Fearless (The Story of Samantha Smith #1) (44 page)

“You can borrow my car after you have your breakfast,” my mom said. “Your dad can take me to work.”

My dad, who still read the newspaper, peeked over the business section, raising his eyebrows. “I can?”

“Yes, Bill. It’s only a few minutes out of your way. Your daughter needs a car.”

Dad submerged beneath the newspaper, grumbling.

“Eat while it’s hot,” Mom said. She served up plates full of steaming food for everybody.

Christos chewed on french toast. “Wow, Mrs. Smith. Great french toast. So fluffy.”

My mom smiled. “It’s the bread. I get it at a local bakery.”

“Well, it’s awesome. I love it.”

“Thank you, Christos.” She sipped her coffee.

When we finished eating, I cleared the table. “Thanks for breakfast, Mom.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Smith,” Christos said. “Everything was wonderful.”
 

After my parents left for work, Christos and I took turns showering.

When Christos and I were dressed, I dug an old backpack out of the back of my closet, put it in the trunk of my mom’s Honda, then we hopped inside.
 

My parents drove the identical model of Honda sedan. The only difference was that my dad’s was silver, because he said it reflected heat better in the summer. My mom’s was black because she thought it was more stylish. They were way too extreme for their own good. Not.

Inside the car, I cranked the heater up full-blast for Christos.

“Thanks,” Christos said.

The roads were somewhat icy, but I was used to it. I drove us through neighborhood streets for awhile, knowing exactly where I was going. Eventually, we rolled to a stop on a residential street in nearby Maryland.

Christos looked around. “Aren’t we going shopping for clothes?”

I turned off the car. “Christos, I need to tell you something.”

“Okay.”
 

I unbuckled my seatbelt. This was going to take awhile. “First of all, thank you for coming out with me.”

“It was my pleasure. I couldn’t think of a better way to spend winter break. Or a better person to spend it with.” He reached over and cupped my chin. “I missed you so much,
agápi mou.
”

I reached up with both hands and pressed his hand against my cheek. I feared he wouldn’t miss me ever again after I finished telling him about Taylor. I was pretty sure I’d be driving him to the airport, not to CVS for a new toothbrush.
 

“I’m not who you think I am, Christos.”

“What do you mean?”

“I have a bit of a history.”

“Oh? Are you a dude?” He grinned. “I mean, I should know better, based on what I’ve seen so far, but I hear those sex change operations have gotten really good.”

“No, Christos.” I frowned. “This is serious. I’ve been holding back on you big time. And I feel terrible.”

“Samantha, whatever it is, I’m sure it’s not as bad as you’re making it sound.”

I glanced out the front window of the Honda, to the simple two bedroom house across the street.
 

A mother and her daughter had walked outside and stood on the porch. The daughter was two years older than me. Her mother locked the front door, then the two of them made their way carefully down the short brick pathway.
 

The daughter limped noticeably. Her mother helped her down the two steps at the end of the path. Such a simple thing, walking down two steps. But the young woman couldn’t do it confidently without help. They climbed into an older, rust-spotted minivan parked on the street.

“See that girl across the street?” I said.

“The one getting into the minivan?” Christos asked.

“Yeah. That’s Taylor. Taylor Lamberth.”

Recognition lit Christos’ face. “
The
Taylor? The name you kept muttering in your sleep?”

“Yes. She didn’t used to limp like that. Before I ruined her life.”

I was pretty sure all the air in the car was sucked into Christos’s lungs when he inhaled sharply.

Christos frowned. Then his frown turned to a doubtful smirk. “What do you mean, ruined?”

This was not going to be easy. At least the sun was up. For whatever reason, I didn’t want to tell this story in the darkness. I didn’t think I could do it. Because that’s when it happened.

“Let me begin at the beginning. Remember I told you about Damian? The night we were supposed to have sex for the first time, but didn’t?”

“Yeah?”

“I didn’t tell you the whole story.”

Chapter 24

THREE YEARS EARLIER…

Near Damian Wolfram’s home.

The road leading away from Damian’s parents’ secluded mansion was long, windy and isolated. Except for the white headlights of Damian’s BMW, it was pitch black. There were no street lights of any kind this far from the city. Dark woods and fields surrounded us.

Damian drove recklessly, taking the turns way too fast.

“Slow down, Damian! You’re going to get us killed!” My voice was surprisingly calm, considering how angry and hurt and sad I was after Damian had destroyed what should’ve been an intimate evening.
 

“I just want to get you home, Sam,” he seethed. “Like you asked, Sam. So if I’m driving too fast, Sam, I’m just giving you what the fuck you wanted, Sam. I’m taking you the fuck home. Sam.”

He was in full-pout mode. I hated how he kept saying my name, but I wasn’t going to ask him to stop, and risk triggering greater wrath.
 

A few minutes later, we rounded a tight turn and the car drifted into the oncoming lane. Luckily, there was no one else on the road this late. “Damian, you’re scaring me. Please slow down.”

“Calm down? Why the fuck do you think I’m so angry, Sam? Huh? Do you want to guess? Sam? I’ll bet you know the answer.”

I wasn’t going to play into his tirade.

“Come on, Sam. Guess. I bet you’ll get it in one try.” He eyed me and his lips peeled back over his teeth. In the glow of the dashboard lights, he looked like a monster. “Not gonna play? Oh that’s right. You don’t play, do you? Because you’re a fucking tease. Six months?” He scoffed. “Six fucking months. What were you waiting for? A fucking ring? Jesus Christ, Sam, how long does a guy have to wait until you give it up?”

I had done my best to stay calm, but he was prodding me so hard, I couldn’t help myself. “I don’t know,
Damian
. Maybe if you actually loved me, I would’ve gone through with it,” I sneered.

“Love you? Fuck, fine. I love you, Sam. Now can we go fuck?”

“You don’t know anything about love, Damian.” I turned to stare out the window. There was no point in continuing the conversation any further. He was clueless.

“Well? I’m waiting for an answer. I love you, Sam. Let’s fuck. I love you, Sam. Suck my dick. I love you, Sam. Let’s have sex. COME ON, SAM! TAKE YOUR DRESS OFF! GIVE ME A BLOW JOB WHILE I’M DRIVING! ANYTHING, GOD DAMN IT!”

I seriously considered asking him to stop the car to let me out. But we were a long way from anywhere, and it was freezing outside. I wouldn’t be able to get very far in my four-inch heels.

“HELLO! SAM! I’M TALKING TO YOU!! ANYBODY HOME?!”

Damian was looking at me, and not the road. He braked hard. “Shit,” he growled through clenched teeth, fighting with the steering wheel as the car slid around another corner.

I looked up in time to see a flash of pink. Then I heard the thud.

“What the fuck was that!” Damian whipped his head around while he fought to control the car. I felt the rear end slide out. His arms flailed around the wheel and the car screeched to a stop.

We had narrowly missed slamming into the stout trees growing on the side of the road. If the car had spun into them, I would’ve been crushed.

My heart raced. My fingers dug into the armrest. I forced myself to let go. “I think you hit something.”

“I didn’t fucking hit anything.”

“I’m going to check.” I opened my door. Without thinking, I jumped out, leaving my jacket on the seat with my purse. I was so full of adrenaline, I didn’t feel the cold as I walked up the road. My breath puffed out of my mouth in the frigid night air.

The driver’s side window hummed downward. “Get back in the fucking car!” Damian yelled through the open window.

“No, Damian! We have to check.”

“Check what?”

“You hit something!”

“It was probably a raccoon. Maybe a deer.”

“A deer? I saw pink.”

“Get in the car, goddammit.”

“No!”

“I guess you want to walk your ass home? I’m not waiting around for you.”

I ignored him and continued back the way we’d come. I could barely see anything in the red glow of the BMW’s brake lights.
 

I heard Damian’s door open. “Fine. What the fuck. I’m sure I killed Bambi or some stupid possum. So fucking what.”

I walked around the tight curve quite a ways. We had been going pretty fast. At least forty. It had taken Damian several seconds to get the car under control and bring it to a stop.

Then I saw it.

A bare foot. Wet with dark blood. “Oh my god.”

“What?” Damian asked, irritated.

“I think you hit someone.” I crept closer. “Ohmygod, ohmygod. You hit someone!”

“I didn’t hit anybody,” he sneered. His rage was now tempered by doubt. He stood beside me.

The body of a young woman lay on the side of the road. She wore fall-weather running clothes. Long sleeve shirt, puffy pink down vest, thermal leggings, a pink beanie, mittens. Long hair fanned out from beneath the beanie. Her face was turned to the side. Her legs were bent in unnatural angles. Her gray leggings were splotchy with blood.
 

“Oh my god, Damian. I think you killed her.”

“She’s not dead.”

She wore no shoes. One sock was still on, but the other was peeled off and lay next to her foot. Both socks were dotted with blood. I couldn’t tell where all she bled from, or how badly. “She looks like she was out running. But where are her shoes?”

“How the fuck should I know? Who goes running without shoes?”

“You hit her, Damian!”

“No I didn’t.”

“I heard it! We need to call 911 right now.” I’d stupidly left my purse in the car with my cell phone, otherwise I’d already be dialing. “Call 911!”

“Huh?”

“On your phone!”

“I’m not calling 911!” he growled.

I glared at him. “You hit her, Damian. You have to call the police. She needs help.”

“We’re going. Get in the car.”

“What? Are you crazy?”

“Now. In the car.” He narrowed his eyes and stalked toward me, clenching his fists. “Move it.”

Damian had gone completely crazy, and I was in trouble. My purse was in the car with my phone and my jacket. I wore nothing but a thin dress, pantyhose and heels. Not nearly warm enough for the forty-degree chill. This road had almost zero traffic at this hour. If for some reason, Damian didn’t wrestle me into the car against my will, I’d be stranded in a bad way. I wouldn’t be able to help this girl. It would take forever for me to run into town wearing heels. If I didn’t freeze first.

Damian stood in front of me. “Get in the car, or I will make you,” he hissed.

“No, Damian. We have to help this girl.”

“No we don’t,” he seethed. “I’m not warning you again.”

“I’m not leaving until you call for help.”

He shoved me in the chest with both his hands, hard. I stumbled backward and fell on my ass, skinning my palms on the asphalt.
 

“You’re crazy, Damian! You’re insane!” He didn’t seem worried about what I thought of him. “You’re a monster.” I wept freely. Tears streamed down my face.

“So what? Get moving.” He kicked me in the thigh. “In the car.”

I stared at him from my position on the ground. “You’re evil, Damian.”

“In the car.” When I didn’t move, he circled around and hooked his arms under mine. He dragged me across the rough pavement. I stood up to avoid further abrasion on the gravelly road. I flailed at him, trying to claw and gouge with my nails,, but he was behind me and there was nothing I could do. He was crushing my rib cage with his powerful arms.
 

I remembered how you’re supposed to stomp on the attacker’s toes if they’re behind you, but I kept losing my footing as he pulled me backward. I was helpless.

Back at the BMW, I noticed one of my heels had broken off during the struggle. When Damian released one of his arms from my torso to open the passenger side door, I twisted out of his grasp.

“Get back here!”
 

I stumbled along the shoulder, trying to get away. He jogged up behind me and I dodged.
 

Because of my broken heel, my footing was off and I tripped and fell onto the shoulder. Damian dove for me. I rolled out of his reach. Right over the edge of a short, steep hill that led into a stand of dark trees.

The slope of the hill was severe. I tumbled down grass, dried leaves, and undergrowth. I narrowly missed bashing my head against several tree trunks at the bottom.

I was in so much shock, I couldn’t tell whether or not I’d been hurt. Damian thundered down the hill toward me.

“Get the fuck back here, stupid bitch! I’m going to kill you! We have to get out of here, now!”

I wasn’t going to wait and find out whether he was serious about killing me or not. I picked myself up and scrambled into the trees. Prickly bushes caught my pantyhose and tore them open.
 

I don’t know how far I ran before stopping. When I looked behind me through the trees,, I expected to see Damian barreling toward me. He was nowhere to be seen.

I held my breath and listened. A minute or two later, I heard a car door slam and an engine revving.

Damian’s car drove away.

After a few minutes of silence, I crept back through the woods in the darkness. When I reached the road, I was a mess. My pantyhose were shredded. My dress was torn and falling off one shoulder. I’d completely lost my broken shoe in the brush. The remaining one still had its heel. Unsure what to do, I hobbled up the road to the injured girl. The rough pavement was murder on my bare foot.

I collapsed on the ground beside the girl and wept. I shivered and wrapped my arms around myself. I was going to freeze to death out here.