad.
And for them to be like normal brother
and sister—able to hug and show affection.

They sat in silence a moment, not
needing to talk. It was strange being with him like this—so intimate,
hearing his heartbeat. Feeling safe.
And cared for.
She felt that—his love. It seemed to seep through his heart.

Already she felt so close to him
that she didn’t think she could bear going back to school and leaving him. She
never wanted to be away from her twin again, not ever.

“Man, your hair’s beautiful,” he
murmured reverently.

His compliment sent a pleasure
through her that she didn’t understand. Forever she had gotten compliments on
her hair. It was long, and full, and the most amazing color known to
man—at least that’s what she’d often been told. She was used to the
compliment, and it didn’t usually mean that much to her. In fact, after her
horrible experience with Michael, her ex-boyfriend, hearing the compliment from
a boy sent her into a panic. But she didn’t panic hearing the compliment from
Rafe. Hearing it from him brought her nothing but delight.

There was a knock at the front
door. Regan stiffened, not wanting to answer it, afraid if she left, when she
returned Rafe would be gone—poof.
Just another dream.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Rafe
murmured softly, seeming to read her hesitation.

Reluctantly, Regan rose from the comfort
of his arms and grabbed a flannel shirt from off the floor, slipping it over
her leotard as she ran downstairs to answer the persistent knocking.

Regan opened the door … then wished
she hadn’t.

“Uh, Regan. Hi.” Her father’s part-time
assistant, Parker, looked surprised—and delighted—to see her. The
college intern cleared his throat. “Uh. Has your father left already?”

She nodded.

“I was afraid of that.” He gazed at
her longer than he should. “I thought you went to an all-girl school that only
let you out on the weekends.”

“I do,” she answered, not wanting
to explain why she was home. She just wanted him to go away. She didn’t know
Parker all that well, but he was attractive and obviously interested in her, so
he terrified her.

“Regan, can I talk to you for a
minute?”

She tried to protest, but Parker
just barged in, scaring her far more than it should, she knew that, but it
didn’t stop the panic that rose in her chest.

“Look, Regan I think somewhere
there’s been some sort of misunderstanding between us.” He shut the door. “I
didn’t run over your dog or anything, did I?”

“I don’t have a dog,” she murmured,
though she knew what he was getting at.

“Then what have I done?” He came
closer to her as she cowered away. “Why do you act this way?”

If he
wasn’t
scaring her so badly she would have felt sorry for him. He seemed genuinely
hurt by her behavior and he had every right to be, since he’d never been
anything but kind. But she couldn’t help it. She was afraid of him. She just
wanted him to go away.

“Most girls like me,” he said,
coming even nearer. “Why won’t you just give me a chance?” She shrank back in
to the corner of the foyer, ready to scream for Rafe if he came another inch
closer.

“You seem to be afraid of me,” Parker
murmured, “but I have no idea why.” He went to touch her hair, and she begged
him to go away.

“I think you should go,” Rafe said.

That was the first time either
Parker or Regan noticed him standing in the foyer watching them.

“Yeah, I am,” Parker said, eyeing
Rafe curiously, then he brought his gaze back to rest on Regan. “I think you
have me confused with someone else, Regan. I’m not a bad guy.”

When Parker left, Regan stood in
the corner, trying to calm her spazzing heart. She was glad she hadn’t screamed
for Rafe to make Parker leave. But she was glad Rafe came to her rescue just
the same. It made her feel safer knowing that he would be around to protect
her. And, for some reason, she felt he could … protect her.

“Why were you afraid of that guy?”
Rafe asked, after watching her for a moment as she stood in the corner, taking
deep, long breaths, trying to calm her racing pulse.

“She’s afraid of
every
body,” said their little
sister, Carly, as she entered the room. She stood beside Rafe, taking his hand.
She was in her nightgown, and her hair was disheveled from sleep. “You’re up
early,” she said, gazing up at Rafe adoringly.

BOOK: Fall Forever (Fall For Me)
3.1Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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