Fast Forward (12 page)

“Okay, enough exam talk. I need to chill. Y’all want to go to a party tonight? Then y’all can spend the night and we can go to Saturday dance class from here tomorrow.”

“Where?” Diamond asked.

“Yeah, I don’t care. Where?” Jalisa said eagerly.

As usual Jalisa was all for it, but Diamond was the conservative one. She was the one who thought about everything she did before she did it. Jalisa and I were more spontaneous. I guess that’s why we stayed in trouble more than Diamond. So I started telling them about Ursula, Cassie, Sierra and Darien. But I didn’t tell them about the kiss. I still couldn’t believe it myself.

Six hours later, after getting dressed at my place, we started walking down the street to the party. We were talking about Freeman and Hazelhurst as usual. Then Diamond prompted Jalisa to tell me her big news. “What? What?” I said. “Tell me.”

“I’m kind of seeing Isaac,” she said.

“Well, it’s about time. You’ve been dragging that guy’s picture around for what, four years now.”

“Ohh, see, that’s exactly what I said,” Diamond laughed and joked. “See, I told you.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Jalisa said. “I admit it, he’s nice.”

“I know he’s one of LaVon’s boys, and they hang out and all, but you know he’s nothing like LaVon,” I said. We all agreed. “First of all, he’s the only one who actually has a good shot at getting in the NBA, not bonehead LaVon.” We busted out laughing. “I swear I have no idea why I was dealing with the fool.”

“So how’s lawn mower guy?” Diamond asked.

“Absent,” I said.

“What do you mean, absent?”

“He was supposed to be hanging out with me this weekend, but he bailed. He does that a lot lately. I guess it was schoolwork again. But seriously, y’all should have seen those girls checking him out when the limo dropped him off at his dorm on my birthday. It looked like they were ready to rip his clothes off and jump on top of him.”

“You know lawn mower guy is too into you,” Jalisa said.

“Seriously, he actually puts up with your crap,” Diamond joked.

“Hey, Kenisha! Kenisha, you know you wrong.”

We stopped laughing and turned around seeing Li’l T hurrying up behind us. We all groaned at the same time. It never failed. Whenever we were going someplace, Li’l T was always around following right behind us.

“What are you doing out this late?” Diamond asked.

“Shouldn’t your mommy be tucking you in by now?” Jalisa added.

“Y’all think y’all funny. You just lucky I got a sense of humor, and I know that y’all be checkin’ a brotha out when he’s not around.”

“Oh, please,” we all said, then laughed.

“So what’s up with you, girl? You getting all scandalous,” he said to me.

“What are you talking about little boy?” I asked.

“You know what I’m talking about, you and D,” Li’l T said.

“What, who’s D?” Diamond asked.

“I have no idea who he’s talking about,” I said. But I presumed he meant Darien. For once I would love it if Li’l T would keep his mouth shut.

“Oh, come on, girl, acting like you don’t know. I saw you.”

“Saw me what? What are you talking about?” I asked.

“You know you don’t need to be hanging with D. That dude is wrong. He hangs with gang members, and they say he sells drugs.”

“You don’t even know him,” I said, not believing him.

“Everybody knows D. He’s got drama on his back like white on rice. Brotha is always in deep. See, I thought you and TB were hanging? Guess not.”

“Who’s D?” both Jalisa and Diamond asked.

“And who’s TB?” Jalisa added.

“I thought you were hanging with lawn mower guy,” Diamond said.

“What’s a lawn mower guy?” Li’l T asked.

“Oh, please, you don’t even know what you’re talking about Li’l T.”

“I know I saw you getting out his car the other day after you kissed him,” he said.

Jalisa and Diamond looked at me with their mouths wide open. I glared at Li’l T. He was always up in somebody’s business. Sometimes he just needs to keep his mouth shut.

“It’s not what you think you saw, so don’t even try it. He gave me a ride home after school. That’s all. And for your information, I didn’t kiss him, he kissed me. Now if you’re gonna spread rumors, at least get it right.” I turned and started walking. I was pissed, and I was seriously ready to slap him. I hate having all my business out in the street. I wasn’t ready for my girls to know about Darien, but I guess I had to now thanks to big mouth Li’l T.

“Yo-yo-yo. Hey, Kenisha. I was only playing with you, girl,” he said. “Come on, Kenisha. Kenisha!” He called out, but I just kept walking. Diamond and Jalisa started walking behind me.

“Girl, don’t worry about Li’l T. You know he’s just acting stupid like he always do,” Jalisa said.

“Seriously, he just always need something to say. You know how he is,” Diamond added.

They caught up with me as I slowed down. “Fine, we kissed. Terrence doesn’t know ’cause he’s never around anymore. Come on, let’s go in.” We stopped in front of Ursula’s house. I climbed the front steps. The door was open, but I rang the doorbell anyway. Ursula’s mom came
to the door. “Hey, come on in. Just go down the hall. Ursula and Darien are downstairs.”

“Thanks and happy birthday,” I said. We walked to the back of the house and went downstairs. The go-go music, Washington’s twenty-year old homestyle sound, was loud and the place was already packed. There was actually an MC on the mic spinning the eclectic freestyle mix of hip-hop and funk. It was music we’d danced to for years, so we were already loving it. We walked along the packed dance area. It was dark, so I couldn’t see much of anything, but I heard my name called. I turned. It was Ursula.

“Hey girl, I was wondering what happened to you,” she said.

“I’m here. Wait, these are my girls,” I said and turned as Jalisa and Diamond moved closer. “Jalisa and Diamond, this is Ursula.”

They greeted each other and then this guy came up and asked Diamond to dance. It always happened like that. Diamond was too pretty. She had this China doll thing going on. As soon as she walked away, another guy came up and asked Jalisa to dance. When she left, Ursula and I started talking.

“Hey, you look good,” someone said, behind me.

I turned knowing the voice. It was Darien. “Hi,” I said smiling. Damn, he looked good too, but I didn’t say that.

“You want something to drink,” he asked.

“Nah, I’m okay,” I answered. I make it a serious rule never to take a drink from anybody and never to walk away from my drink to dance. People are crazy out here. They spike drinks with date rape drugs, ecstasy, crack,
meth and just plain drugs, just to have fun. I don’t think it’s funny. So anyway, he asked me to dance.

We danced a few times then a slow song came on. Mostly everybody started pairing up, but I saw Diamond and Jalisa on the side talking to Ursula and two other girls I recognized from around the way. I started walking toward them when Darien held my hand and pulled me back. I bumped right into him. He put his arm around my waist and pulled me close. My heart was beating so fast I thought I was going to pass out. All of a sudden it got hot in there.

So we were slow dancing and he moved closer, trying to grind his body against mine. Okay, I dated LaVon, I know when a guy is trying to grind on me. “I’m all sweaty and hot, I gotta sit down,” I said. That’s always my standard back off line. I eased back.

“Come on, baby. Dance with me,” he said, still holding my hand.

“We did just dance, but I’m just tired now, that’s all. It’s hot in here,” I said, then started fanning my face with my fingers. The modest crowd had swelled to full capacity. I could barely move to get back to where my girls were standing.

“A’ight, then why don’t you come outside with me?”

He was smiling, and I was smiling. I was tempted. “A’ight.”

Caution: Merging Drama Ahead

We
went toward the back door. My girls and I called ourselves getting to the party fashionably late, but people were still arriving as Darien and I were walking out. It was obvious the word was out that this was the place to be tonight. I looked back once seeing my girls talking and laughing, so I figured it was okay to go with Darien for awhile. After all, I was just stepping outside to get some fresh air.

He was holding my hand and guiding me through all these people lined along the walls. He’d say a few words to somebody, laugh at something somebody else said in his ear, or just shake hands or bump fists. But all the time we were walking, he never thought about introducing me
to anyone. They all looked at me like they knew something. Wrong. They didn’t know anything. Somebody handed him a can of beer. He took it then kept walking.

As soon as we hit the back door, the smell of stank, sweat, cigarettes and marijuana was thick. It was like cutting through a funk-fog. My stomach lurched, but I kept walking. There was a mild argument then scuffle behind me. I saw people looking back, but I didn’t bother. I just, for real, needed fresh air now and kept on walking.

“Darien, Darien, wait.”

He turned, I did too. Cassie was hurrying outside behind us. I smiled seeing her, but she just looked at me strange like I was totally out of place or something. “Hi, Cassie,” I said.

“Oh, hey,” she said to me then focused her attention on Darien. “Umm, Darien, I need to ask you something,” she said.

“What?” he asked, with attitude.

“Umm, it’s umm,” she began then paused and looked at me. I knew she wanted me to leave, but I wasn’t going anywhere. Besides, Darien was still holding on to my hand. “Umm, never mind. I’ll ask you later.”

He instantly turned and continued walking. I followed.

“What was all that?”

“Who knows? Cassie’s a joke,” he said, dismissively.

“No she’s not, she’s nice. We walk home from school sometimes. I like her.”

“Girl, you don’t even know her,” he affirmed.

I thought about what he said. He was right, I didn’t really know her, but she seemed nice to me, so I guess that
was okay. But then again, my ex-friend Chili seemed okay to me too, and look how all that turned out. Anyway, she was okay with me so, whatever. But I wondered why he would just come right out and diss her like that. “So don’t you think you need to find out what she wants?” I asked.

“I know what she wants, and she’s gonna have to wait.”

I opened my mouth to ask what he was talking about but then changed my mind. So we finally moved away from everybody, got outside and started walking down the alley. I saw his car parked on the street just as the alley stopped. He held his keys, the car beeped and the headlights turned on. I stopped. “Hold up, wait,” I said, stopping. He kept going but stopped when I shook my hand loose from his. “I’m not going for a ride with you.”

“I thought you wanted some air,” he said.

“Hello, this is air, Earth Science 101,” I joked.

“Air conditioning,” he said. “We’re not driving anywhere. I just thought you wanted air conditioning to cool off.”

All right, it was hot, even for the end of October, it was hot. “Fine, but I’m not going anywhere. My girls are still back at the house, and I’m not leaving them.”

He opened the door and we got in. He turned on the engine then the air conditioner. Cool air streamed out of the small vents on the dashboard. He adjusted the center vents to blow directly on me. “Okay, trust me now?” he asked.

I did feel kind of silly. I just settled back and relaxed feeling the cool breeze on my damp body. It felt nice. I watched as he pulled a small vial out of his pocket. “What’s that?” I asked. He tipped a small amount of
white powder onto his baby finger then held it to one nostril and inhaled quickly. He tossed his head back and coughed then he closed his eyes sated. I watched in amazement. I’d never seen anyone get high before.

“You want some?” he asked, finally looking at me.

I shook my head. He had to be kidding. All the things I know about drugs, hell no. “Nah, I’m good,” I said feeling nervous for some reason.

“Come on. Try it. It’ll loosen you up,” he cajoled.

“I’m loose enough,” I said, watching as he repeated the action with his other nostril. I looked away. It was time to get out of there. “I’m ready to go back.”

“Nah, come on. Hang with me.” I heard the sound of a tab being pulled back. He opened the beer and offered me a sip. “Nah, I don’t drink,” I said, “I don’t like the taste of it.”

“You ever try it,” he asked. I shook my head no. “Then how do you know if you don’t like it?”

“I tasted champagne before. My mom used to drink Veuve Clicquot Ponsardin and Opus One all the time.”

“Expensive. You didn’t like them?”

“They were okay, I guess,” I said, acting like I knew what I was talking about. Actually, I took one sip of Opus One and nearly gagged. I started choking and coughing. Afterward I swallowed almost a gallon of water to get the bitter, nasty taste out of my mouth.

“Here, try it,” he offered.

“Nah, that’s okay,” I said.

“You’re scared,” he insisted.

“I’m not scared of anything.” I grabbed his can of beer
and put it to my lips. I held my breath and took a sip then choked and spit it out. It was horrible, worse than the Opus One. I started wiping the beer off the front of me. My shirt was wet and stinking. But before I could say anything more, Darien was all on top of me kissing me. I moved back and pushed him off.

“Aw come on, let’s not play this virgin game. You were swinging with TB and LaVon. I know those brothas. They handle their business.”

“Yeah, but not with me,” I said, then got out. I started walking down the alley back to the party. He caught up with me quickly.

“Kenisha, Kenisha, I’m sorry. Look I’m sorry. I was wrong. I heard that you were a good girl. I just wanted to make sure. There’s all these posers out here trying to mess a brotha up.”

“Whatever, Darien,” I said. I kept walking, but I knew he was talking about Sierra. I got back to the party and headed straight for my girls. As soon as I saw them I was relieved. I was just about to join them, when this guy asked me to dance so I did. I knew Darien was back inside and that he was probably watching me, so I danced. I wanted him to know that his little show didn’t bother me one bit—even though it did.

I was dancing and pushing all up on the guy having fun. He was trying to say something to me, but the music was too loud. I guess he must have smelled the beer ’cause he asked if I wanted another one. I just ignored him like I hadn’t heard what he said. So I was dancing. Then I saw that Diamond, Jalisa and Ursula were dancing, too. We
all started clowning and dancing like we do at Freeman. Ursula was right in there with us.

We were having so much fun playing around like that. After a while, some of the people stopped dancing and were just watching us. We were center stage freestyling. When the songs went off, we broke up laughing and everybody started clapping.

So it was getting late and the birthday party upstairs had long since broken up. It was now just the party in the basement and in the back alley. Ursula went upstairs in the refrigerator and got me, Jalisa and Diamond some bottled water. I told her that I never drink anything already open at parties. So we were standing around talking and drinking water. Darien came up to me.

“Girl, you were tight out there. Where’d you learn to do that?”

“Freeman dance class,” I said, getting my breath back. Between the heat and the heavy dancing, we were all tired and breathing hard.

“That was…” Ursula started, still panting hard. We were probably in better breathing shape than she was. “That was fun.”

“See, you need to get back to dance class,” I told her.

“You used to go to Freeman?” Jalisa asked.

“That’s where I saw you. I knew I recognized you from somewhere,” Diamond added. “Girl, you were good out there.”

“So you gonna introduce me to your girls or what?” Darien asked.

I looked at him like he was crazy. The whole time we
were going outside he never once introduced me to any of his friends—not that I was interested in meeting them anyway. But whatever, so I didn’t have to say anything ’cause Ursula introduced everybody. After that Diamond and Jalisa were back dancing and it was just me Ursula and Darien standing there.

“Hey, Kenisha, I thought that was you.”

I turned around. Leelah, some girl I met last month who went to school with Jade, was there. “Hey,” I said, happy to see her. We talked a bit, and she asked about Jade and Tyrece and his tour. I told her that they were fine. Then we talked more, and she walked away.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, check, you know Tyrece Grant?” he asked.

“More like he knows my sister,” I clarified.

“Where you been D, under a rock?” Ursula joked. “Jade and Tyrece are getting married, and Jade is Kenisha’s sister. Tyrece hung out at her sixteenth birthday party. I heard he did a concert for her and all his friends showed up. Chris Brown, Tyga and Lil’ Wayne was there, too.”

He turned and looked at me different but didn’t say anything. I wish I knew exactly what he was thinking, or maybe not. “Come on, let’s dance,” he said to me.

“Nah, that’s okay. I’m too tired now,” I said sipping my bottle still. I saw Sierra. She must have come late. She was over against the wall hanging with the same girls she was hanging with when we first met, plus Cassie. Sierra was glaring at me. I had no idea why. I guess she thinks that I want Darien. To tell you the truth, I don’t really know what I want. At least he’s around.

The same guy that I was dancing with before asked me to dance again. I said sure and then looked at Darien as I followed the other guy to dance. I could tell he was pissed that I was dancing with somebody else, but I didn’t care.

After a while I was just dancing and having fun with the guy and my girls. I forgot all about Darien and Sierra and their drama. We were just having fun.

Then there was some kind of commotion at the back door. Everybody went back to see what was going on, but nobody who was actually dancing stopped. We just looked around then went back to having fun. When a couple of people came back from checking it out, they told Ursula that it was Darien up to his old tricks fighting again. She looked at me and just rolled her eyes. I laughed. Whatever happening had to happen without us.