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Authors: Alan Weisz

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BOOK: Finals
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Being in seventh grade, I was a little insecure about the whole deal. Hell, this dude was trying to move in on my woman. At this juncture in my life, I was more of a lover than a fighter, never the “Me Tarzan, you Jane” burly type of man, but more of the Frasier Crane sort.

 

In this instance, stepping outside my comfort zone to defend the girl I cared about seemed an appropriate response. However, Anna reassured me that Taylor’s attempts were lost on her, and that no action was required.

 


Taylor will never be able to have the rapport that we share Wayne,” Anna said to me one day at her locker. I remember the line because I later had to go home and ask my mom what rapport meant.

 

I recall Anna also telling me that she would try to be blunt with Taylor about his advances. Anna’s previous strategy had been to sweetly decline any invitation, asking for a rain check while becoming more affectionate towards me. We would hold hands more often in the hallway and get in visible tickle fights. Anna even kissed me on the cheek in class once, although later she was forced to chat with Sister Marie Catherine about her “unruly” behavior. We hoped Taylor would be able to connect the dots for himself, but our pathetic strategy didn’t stop his relentless pursuit of Miss Dawes.

 

After an afternoon of brainstorming, Anna and I devised a plan we believed to be foolproof. We would meet Taylor after school at his locker and sternly yet courteously inform him that his passes at Anna would no longer be tolerated. There was a sanctity in “going out” that Taylor’s charisma could not destroy. Since junior high students are clearly rational, mature individuals, the plan couldn’t fail, or so we thought.

 

Yet, we never were able to see our plan through to completion because of one little outburst. I wasn’t there when the incident occurred due to my miserable luck, but Anna and fellow eye witnesses state that the scene when down like this:

 

Once class ended, students began packing up their belongings, preparing to go to lunch (I sat by the door with my friend, Josh. We were always the first out the door with food trays in our hands in no less than five minutes). Anna told me that Taylor approached her as she was putting her Algebra book away and said something along the lines of, “Hey Anna! My father’s taking our new boat out on the lake this weekend. I hear the water out there is gorgeous this time of year so you must come with us. I won’t take no for an answer, missy!”

 

Anna states she got up out of her chair and politely said, “No, thank you,” as she departed for lunch. My classmate, Todd told me later than he heard the whole thing. He said that like a stone cold bitch Anna said, “Fat chance of that happening, dick,” before walking right by him, but I find it hard to believe that my darling uttered those ugly words (Todd was also known for his fabrications when it came to storytelling). Regardless of what Anna said, my classmates said that Taylor grabbed Anna’s arm, causing her to turn and face him. Then in a chilling voice he said, “What did you just say to me?”

 

Todd states Anna’s response contained several explicates but the majority of observers told me that Anna simply said, “I don’t want to go out on your family’s boat your narcissistic, little prick. Can’t you see I have no interest in you whatsoever?”

 

Given that Anna’s response was audible from the hallway, she was collected in mere moments by a teacher who led her straight into the fiery lair of Principal DuPont.

 

Anna was suspended for a week, but her efforts were not in vain. Her harsh remarks echoed throughout the hallways of St. Mary’s that week, leaving Taylor to pick the pieces of his ego up off the floor. A few of our classmates knew of Taylor’s advances towards Anna, but now the whole school had gotten the memo. The public humiliation left the boy bitter with an urgent aching to assert his vengeance.

 

After the public kick in the nuts, I believed, and my classmates agreed, Taylor would ignore Anna whist trying to belittle her whenever an opportunity presented itself. Surprisingly, the kid continued to talk to Anna frequently, though his lustful dreams of seducing her had fallen to the wayside. Now he concentrated on verbally assaulting her with the tenacity of a Fox News anchor abusing a member of the liberal media. Yet, Anna’s amour was impenetrable. Taylor’s oral attacks bounced off her as if he were merely calling her “poopface” or “fart smeller.” A whore my girl was not and her self-acceptance of that fact dulled any pain Taylor wished to generate.

 

After a week or so, Taylor came to the realization that his attempts to tear down Anna’s self-esteem were futile. However, the kid was not about to concede. He regrouped, devising a plan so wretchedly despicable, Satan himself would not have approved. Taylor began attacking Anna’s mother. My only guess is that through the grapevine Taylor had somehow found out about the cancer. My adversity didn’t use meaningless insults but he found a way to make his words have more of an impact on Anna than ever before.

 

Taylor found Anna and I huddled by her locker, discussing the awesomeness of the latest
Now That’s What I Call Music!
CD. Before either of us noticed his presence, the eel silently slithered behind Anna.

 


So Anna, how’s your mother? I heard she’s not doing well,” Taylor said nonchalantly.

 

I could tell that Anna was a little surprised by the question, as was I, since this scum bucket had never brought up Anna’s mother before. Why the sudden interest in her mother? What was his angle?

 


She’s actually in the hospital receiving chemotherapy,” Anna replied. I was shocked Anna had actually told the guy the truth. A brief, “She’s fine, thanks,” would have sufficed. What business of his was it anyways? What really blew me away is what Taylor said next.

 


I suppose, she’s finally receiving her just deserts.”

 

Holy mother of Mary was Anna pissed, her eyes narrowed, and if looks could kill, then Taylor would have been one dead son of a bitch. Knowing Anna as I did, my intuition as well as an arm flex told me that a slap was about to come Taylor’s way. I gently stroked her arm to prevent a second suspension. I wanted to see that fool get clocked, but this was not the time nor the place. She looked over giving me a slight smile to confer that the message had been received before turning back towards Taylor.

 


Don’t you dare talk about my mother that way. You don’t know her,” Anna muttered, in a harsh tone only audible to the three of us.

 


What is there to know? To me, it appears she is paying for her sins. ‘But if you do not heed me and do not keep all these commandants, if you reject my precepts and spurn my decrees, refusing to obey all my commandants and breaking my covenant, then I, in turn, will give you your deserts. I will punish you with terrible woes—with wasting and fever to dim the eyes and sap the life’ Leviticus Chapter 26.”

 

Anna and I stood in awe, incapable of locating words. Even though I hated the guy, his ability to quote scripture was rather impressive. After seven years of private Catholic schooling, I could only quote Corinthians 13:4-8, as well as a few Psalms, none of which could combat Taylor’s statement. Judging from the look on Anna’s face, her turbine was spinning ferociously too. She wouldn’t give this moment away.

 

The lull in the conversation seemed to last a lifetime before Anna finally spoke. “Those whose steps are guided by the Lord; whose way God approves, may stumble, but they will never fall for the Lord holds their hand.”

 

Pleased by a response, Taylor began to smirk. “I would have guessed Psalms was the best you two could pull off,” he said mockingly. “But you see Anna that’s assuming God approves of your mother’s actions.”

 


Because He does!” Anna yelled, slamming her locker.

 

I tried to grab Anna’s hand to comfort her, but she flicked it away. Anna’s brash demeanor was gone, and her moist eyes gave off the impression that Taylor’s words had gotten under her skin. As she fumbled with the contents of her backpack, she looked over at me, seemingly pleading for me to do or say something, anything at all. Combating Taylor’s wit was by no means simple. I knew he’d make me look like an idiot if I tried to counter him.

 

Knowing that Anna was on the ropes, Taylor moved one step closer and leaning down he delivered one last devastating body blow.

 


My apologizes, I’m sure He does. Yet, before your mother rests her weary head on her pillow this evening, she may want to ask, ‘My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?’”

 

Anna threw her backpack over her shoulder, as she vacated the hallway as quickly as possible.

 


Anna wait!” I called, but she continued briskly walking toward the exit, refusing to look back at either of us.

 

I stood paralyzed in my spot, unable to move. I could only watch as this arrogantly articulate bastard sauntered smugly away, slowly disappearing into the sea of students. As I walked back to my locker to collect my books, I couldn’t help but notice as an unusual feeling washed over me. Like a duck on a pond, my relaxed exterior masked the chaos occurring underneath the surface. An unfamiliar scintillating sensation coursed throughout my body, as if a thick coat of Icy Hot had been applied. This strange emotion must be rage, something more unknown to me than Chinese Year New. I had never in my life felt this angry, upset, and dimwitted than I did now at this very moment in time.

 

It wasn’t simply because I liked Anna that my insides felt like a spinning carousel. My intuition was shouting at me to act. I knew I needed to harness this energy. If I could apply it correctly, I could duel out passionate acts of justice like a masked vigilante. For some reason, this aching sense of duty called to me as if I was the only human with the ability to destroy this walking tumor. With this sudden, instantaneous adrenaline rush, I knew some kind of action was eminent. If I was to provide Taylor with his just deserts, then this was the time to don the cape of righteousness.

 

 

 

Chapter Seven

 

F
or several days, I did nothing. Anna didn’t talk to me, and I didn’t know what to do, or how to act. This was foreign to me, and although I sensed my darkness begging to play, I couldn’t allow it. That is, until one particular Thursday.

 

In mid-March, Mrs. Berkman, our P.E. teacher, began taking our class to Cherry Hills, the lone golf course in our town. Every Tuesday and Thursday, our class would hop on the bus and drive down to Cherry Hills in an attempt to perfect one of the many facets of the sport. For those of us with clubs, Mrs. Berkman permitted us to bring them on the appropriate days. Luckily for me, my grandfather was a garage sale enthusiast, constantly on the hunt for the next great purchase, no matter how unnecessary. Stumbling upon a set of barely tarnished clubs was one of his better finds. Little did I know, I was soon about to use these clubs for a less practical purpose.

 

Back at school, as I began to change from my golfing garb to my school clothes, I couldn’t help but notice that all of my classmates were gone, except for the lone pretty boy who viewed showering a necessity no matter how rigorous the sporting activity. I glanced from one side of the locker room to the next to see if this truly was my lucky day. Empty and empty. We were alone.

 

As Taylor exited his shower stall, towel hugged around his waist, I walked towards the front of the locker room. One of the boys had forgotten to turn off the stereo that sat in the front of the room. As the song, “Faded” began to play, I shouted at Taylor, “Mind if I turn this up? This is my jam!”

 

Briefly averting his eyes from drying off, he shrugged apathetically.

 

My heart continued to pound furiously as I sauntered over to the end of the corridor, drawing ever closer to my prey. Taylor’s locker was located towards the end of the room near the shower stalls. As he turned to get in his undies, I glided across the floor impersonating the silent but deadly walk of Michael Myers, six iron in hand.

 

When I get you all alone
I'm gonna take off all your clothes
Ain't nobody gonna interrupt my game, oh no”
 

Creeping behind Taylor, I was now in range, I wondered if it was fair to blindside the poor bastard or if he deserved this treatment. Was it fair to sucker punch someone so oblivious? After contemplating the matter for a few seconds I determined that I honestly didn’t give a shit about Taylor’s well-being given that I was abruptly about to bash his side in with a golf club. Whether he was aware of my threatening presence or not, the boy was going to get his.

 

Every night when we say goodbye
How can I help looking in your eyes
Wondering why you and I haven't hit it
Can we get it on”
 

Fortunately, Soul Decision’s chorus muffled Taylor’s scream as I teed off on his rib cage. The poor chap went down like a sack of potatoes writhing in pain on the tile floor.

 

Standing over my nemesis bare-chested and glistening, I felt like a God. Like Zeus with his bolt or Poseidon with his trident, I was in complete control over this mere mortal and it felt incredible. For the first time in my life, I was experiencing something real. Some boys get anxious kissing a girl for the first time or playing in an important sporting event, but these activities were as ordinary to me as finishing homework.

BOOK: Finals
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