Fashionably Dead (9 page)

“She’s gorgeous.” Mr. Hottie’s gaze lingered on my mouth as he spoke then snapped up to my eyes. “But that’s neither here nor there. Who made you and what are you?” he demanded.

I was starting to get pissed . . . and careless. “I’m a female,” I told Mr. Hot Pants, “and as far as I know my mommy and daddy made me.”

“Obviously,” he laughed. His eyes raked over my body with appreciation. “But I’m in no mood for games. I’ll ask you again—nicely—one more time. Who made you and what are you?”

I had no idea what they wanted me to say. My pissed-off reaction was shifting to scared-silly. I was so terrified I felt rooted to the ground. How weird was that? I’d heard people say it but I never believed it until now. My feet would not move. I wanted to run, but there was no chance of that. Brownie was by my right shoulder, Red was by my left, and Prince Starting-to-Be-UnCharming was in my face. I knew I was going to die. How unfair was that? I’d already died once this month.
Shit.

He wrapped his large hand around my throat and very calmly stated, “Why don’t I give you a few choices to make this a little easier for you, pretty girl? Are you a Vampyre-Witch, Vampyre-Ghoul, Vampyre-Demon, or Vampyre-Shifter?”

“Ghoul and Shifter are out,” Red threw in. “I would be able to sense that.”

Brownie, not to be out done by the rest of her psycho kin added, “Who sent you and why are you here?” She punctuated it by squeezing my arm so hard I was surprised the bone didn’t snap.

“Oh my God,” I blurted, “you people are nuts.” I started to laugh. Knowing absolutely I was going to die, I still couldn’t help myself. Prince UnCharming dropped his hand from my throat. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was shocked.

“Clearly . . . ” I went on, very noticeably raking Mr. Smarty Pants up and down with my eyes. Turnabout is always fair play and he was hot. If I was going to die I may as well enjoy looking at the eye-candy before he ripped me apart.

“Clearly you are all very good-looking, well dressed Vampyre people who must have escaped from an extremely expensive insane asylum. I don’t know if I like being a Vampyre yet, but if I’m going to end up like you, go ahead and kill me. I want out.” I was definitely heading toward hysteria and entering the land of bizarre cheerleader voice. “You people are batshit crazy. Witches? Ghouls? Demons? Shifters? You forgot Mermaids and Trolls and the Tooth Fairy. I’m just going to leave you to what you were doing. Limb-ripping or whatever. So please step away from me and I’ll go.”

Nobody moved. Much to my chagrin I started laughing again.

“Is she laughing at me?” my ex-boyfriend asked.

“No,” Red interjected, “Us. Did she just say Tooth Fairy?”

“Yes, I believe she did.” He tried to suppress his amusement.

“Does she have any idea who we are?” Red asked.

“I’m going to go with a no on that one,” her brother replied.

Brownie was not happy. “This is not good, not good at all,” she barked. “I think we should kill her.”

“We can’t kill her,” Red snapped. “We don’t know what she is, who she belongs to, or why she’s here. So, if we kill her we could end up banished for centuries. She has not threatened our lives. Trance her, Ethan,” she ordered.

Ethan? His name is Ethan?

“I tried,” Ethan said. “It didn’t work.”

“What do you mean?” Brownie was shocked.

“What I mean, Lelia,” Ethan condescended, “is that she doesn’t trance. She can also clearly see through our cloaking.”

That juicy tidbit set them all off as they yelled at each other about what to do with me. This was absolutely ridiculous. If I was going to die, I may as well go out fighting. What the hell were my choices? I wracked my brain to think of what I could say that would satisfy them enough to let me leave or kill me quickly.

“I’m an Angel-Vamp,” I shouted over their argument. That shut them up, and if I’m not mistaken, scared them.

“Prove it,” Red growled.

“Um . . . ” Well, now I was screwed.

“She can’t prove it, Raquel,” Lelia said. Ethan just stared at me, a slight smile playing on his all too perfect face.

“It’s not that I can’t,” I bluffed, “it’s that I won’t. Since you all seem so interested in what I am, I’d like to know what exactly you are. Besides certifiable,” I added quietly.

Not quietly enough. Red . . .
oops
, I mean Raquel knocked me to the ground with a force that startled me and hurt like hell. I cried out as she straddled me and slapped me hard across the face. I felt my lip split and my cheek start to swell. I struggled but was no match for her. Lelia, formerly Brownie, held my arms down and I could swear both of their eyes were glowing like emerald green flashlights.

“Enough,” shouted Ethan, grabbing the girls like they were rag dolls and flinging them into nearby graves. I struggled to my feet and tried to run, but Ethan held me tight to his chest. God, his chest was amazing. I wondered how it would look and feel without the T-shirt in the way. What in the hell was wrong with me? He was not that hot, plus he wanted to kill me. Well, he
was
that hot, but he was still going to kill me.

I watched in shock as Red and Brownie, or rather Raquel and Lelia stood up and brushed themselves off as if nothing had happened. They should have been decapitated after the way their heads hit those crypts. I was sure I was hallucinating. Raquel grabbed her arm which was grotesquely twisted behind her back and popped it back into place. The huge gash on Lelia’s cheek healed as I watched. They must be old to heal that fast.

“That’s it, Ethan,” Raquel screamed. “You could have knocked my arm off and I don’t have the time or the patience to grow a new one, Asshole.”

Well, there was one question answered.

“So let her go,” she continued, “because now I’m going to kick your ass. It’s about time you knew what it felt like to be legless.”

Lelia laughed and clapped her hands. “I’ll hold the little Angel,” she said, grabbing me from Ethan.

He turned on her quickly and snarled, “If you hurt her, you will be permanently dead. Do you understand me?”

Lelia blanched. I suppose he wanted to kill me himself after he was done ripping his other sister’s legs off. Lelia quickly nodded to Ethan and loosened her vise-like grip on me.

“Bring it,” snapped Raquel.

“As you wish,” he growled.

They began to circle one another like predatory animals. They were both so very beautiful and so very deadly. At least they were off the subject of killing me, but now they were more intent on killing each other. I glanced around the graveyard and wondered if there was any way to escape. This absolutely sucked. I was about to witness some limb-ripping, and then I was going to die . . . for real. Just as they were about to attack each other, something changed in me.

I could feel it in my body. Heat surged through me. I could see everything around me glowing in sparkling golds and peaches. It was wonderful. I smiled and flicked my fingers and a breeze laced with glitter lifted my hair off my neck and hugged my body. Lelia was blown away from me and I was free. I felt strong and beautiful. Plus, I was no longer scared. Part of me knew I’d jumped off the Bridge of Sanity and part of me didn’t care.

My three new friends—I use the term very loosely—stared in awe. Lelia and Raquel huddled together and backed away while Ethan advanced on me, wonder and desire in his eyes. My fangs descended, as did his. Oookay, a little freaky, but strangely hot. Was this the Vampyre sign for “I’d like to get you naked”?

As much as I wanted to see where this would lead, Ethan scared the hell out of me, and still possibly wanted to kill me. I backed away from him and he stopped. His gaze never left mine, and a new kind of heat started searing its way through my body. I knew he could sense what I was feeling because I knew exactly what he was feeling.

God, this Vampyre crap was complicated. Just when I thought I had a handle on my power some new freaky wrinkle got thrown in.

Suddenly I was barraged with images from his head—very naked, very explicit images of what he wanted to do to me. Oh. My. God. He was bad. Really good, but really bad. I’d never done half of that stuff he wanted to do. If his visions were accurate, he was quite something naked. Had I still been capable of blushing, I would have been a deep crimson. He grinned at me and ran his tongue across his lips. The tongue I wanted on my lips, in my mouth, not to mention other places like on my . . . wait . . .
what is wrong with me and when did my inner slut take over?
I swear to God, I wasn’t usually this much of a ho-bag, but all I wanted to do was jump the crazy killer Vampyre and have my way with him. How in the hell was this man making me feel this way without touching me? Why did I feel such a connection to him?

A soft breeze blew up around my body, whipping my hair and lifting my skirt. Ethan’s gaze slipped from my face to my legs. Thank Jesus I had good panties on. Wait . . . Why the hell did I care what kind of panties I had on? Five minutes ago the son of a bitch tried to kill me. Lord have mercy, I’d almost gone commando. That would have been bad.

I lifted my hand and flicked my fingers again and a glittery breeze engulfed me. Ethan began to come towards me again with a very determined look in his eyes. This both excited and scared the bejesus out of me. His intention was clearly carnal as evidenced by the lust in his eyes and the enormous bulge in his jeans. I caught myself moving towards him. While a huge part of me wanted to tackle the gorgeous killer and make him see God, the saner part of me somehow prevailed.

I flicked my fingers three more times, flinging glitter wildly around me. I knew with every fiber of my being that I needed to leave this place
now
or I would not be responsible for what I did. Having sex with a strange killer Vampyre in a graveyard while his sisters watched was just not my usual M.O. no matter how mouthwatering the Vampyre might be. Ethan stopped and tried to reach for me. I stepped back and heard him ask, “What is your name?”

I looked into his beautiful eyes and said nothing. He took a step closer. My body began to tingle with anticipation . . . and then I vanished.

Chapter 8

I woke up in a pile of bodies on my bed. Mine, Gemma’s, Pam’s and The Kev’s. What the fu . . . ?

“Um . . . guys? As much as I love all of you this just seems wrong. Like against the law wrong.”

“Oh my God,” Gemma jerked awake, grabbed my face and started crying. “Astrid, you’re alive!”

“Of course I’m alive . . . at least as alive as a dead person can be,” I said, pushing The Kev off of me. “Why wouldn’t I be alive?”

Pam rolled herself off of my bed. How in the hell did we all fit on my bed? “Well, Assmunch, when you showed up last night you were convulsing in a funnel of Fairy Glitter. You had just transported yourself, which only Angels or Fairies should be able to do, and your eyeballs were rolling back into your head like a rabid dog. Call me nutty, but we were a little concerned.”

“Krumecaca!” The Kev woke up and shouted with great joy. He tackled me in a hug, possibly breaking a rib. “My goodness of the sakes,” he yelled, “we were so worried with the crazy sparkles and the crazy hairdo and your eyeballs rolling around in your head like a wild animal with the rabies and . . . ”

“Thank you,” I cut him off, “enough with the scary Astrid imagery. I get it.”

Pam walked over to my vanity and sat, or rather copped a squat on my little stool. The Kev was pacing. To my horror he was wearing a red, white, and blue Speedo . . . .and nothing else. Bless his heart.

Pam rested her head in her hands. And The Kev, despite his wrong-on-every-level clothing choice, looked gravely serious.

“What?” I was getting uncomfortable. “Why are you acting like somebody died? Oh shit, did I kill someone?”

“Hell no,” Pam bellowed. “Sit your skinny ass down and shut up.”

I obediently walked over to my bed and curled up next to Gemma. She put her arms around me and stroked my hair.

“Did anyone see you disappear?” Pam questioned, wringing her hands.

“Yes.” I hesitated, remembering the effect that the gorgeous Rogue Vampyre had on me. “Three Vampyres.”

“Fuck,” Pam shouted as The Kev’s pace picked up. He ran his hands through his hair and mumbled to himself.

A lead ball sat in the pit of my stomach. My vision blurred as my eyes filled with tears. “What? What did I do?”

“Did you know these Vampyres? Were they from the Cressida House?” she asked.

“No,” I sniffled. “I didn’t know them. I don’t think they were the good kind.” Although . . . one of them
did
have a crazy good ass. What the hell? Talk about inappropriate thoughts. I needed to erase him from my brain. “If I had to guess, I’d say they were the Rogue Vamps I was warned about.” I got up and reached for the phone. “I need to call Venus and tell her.”

“No!” The Kev tackled me to the floor.

“Get. Off. Me.” I ground out, positive he’d cracked a rib. The Kev gently picked me up, sat me on the bed with Gemma and patted my head like a dog. My eyes, now a bright emerald green, bored into Pam’s. “Tell me what in the hell is going on.”

Pam looked up to the heavens for a long moment, then at The Kev, and then finally back at me. “You have powers that Vampyres are not supposed to have. Ever. I am assuming you will need these powers for your path in life, but it would have been a fuckload better if nobody knew about them.”