Father's Keeper (9 page)

“I will always protect you, Jennifer.”
He clenched his jaw then and I could tell he was damn near grinding his teeth
with anger. “Even from myself.”

I shook my head no, pulled at his
shirt, buried my face to his neck and tried to breathe. Gil smoothed circles
over my back in a circular motion and my body warmed with his touch. He kissed
my hair, my brow and said, “Focus on just letting all that fear go. Push the tension
away. Take a breath and hold it. Count to four, let your body reboot.”

He tucked my hair behind my ears and
kissed my nose. “Ready? Let’s do it together.”

I nodded, relishing that kiss. Feeling
his warm lips on my face. Gil sucked in a breath and so did I. It felt shallow
and useless. Like I needed air down to my toes and could only get it to my
hips. I wanted to panic but didn’t. I focused on Gil. He flashed his fingers at
me as we held our breath. One, two, three, four and then we exhaled, long deep,
exaggerated exhales that blew all the stale air from our bodies. I wanted to
say no, not to protect me from him but he shook his head no when I opened my
mouth and he said, “Again.”

So we did it again, until my heart
slowed its race and my body stopped tingling and my lips no longer felt numb.
“Don’t protect me from you,” I said with a weak small voice. “I can’t breathe
without you,” I said and my body ached with my own honesty. It scared me
telling that kind of truth.

“Fuck,” he said. And the fear was
back. But when he said it he was studying me. Watching me like I would bloom
before his eyes.

I touched his belt buckle, ran my
finger over the warm flat of his belly and he grabbed my face in his big hands
and pulled me in, kissing me. His tongue hot and eager, his fingers in my hair,
his cock hard under my fingers. “I’m going to hell,” he said.

“If you are then I’ll be with you,” I
said, tugging at his buckle.

He barked out a laugh and stilled my
hand. Still looking torn and worried and protective of me. “Jen.”

“Let me. Please, Gil. Please be with
me. Love me,” I said, more truth opening my soul like  a wound. And now he
could reject me. Hurt me more surely than anyone ever had including my mother.

“I already love you,” he said,
touching my face, stroking my cheek.

“Love me with your body,” I whispered.
My throat so clogged with fear and emotion I could barely swallow.

He shook his head--one short hard
shake--and my heart broke, but then he tugged at my tee and yanked it over my
head. Fingers on the front clasp of my bra, hands on my waist and in a
heartbeat, his mouth closed over my nipple and my body hummed to life. A surge
of joy and need ripped through me, it stole my breath all over again.

I didn’t say anything, I was afraid
to. Afraid that if I spoke, even his name, I’d break the spell and he’s stop.

His belt buckle yielded to my gripping
fingers and I groped at him, both greedy and desperate for the feel of him
under my naked fingers. I grasped his cock and he pressed into me, making my
breath stutter and flutter in my chest. “God, Jen,” is all he said and I
smiled. I gripped him harder and is fingers found my skin, my folds, my pussy
and he sank them into me. One thrust of his warm fingers seated his flesh
within mine and I threw my head back, tears streaming from the outer edges of
my eyes, heart shaking like it would rattle apart in my chest.

“Right there,” I said as some kind of
encouragement. “Right there.” But right there was not enough. For either of us.
And we tussled with each other, wrestling against one another in our efforts to
get closer. It ended with a  pile of clothes by the bedroom door. I laid back
on the big, fancy bed and pulled Gil over me, kissing him with an urgency I
could never explain.

“Last chance,” he said, looking down
into my face. His hands held my wrists flush to the mattress, his strength
making me wetter, making me want him that much more.

“For what?” I asked, moving my hips so
I rubbed against him.

His face warred between need and
regret and I kissed  his forearm, ran my tongue over his wrist where his pulse
beat. 

“To change your mind,” Gil said,
lowering his chest to me so that my breasts mashed to his warm skin. We both
stopped breathing for a moment. I had never been naked in front of him. It felt
both bizarre and natural.

“I don’t want to change my mind.” I
let my legs fall open just a bit more so he could feel the moist heat of me.
Gil shut his eyes, looking tortured and beautiful.

“Me either.”

I gave him one short nod and took him
in hand. I ran the tip of his cock to the wet entrance of me and when he
growled deep in his throat, my pussy clenched up, my heart too, and I moved up
to take him in.

Gil gritted his teeth, surged into me
and thrust deep so I sighed. “I didn’t think--” I stopped myself, shook my
head, my voice lost in a spiral of unshed tears.

Gil moved in me, rocking against me,
his hot skin pressed to my hot skin. His hips slamming my hips, the bones
smacking and my clit singing with the pressure of each thrust. “What? Tell me.”
His teeth found my neck and he gently bit a line of marks, like soldiers lined
up in a row.

“I never thought it would actually
happen.” I tried to move my hands and he held me flat, pinned me flush to the
plum colored duvet.

“Stay still,” he said, pushing his
lips to my collar bone, licking over my salty skin, his breath whispering in my
ear. “You never thought this would happen?”

I shook my head, the first fat drops
of tears slipping from the corners of my eyes as I frantically swallowed to try
and not cry like an idiot. He licked the tears from my cheeks and his cock
filled me, stretching me so that my breath felt too big and my body too small.
“No. Never.”

“But you wanted it to?” His eyes found
mine for a moment and he looked intrigued but puzzled.

“I’ve fantasized about it for years,”
I admitted. I had to force each word over my lips so I could confess to him. He
needed to know.

“You have?” He looked away when I
stared at him and his mouth found my nipple again, kissing and sucking as his
hands left my wrists, found my hips, held me down. Gil fucked me harder and I
wrapped my legs around his lean waist and moved up to meet him, the first swirl
of orgasm dancing in my womb, filling my pelvis with pleasurable heat.

“I have. You haven’t?”

He didn’t answer me. He buried his
face to my shoulder and his thrusts grew more eager, more frantic. I held his
waist because he’d let my hands free. My fingertips danced along his soft skin
and I held him close until my patience shattered and my pussy grew tighter and
before I came I wanted to know. I made him look at me. I kissed him. I said,
“Gil, did you? Ever?”

He nodded once, a fierce almost angry
nod and then he was coming, his admission pushing him past the edge and he bit
my breast, right above the nipple and that was enough to push me straight into
my own release so that I was falling with him. A perfect downward spiral of
bliss.

Chapter
11

I woke when I heard the basement door
and felt Gil stiffen behind me. His arm tightened around my waist like he was
protecting me and I realized I was hearing Carl come in. Carl who had fucked
Tammy. Carl who was going to get his ass kicked if he ran into Gil. Gil sat up
as if to go and I pulled his arm gently.

“Don’t, please,” I said softly. I
could see his profile from the stark street light coming through the window.

“Jen--”

“Please, Gil. I’ll just stay here.
Stay here with me. Maybe he’s just come to get his stuff. It’s only fair that
we let him.” I touched his arm again, running the tip of my finger along the
bulge of his muscle.

I watched him clench his jaw and war
with himself. Let Carl sneak out like a coward or go kick his ass for fucking
me over. I leaned up and kissed his bicep, his shoulder. “Jen,” he said again.

“Come on. Stay with me.” I put my hand
in his lap and felt the bulge of his hard-on under my hand. Gil kissed me, his
hands in my hair. He pushed me back and kissed me harder.

“On one condition,” he said. His
fingers found their way between my legs and he slipped one in me, then another.

“What’s that condition?” I gasped,
moving up under him, parting my legs so he could feel my urge to be with him
again.

He didn’t answer me, just grunted,
moving himself between my legs, slipping the head of his cock to my pussy.
Gil’s lips crushed down on mine and his tongue was hot and sweet on mine. He
slipped into me with no effort at all, I was that ready for him. The head of
his cock hitting my G-spot when I bowed up under him to get him deeper.

“He’ll come and he’ll go and we’ll be
in here together,” I said, touching his face, his lips. He nipped at me and I
yelped softly, his cock driving deeper, his fingers biting into me.

“That fucker doesn’t get to
come
,”
Gil said in my ear.

It was on the tip of my tongue to
remind him that I had been going down on him while Carl had been fucking Tammy,
but he tilted my ass up just enough that the tip of him tripped the bundle of
nerves deep in my cunt and I came, pushing my teeth to his shoulder, muffling
my own cries of pleasure. “Yes, Gil,” I said instead.

He grunted again, pulling out and for
an instant my heart broke and I thought he was getting up to leave. Instead he
turned me onto my belly and hiked me up on my knees by my hips. “Spread your
legs,” he growled and I opened myself to him. “Put your head down, Jen,” he
said and one hand pinned me at the small of my back, one hand pinned my head,
pushing it low so my ass stuck up and I was bowed at his mercy.

I wondered wildly a racing thrill
shooting through me. Had he fucked my mother like this? Did I look different or
the same? How different did we feel? Was I better? And god, had he ever thought
of me this way under him before tonight? Had he had these thoughts for years
and years the way I had--I wasn’t brave enough to ask.

Gil’s hand pushed me hard and I shook
under him, pushing back to take his cock. I balanced on my forehead and his
fingers caught and tangled in my bed head wild hair. His fingertips blanched my
skin and I sighed when he said, “Touch yourself for daddy.”

The word made my whole body tremble.
Daddy had been a joke between us. I’d called him dad but never daddy. Not
seriously, anyway. I had called him that tongue in cheek and he’d called
himself that in the same manner. So when he said it, my nipples peaked and my
stomach tingled and I reached under myself, tickling my clit with my fingertip.
Not touching too hard because he had me so worked up that if I did, I’d come.
And I didn’t want to come just yet.

“Yes, daddy,” I said, and smiled. My
face pressed to the mattress and him ramming into me so I scooted forward
millimeter by millimeter. I heard soft furtive sounds in the house and wondered
if it was just Carl getting his stuff or if Carl was eavesdropping on us.

The cruel and twisted part of me hoped
he was.

“Good, good, girl. I’m going to come
soon,” he said, his voice so soft it was just another fragile furtive sound in
the house. I had to struggle just to hear him in the silent home. “And I want
you to come with me. Will you come with me, pretty girl? I’m going to come
because of this sweet pussy,” he said and I felt my skin erupt in goose bumps.
I was nodding and then realized that he couldn’t see me.

I said “I will. I will come with you.”

“Sweet, sweet pussy,” he said again.
He moved his hand from my head and pushed a finger into my ass. A slow, subtle
stinging pinch that lit my lower half with a the sparkle and bite of pain. But
his cock slammed into me harder, nudging and pushing the plump folds of my cunt
and his finger only amped up that pleasure with a hint of pain.

“Oh, Gil,” I said, my face pressed to
the bed.

“Who?” His finger slipped in and out
of my back hole, his cock in and out of my cunt and his voice was a raspy kiss
in the dark.

“Daddy,” I said.

“Oh, daddy, that’s good.”

He stilled, thrust hard, grunting
lowly and squeezing my flesh so hard I saw stars in the dark. “Come on then,”
he sighed.

When he came, I came with him, my
fingers flying on my clit, the word
daddy
on my lips.

He curled me into him, whispered in my
hair. “It was so, so hard for me to see you with him that first night. But I
couldn’t look away.”

A jolt of excitement and surprised
fire off inside of me even though I was half asleep. He had been there. I
hadn’t been imagining it.

* * * *

I heard a bang out in the house. I
heard a shuffle and a drag and a grunt. I knew it was Carl leaving. Probably
drunk. Carl tended to do things he did not think he could be forgiven for and
then drink himself into a stupor. I had surprised him for nearly a year by
forgiving him anyway. Now I would simply let him go. Carl was free. I didn‘t
wish him ill, but I was done with him. I was pretty sure he was done with me,
too. And that was fine by me.