Finding Trust (Centre Games) (32 page)

Brayden contemplated Peter’s words. He made sense and he was being very revealing. Far more than Brayden expected from the father of a girl he’d just started to see.

“Have you spoken to Rihanna about this?”

“God, no. Rihanna and I don’t discuss things like this.” Peter turned to Brayden, an amused smile on his face. “You’ve got no idea how difficult it was for her to tell me about you yesterday. I think that’s also one of the reasons she relies so much on Jazz. She trusts Jazz and she doesn’t have her mother to talk to anymore.”

“Well, Peter, if it’s any comfort, I think you’ve got her pegged just about spot on. She’s opening up more and more to me each day but I have to be fairly insistent about it.”

Brayden finished his juice and put the glasses in the dishwasher. “I suppose I’d better go and see if she’s calmed down.”

“I’d say she’s off chatting to Jazz. Let her go for a while longer. Jazz’ll know what’s best for her,” Peter suggested.

“You really have that much confidence in Jazz?” Sure, he knew Jazz was Rihanna’s best friend but he was interested in Peter’s opinion of Jazz.

“I owe Jazz more than I could ever repay. She was the one who kept Rihanna together when Helena died. She was the one who did the job that I was supposed to do.” Peter had returned to staring off into the distance again. “That girl may appear flighty and a lot uppity, but she’s super smart, insightful, and loyal beyond reason to Rih. For that, I love her like another daughter.” The older man’s sentiment was clearly visible in his face.

“Yeah, no doubt about her loyalty and she is kind of fun to have around. It has been entertaining to watch her and Quade go at it these last few days.”

“That’s Jazz for you. Always full of surprises.” Peter straightened on the stool. He clearly wanted to say more and it was important to him. “Just promise me you’ll try not to hurt her, Brayden. I know no one can ever really make that promise, but I want you to be careful with her heart.”

Brayden felt the gut-wrenching uncertainty return. He still had so much to disclose to Rihanna. She had a right to know. What a damned mess. “I promise I’ll do the best I can.” That he could promise but would his best be good enough? And once Rihanna knew the truth, she may never want anything to do with him again.

“That’s all I can ask. I know you’ll keep her safe.” Peter nodded his head, clearly satisfied with Brayden’s answer. “Now are we going to keep gabbing like a ladies’ knitting circle? Or are we going to figure out how to stop these bastards?”

Brayden could appreciate a man who had his priorities straight.

Chapter Twenty-Six

“I can’t believe he’s done it again, Jazz. Just because he told me he loved me doesn’t mean he gets the right to tell me what I can and can’t do.” Rihanna fumed as she paced back and forth at the end of the bed in the room Jazz was using.

Jazz was sitting cross legged on the bed, making notes on a pad following her call with Rheeba. She sat up abruptly. “Did I just hear you say Brayden told you he loved you?”

Rihanna stopped her pacing and plopped on the end of the bed. “Yes, exasperating, isn’t it?”

“A totally cool, gorgeous, and wonderful guy tells you he loves you and you think it’s exasperating?” Jazz threw down her pen in disbelief. “Unfuckingbelievable.”

“Oh, Jazz, stop being such a drama queen.” Rihanna huffed.

“Actually, Rihanna, I think it’s you that needs to look at the drama queen bit,” Jazz spat back at her.

“What do you mean?”

Jazz moved to lean up against the headboard. “I don’t think he actually thought through what he was saying, Rih. I think he just reacted to the thought of you being potentially in harm’s way.”

“Well, he embarrassed me in front of everyone again. This is the second time he’s done this sort of thing.” She knew how whiny it sounded but she just couldn’t help herself.

Jazz adjusted the notebook on her knee, clearly about to make more notes. “Maybe you’re looking at it the wrong way?”

“I don’t understand what you’re getting at.”

“Ever think that maybe he just publically declared how much you mean to him? He pretty well argued with Tom publically about your safety. Arguing with Tom isn’t something I see these guys doing often. I think he just told his team, people that matter to him, that you’ve just gazumped them on his priority list.”

Rihanna thought on that a moment. Maybe Jazz was right. “But why did he have to go and treat me like a five-year-old in front of everyone?”

“Rihanna, I love you dearly, but you’re sounding whiny and annoying right about now.” Jazz looked at her and Rihanna knew she’d pushed her luck too far. Jazz was fantastic but even she had limits. “Rihanna, everyone has their faults. You’re seeing Brayden’s protectiveness as a fault. I’m seeing it as a measure of how much he cares. Be happy you have someone that cares enough to worry about your safety. Andy just cared about how much use my friends could be.”

Oh God. Rihanna felt sick.

She’d selfishly been carrying on like a spoilt brat and Jazz was the one who had copped the body blow from that asshole Andy. Was it uncool to wish ill of the dead? Ah, what did it matter—he’d betrayed them all and placed thousands of people at risk because of his greed.

But that gave her no reason to be a shitty friend and become so self-absorbed that she missed just how much all this had hurt Jazz. Jazz was carrying on like nothing had happened but Rihanna knew that Jazz was brilliant at hiding what was really upsetting her when she wanted to.

“Sorry I’ve been a shitty friend. I’ve been so caught up in what’s going on in my life. I’ve neglected to be there for you. I know Andy was a jerk and all for what he did. But you guys were still together when he died and that has to be hard.”

“Yeah, it is.” Jazz looked out the window. Rihanna could tell she was doing it to prevent the tears falling down her face. “Andy and I had broken up a few days ago. I just didn’t tell you. You were happy with Brayden and didn’t need me spoiling it with the Jazz and Andy breakup version nine. I’m just struggling with the guilt I feel at putting everyone at risk.”

Rihanna moved up the bed and put an arm around her in a hug. “Oh Jazz, don’t think that. None of us blame you for what he did.”

“Yeah, but I blame me. I’m a shrink, for fuck’s sake. I should be able to spot shit like this.” Jazz’s anger at herself was revealing. This one was going to take a while for Jazz to work through.

Rihanna pushed herself back against the headboard as well. “We all make mistakes. Mine has been not trusting anyone enough to have a relationship with. Yours has been trusting the wrong guy. We live and learn, I guess.”

Jazz half snorted. “That’s very Zen-like, Rih. Why the change of heart?”

“Oh no, you don’t. Don’t go getting all shrink on me now.”

Jazz just folded her arms over her chest. “Just answer the question, damn you. You know how much I like to prod and probe at things.”

Rihanna cleared her throat, suddenly finding it hard to speak. “I think I love him as well. I think I’m just looking for excuses to push him away, sort of easier to create a reason to finish than to really make the effort to see where it could go.”

A satisfied smile crossed over Jazz’s face. “Mmmm, you have been paying attention. So what are you going to do now? Yell at him or tell him you love him?”

Rihanna didn’t have to think on that very long. “Umm, a little of both.”

“Good answer.”

Rihanna continued to sit beside Jazz, not moving.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Jazz prompted. “Go tell him.”

“What about you?” Rihanna asked, unsure whether to leave Jazz just now.

“I’ll be fine. I have a bit longer of beating myself up then I’ll decide it’s time to let it go.”

That’s one of the other things Rihanna loved about Jazz. She always had a plan. Even if it was one that involved beating herself up.

“You’re sure there’s nothing I can do?” Rihanna asked, getting off the bed and heading to the door.

“Not unless you can go back in time and change the fact that I met Andy. I’ll just live vicariously through you for a bit.”

“Done.”

***

Rihanna found Brayden at his desk. He noticed her at the door immediately; in fact, he’d heard her walk down the hall. He could pick out her walk anywhere.

“Can I come in?”

“Of course you can, you don’t need to ask.”

She nodded at his words, closed the door softly and sat on the leather lounge. All he could think of was how hot she looked in those skimpy denim shorts. Good thing the guys knew she was off limits. If he saw any of them looking at her the wrong way, he’d make them damn sorry they were silly enough to poach on his territory.

He knew why she was here. They had barely spoken two words since the meeting this morning. He also knew he had to make the first move. It was his outburst at the meeting that had caused the issues.

“I guess this is the bit where you yell at me for suggesting you not be part of the team tomorrow.”

“That about covers it or do I need to actually yell to make my point?” Her tone was short.

He pushed his chair back from the desk and scrubbed his face with his hands. “No, the glare you pegged me with across the table was enough to let me know I’d overstepped the mark.” Rihanna was about to spring back with something but he cut her off. He needed to end this, not continue to fuel it. “I’m sorry I upset you in front of the team again, Rihanna. I know I said I wouldn’t but something just happens to me when I think you might be in danger and all I can think of is getting you out of there.”

She didn’t say anything, just nodded solemnly. “Jazz says it’s because you love me and feel the need to protect me.”

“That’s exactly how I feel. The thought of you in danger just makes me react. My brain just doesn’t seem to engage real well when I think you might be in danger.” He knew his possessive and protectiveness was amplified by his animal characteristics. He just couldn’t tell her that, yet. In fact, he thought he was doing well not to drag her out of here and go and hide her somewhere until all this craziness was over.

“I understand that now, Brayden. But how are we going to deal with it?” She was calm and he was glad that she seemed to want to work this out rather than fight.

“What do you mean?”

“You can’t just go making decisions about what I am and aren’t going to do without talking to me about them first. I’m not telling you to not be involved in this.”

“Rihanna, this is my job. I’m trained to do this.” Fuck, he’d been created specifically for this purpose.

She pushed on. “That’s not what I’m talking about. You’ve done it twice. First, when you forbid me to see Jazz and then with you demanding I not be involved in the assignment tomorrow.”

Forbid—
ouch! That word hurt. Really hurt. Did she really see it like that? She must have.

He got out of the chair and joined her on the lounge. He wanted to touch her but wasn’t sure how or where he should. “I didn’t mean it like that, Rih. I just can’t stand the thought of you being in unnecessary danger.”

Minky solved the problem for him. She closed her hands around his forearm. The contact was enough to make him feel better. Surely they could work it out.

“I know that, Brayden, because Jazz pointed it out to me. Actually, she kind of beat me over the head with it.”

“I’m starting to realise Jazz can be very direct when she wants to be.”

Rihanna gave a little snort of laughter. “She can be. You haven’t seen anything yet.”

“What else did she say? I can’t believe she stopped at just that.” If these two were going to talk about him, he at least wanted the whole story.

She gave him that little chin tilt, look out of the corner of her eye thing that he loved. “Umm, she said you made a public declaration of how important I am to you by speaking out like you did to Tom in front of the team.”

“Yeah, maybe I can see why she’d say that. But they already knew how important you are to me. I spoke to the guys a few days ago.” He hadn’t mentioned his showdown with the boss. She didn’t need to know about that just yet. The ball was in the boss’s court for the moment.

Rihanna inhaled sharply, clearly surprised that he’d spoken to the guys. “I thought only girls gasbagged about relationships.”

He chuckled. “No, love. Us guys do it as well. Particularly when our personal lives spill over into our work ones, which often happens with my team.”

She looked up at him with her eyes so full of warmth and pleading. “So do you understand why I have to be part of it tomorrow?”

He lifted her hands from his arm and laced her fingers through his. “I do understand, Rih, but I’m just like your dad. We can’t stand the thought of anything happening to you.”

“But you’ll be there to protect me, won’t you?”

She was mocking him and he knew it. This was serious business. These guys had already proved they were okay with killing if necessary. “I want you to remember how dangerous this could be, Rihanna. These guys are serious. I know you’re desperate for this thing to be over but I want you to think about sitting out. There’s no shame. Shit, you might even be pregnant, which is just another good reason to sit out.”

He knew he was wasting his breath but he wanted to try convincing her to sit out one last time.

“I know you’re worried, but I’m not sitting out. Tom was right; my father and I have the most knowledge of the virus. We need to be there to spot potential signs. I’ll be careful. And we don’t know whether I’m pregnant. It’s really a stretch to be worried about something that is not even likely.”

He could see the logic from her perspective and he couldn’t argue with her without disclosing the truth about himself.

This checkmate situation was killing him.

He hated not telling her everything about him. But this thing was almost over; then he could take the time he really needed with her and hopefully she’d trust him.

“Promise me you’ll be careful and do everything I tell you?” He squeezed her hands, emphasising his words.

“Okay, I promise.” She dropped her head and he knew there was a “but” coming. “The reason I’m promising is because I know how much you’re concerned about this. I feel the same about you and your safety.” She lifted her head and looked into his eyes. “I feel this because I’ve realised over the last couple of days that I love you, too. I know this because for the first time I actually want to work out my differences with a guy rather than cutting and running.”

Brayden pulled her into his arms. She snuggled in like he’d become accustomed; it felt good, real good. For the first time in his life, his heart felt full. That piece that had been missing for so long seemed to slip into place.

And it fit perfectly.

He stroked his hand through her silky hair. It was so beautiful to look at, a kaleidoscope of colours. “It’s going to be okay, Minky. We’ll end this situation with the Chinese then we can focus on us for a bit.”

Rihanna hugged him tighter. “I’m scared, Brayden. I know you think I’m not being responsible by going but I’m actually doing the opposite. If there’s a chance that I can stop this, then I need to be there. If we don’t stop it, who knows where it could go? I’d never be able to live with myself.” She paused before continuing. “I’m only slightly sane at the moment because I know you’ll have my back. That helps with the fear.”

“You’re right, baby. I’ll have your back.”

“Let’s finish this so we can have a little time away from all the craziness.”

“Okay. We’ll finish it together,” he promised.