Find You in the Dark (5 page)

 
I went to the refrigerator and got out a soda, tossing Rachel a bottle of water.  Which, she missed and it hit the tile floor with a loud thud.  “Nice catch DiMaggio.”  I said sarcastically.  Rachel flipped me  her middle finger and leaned down to pick up the bottle.  Once upright, she pushed it onto the counter and gave me the look that let me know I had a lot of explaining to do.  “Do not evade, Maggie May Young!  Answer my questions!  I need to know everything about your exchange with Mr. Clayton Reed.” 

 
I perched up on the stool beside my friend and slowly popped open my soda can.  Then I took my time taking a long drink before setting it down on the counter.  Rachel was ready to pop.  “C'mon!  Stop stalling!  Tell me about him!” 

 
It was at that moment that my mother decided to make an appearance.  “Tell you about who?”  She asked breezily as she took a glass from the cabinet.  My face flamed red.  I absolutely
DID NOT
want to discuss Clayton Reed in front of my mom.  As much as I loved my parents, there were limits to what I wanted them to know.  I stopped talking to my parents about my crushes around the time I started shaving my legs.  It's not as though they would be weird or overly protective or anything, it was just too embarrassing.

  “
Claay-ton Reee-eed.”  Rachel told her in a sing song voice.  I shot her a dark look and she stuck her tongue out at me, whispering, “That's what you get.”  I rolled my eyes and sighed.  My mom came over with a glass of some gross mixture of herbs that she swore kept her healthy.  “Clayton Reed?  Who is that?”  My mom asked, sitting on the stool on the other side of me.  Great, she was preparing for a full on gossip fest.  This would take awhile.  I wanted to throttle Rachel.

  “
Nobody.”  I evaded, drinking the last of my soda and getting up to throw it in the recycling bin.  “Nobody my butt!  He's the new hot guy at school is who.”  Rachel eagerly volunteered, giving my mom a dramatic raise of her eyebrows.  “Oh!  Do tell Maggie May!  I want to hear all about him!”  My mom was enthused and really getting into the girl talk. 

  “
Yes, do tell, Mags.”  Rachel agreed, grinning at me.  I turned my back on them as I  rummaged through the pantry trying to find something to snack on.  I wasn't really hungry, I just didn't want to look at them.  No sense in getting ragged about the bright pink blush I could feel on my face.  “Nothing really to tell.  I spoke with him yesterday before leaving school.  He's pretty funny, though he didn't have a whole lot to say.”  I said, pulling out a package of Oreos and cramming one in my mouth.  Yeah, it was my age old defense mechanism.  Eating, so I didn't have to talk.  Amazing that I wasn't 200 pounds by now.

  “
That's it?  Come on, Maggie, what did you talk about?  What does he look like?”  My mom asked.  “Oh he is really good looking, Mrs. Young.  He has dark hair and dark eyes.  He's pretty tall and has these awesome broad shoulders and cute as hell freckles on his nose and cheeks.”  I was a little surprised at how much Rachel had noticed about Clayton.  Considering he wasn't Daniel Lowe, I didn't think she'd pay him any attention.

  “
He sounds dreamy.”  My mom said.  I choked on my cookie.  I cleared my throat.  “Dreamy?  Really, Mom?  Did we enter a time warp and end up in 1950?”  I asked her sarcastically.  My mom rolled her eyes.  Hmm, wonder where I got that particular facial expression from?

  “
Well, did he ask you out?  Is he going to be your boyfriend?”  My mom joked, getting up and throwing her arm around my shoulders, squeezing.  I squirmed.  “Uh, no.  I'm not even sure I'm going to be his friend.  He's pretty stand- offish.”  “Maggie has a boyfriend.”  Rachel teased.  I threw my balled up napkin at her.  “You are not helping here, Rach.”  I muttered. 

 
My mom laughed.  “I'm just teasing, Maggie.  But if this boy ever becomes something, you know we'd want to meet him.”  My mom told me seriously.  I clenched my teeth.  Yeah, I knew that.  As much as I would love for Clayton to be something more, I didn't want to go through that mortally humiliating rite of passage, otherwise known as
meeting the parents.

  “
Sure.”  I said dismissively.  Rachel was trying really hard not to laugh at my discomfort.  She would be getting an ear full as soon as my mom decided to leave the kitchen.  “Well, you girls enjoy your afternoon.  Dad and I are going to the Farmer's Market in Charlottesville.  If you go out, don't forget  your house key.”  I nodded and was relieved when she left.

 
I whipped around to face Rachel who had already put her hands up in surrender.  “Don't say it.  You deserved it, stringing me along with the details like that.”  She said.  I frowned at her.  “Using my mother as your weapon was a low blow and you know it.”  I retorted.  Rachel only grinned, not concerned by my irritation. 

 
At that moment Rachel's phone went off.  It vibrated across the counter top and she had to grab it before it fell off the edge.  “What's up, Mom?”  She asked after answering it.  I resumed my seat on the stool and picked at my bright blue nail polish as I waited for Rachel to get off the phone. 

  “
Seriously?  Do I have to?”  I looked up and Rachel did not look happy.  Rachel sighed heavily.  “Fine, I'll be there in ten.”  Rachel hung up her phone and looked at me apologetically.  “You're bailing on me?”  I whined.  Rachel got up and grabbed her purse.  “Sorry, Mags, but my mom needs me to take Caitlyn to some stupid birthday party.  She was called into work.  Duty calls.”  Caitlyn was Rachel's  eight year old half-sister and permanent  pain in the butt.  Rachel lived with her mom and sister.  Her dad had been out of the picture since Rachel was five and Caitlyn's dad bailed a few years back.  Her mom worked as a nurse over at County General and often got called in, leaving Rachel to play mommy.

  “
That's cool.  Just call me later.”  I told her, not wanting her to feel guilty for having to cancel our afternoon.  Rachel gave me a hug.  “I still want to hear all about your run in with Clayton.  I know there was more to that conversation than you're telling me.”  She wagged her finger at me and I chuckled.  “Sure, whatever you say.”  I said, following her to her car. 

 
I waved as she pulled out of my driveway.  Mom and Dad had already left and I was stuck in the quiet house alone.  I really didn't feel like being by myself so I tried calling Daniel.  I got his voice mail and didn't bother leaving a message.  Well, that exhausted my entire social circle; how sad.  So I was then faced with an endless afternoon with nothing to do. 

 
Grabbing my keys, making sure my house key was on the ring, to appease my mother, I got in my car with no real agenda.  I headed over to Fayetteville, the next town over.  Once there, I made my way toward the older part of town and pulled into a small parking lot.  I looked at the beat up sign in front of the tiny brick building and smiled.  Ruby's Bookshelf was my favorite store.  I hadn't been here in months and it seemed a great way to pass the afternoon.

 
The door chimed as I went through it and I breathed in the familiar smell of incense and old books.  The owner had the best collection of eclectic and used books.  In the front of the store were glass cases full of crystals and new age jewelry.  The shelves on the walls were lined with tarot card decks and rune sets. 

 
I made my way to the back of the store, where it broke off into a separate space for the used books.  I stopped first at the small cart just inside the room, looking through the “new” items Ruby had gotten in.  I picked up a collection of essays by William Faulkner and went to a worn armchair in the corner. 

 
I was so engrossed that I didn't know
he
was there until I felt someone beside me.  I looked up to see Clayton Reed standing beside my chair, his arms loaded down with books.  He turned up one side of his mouth in a half smile.  “Hey, Maggie.” He said quietly, not looking away from me.  I felt the insane urge to smooth my hair, but I resisted, not wanting to come across like a moron.

  “
Hey.”  I said back, closing the Faulkner book and getting up so I could return it to the stack.  “So, what are you doing here?”  He asked, shifting the books in his arms.  I looked around and lifted my hands.  “Oh I don't know, baking a cake.  Learning CPR, take your pick.”  I remarked sarcastically.  Clay smiled, apparently appreciating my dry humor.  He dropped his armful of books on a nearby table and started going through them, checking them over carefully, selecting one, then disappearing down an aisle to place it on a shelf. 

 
I walked over and picked up a beat up copy of Kurt Vonnegut's
Dead Eye Dick
.  Clay appeared at my side and looked over my shoulder at the book.  “You ever read it?”  He asked.  I shook my head and looked at him.  Wish I hadn't done that.  Because being that close to him literally took my breath away.  Why did he have to be so cute?  And smell so good?  It was almost disconcerting and more than a little hard to deal with when I was trying to be all normal and stuff.

  “
You should.  It's one of my favorites.”  I started to hand it to him but he gently pushed it back into my hands.  “No, you take it.  Read it when you've got time.”  “Uh, thanks.”  I murmured, tucking the book into my bag. 

 
I followed Clay down another aisle as he put more books on the shelves.  “So you work here or something?”  I asked him.  Clay arched his eyebrow at me.  “Nah, I'm here to go fishing, or learn tight rope walking.  Take your pick.”  He volleyed my sarcasm back at me and I grinned.  “Touche, Mr. Reed.  Touche.”  He chuckled and handed me a pile of books to hold as he carefully put them in their proper places.

 
After a few minutes, Clayton finally answered me.  “I started working here last week.  You know, after I moved here.  My aunt Ruby owns the place.”  He said shyly.  Again, he seemed uncomfortable with revealing anything personal.  “Really, your aunt owns this place?  It's seriously my favorite store.  I try to come in here at least once a month.”  I told him, genuinely enthused. 

 
Clay smiled. “I'll tell her you said that.  She'd be pleased.”  “So your aunt...do you live with her?” I asked, digging again for any little bit of elusive information.  Clay turned back to the books he was putting away, his shoulders suddenly very tense.  “Yeah.”  He said shortly.

 
He was definitely communicating loud and clear that he did not want to talk about this topic.  Too bad for him, because I wasn't listening.  “So where are your parents then?”  I asked, following him again as he moved down the rows of books.  “They're in Florida.  Where I'm from.”  He answered.  Okay, he was not very good with the details.  “So, you're not living with them because...?”  I trailed off. 

 
Clay turned around and looked at me.  His cheeks had two bright blotches of red and he looked annoyed.  “Look, I'm not trying to be rude or anything.  But I don't really know you. I'm not one to vomit up my life story to random people.”  I felt my gut twist.  I tried not to be hurt by his words.  He was right after all.  He didn't know me from Adam and here I was grilling him about his life.  I was the one being rude and invasive. 

  “
Sorry, Clay.  I'm not trying to be nosy.  I'm just interested in getting to know you is all.”  I told him sincerely.  The tension left Clayton's shoulders and he seemed to relax.  He turned back to shelving the books.  “Why are you so interested in me?”  He asked quietly.  Hmm.  How to answer that one?  I didn't want to tell him that I thought he was the most gorgeous creature I had ever seen and wanted to have his babies.  That might be a little much.  So I gave him the next true statement that came to mind.

  “
I would like to be your friend.  If that's all right.” 

 
Clay looked at me strangely.  I couldn't read his expression at all and he stood quietly for a moment, studying me.  “Yeah.  That would be cool.”  He said after a few minutes.  I smiled tentatively at him and he returned my smile with one of his own. 

 
After following him around the back of the store for another fifteen minutes, engaging in casual chit chat, I finally got up the nerve to ask him the question I really wanted answered.  “So when do you get off work?  Do you want to go grab a cup of coffee or something?”  I braced myself for his rejection.  I was being really ballsy today. 

 
Clayton looked up at the clock on the wall.  “Actually I'm not technically working today.  I just came in to help Tilly with stocking the shelves.”  Clay indicated the twenty something girl who manned the cash register.  The girl looked up when she heard her name.  She was pretty, in that hippie sort of way, with long red hair and a colorful gypsy skirt. 

 
I tried not to get eaten alive with jealousy when she gave Clay a full toothed smile that clearly said she liked him saying her name.  “Tilly, I'm gonna take off now.  You cool?”  He asked, walking behind her to grab his jacket.  Tilly flicked her hair over her shoulder and straightened her loose blouse that was covered in tiny bells.  “Sure, Clay.  You going to be in tomorrow?”  She asked with barely concealed hope in her voice.  Clayton bestowed a beautiful smile on her and the jealousy raged wildly in my stomach.  I wanted that smile directed at me, damn it!

  “
Nope, I'm off until Tuesday.”  Tilly's smile fell.  “Oh, well I guess I'll see you next week.”  She said with disappointment.  She finally looked at me and I could see jealousy flash in her eyes when she realized Clayton was leaving with me.  Take that bitch!  I thought unkindly.  Wow, where did this harpy come from?  I was becoming a jealous shrew and he wasn't even my boyfriend.