Fated Memories (5 page)

“
Oh, John!” she squealed, hugging him close to her. “Thank you!”

“
It’s against my better judgment to allow you to keep this child, providing, of course, Charlotte agrees, knowing you could still lose her. But, I can already see there is no talking you out of it.”

“
We won’t lose her, John. God would never be that cruel.”

Unable to argue further against such strong optimism, John placed a gentle kiss on her pale head before turning away.

“
I’ll go send the wire to Charlotte and Eathen,” he whispered.

“
John,” Martha reached out halting him, “I know I am Jessie’s aunt, and therefore it should be my place to pick out her casket and see to her funeral arrangements, but I just can’t. Would you be a dear and see to everything?”

“
Of course I will.” John shrugged his arms into a black fur-lined overcoat. “I’ll be back soon.”

Standing at the big bay window, Martha watched as her husband disappeared down the back steps of the house on his way to the waiting carriage. His tall, lanky body and natural gait made him appear much younger than his actual fifty-five-years. It took all her strength not to shout her joy aloud.

“
I must be a very sinful person to feel this elated over another’s misfortune.” Martha crossed herself in hopes the Heavenly Father would not look upon her with too much harshness.

“
I can’t help it.” She hugged her body close. “Tia is going to be mine. I just know it.”

Earlier, Jessie’s body had been removed and taken to the funeral parlor, where it would be kept until Charlotte and Eathen arrived. Martha was thankful they didn’t have to keep the girl’s body in their home the entire time or need to see to its preservation. It would be difficult enough to have it returned for the viewing. She had always felt ill-at-ease around death. It made her all too aware of her own mortality.

Chapter Three

Wrapped in an ankle-length coat of light brown tweed with matching hood, her hands encased within the softest leather, Martha stood with John on the South Station platform, tapping one leather-booted foot as she awaited the arrival of Charlotte and Eathen.

“
I knew I should have waited at home and let you meet them, John.” She sniffed, touching a rose-scented handkerchief to her small, up-turned, nose. “Now, I may catch a chill waiting in the cold like this.”

“
In that case, why don’t we wait inside, out of the wind?”

“
No,” Martha shook her head in refusal, “I want Charlotte and Eathen to see us the moment they get off the train. I guess I can tolerate a little inconvenience. After all, Charlotte is my sister. I want them both to know I have their best interest at heart.”

A brief smile pulled at the corners of John’s mouth as he gazed down at her. “I’m sure they already know that, my dear.”

“
I hope they realize the station we hold in this city, and dress in appropriate attire.” Her proud head lifted. “There isn’t any reason they should look like they’ve simply stepped off the farm, just because they have.”

Her haughty gaze slid over her husband’s impeccable taste in clothing, from his fur-lined black coat with the matching fur collar and black hat to his black Italian-leather shoes, and her thick-lashed eyes became hostile.

“
Eathen could buy and sell us, Martha. I’m sure they’ll be fine.”

“
Don’t be crass, John. Eathen Thornton is not above us by any means! At least our money is made through honest endeavors. From all the stories I’ve heard about Eathen, I doubt he could say the same.”

“
Nor would he,” John chuckled.

The loud blast from the train’s whistle announced its long-awaited arrival.

“
Finally!” Martha turned to watch the New York Central as it made its way up the tracks.

The couple inched their way towards the passenger cars, taking care to stay far enough back so as to avoid the sudden bursts of steam shooting out from the sides of the engine and the ever-present soot billowing from the smokestack, as the train braked to a stop.

They watched as, one by one, the passengers left the train. Finally, John pointed. “There’s Charlotte, but I don’t see Eathen.”

“
Oh!” Martha craned her neck to see into the crowd. “I hope he didn’t let her come alone.”

“
It looks as though he did.” John took Martha’s arm, ushering her forward.

As they waited, a petite woman, short in stature and dressed in a long navy-blue wool coat with a lighter colored hat of the same material, stepped off the train to meet them.

“
Charlotte!” Martha waved her gloved-hands in the air. “Oh, my dear!” Martha ran forward to wrap the frail woman in her arms.

“
Martha, it’s good to see you.” Charlotte allowed herself to be hugged and made over. Spying John standing off to one side, she nodded.

“
I’m glad to see you made it all right.” John stepped forward, feeling ill at ease.

“
My dear!” Martha said, releasing the tiny woman. “Where in the world is Eathen? Didn’t he come with you?”

John cleared his throat. “I’m sure Charlotte will tell us everything later, Martha. Right now, we need to get her home where she can rest.”

“
Thank you, John.” Charlotte leaned forward and, standing on her tiptoes, placed a light kiss on the side of his clean-shaven cheek. The scent of his cologne lingered on her face as she released him. “I would appreciate that.”

During the long ride back to the estate, Charlotte remained quiet. The gentle sway of the horse-drawn carriage almost lulled her to sleep. As they pulled up in front of the mansion, Charlotte felt her pulse quicken. In silence, she prayed for the strength she would need to look upon the face of her child. A blast of Arctic air blew inside as soon as John opened the carriage door, its chill hitting her full force. For a crazed moment, she wished for the courage to strip every garment from her small frame and allow the freezing wind to numb her entire being. Instead, she accepted the gloved hand John offered her.

“
Why don’t you two go ahead inside? I’ll help Franklin with the luggage.” John steadied Martha as she stepped from the carriage. He wanted to forestall the sad scene as long as possible.

“
Yes, come along, Charlotte.” Martha wrapped an arm around her sister’s trim waist. Forcing herself to move, Charlotte allowed Martha to guide her up the long walkway leading to the front door.

In her weakened state of mind, Charlotte could feel herself slipping back into the all-too-familiar habit of allowing Martha to dominate the situation. As far back as Charlotte could remember, it had been Martha their parents had listened to and believed when a sibling rivalry occurred. In most cases because Martha was the oldest, but also because Martha had a gift for making people feel guilty if she didn’t get her way.

“
I could just thrash Eathen for letting you go through this alone.” Martha reached up, pushing the heavy hood off her head. “I’ll never forgive him, Charlotte. I mean it! I’ll never forgive him!”

“
Please,” Charlotte whispered, her voice catching on a sob, “could we not talk about this just now?”

“
Oh my dear, I’m so sorry.” Martha stopped, waiting as Charlotte wiped her eyes on a thick handkerchief she drew from her pocketbook. “I didn’t mean to upset you. Now,” she said, as Charlotte seemed in better control of her emotions, “just as soon as we get inside, I’ll let you hold your new granddaughter. That will make you feel better.”

“
Martha, please,” her steps faltered, “I don’t mean to be insensitive, but first I want to see Jessie, while I still have the strength to do so.”

“
Well…of…course. I just thought you would be anxious to see the baby.”

“
I’m very anxious to see her, but you’re going to have to let me do this my way, Martha.”

“
You do everything just the way you want, Charlotte,” John comforted, appearing at her side and placing a gentle hand beneath her elbow. “We’re here to support you.”

“
Thank you, John.” Charlotte gave him a grateful smile. “Again.”

Nodding, he guided the two women the rest of the way inside.

“
Charlotte, I know you want to get this over with as soon as possible, but would you mind indulging me with your company for a few moments? I’d like to relax with a glass of brandy before the fire. I got a little chilled standing out on that platform.”

“
I think a glass of brandy would be very nice right now, John.” Charlotte nodded, as he slipped the weighty coat from her shoulders.

“
Martha,” he reached out as she turned her back to him, waiting for him to unburden her of the thick tweed coat, “would you like to join us?”

“
No thank you.” She pulled the leather gloves from her hands, cramming them into the pockets of her coat before John could move away. “I want to check on the baby first. You two go ahead. I won’t be long.”

Seated before the crackling fire, with the warmth of John’s best brandy beginning to relax her, Charlotte leaned her head back against the soft cushions. Within moments, she fell off to sleep. Taking the empty glass from her hand, John lifted her legs onto the couch and pulled the afghan from off the back to cover her.

***

Later, when Martha walked into the room, she felt surprised to see Charlotte asleep on the couch.

“
Did she already go in to see Jessie?”

“
No. Not yet. I thought she could do with some rest first.”

“
Can you believe the nerve of Eathen, letting her come all the way out here alone, bereaved as she is?”

Motioning her to silence, John walked with her from the room. Closing the door to his den, he turned, as Martha sat down in a chair beside his desk.

“
Martha, don’t pressure Charlotte with questions about Eathen right now. If she wants us to know, she’ll tell us.”

“
John, for goodness sake,” she cried in self-defense, “I wanted to find out why the man is being so insensitive.”

“
Charlotte has enough to handle without us giving her more,” John told her. The no-nonsense tone in his voice warned her against any argument. “We are here to support her, Martha. Not add to her problems.”

***

For a moment, Charlotte couldn’t remember where she was, and then it came to her. Sitting up, she looked around, trying to clear her tired mind. Drawing the beautiful afghan from off her lap, she folded it to lay it aside. Getting to her feet, she smoothed the straying wisps of gray-streaked auburn hair back into the tight braid curled atop her head as best she could. Then, taking a deep breath, she called out, “Martha, where are you?”

At the sound of her sister’s voice calling to her, Martha came into the room. “You’re awake. I hope that little nap made you feel better.”

“
Yes, I think I got my second wind,” she allowed. “Now, I’m ready to see Jessie. Will you show me where she is?”

“
Of course, dear. I’ll stay right by your side.”

“
Thank you, Martha, but I need to do this alone.”

“
Very well.” She turned Charlotte in the direction of the long hallway. “I’ll take you to the room we’ve prepared for her.”

When Martha stopped outside a closed door, Charlotte could feel a strange sensation creep over her. Within moments, she felt light-headed and her legs felt as though they had turned to liquid. She tried to will her trembling hand to open the door.

“
My Jesus Lord,” she covered her mouth with her hand, “please stay close to me.”

Turning the knob, Martha pushed the door ajar, then stood back. “I’ll be right out here if you need me, Charlotte.”

Nodding, Charlotte pushed the door the rest of the way open. The overpowering stench of flowers filled her senses. The sickening aroma made her stomach tighten with distaste. Placing one foot in front of the other, she forced herself to move forward, focusing her attention all the while on the small, elaborate casket placed in the center of the room. So many flowers surrounded the casket only just the top half proved visible. Before she knew it, she stood looking down on the face of her beloved child.

She felt her heart constrict and, for a moment, everything in the room seemed to go out of focus. Taking hold of the casket, her fingers bit into the soft satin lining. The satin felt cool to the touch, and her mind recoiled against the thought of Jessie lying at rest in something so cold. Knowing this to be the one chance she would ever have to tell her daughter goodbye, Charlotte forced herself to take deep breaths until she, at last, felt some calmness return. “Forgive me, Jessie.” The tears she had been unable to shed now streamed unhindered down her face. “We thought we were right by sendin’ you away.” Each word she spoke stabbed like a cruel knife, slashing without mercy into an already open wound. “We couldn’t have been more wrong.”

With a shaking hand, she touched the still face. “I pray you’re safe in the lovin’ arms of Jesus, my Jessie.” She forced herself not to flinch and pull back her hand as she felt the coldness, like icy marble, against her skin. “God knows what heartache you suffered to make you leave us like you did. I trust He won’t hold it against you.” With all the love in a mother’s heart, she patted the face of her child. “You…just…rest… now…, Jessie… and I promise you everything’s gonna be all right.”

She looked down into Jessie’s cold, still face and, without warning, the small face moved. But as Charlotte wiped away her tears, Jessie’s face came back into focus, and she knew it to be the tears of a grieving mother that had led her to see what wasn’t there.