Feral Park (39 page)

“I did, but I do not recall how many.”

“Each of the prisoners was scheduled to be hanged for offences as directed by the Bloody Code. Do you know of the Bloody Code?”

“I know
of
it, but I do not know all the offences which comprise it.”

“It incorporates every thing that you can imagine, and a few things that I wager you would scarcely believe. Arson is high upon the list, along with other crimes against property, both large and petty. You see, nothing so completely dooms a man more in this day and age than that he should transgress against property rather than against a man’s person. Now I exaggerate; purse and person both—violate these and you will hang. It is a despicable business, and the laws must be changed, but Parliament will not act. Lord Godby has said, for example—have you heard of Lord Godby? No, you have not studied the Parliament as have I, for I have my own reasons—that some day sanity will return to that legislative body and banish the tendency of our constabulary and judiciary to arrest and sentence and then hang a man for what he chuses to do behind a closed door which does no harm to another except that one should take offence by its proscription in the Good Book, which, I may add, proscribes a good many other activities which to-day will neither hang a man or woman nor even raise an eyebrow in judgment. But that is topic for some other day and you must soon ready yourself for to-night’s dinner. Let me, therefore, get to the chief of it: a dozen men have escaped from Newgate, all of whom were to be hanged within two or three days, and all convicted of crimes for which no civilized society should ever kill a man. The dozen men have apparently come
hither—
to Payton Parish—along a route that fans out through the southern countryside, their presence in the parish constituting one stop among a great many way-houses throughout the south of England where each may find food and drink and temporary lodging and sympathy and additional succour before being sent on his way. Each man eventually parts company with his companions and begins a new life for himself in some quiet village or other where he may live under a new name unmolested by those who prosecute the Bloody Code.”

“Tripp’s brother and the others who escaped—they are
here
?”

“Aye. And every one of them presently under the protective offices of someone whose identity the boy would not reveal. But I have figured it out.”

“You have?”

“Yes. And it was quite an easy deduction.” Colin opened the letter and read from it: “As much as I wish to see you, Brother, I cannot risk this letter falling into the wrong hands and imperiling the lives of my mates. So I shall say only that I am close by, and safe, and have miraculously escaped the gibbet, and my luck has been extended by finding myself placed within the care of one here who seems equipped to free me, as well, from my taste for strong ale. It was ale, my brother, which fuzzed my head so that I made the mistakes in my last burn-down that resulted in my unfortunate arrest.”

“Gracious God, Mr. Alford! Do you think that Mrs. Pickler’s bawdy house is also a way-house for fugitive-victims of the Bloody Code?”

“I do not only think it, Miss Peppercorn, but I cannot imagine that it should
not
be. Which is why Wallace and Tripp and I intend after to-morrow’s denunciation of my brother’s writing, such as to soften him for our subsequent purpose, to take him directly to the home of Mrs. Pickler in Smithcoat and deposit him into her healing hands, whilst Tripp should see his own brother for the first time since they were young lads.”

“And what do you wish
me
to do to promote the scheme?”

“You must come to-morrow morning as I have asked and say all the things necessary to bring my brother low.”

“And then I may accompany the four of you to Smithcoat?”

“I should say that you will not, Miss Peppercorn, for it will not be safe. We will go the back way upon galloping horses and you will not be able to keep up with us sidesaddle.”

“Then I shall ride behind you upon the same saddle as I rode behind you when Tripp took us from the woods yesterday.”

“Still, I do not think such an adventure will be a wise one for you—with all the fugitives who will be residing in the Pickler House and such.”

Anna stepped back, her hands hooked upon her hips in a stance of indignation.“My dear Mr. Alford, I am offended nearly beyond words. If I may speak candidly, sir, you indulge yourself each day in behaviour more suitable for a woman, especially as you seek physical union with every handsome member of your own sex and repine over the laws that restrict you from forms of congress that appeal to you even beyond your present activities, and you have the effrontery to narrow down what I as a woman should and should not do!”

“Miss Peppercorn, I was only expressing a concern for your safety.”

“Allow me to fret over my own safety, if you please.”

“Moreover, Miss Peppercorn, I do not myself seek to be a woman. I am quite satisfied being a man. In fact, I am
more
than satisfied. I revel in every thing there is about my sex which recommends it and try not to think of those things that cast the male species in an ill light, a reluctance to bathe with any regularity being an example. Perhaps a woman feels exactly as I do, but I should say that
no
woman is as utterly and thoroughly enamoured of the male animal as am I, so do not seek to define or circumscribe me, Miss Peppercorn, for I defy categorization.”

“Yet
I
may be categorized quite easily by
you
. You, sir, are somewhat the hypocrite.”

There followed a silence, both attempting to catch the breath that was lost from their berating lectures to one another.

Finally Anna said with quiet and self-deprecating amendment, “It seems to be my unfortunate aim to thoroughly alienate myself from friendship with each of the three Alford brothers in succession. I have only to wonder how I will strike swords with your oldest brother, who hitherto remains on good terms with me, but mark my word that I shall find
some
way to make my multifronted attack upon your family complete.”

“To be sure, Miss Peppercorn, you have a sharp tongue,
and
a piercing wit, and you are smart enough to know exactly what you think about things, but you are
not
smart enough to know when one must hold back to preserve comity in an exchange. Now I have come to seek your assistance with regard to my brother whom I believe that you love, and here we have been speaking not long at all, Miss Peppercorn, before we have locked horns over something of minor consequence. Whether you come with us to-morrow or not, my brother will be placed into the hands of Mrs. Pickler, and whether you come or not, Tripp and Trapp will have their tearful brotherly re-union, and because I promise to tell you every detail of it, I really see no reason whatsoever for you to join us.”

“But there
is
a reason,” said Anna with adamancy. “A most important one.”

“Then quickly tell me what it is, for I shall not be blamed for detaining you from your pre-dinner toilette.”

“Upon your mention of Tripp’s brother’s occupation I was seized by thought of a brilliant scheme, the planning of which, I believe, would be aided by my presence in Smithcoat to-morrow.”

“And will you tell me your ‘brilliant scheme’?”

“That I should hire Trapp to do a deed before he leaves the parish. That I should hire him to burn down the Three Horse Inn and Tavern before it can be turned into the Three Horse Inn and Tavern and Round-back-knock-threetimes-and-you-shall-be-admitted Monkey Parlour.”

“Yes, I saw that the tavern was just this morning closed for several days for ‘improvements.’” Colin Alford thought about this for a moment and then consented by saying to Anna, “ If I tell you a time to shew up on the doorstep of the Pickler house to-morrow when we should be there, will you, in turn, tell me every thing that drives this rather disturbing desire within you to burn down the tavern?”

“I will tell you every detail, Mr. Alford, but I must tell you as we walk to the mansion-house, for I am late.”

“We would gain more time if I were to assist you with your toilette.” Colin grinned. “For I know every thing to do to make a woman look her most alluring.”

The two began to walk again, this time in the direction of the main house. “I thought, Mr. Alford, that you were inclined to appreciate the peacock over the hen.”

“Oh, but putting feathers upon the hen may be almost as enjoyable, and there are some men of my predilection who quite delight in it.”

“I thank you for your generous offer, Mr. Alford, but Miss Leeds and I will attend to my own toilette, thank you.”

“So tell, tell, tell. We are nearly to the house.”

And tell she did—every little bit.

At five o’clock Anna’s preparations were interrupted by a knock upon the door to her apartments. Miss Leeds admitted Mrs. Taptoe, who was wellnigh dresst herself except that the breasts were not snug and wanting of escape, and as Anna and her Auntie spoke, Anna pulled up the neckline to conceal them better. Anna could do nothing about the large court-plaister circlet affixed to her Auntie’s cheek in the fashion of decades past and, rather than looking any thing like the beauty mark intended, resembled, instead, a black growth of unidentifiable origin. “You look lovely, Auntie,” Anna dissembled. “But I still have much to do to make myself equally presentable to my guests.”

“Then I shall keep you for a moment only. I have most joyous news.” Anna noticed that Mrs. Taptoe held an unfolded letter in her hand. This was, at least by Anna’s account, the day for letters and intrigue.

“I will not keep you guessing, Anna. It is from my son Maurice. He writes upon the eve of his sailing from Boston. He was able to depart much earlier than had been his previous intention. Obviously, he has not had time to receive my response to his first letter, and now he shall never see it, so
that
was an afternoon which could have been better spent! But it is no matter, for he is coming sooner than ever, and very soon indeed, for the letter has reached me first only because the other ship has, no doubt, found better winds. Is it not the most wonderful news?”

“It is wonderful indeed, Auntie. And does he still guess at how you will receive him?”

“He does, and there is nothing that I can do but work most diligently once he arrives to erase each and every concern he may have. He maintains hope for the best possible outcome, and this fact, I suppose, has placed him even sooner upon a ship of transport from Boston to Southampton, the latter port being, as you know, only a few hours away from Payton Parish! But I have come also, Anna, to shew you a picture of him.”

“A picture?”

“Yes. Someone has made a sketch of him upon the letter side. He does not say who has done it. He says only that it is he in the depiction. Look for yourself, Anna. Is he not a most agreeable-looking man? Apparently, his hard life at sea and his long season in the rude wilderness of America has not robbed him of his fair looks.”

Anna saw that Mrs. Taptoe’s son was indeed a most handsome man, and she wished ever the more now to meet him. She gave her aunt a hug and was very happy for her. “I should like, Anna,” said Mrs. Taptoe, pulling away, “to shew the picture to all of my dinner companions. May I do this with your permission?”

“You need not seek my permission for such a thing, Auntie, or even the permission of my father, to demonstrate a mother’s pride in her son.”

“Thank you, Anna. I did not think that you would object, but I felt it only proper that I should ask.” With this admission, Mrs. Taptoe left the room. A minute or so later there came another knock upon the door. This time Miss Leeds admitted the Misses Drone and Pints.

Both were dresst for dinner in antiquated fashions that caused Anna to wonder if she had mistakenly led all of her guests to believe that the meal would be followed by a costumed ball. She knew, however, that neither of the two who now stood before her were well versed in contemporary fashion and so each was acquitted for the foolishness of her dress—foolishness, that is, in Anna’s private estimation, for others such as Mrs. Taptoe would perhaps think them quite stylish indeed, especially with their pearl caps and fox tippets (for were they not to dine this evening under the stars?). “I am so very sorry to interrupt your toilette, niece, but Miss Pints has something she wishes to ask you and she says that it cannot wait or she should abandon her nerve. In fact, she was becoming quite exercised over it; so I felt it best to bring her hither to ask you
before
the dinner so that she will not sit in absolute wretchedness through the entire evening, dreading to put it to you later.”

“What is it, Miss Pints?” asked Anna of the frail young doll-like woman who seemed to disappear within her over-sized gown.

Miss Pints trembled and whispered something into Miss Drone’s ear.

Miss Drone nodded and conveyed the following to Anna: “She wishes to tell
me
first, for I have no difficulty in understanding what she says. Then I will tell
you
what she has told
me
.”

“That seems a very good plan,” said Anna, as Miss Leeds began removing the curling papers from her mistress’ hair.

Miss Pints, receiving permission to communicate to Anna through the gobetween of Miss Drone, stood on tip toe so that she could bring her mouth in such close proximity to her auditor’s ear that it appeared to those who might view the scene from some distance that Miss Pints had taken to chewing upon Miss Drone’s auricle as if it were a cutlet.