FEARLESS: The King Series, Book One (5 page)

I don’t think too much happened in class that afternoon, but I really couldn’t swear to it. I was completely and totally in another world. Mr. Frame lectured on something that happened in the early nineteenth century, and the Trig teacher spent the whole class period wrapped up in a concept I could not even begin to comprehend. All I knew for sure was that they left me alone to think.

When I wasn’t with Michael, I could think rationally, and I could plan carefully. I knew that it was absolutely ludicrous to believe that this person I had known for barely two days could be so important to me already, and it was even more impossible that
I
could mean anything to him. I thought about each time we’d been together… but I couldn’t remember them in too much detail or I lost any of that rationality.

I came down to one conclusion: it didn’t make any sense. Michael had so far offered no explanation for why he was spending this much time and energy on me. If I had a suspicious mind—which I did—I might worry that it was my unique talent that drew him to me, but if I was looking at things logically, I had to admit that he had sought me out before he knew about my ability. So it was pretty far-fetched that he liked me for my freakish mind.

Far more frightening was considering my own reaction to him. I couldn’t look into his eyes for any length of time without losing all sense of reality. Each time he smiled at me, my insides begin to melt away. My whole being hummed with gladness when I knew I was going to be with him, and I felt every sense sharpen when we were together.

This was so new to me. In the past, I had found boys attractive. I could look objectively at a cute guy and admire him. I had even had a few small crushes on classmates—crushes that never had amounted to anything more than me sighing to myself when that boy passed me in the hall or fleetingly caught my eye. I never pursued those feelings, because they weren’t that important.

This situation was so radically different that I couldn’t even compare it. I wondered, though, what would have happened if Michael had never made a move to talk with me. What if I had just seen him in the cafeteria on the first day and that had been the end of it? Would I still be hung up on him? Or was it that he
had
reached out to me, had made it a point to talk to me, that made him so attractive?

At the end of two class periods, I didn’t have the answers. I knew that Michael was already more important to me than anyone except my parents. I knew that I trusted him.  Beyond that, I was going to have to do something I rarely did: wing it.

I hurried to my locker after the final bell, anxious and ready to go. Michael was already there, leaning against the wall… He smiled as I rushed up with my books falling out of my hands.

“How was your afternoon?” he asked, as he watched me open the locker and juggle books.

I stepped back and spread my arms. “Well, I’m dry, so that’s one good thing. It was pretty uneventful. How about yours? And how did you get here so fast?”

“Mine was boring. English and Botany. And I got out a little early because we had a quiz in Botany, and I finished early. No more Nell issues?”

He had changed the subject so quickly I had to pause to think before answering. “No. She’s in my History class, but she pointedly ignored me.” I slammed the locker shut and turned to face Michael fully. “What’s her deal, anyway? I mean, I get that she’s the queen diva around here. I saw that right away. But usually those types don’t bother with anyone who doesn’t threaten them.”

Michael’s eyes were speculative. “Maybe you threaten her.”

I laughed. “Oh, that’s possible. No, I don’t think that’s the issue.”

“I’ve known her for as long as we’ve been in school. She’s always been someone you don’t want to mess with. Some of the guys can deal with her, but most of the girls steer clear, unless she chooses them to be in her little group.”

I laughed. “I don’t think that’s a concern of mine. I’ll be happy to be among the steering-clear crowd, if she leaves me alone.”

Michael smiled, too, ruefully. He glanced at his watch.  “Are you all set?”

I nodded. “Ready to experience the wonder of your amazing cool car.”

He rolled his eyes. “She doesn’t appreciate sarcasm. Remember, she’s my best girl, so you’ll want to make a good impression.”

I giggled as we started toward the parking lot. Michael glanced sideways at me. “Assuming you do make the cut, do you think your mom would let me give you a ride to school? I drive in every day, and I could stop to pick you up… if you wanted.”

I did want, more than I could even express. And since my parents had—no matter how grudgingly—given their consent to rides
from
school, I decided that being driven
to
school couldn’t really be that different.

“Yeah, I think that would be fine,” I answered finally.  Michael’s smile was nearly as staggering as the explosion of feeling that poured out toward me. I concentrated on keeping my steps steady.

We reached his car, and Michael opened the passenger door for me. I swung my backpack into the rear and sank into my seat as he sprinted around to his side.

I examined the interior carefully. “I like your car. It’s in very good shape for such an old… vehicle.”

Michael shook his head in mock despair. “It’s not old, it’s antique. And it’s been lovingly maintained. This car has been in my family since it was brand-new. That’s very unusual.”

“Really? I don’t know very much about cars.” I ran a finger over the chrome detail on the dashboard. “I mean, I can drive, and I do, but not that often. My mom usually needs the car during the day.”

Michael snuck a glance at me as he turned the key in the ignition. “Do you want to drive my car some time?”

Taken aback, I scrutinized his face to gauge his seriousness. “Are you kidding? You’d let me drive your antique?”

He laughed. “It’s a car, Tas. Yes, I am pretty fond of it.  It was my uncle’s, then my dad’s, then my sister’s and now it’s mine. And I’d love for you to take it for a spin, if it would make you happy.”

Now I was more than surprised, I was touched. “Thank you,” I murmured. “I’d really like that.”

He grinned. “Of course, I should probably warn you…  once you drive the ‘Stang, you’ll be spoiled for anything else.”

“I guess I’ll take my chances.” The car was meticulously maintained, and only a little bit of wear indicated its age. I looked at the vintage radio, the huge steering wheel… and the stick shift. Grimacing, I shook my head.

“Your car. It’s manual. I mean, stick shift.”

Michael turned in his seat, looking through the rear window as he began to back out. “Yup, it is.” He put his hand on my headrest as he did, and his wrist was nearly touching my face. I couldn’t breathe. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, just absorbing his closeness.

“You okay?” I heard the quizzical concern.

“Yes.” I opened my eyes but didn’t move my head. “But I can’t drive your car. I never learned how to drive manual.”

Michael moved his hand to the gearshift and the car slid forward smoothly. “Seriously?” I shook my head. “Well, when we have time, I’ll teach you to drive stick, so I can keep my promise, okay?”

The idea that he was making plans with me—even as incidental as a driving lesson—made me glow all the more. I closed my eyes again; with my head swimming, my blocks were worthless, and I could hear him so clearly.

… Pushing? Am I coming on too strong? Moving too fast… She makes me feel—I can’t even think about how she makes me feel… like I could conquer the world when she’s with me… but what if she doesn’t want me around?

I opened my eyes abruptly and sat up. Michael glanced over at me. “You okay? I thought you had fallen asleep. Which would have made it hard to get you home, since I have no idea where you live.”

I looked out the window as we drove through town.  “No, just thinking.” I gave him the general location of my house and then gathered up my all my courage and continued, feeling my face heat as I did. “A driving lesson would be great. And I wasn’t trying to listen to you
…
but you’re not being pushy. And—” I took a deep breath, “—And I never don’t want you around me.”

Michael’s face was a study in confusion. I didn’t blame him. I usually spoke clearly, but for some reason, it was easier just now to say what I didn’t want—his absence—than it was to say what I did want—or need: his presence.

“So if you don’t not want me around, is that the same thing as wanting me around?”

I knew my face had to be flaming. “Yes, I guess that’s what it means,” I whispered, my eyes fastened on the road.

We were turning onto my street, where I was certain my mother was waiting by the front door, making sure I hadn’t come to any harm. Michael slowed the car and pulled up just out of sight of the house. Turning in his seat, he put a finger beneath my chin to raise my face, forcing me to look into his eyes.

What I saw there was steady and bright. He was smiling that wonderful smile, and when he spoke, his voice was low.

“I don’t not want you around either,” he said. “And I know we haven’t had the time or privacy to talk this through, but just so you don’t worry—this is not the norm for me. I don’t give girls the rush. I’ve dated a little—taken girls to dances and the movies with a group of friends—but I’ve never had anything like—you—happen to me.”

I was already shaking my head. “Me neither.”

He looked at me a minute more, and his finger moved from my chin to the side of my face, stroking lightly just along my hairline. He didn’t say anything, and I was able to keep whatever he was thinking from reaching me.

At last, regretfully, he dropped his hand and coasted the car to the front of my house. Before I could even turn, he had jumped out and come around to open my door for me, helping me get out my bag, too.

I could feel my mom was lurking beyond the front door, but I couldn’t go in without bringing up what I’d expected Michael to ask since we’d met at my locker.

“You didn’t mention—what happened at lunch.” It was a statement, but Michael answered the question he heard behind my words.

“I know. Car ride wasn’t long enough. I was thinking—I’m working tomorrow, but would you be able to hang out after school on Thursday? We could go out to Lancer Park and just
…
talk.”

I wasn’t sure I could endure two more days without clearing the air, but I nodded. “I think I can. I’ll have to ask my mom. Is the park in town?”

“Just outside. Would it be better if I asked your mom?”              “No!” I was quick to answer. If my mom sensed that Michael knew that I could hear minds
…
well, I wasn’t sure what would happen, but it wouldn’t be good. “Thanks. My parents can be a little overprotective. Part of my whole. . deal.” I made a face, but Michael only smiled.

“Okay. I’ll leave it to you then. I’ll be here tomorrow at seven-thirty to pick you up, all right?”

I smiled back at him. “I’ll see you then.”

Getting permission from my parents to go to Lancer Park with Michael wasn’t as difficult as I had anticipated. There was the expected flare of surprise and the same predictions of disaster if I slipped up and revealed my ability. I was able to avoid out and out lying, since they didn’t ask me if Michael already knew about it. Eventually, they acquiesced, with lots of warnings to be careful, to keep up my blocks and my guard.

I was waiting by the door the next morning when the powder blue Mustang slid down the street at a safe and respectful speed and pulled up in front of our house.

“Mom! I’ll see you after school!” I called. My heart was pounding. I grabbed my bag and concentrated on walking calmly and coolly out the door.

Michael was out of the car and opening the door for me. I noticed, for the first time, how he was dressed. It seemed before I had never looked away from his eyes. Today he was wearing faded but decent looking jeans and a gray t-shirt. He smiled as I approached.

“Good morning, “ he greeted me, and I shivered at his voice. What was it, I asked myself, that made me feel this way? All I had to do was see him and I felt swoonish, if that was even a word.

“Good morning,” I answered. “Looks like it’s going to be a pretty day.”

Michael glanced at the sky through the windshield as he climbed into the driver’s seat. He smirked at me. “Yep, it’s Florida. Pretty days are the rule, more often than not.”

I cringed inwardly. What a trite, stupid thing to say, talking about the weather of all things!

But Michael didn’t seem to notice my embarrassment. “Guess it’s a lot more of a sure thing here than it was in Wisconsin.”

I was surprised that he remembered the last place I had lived. “That’s not saying much, but yeah, it is.”

We were both quiet, then I ventured, “I really do appreciate the ride. You’re possibly saving me from a horrible fate, if I had to walk.”

Michael laughed easily as he turned a corner. “Oh, yeah? What’s that? Blisters?”

“No!” I answered, my eyes widening. “You know, all the wildlife danger. Scorpions, snakes and alligators! Oh, and those biting ants, too.”

This time he laughed in earnest. “You’re not serious, are you?”

“Of course I am. My dad told me all about everything that lives down here. He said not to go near natural bodies of water, and I’d have to walk past a lake on my way to school.”

Michael shook his head, looking at me sideways in mock pity. “Sad. Do you really think there’s gators just roaming the streets?”

“There might be,” I replied darkly. “Who knows?”

He was still chuckling as we turned into the parking lot and found a spot. We climbed out of the car, Michael waiting as I slung my backpack over my shoulder.

“So, are we on for tomorrow afternoon?” he asked. I could tell he was trying to keep his tone casual.

“Yes! My parents said it was okay, as long as I was home by dinner and…” I altered my voice to mimic a parental tone, “be very careful and smart.”

Michael shot me a quizzical glance. “What does that mean?”

“It means my parents don’t want anyone to find out about what I—what I can do.” I kept my voice down. There weren’t many people near us, but I’d been well schooled in caution.

“It’s a secret, then?”

We had reached Michael’s locker, and we stopped there while he swapped books. I raised my eyebrows.

“Well, yes. No one knows. Just my parents and me…  and now you. And they can’t know that
you
know, or they will really freak out, and probably send me away to military school.”

Michael slammed his locker shut. “Seriously?”

I shrugged. “No, it wouldn’t be military school. Probably we’d just move out of state and they’d home school me for the rest of my life.”

“No, I mean, no one else knows? And they’d be mad if they knew I knew?”

I shuddered. “Mad doesn’t begin to cover it. Mostly they’d be frightened, I think. Their worst fear is that someone finds out about me and then… I don’t know, they have all kinds of dark scenarios in mind.”

“Hmm.” We moved down the walkway toward my locker, and it was my turn to root through my books. Michael leaned against the wall, and I could feel his eyes on me before he spoke again. “So do you think you can keep yourself dry and out of trouble this morning?”

I rolled my eyes. “That doesn’t seem to be asking too much, does it? Sometimes I think I’m missing some essential element I need to be part of things. I’m always the invisible girl… unless I’m in Chemistry here, then I’m the girl with the target on her.”

“I don’t think it’s you. We get a certain amount of transient kids in King… you know, they move here for a year, then they’re gone. I guess it does take a while before people really open up.” He shrugged. “Like I said the other day, I’ve been in this area, at King schools, all my life. So I don’t know for sure.”

“Small towns are always harder to break into,” I agreed. “I thought Florida would be different,
because
there are always people moving in and out, and all the tourists, too.”

“King is a little bit of an oddity, though,” Michael remarked. “There are a few old Florida families, and sometimes they act like they’re royalty. Not all of them, but there are some odd ones.”

“King has been here a long time?” I questioned as I closed my locker.

“Haven’t you heard the history of this town?” Michael asked. “It’s kind of cool, I guess, if you’re into that sort of thing.”

“What sort of thing?”

“Oh, you know, history, magic, legends, all that paranormal stuff.”

My spine tingled. “Some people would say I am very into paranormal stuff,” I murmured softly, just for Michael’s ears.

He smiled gently. “Not like this. Gravis King was a carnie. Actually, he owned a big carnival, one of the largest in the south in the late nineteenth century. He retired down here, bought land, and brought his whole carnie family down to live here, established this town. Said they all needed a place to make a fresh start.

“Lots of people who still live in town can trace their family trees back to King’s carnies. If you go downtown and walk around, you’ll see shops with some of the carnie names up there. People trying to play on their heritage, I guess. Makes a good draw for tourists, and we get busloads every year. Whatever works.” He shrugged.

“That’s very interesting,” I mused. “Is yours one of the families?”

“No way!” he laughed. “My parents settled here as a compromise. My dad came from the panhandle, my mom came from south Florida, so they agreed to live here as a half-way point. And they’re not much on the mystical elements people in town play up. My mom says it gives her the creeps. So we don’t live in the town, we live just outside, like I told you.”

The first bell rang, and I looked up, startled. I had been totally absorbed in our conversation.

“Gotta run,” Michael sighed, regretfully. “See you at lunch.  Stay dry!”

It was hard to believe it was only my third day at King High School. I managed to keep it relatively uneventful. In Chemistry, I slid into my assigned seat as quietly as I could, but I needn’t have bothered. Liza, Casey and Nell were all in full ignoring mode, not even bothering to acknowledge my presence. I was perfectly okay with that. I took notes on Ms. Lacusta’s lecture and kept my eyes on my notebook.

When the bell rang, Ms. Lacusta called me to her desk and handed me several papers stapled together.

“These are the notes from the lab you missed,” she explained. “And there is a summary worksheet on the back page. If you complete it tonight, I will make sure you receive full credit for the lab you missed.” Her eyes were very perceptive as she gazed at me. “I don’t believe that you were at fault yesterday. I should have kept a closer eye on the situation, especially considering the… personalities involved.”

I wasn’t sure what I should say at this point, so I just nodded and murmured my thanks. As I turned to go, Ms. Lacusta said softly, “Tasmyn… tread carefully. And please, do feel free to let me know if there is anything I can do to help you feel more settled and at home here. I think I could be very helpful to you.”

Her words were kind enough, but quite suddenly, I sensed a very different feeling pulsing from her mind. It swirled around me, almost like a tangible mist, and it was not pleasant. Rather, it was cunning and nearly—I struggled for the word—painful? No, not quite. Dangerous, that was a more accurate description. Like a beautiful snake that might lull its victim into admiration before it struck with deadly venom.

I took an involuntary step back from the desk and nearly stumbled. I mumbled another incoherent word of thanks and fled the room as quickly as I could. I spent most of Speech and Debate trying to shake off the sense of foreboding Ms. Lacusta had triggered in me.

In English, I returned Amber’s notebook to her with another word of thanks. Again, she didn’t respond to my efforts to start a conversation; she just took the notebook back with a nod and never even met my eyes. I stifled a sigh, wondering what I could have possibly done to offend yet another girl by my third day of school.

The rest of the morning passed quickly, and I was so glad to go to lunch that I felt like skipping the whole way. Michael was waiting for me in the same spot outside the door, and his smile upon sighting me lit his entire face.

The idea that I was the reason for that incredible smile was intoxicating. I really couldn’t understand why he sought me out, why he wanted to be with me, but I wasn’t going to press my luck and ask too many questions, lest he figure out that I wasn’t worth the effort. I was surprised and not a little scared to realize that Michael Sawyer was already so important to me.

As he had the day before, Michael opened the door and followed me inside. But today, he was taking a personal interest in my lunch. He added a plate of fries to my tray (which held a cup of soup and a salad) and made me take two cookies instead of just one. When I protested, he just shook his head and moved me forward.

“You cannot make it through an afternoon on just rabbit food and soup,” he told me firmly. “Besides, I’ll help you eat them.”

Everyone at our lunch table greeted me warmly as we sat down. I tried to keep up with the conversation that flew around us… If I kept my concentration on just one person at a time, I was able to tune out most of the thoughts. Fortunately, the few I did pick up were positive and friendly.

Michael made sure that I kept eating throughout the talk.  He sat next to me today instead of across the table, and he angled his body so that I felt protected and safe, even as he encouraged me to talk to the others. I realized that he was giving me another gift: he was sharing his friends with me.

It was toward the end of lunch that Anne mentioned Nell Massler’s name. She rolled her eyes as she told us that Nell had joined the Harvest Moon Dance Committee. Across the table, Brea sighed in a show of empathy.

“I just don’t get it. She’s very popular, but she is
so
intense. We were having a meeting, and she gets all wrapped up about the dumbest things. I can’t believe how many people are listening to her. Drives me crazy!”

I was quiet. I had just met these girls, and I didn’t want to chime in on something negative.

Michael moved slightly closer to me and leaned to whisper in my ear. “Why don’t we beat the rush and go to our lockers now, if you’re finished eating?” He glanced down at my tray and sighed. “You didn’t finish your cookie.”

“I’m full,” I answered. “I’m ready to go.”

Once out in the hallway, Michael walked alongside me in silence. “I thought maybe the Nell talk was making you uncomfortable.”

I glanced at him sideways. “Are you sure you aren’t the mind reader here?”

He looked at me in surprise. “Pretty sure. I just try to be observant.” We stopped at his locker first, and as he twirled the combination, he said quietly, “You talk about it so casually. But I thought—what you can do was a big secret.”

“It is. I mean, it always has been. I don’t—” I struggled to put what I was feeling into words. “I’ve never been able to say those casual things to anyone but my parents. I guess it’s just really freeing. I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“No, it doesn’t.” Michael closed the locker. “I was just surprised.” He stood looking down at me so intently that I flushed and dropped my eyes. “There were some times at lunch that you seemed to be listening really hard. You were just looking at Anne and Brea—I don’t know, like you were concentrating intensely on what they were saying.” He hesitated, and I sensed that he didn’t want to say anything I might take the wrong way. “Were you… were you
listening
to them? You know, to more than what they were saying out loud?”

My face grew even warmer. “No! I don’t do that, not on purpose. Sometimes things slip in…” I was getting upset as I tried to explain. “What I was concentrating on so carefully was
not
listening. I work very hard to keep up the walls that block other people’s thoughts.”

Michael closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall. “I didn’t mean that to sound—accusing. I was just wondering. I’ve been worrying about what you might be reading in my mind, that you might not like it. I didn’t even think that you might be trying not to know.”