I bow down, rolling my arm in front. “Yes, Ma’am,” I say in my best Southern accent. “Right away, Ma’am.”
“That’s right, bitch, you better move”—Sadie points her finger quickly and puts her hand on her hip—“Get your ass dressed.”
My phone begins to ring as I’m pulling on my boots. “Hello?” I still ask even though I know it’s my mom. I just hope she can tell me whatever it is she wants so I can get off the phone.
“Jaime, it’s your mom,” she chirps. “I have some great news!”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yes. Your cousin, Joseph, is in town, and we’re all getting together on the weekend for dinner. I’m just letting you know so you can change your plans.” That’s my mother. Never giving me a choice and always demanding that I do what she wants and completely disregarding my feelings about it. “Make sure you wear a nice dress, sweetheart. Something girly and flowing. Oh, and put your hair up too. You have a beautiful face and it needs to be seen.”
I purse my lips and grip my phone so tight I hear a creak of hard plastic about to break under pressure. “Mom, I’m busy this weekend.”
I know it’s going to go right in one ear and out the other, as always, and I wait for the response I can almost repeat word-for-word.
“Yes, you
are
busy. Here, with us, with family. Now, whatever it is people are expecting of you this weekend, tell them it’s not happening. I want you here by ten a.m. sharp. Bring Josh with you, if you like.”
I drop my head back, and I blow out an exasperated sigh. “Mom, I don’t know who this Josh is that you keep referring to. My friends are Sadie, Cade and Joss, which is short for Jocelyn.”
“What about Cade? Is he able to come?”
“Mom,” I grind out. “Cade is a girl. Her name is Cadence, remember?”
“Well, what about your boyfriend?”
I slap my forehead with my palm and press the heel of my hand into my skin. “Mom, I don’t have a boyfriend. Can you just leave it alone?”
I’m so sick of my mother pressuring me about relationships. I can’t take it anymore, and I know that when this weekend comes, she’s going to start on me all over again about boys and how I need a good man to take care of me like that’s the ultimate goal in my life.
“Come on now, Jaime.” I can hear the condescending tone in her voice—the kind that always makes me cringe like I’m being scolded for something. “Just get here on Saturday morning, bring some things to stay overnight, and we’ll have a great weekend with family and friends.”
I resist barking down the phone at her that she can shove her gathering up her tight asshole and leave me the fuck alone. I want to tell her that she can’t control me; I’m a fucking grown woman, but I do what I always do—shrink down and agree to what she wants because she’s my goddamn mom.
“Fine, I’ll be there. But I’ll be alone.”
“Great! See you Saturday!”
The phone cuts off, and I stare at the wallpaper image of the girls and me dressed up as clowns for Halloween.
“Are you okay?” Sadie asks from the doorway. I look up at her sympathetic eyes, and I nod. “Don’t let it ruin your night, or the rest of your week. I’ll be a phone call away, remember? And I’ll always give you an emergency call whenever you need it.”
“Thanks, Sade.” She wraps her arm around me, and I rest my head on her shoulder. “I don’t feel like going out now.”
“See? You’re letting her get to you already.” She stands and pulls my hands so I’ll get up. “We’re going to the movies, we’re going to have a great time, and with any luck, we’ll all get a happy ending.” She winks and sticks her tongue between her teeth. “I know
I
will.”
“I don’t need to know about you getting your freak on, Sade.”
“Hey, we don’t get freaky,” she laughs.
“Well, I’ve heard you enough times that I get the movie flashbacks in my mind. Your screams and moans basically give me the full rundown of what he’s doing to you. And there isn’t enough bleach in the whole fucking world to clean that scenario from my brain.”
“Oh my God, Jai!” Sadie’s face blushes bright red. “You heard everything?”
“Pretty much, honey. And even though I’m glad you’re getting the service that’s keeping your gears running smoothly, I don’t like to bear witness to your oil change.”
“Ew, Jai!” she cringes. “So graphic.”
“Hey, it is what it is,” I reply with a shrug.
I’m so mad I could fucking kill Sadie right now. I’m sitting in the back of Mitch’s brand new sedan next to his equally large friend, Bobby. I’ve already zoned out from his annoying voice and have no idea what he’s been talking about for the past few minutes, other than it’s something to do with protein shakes and squats.
“It’s easy enough, you know. I could get you in there, train you—”
“Sorry, what?” I say, turning away from the buildings that are zooming past the window. “Get in where?”
“The gym. I could train you. Work on your fitness levels.”
I shift to face him, but angle my body away with the audacity of his words. “I’m not exactly gasping for breath when I run up the stairs, Bobby.”
“It’s a lot of fun, Jaime,” he says with a smirk that shows he’s so sure of himself. “You’ll love it.”
“You have no idea what I’ll
love
,” I reply with a lazy grin. “But I assure you, it’s not getting sweaty and disgusting in a gym.”
His gaze on me heats and I realize how my words may have sounded to him. “So, how do you like to get sweaty?” he asks in a gravelly tone.
“I don’t. Sweaty bodies make me want to throw up.” The image of Bran and his dripping torso come back to me, and I retch. “Just…no.”
I turn to look out of the window again, hopefully ending the conversation, but he keeps talking; oblivious to my attempts at blocking him out.
We pull up outside the movie theater, and I see Cade and Joss are waiting for us along with Mark and Tom. Sadie greets her brother with a hug, and Cade communicates to me with her eyes.
I don’t fucking believe it.
“Hey, Joss.” I walk over to her and stand at her side. “What’s going on?”
She glances to the guys before coming back to me. “I’m pretty sure we’ve been set up.”
“No shit.” I take a deep breath, and I inhale her sweet flowery perfume. “You smell nice,” I say, and she blushes.
“Thank you, so do you.” I feel my face heat also, and I try to hold it back as we look at each other. “Kerbside Violet?” she asks.
“Yeah, how did you know?”
“It’s one of my favorites.” She smiles sweetly. “I love Lush products.”
“Me too. Do you like the Godmother soap?”
She nods. “It’s a shame they don’t make it anymore. I loved that, but I like Rockstar too.”
I’m about to agree and say more about the bath products, but Sadie gets our attention by telling us we need to head into the theater.
In our row, Mitch goes in first with Sadie behind him. Bobby goes in and Tom ushers for me to follow. I see where this is going so I motion for Joss to come with me too, with Tom right behind her. Cade, then Mark, take up the rest of the seats. I wait for the commercials and trailers to get going before I speak.
I lean towards Joss. “Are you as uncomfortable as I am?”
She blinks long and hard before keeping her gaze fixed on me. “Do you want to leave?”
A moment passes by while we stare at each other.
She’s serious, she’s asking me to leave with her.
I’m about to tell her to get up and head out with me when the lights lower for the start of the movie.
It’s fucking torture. Sheer painful, and fingernail-pulling torture as we sit and watch the movie. Bobby keeps brushing his arm against mine, but I pull away, which makes me lean to Joss. Tom does the same to her. In the end, we’re so close I can hear her breathing. Sometimes deep, but quick, and often through her mouth. I don’t blame her. I’m trying hard not to lose my shit at the guy trying to get closer to me. The one movie I’ve wanted to watch since it was released is being ruined by the overgrown fitness nut next to me.
“Hey, do you mind?” I hiss. His arm has completely taken over my armrest and still drifting towards me. “Personal space, Bobby.”
“Sorry,” he says, looking down where his forearm is hanging over. “I’m not used to sitting in such a small area.”
He lifts his arm and places it on the back of my seat. “Seriously? That wasn’t a cue.” I glare at him until he moves his hand off my chair and into his lap. “Thank you.” I take a quick glance to Joss and notice Tom moving back too. “You okay?”
Joss licks her lower lip and nods, leans closer to me and places her elbow on the rest between us. “They’re ruining everything.”
“What?”
“Oh, nothing,” she murmurs, then lifts her face to mine.
I can’t help but drop my gaze to her glossed lips. I feel her warm breath fan over my face and my mouth dries up. I try to swallow, but the beach in my throat makes it difficult. I suck on the straw of my soda and the bubbles fizz up my nose making me wince.
Joss’ smile makes her eyes twinkle, and I catch something there before she turns her head back to the screen.
The movie ends, and we leave the theater. The rush of the still-hot evening air hits me as we walk out of the air-conditioned lobby. But, even though the temperatures are high, I’m glad to be out of the confined space. Joss and I had spent the entire movie almost touching, and there was a point when I lost my thoughts and almost asked her if I could touch her.
I need to get to the club. I can’t keep doing this to myself. Butterfly will understand what I’m going through, and she can help me.
That sends my stomach dropping down to my feet. I’m using her, and she told me she wouldn’t be used to test my limits. But is that what I’m doing now? Testing my limits? It doesn’t feel that way anymore because no matter how much I doubted myself in the beginning, I know what I want, and I’m no longer wondering how far I will go.
Joss looks at her watch. “I’m sorry, I have to go, guys,” she says and lifts her white purse strap onto her shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow at the shop.”
She hugs Sadie and Cade, then hugs me a lot quicker than she did last night. I wonder what I’ve done as I watch her drive away in her silver Mini Cooper.
“Please don’t do that again, Sadie. I don’t need you to set me up for some cock. If I wanted it, I’d go get it, okay?”
Sadie had followed me into my room as soon as we got home.
“You’ve been down lately, and I thought you might need cheering up,” she says, her hands out to the sides. “Bobby is a nice guy, and I know he likes you.”
“Look,” I snap and rub my forehead. “I appreciate you wanting to make me happy, Sade, I do, but you can’t just set me up like that. How do you think I felt when he tried to put his arm around me, and I had to tell him to back off? It wasn’t his fault, Sade, but I’m not having some guy thinking he can just come onto me like that because of the situation we’ve been put in.”
“I know, and I’m sorry.” Sadie drops her head down, and I know she’s telling the truth. “To be honest, Jai, I thought you’d be up for it.”
An icy chill runs down my spine. “Excuse me? You thought I’d be
up
for it? You actually mean to tell me, you thought I would fuck him because I was down and he was there? Jesus, Sadie, I’m not some whore who’ll spread her legs for just anybody!”
“Calm down!” Sadie rushes to me as I begin to raise my voice. “I didn’t mean that, Jai. I meant that you’d be up for a fun hangout with the girls and guys like we usually do. What’s gotten into you? Why would you even think I thought that about you? You’re my best friend. Jaime, you know I’d never—”
“I’m sorry,” I interrupt, and feel like shit at the misunderstanding. “I’m just going through a few things right now, and I’m still getting my head around it.”
She places her hands on my upper arms and strokes up and down. “Hey, do you want to talk about it?”
“No thanks, but I need to get out for a bit. I think I’ll take a walk or go to a late coffee shop or something.” She doesn’t need to know the exact place I’m going.
She hugs me, apologizes again and then leaves me alone. It takes me less than ten minutes to shower and change, as well as putting my shoes and skirt in my large purse.
I quench my thirst with a cold bottle of water from the kitchen, and I grab my keys.
“Hey, Jaime.” I turn to see Bobby in the doorway. “So, that movie was awful, huh?”
I cock my head to the side and smirk. “I loved it, actually. Ben and Owen are hilarious together.”
His cocky grin drops and he shifts where he stands. “Oh, I thought it was Sadie’s choice of movie.”
“Nope.” I continue to drink with my back to him.
“So, what do you do for work?” he asks, and I close my eyes at his attempt at small talk. “Mitch tells me you work at Copperman’s?”
“Yeah. I work in the finance department.” It’s not common knowledge to most people, but I’m not one for sharing my personal details unless asked.