Falling (21 page)

Emma shakes her head in an effort to physically dislodge her thoughts.
This is crazy-making,
she tells herself.
Dominic hasn't given you any reason to doubt his love.
If anything, he's been refreshingly clear about his feelings. All she needs to do is follow Cece's advice and listen, pay attention to what he's saying, what he's doing. All she needs to do is stay present, and everything will be fine.

“Are you okay?” Dominic looks over at her as she nods and forces a smile. “This is hard for you, isn't it?”

“Not hard,” she says. “But weird. I just didn't expect Jesse's mother to come back. It isn't something I was prepared for.”

Dominic nods. “You and me both. I'm upset, too. All these years I wanted her to want to have a relationship with him, but now that she's here, I just feel anxious. It's going to be okay, though,” he says, more to soothe himself than Emma, it seems. “Whatever happens, we'll figure it out. Maybe next week, after she's gone, you and I can go away for a night? Somewhere romantic?”

Emma startles, remembering the phone call with her mother at the beginning of this endless day. How could she have so completely forgotten? And how could she now tell Dominic what she has done? “Dominic, I can't. I'm so sorry about what I've done. But, well . . . Do you remember I told you about my cousin getting engaged, and my mother throwing him a party in England, how I probably wasn't going to go?”

Dominic nods.

“Well, the last time I spoke to my mother, she was still upset by
my decision. I spoke to her early this morning, when I was so upset, and she was worried about me, and told me she wanted me to come home. At the time, I thought she was right. So I changed my mind. I'm so sorry I forgot to tell you. I've already booked the flight.”

“Oh. Wow. Okay.” Dominic is surprised. “So when are you going?”

“Next week.”

“For how long?”

“Just a few days.”

Dominic pauses. “Why don't I come with you?”

Emma's eyes open in amazement. “Are you serious? You would really come to England?” She frowns. “But you don't have a passport.”

“I do now.”

“What?”

“Well, I got myself one after you seemed so horrified when I was building those shelves for Lisa. I thought maybe one day we could go away on vacation, so I got an expedited one as a surprise.”

Emma starts to laugh. “You want to come and meet my whole family? You think you're ready for the craziness of my childhood home?” She imagines Dominic and her parents, and her laughter gets louder. “Actually, my childhood home isn't all that crazy, and my father's really quite normal, but my mother? Are you sure you're ready for my mother? I'm not sure
I'm
ready for this.” It is impossible for Emma to hide her excitement. “Really? You really want to come?”

“She'll love me.” Dominic grins. “Mothers always love me. I flirt a little, charm a little, and they fall head over heels in love.” He laughs, then adds, “I do want to see where you grew up. And”—he narrows his eyes at her—“I want to see what you'll look like when you're old.”

“Do not tell my mother you think she's old. She'll never let you in the house.” As Emma laughs, she wonders what her mother will make of Dominic. She may well think he's charming. She will certainly
think he is exotic, with his American accent, dark skin, big brown eyes, and strong arms.

“I very much want to meet your parents.” Dominic steps back and leads Emma to the sofa, where they both sit, curled into each other. “I'm really serious about this, Emma. I'm serious about you. I know this is quick, and I know we've only had one proper date, but . . . I don't even know that I should say this . . .”

“Say it,” encourages Emma softly.

“I feel like this is
it
.” He looks at her, and she nods, a lump in her throat. “I can't believe how freaked out I got when I realized you were gone today. It really made me realize that I feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be with you, and I'm who I'm supposed to be. This all feels fated somehow, you moving in, us getting together. It feels
right
. I know you just said you thought we were rushing things, but I also know you understand what I'm talking about. So maybe we shouldn't jump ahead and use . . . the M-word, or anything like that, but I see us together for a long time.”

Emma nods, unable to speak.

“I mean, a really long time. A really,
really
long time. Maybe forever.” He frowns. “I don't want to scare you off. Am I scaring you off?”

“You most definitely are not scaring me off,” says Emma, leaning forward to kiss him. “I've been terrified of saying it out loud. I feel exactly the same way. It feels preordained, even if you and I come from different worlds. I do feel I was meant to meet you, rent your house, for a reason. I do see us together for”—she laughs—“a really, really long time. And I would be thrilled if you came to England. As long as you prepare yourself for my mother.”

“If she's anything like you, I'll adore her.”

Emma lets out a bark of laughter. “She's
nothing
like me.”

“Then I'll just pretend.” He leans his head to kiss her properly, when they both jump apart at the sound of the cat flap.

“Where's Hobbes?” Jesse, just dropped off from a late playdate, let himself into the backyard to crawl through and head straight for the kitten in the corner. “Dad? Can we go to a movie tomorrow? Can we? Please? Pretty please?”

“Hmm. Let me think. I have a lot to do. I just took on a new job to make some cabinets for a nice lady across town.” He watches his face fall. “But, hey, buddy, don't worry, we're heading into the weekend. We can definitely go see something. What do you think, Emma? Want to come with us?”

Emma looks at Jesse, expecting him to make a face, or scowl at her, or shake his head at his father. But instead, much to her surprise, he nods delightedly before running over and grabbing her hand.

“Come on, it'll be fun!”

“Okay,” she says. “I'm in.” And then, to Dominic, “Can I steal you for one second?” Jesse is already on the floor, playing with Hobbes, as Dominic allows himself to be led into the other room, where Emma whispers quietly, “What about Stacy? Weren't you going to the playground with Stacy?”

“Doesn't this sound like a whole lot more fun? I'll text her and maybe Jesse and I will meet her for ice cream in the afternoon. How's that?”

“That sounds perfect,” says Emma, wondering if Dominic believes her, if she is as convincing as she hopes.

E
mma stayed over again. It was as if the blip, if indeed a blip it was, had never happened. In the morning, they had a big breakfast together, then on Saturday they went to the movie Jesse selected. It was a wonderful day. A healing day.

After the movie, Jesse couldn't wait to show Emma the burger bar they always went to after a film. He told Emma which burger she needed to order, and how she needed to eat it—with no tomato, no cucumber, and extra mayo, which Dominic explained was kind of a rule in the family. All in all, for the first time since Jesse walked in and found her in his father's bed, Emma started to feel that they had turned a corner.

Every time she felt a worrying thought about Stacy creep in, she pushed it away. She knows Dominic texted her back, knows they are going to Sweet Frog for frozen yogurt later in the day, but she refuses to worry. The whole situation had exhausted her, emotionally and
physically. The thought of Stacy reentering their lives had seemed so terrifying, but now, after more consideration, Emma can see what a good thing this could be for Jesse. She could almost believe everything she had said to Dominic.

And after Jesse's seesawing emotions since he realized they were together, he seems to have finally accepted her. The three of them seem—she is almost too scared to say this, to even think it, but she can't deny it any longer—the three of them feel like a family.

After lunch they stop at the Athletic Shoe Factory to get Jesse some new sneakers. Dominic wanders off into the store next door as Emma supervises the fitting. The salesman unboxes the pair they'd picked out, and when Jesse tries them on, he tells him to stand up and “walk over to your mom.”

Emma fully expects Jesse to correct him with a snap, to insist she isn't his mother, but Jesse says nothing, merely walks over to Emma, who finds her eyes stinging with happy, relieved tears.

They drive home, Emma enveloped in a warm glow of happiness. Now she is filling Hobbes's bowl with cat food. Dominic is upstairs talking to Jesse, no longer able to put off telling him about the London trip, which requires that they leave him behind so he doesn't miss school. It's not for long, Emma knows, but she's apprehensive about his reaction just the same.

The house is quiet. Emma enjoys the peace for a few minutes before she has to run next door and grab some eggs from her fridge. Just as she turns to go, she hears Jesse raise his voice. She pauses, listening, sorry, though unsurprised, that Jesse is upset. She hears Dominic murmuring in a low voice, although she can't make out what he is saying.

And then she hears Jesse's voice rise again. “I hate her,” he says.

Emma knows it isn't true, yet it feels as if a knife is twisting in her heart.

“I hate her,” he says again. “If she wasn't here, you wouldn't be going to England and I wish she wasn't here.”

“Come on, buddy.” Dominic's voice is soft, placating. “You know you don't hate Emma. I'm only going for a few days and you're going to have fun with Nonna and Papa.”

“I'm not. You've never been away before and I don't even know Nonna and Papa. I don't want you to go. Emma can go by herself! Send her away! I don't want her here anymore. Make her go.”

“You don't mean that,” says Dominic in what Emma has come to recognize as his
soothing
voice. “You love Emma. I know you do. And you love her being around.”

“I do
not
!” screams Jesse, sobbing now. “I
hate
her. You and me are the team. She's not on our team and we don't need her and I don't want her. You keep bringing her on our team and I don't want her anymore. Send
her
to England and you stay here with me.”

“Buddy, I'm sorry you feel that way,” Emma hears Dominic say. “I promise I won't be away for long, but I've already bought my ticket. I know you don't want Nonna and Papa to stay, but remember what happened last time they were here?”

“They've never stayed here.”

“Yes, they have,” says Dominic. “You were about four. They stayed for two nights when I went to a wedding in Rhode Island, and you had chocolate ice cream and cannoli for dinner every night.”

There is a pause. A lowered voice. “I did?”

“Yes. You did,” says Dominic. “And they took you to the toy store and bought you whatever you wanted. That giant bear over there? That was what you wanted. Remember?”

Another pause. “Maybe.”

“I bet they'll do that again. What's your favorite food in the world?”

“French fries.” Jesse is reluctantly being pulled out of his hysteria.

“What else?”

“Chocolate ice cream.”

“What else?”

“Chocolate chip cookies.”

“I can pretty much guarantee that Nonna will give you French fries, chocolate ice cream, and chocolate chip cookies for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. You know what else?”

“What?”

“You know how you think your dad is the best cook in the world? Guess who taught him everything he knows? That's right. Nonna. You think my chicken parm is good, wait till you try Nonna's lasagne. Oh my God, Jesse, you will think you have died and gone to heaven.”

There is a brief silence. “What does that mean? Is that bad?”

“No! It means it's good! It's amazing! It's the best thing you'll ever eat in your life. I'm jealous you're getting to eat all that amazing food and not me.” He pauses, then frowns. “I don't know about the toy store, though.”

“What do you mean, you don't know?”

“Maybe I should tell them not to take you. All those things you don't want. Those
Star Wars
things. That Lego. The stuff you never talk about when you watch TV and see those ads.”

Emma can practically hear Jesse smiling as his father teases him. “What I really want is a hoverboard.”

“Then you better let Nonna and Papa stay here, because I'm not planning any trips to the toy store soon, but I guarantee they
are
. Although . . . I think you may be a little young for a hoverboard.”

“Okay,” grumbles Jesse, whose heart is no longer in the protest. “Do you think they'll take me to Skyzone, too?”

“Most definitely. Why don't you and I make a list of all the fun
stuff you're going to do when I'm away? And listen, buddy? There's something else I need to talk to you about, too.”

“What is it?”

“Come sit down with me, buddy. I need to talk to you about your mother. You know how you sometimes ask me questions about her, and want to know what she's like?” There is a pause and Emma imagines Jesse's nod. “You know she hasn't lived here for a long time, but I just found out that she's back in town for a visit.” He pauses again and she pictures Jesse's eyes widening in surprise. “I know this is a lot for you, and it's totally fine if you don't want to see her. But she has asked me if she can meet you. She knows all about what a fantastic kid you are, and she wants to get to know you. But if you don't want to, that's absolutely fine. This is all up to you.”

Jesse seems to be processing all this big information.

“If you want to, I thought maybe we could meet her for ice cream later today. What do you think?”

Emma holds her breath.

“Ice cream?” says Jesse. “Where?”