Falling Darkness: The second book in the Falling Awake Series (27 page)

“Guilty,” I said.

“Wow.”

“Pretty awesome, right?” Mellissa nudged me in the arm. This was too weird, her knowing this about me. I was starting to feel abnormal. The only real thing I had in my life was mine and her friendship but now my abnormality was out there and I could never take it back. I’d lost the only thing that kept me sane and I just had to hope that it only made me and her stronger. I had to believe I’d done the right thing in telling her. I couldn’t deal with any other outcome. She was fine now but what if later, realization sunk in and she freaked?

“You gotta get in now.” Quidel dropped his board onto the sand and zipped down his wet suit, kicking it to the floor. I was relieved to see he had on shorts underneath. Matoskah and Skah kicked off their suits and running into the sea, dove in head first as soon as it was deep enough. “It’s like summer out here,” Quidel shouted over to us. “Hurry up and get in.”

“I haven’t got a bathing suit,” I shouted back.

“Grab my t-shirt. It’s over by the fire,” Matoskah said.

With Matoskah and Quidel’s shirts hanging down almost to our knees over our underwear, Mellissa and I were ready to get in the water. I was fastening my hair tightly on the top of my head in a wayward bun and I couldn’t stop myself from glancing at Rona. She hadn’t budged from that fire and I was starting to feel a little sorry for her. It was kinda my fault she was sitting here bummed out. Well it was my fault in her eyes. I felt bad enjoying myself while she was here sulking.

“I’ll catch up,” I said to Mellissa, before she headed out to get in the water.

I sat down next to Rona. “Don’t you want to come with us?” She looked just as unhappy as before and I figured it wouldn’t kill me to give it one last go at making friends.

“No thank you.”

I was cold with just this t-shirt for cover and I rubbed my hands up and down my legs, trying to get some heat from the friction. The whole beach was empty apart from us and I felt tiny in comparison to the cliffs that surrounded us, towering high, with spruce trees lining the whole perimeter. It looked wild out there, and it brought my thoughts back to Sabre. I hated to think that he might have followed me. Might be out there now… watching me. I hoped I hadn’t made a mistake in coming here.

“… just because your mom lived here.”

“What?” I looked at Rona. I hadn’t even been aware she was speaking. I was miles away, my thoughts in a much darker place.

“Just because your mom lived here, doesn’t mean you know anything about us, or this land. You don’t know anything.”

I was stunned. “I never said I did.”

“You don’t belong here,” she went on.

“I’m well aware of where I belong. My home is back in San Juan Island, and I don’t think any different. I only came here to get away for a while.”

Rona snorted. “What could you possibly need to get away from?”

“Everything,” I said. “I know what you think but you couldn’t be more wrong. I’m not interested in Matoskah and I never will be. I know what it feels like to want someone more than you think your heart can stand and they don’t return even a shred of the same feelings. I know exactly how that feels.” When a sigh slipped through Rona’s lips, I said, “But you don’t even know whether or not he feels the same way because you haven’t told him. At least I had the guts to get a real answer. I have a right to feel pissed off because I wasn’t a coward.” I was starting to think that might not have been the best approach when Rona laughed, breaking the silence. I think that was the first time I’d head that noise from her.

“So you were rejected?”

That was making her smile? She was sadistic. “In so many words, yeah. And not only that, rejected for the head cheerleader who rumor has it puts out more than the trash.” That really made Rona laugh. “I’m glad my misfortune can cheer you up.” I wasn’t really. She was kinda irritating me. She could be a little less thrilled.

“I’m sorry. It’s not funny.” She killed her audacious smile. “It’s not funny at all, it just made me feel better. I’m terrible, aren’t I?”

“You really are,” I said, and no longer able to keep a straight face, we both started laughing. “Ugh,” I exhaled. “You need to just tell him if the alternative is you living every day with a face like that. It’s really not fair on anyone. Seriously, what is the worst that can happen?”

“He laughs at me. Think’s it’s the most hilarious thing that he’s ever heard. I’m just Q’s little sister to him. He doesn’t see me any other way.”

“Then you need to make him. Guys can be blind to what’s right in front of them. You need to make him notice you.” I glanced at Rona, analyzing her. She was very pretty, not just pretty. Her hair was a few inches past her shoulders, black and glossy. She really did look so much nicer when she was smiling. Her brown eyes, were slanted just slightly at the corners and her lips were full and naturally red. “Matoskah is a fool if he thinks you’re anything other than beautiful and he doesn’t deserve you.”

Rona gave me a faltering smile. “I really wish you weren’t this nice. It was easier to hate you. However you feel, Matoskah still looks at you the way I wish he would look at me.”

“Like I said, you need to make him. Now come on, I’m sick of talking about boys. Let’s go and have some fun. It’s freezing sitting here.” And that was the truth. I was sick of talking about them. I was free of Caleb for a few days and I wasn’t about to get bogged down with more disappointing love stories.

The warm water was a stark contrast to the cold night air and I loved every bit of it. Quidel hoisted me up onto his shoulders. Mellissa was sitting ready on Skah’s and Rona apprehensively climbed up onto Matoskah’s. I gripped onto the top of Quidel’s head until he ducked his head out of my grasp. “Not, so tight,” he said. “You’ll put holes in me.”

“Oops, sorry.” I put my hands onto his shoulders instead and with less exertion. We were going to attempt volleyball. First team to drop the ball was out and then the winning team would pick forfeits for the losers.

“We’ve got this,” Quidel said, just about to fold his fingers around my knees, but slapped me hard on my thighs instead.

“Ow!”

“You ready?” he asked.

“If you’re done assaulting me.”

“Just getting you pumped.”

“You are so going down,” Mellissa shouted over to us.

“Sorry, I don’t speak loser,” Quidel shouted back and tossed his outstretched palm up to me and I slapped him high five. Oh, it was on. Matoskah slammed the ball into air with his palm and the game started. Each wave that curled in was unsteadying and every few minutes one of us girls would topple over and land in the water. For about the tenth time, I climbed back up onto Quidel’s shoulders. Mellissa and Skah were out. They sat on the sand, legs outstretched watching the game. I whacked the ball into the air, aiming it at Rona and she slammed it back to me with just as much force. Quidel gripped my legs tighter when I was just about to take a tumble from leaning too far forward and I sent the ball flying back to Rona. It was like watching slow motion when she dropped into the water head first, trying to hit the ball.

“Yes!” Quidel shouted. I leaned forward, wrapping my arms around his neck. His hands came up behind me and pulled me down into the water, right over the top of him and I squealed all the way down. I surfaced and my hair was loose, my hair tie lost somewhere in the sea. I pushed it all back out of my face before grabbing Quidel and dragging him under. I felt his arms take hold around my legs and the next thing, I was tugged back under. He broke the surface before me and we were both laughing. I couldn’t remember when I’d last had so much fun. When we were all out, dressed and dried, we sat back around the fire, Quidel and I deciding what punishments to dish out.

“I’ve got it,” Quidel said. He was dressed in dark blue jeans with a light grey and blue baseball style hoodie and black lace up boots. He had put in small, square cut diamond earrings in each ear, and I knew Mellissa must be deeply cut up from Drake or she would made some comment about him by now. All three boys were good looking in their own way but Quidel was probably the most obvious. Matoskah won with the best eyes. The only other person I could think of whose eyes were more beautiful was…

“Skah, go up to that beach house over there, the one with the two bikes out front and kiss whoever answers the door.” Quidel said, looking overly satisfied with himself.

“What if it’s a dude?” asked Skah, looking not so thrilled about the idea. I could see Matoskah laughing out the corner of my eye but Rona looked nervous, probably worried what was coming next for her.

Quidel stood up and threw Skah his sneakers. “You pucker up,” he said with a touch of snark.

Skah grabbed the sneakers and slid his feet into them, quickly tying them up. “You’re an asshole,” he said to Quidel. But like a good sport, he stood up and jogged over the pebbly sand until he was knee deep in the tall wispy beachgrass. He didn’t even slow climbing up the steps to the log house with the lights on inside. It was one of three holiday homes by the entrance of the beach before it gave way to the resort. I was anxious for him, thinking who might open the door. Three fast knocks at the door and within seconds it was opened by a girl around our age with shoulder length blonde hair, looking confused. Skah wasn’t wasting any time. He grabbed her face in his hands and went in for the kiss. Everyone burst into hushed laughter around the bonfire and after the kiss went on way longer than expected, Skah finally let the girl go. She looked shocked with an undertone of pleasantly surprised. She looked like she enjoyed it.

“Lucky son of a bitch,” Matoskah mumbled. “She’s hot.”

When a man who looked like he could be the girl’s father stepped up behind her to see what was going on, Skah gave her the flash of a flat handed wave and bolted. The door was closed loudly behind him and he dropped down back in his space by the fire. “Too easy,” he boasted, trying to catch his breath.

“You wouldn’t be saying that if it was her dad who answered the door,” Quidel griped.

Rona agreed, smiling at Skah. “Now that, I Would like to have seen.”

Skah rearranged his hair that was now partly hanging loose around his face.

“I’ll do that for you,” Rona offered, getting up and sitting behind him. She carefully scooped his hair into a low ponytail and started to plait it, tying it up at the end with a red band from her wrist. “There you go.”

Rona patted the top of his head and Skah grumbled pushing her hand away. “Thanks.” So frosty the snowman did know how to show affection.

“You next, Mellissa.” Quidel spiked his eyebrow when Mellissa looked at him with a less than pleased expression. “You wanna take this one, Pria?”

“No way,” I said. I wasn’t dishing out punishment on my best friend, and besides, this was clearly Quidel’s thing. Anything I suggested would probably be considered boring.

“Tell you what, why don’t the boys take one for the girl’s tonight. Mellissa’s new. We don’t want to scare her off.”

“Me too?” Rona asked Quidel, looking eternally relieved.

“Except you,” Quidel said, smiling smugly. “You’re not new.”

“Dick.” Rona threw a thin piece of driftwood at him, hitting him on his shoulder.

“I’m kidding.” He picked up the stick and threw it back at her. “So, Matoskah, that just leaves you.”

“Just get it over with,” said Matoskah. He leaned forward and slung his hands over his knees, sighing impatiently.

Quidel was silent for a minute or two, obviously thinking about what harm he could inflict, when his face lit up. His was the mask of evil through the flames of the fire. Whatever he was thinking was probably just as evil and Matoskah must have thought so too because he groaned under his breath when he saw Quidel’s grin.

“Go back to that same cabin, knock on the door and ask to use their bathroom.”

Matoskah was frowning, and I was having my own
what?
Moment.

“That’s it?” Matoskah didn’t look like he was buying it. It was too easy, and everyone else looked like they had their doubts too.

“Yeah, but without clothes.”

Skah dropped his head to the floor, snickering and swiped his hand down his mouth. “Her dad is gonna kill you.”

“Scared?” Quidel taunted him.

With one dark and adamant look that said he wasn’t about to back down, Matoskah got up and with his back to us all, shrugged out of his jacket. His t-shirt was next, showing us all the smooth contours of his back and then he unzipped his jeans, pulling them off. I looked away when all he was left in was his boxer briefs. Snickering came from Quidel and Skah and I peeked over to see Rona look away awkwardly, too. Although, I’m sure she couldn’t look for different reasons to mine. If I had to guess, I’d say she liked what she saw a little too much.

Matoskah kicked out of his boxers, still with his back to us and I looked up just in time to see his bare butt running off towards the cabin with his hands covering his modesty. Oh my god, these boys were fearless.

“Nice ass,” Mellissa said, smiling at me.

When the girl’s father opened the door and then disappeared, coming back in seconds, face beet red and with a baseball bat in his hands, shouting, I broke down into a fit of giggles. Tears streaked my face and I wiped them away, gasping for a breath.