Fire Nectar (20 page)

2012

Dani drove north on the Pacific Coast Highway with the
music loud and the top down in a vain attempt to clear her mind and judge her
motives for herself. She didn’t want to believe what had always been proven
true: Elizabeth knew her far better than she knew herself. “Switching Off” by
the band Elbow blasted from her speakers and she joined in, quietly, with her
favorite line, “Teaching her how to whistle like a boy,” before she fell silent
again. She had driven for hours up and down the coast, u-turning at Geoffrey’s
restaurant sixteen times to double back to Santa Monica Pier and round once
more.
 
To her left the Pacific Ocean
broke hard against the sand, and the wind whipped through her skin, cold and
biting.
 
It felt great. Finally the
clock struck 3am, and she flipped an illegal U-turn to head back up the 10
freeway to Culver City.

She parked behind Nectar, got out and knocked on the back
door. She heard Brian call out, “Someone’s at the door!” followed by Adrian’s
footsteps and his heartbeat as it gained momentum, pounding faster, excited in
a way that gave her hope.
 
He opened
the door and confirmed what she suspected – he wanted it to be her. He
smiled in happy surprise and motioned for her to come in. The usual suspects
sat around the bar and a couple of the guys smiled at Dani as she sat down.
 

 
“I’ll just be
a few minutes. I’m almost done counting the drawer,” Adrian said to her.
 
She nodded.
 
“Hey guys, I’ll see you later.”
 
The men, looking visibly put out, downed
their drinks and mumbled goodbyes in varying phrases. Brian continued to dry
the glasses.
 

 
“I’m not
done, but do you want me to go home too, Adrian?” he asked, smirking. Adrian
didn’t look up from counting the money as he nodded.
 
Brian’s smile widened and he grinned at
Dani, who stared back at him.
 
He
chuckled, gave Adrian’s back a playful punch, grabbed his keys and jacket and
made a hasty exit, whistling as he left. When the door closed behind him,
Adrian turned around and looked at Dani.

 
“I guess you
know I came by today,” Adrian said to her, a handful of twenties in his hands,
mid-count.
 
She nodded. “Julian said
he’d tell you.
 
Nice guy.”

 
“He is.” She
didn’t know what else to say.
 
She
wasn’t even sure why she was here.

His words eerily echoed things that were in her mind.
“I’m glad you’re here.
 
I don’t know
why you’re here, but I’m glad you’re here.
 
I’ve been thinking about you all day.”

 
“I’ve been
thinking about you, too,” she admitted, gratefully.

He looked at her with a funny expression and said,
 
“It was weird.
 
I could have sworn I heard you call my
name today.
 
I was standing in your
hallway and I thought you were there and I turned around and… you weren’t
there. It was just in my head.”

 
“You heard me
call you?” Dani asked, taken aback.

 
“Yeah, but
then it turns out you were across town with your editor and there I was,
confessing I heard you to Julian and looking like a complete dweeb.”
 
He laughed at the memory and stopped,
adding, “
Kinda
like how I look right now.
 
What is wrong with me?
 
Sorry.”
 
He laughed and went back to counting.
 
She smiled.
 
He had heard her.
 
Had she called to him in her sleep?
 
She’d never heard of such a thing
happening but that didn’t mean it wasn’t possible.
 

 
“Adrian. I
was there,” she said, jumping off a cliff and hoping for the best.
 
He didn’t say anything at first.
 
He put the money down and leaned back
against the bar for steadiness.

 
“You were
there?”
 
He asked.

 
“Yes.”

“In your apartment, or in the building?”

“In my apartment.”

“Okay. Why didn’t you answer the door?”

“I couldn’t,” she said, her face filled with fear.
 

“Why not?” He asked in an unreadable tone.

“Because…I…because…I couldn’t. I just couldn’t.
 
I’m sorry.” She didn’t have the courage
to tell him the truth. What if he ran?
 
What if he shunned her like her father had?
 
What if he called her a monster or a
demon – she couldn’t bear the thought and got up to leave. She was almost
to the door when she heard his voice.

“Dani, it’s okay…look.” Something in his voice stopped
her and she turned.
 
There he stood,
eyes closed, hair pulled away from his neck as he offered it to her.
 
She saw his jugular pounding in time
with his heartbeat and she gasped.
 
He opened his eyes and met her gaze with silent calm and
understanding.
 
He nodded and she
cleared the distance in a flash, their arms encircling one another as they
fiercely embraced.

She moaned in his ear, her fangs sharp and
ready,
“Are you offering yourself to me?”
 
She could feel the fear in him, in his
breath on her ear, in the slam of his heart against her chest, crashing again
and again.

“On one condition,” he said. She pulled back to see his
face and showed him that she was ready to hear anything he had to say.
 
He looked at her mouth and touched her
lips, checking for permission.
 
She
nodded.
 
He touched her top lip to
expose her fangs.
 
She let him study
them and he was awestruck by what he saw. The intimacy and silence was
incredible to her.
 
She’d expected
terror or anger or … not this.

He embraced her closer and dragged a finger along the
razor sharp tip causing a drop of his blood to fall onto her tongue. Her eyes
flashed and he saw pain building in them.
 
“Suck it,” he invited, watching her wrap her lips gratefully around his
finger to take a sip of ecstasy.
 
He
moaned at the site.
 
“Daniella,” he
said, pulling her hair away from her beautiful face.
 
“Take me with you.
 
I want to come with you.” She froze and
released him.
 
She couldn’t believe
what she had heard.
 
Before he knew
what had happened she was on the other side of the room, his arm aching
slightly from the force of her departure.
 
Instinctively he held it, trying to massage the pain away. The strength
and speed of her amazed him.

“Explain.” she ordered him quietly.

“Really?” He leaned against a wall and looked at
her.
 
He was not drunk.
 
His light blue eyes were clear and she
could see that he had made his decision.

“You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“I do.”

“You couldn’t possibly.
 
I have been like this for almost two
hundred years, and I can tell you from experience that you could not possibly
know what this is like.” She stood, her feet planted firmly on the ground,
hyper aware.

“You’re right.
 
I couldn’t know what living for two hundred years is like.
 
What I meant to say was … I
want
to know what that is like.
 
I can’t
stop thinking about you.
 
And I can
see you’re hurting. I know I can help.”

“Adrian, listen to me.
 
Eternity is a very long time.”

“I could give a fuck.”

“It’s more romantic when you’re on your side of it, when
you’ve seen the movies and heard the stories.”

“I know there’s more to it than that.”

“So much more.
 
You don’t grow older, you don’t change,”

“Sounds terrible,” he said with a smile.

“While those around you, people you love, die.”

“Dani, I love you and you’ll never die, so what do I have
to worry about?”

Those three words crushed her resolve as they had done to
millions of men and women before her.
 
She walked to him, but as she did, her face transformed from stone to
kindness.
 
The real Daniella, at her
core, stood before him and she said in quiet warning, “They say a fool is one
who runs into the unknown without thought.”

“Actually that would be more like an act of
courage.”
 
He received a frown in
response and it angered him. He went back behind the bar and picked up the pile
of abandoned money to count it. “Oh you just want me to fucking tend bar and
count money at 3am and deal with assholes who don’t tip when I tell them last
call was over a half hour ago – time to go home
?!
 
I’m worth so much more
than this, Dani
,
I thought you saw that
.
 
Why do you keep coming around then?
 
Why do you look at me the way you do
when you don’t look at anyone else like that?
 
I see your eyes.
 
You’re dying inside.
 
You don’t want to be alone anymore.
 
Let me help you.
 
Let me come with you, dammit!”
 
He almost threw the money on the floor
but stopped himself and put it back in the drawer, gripping onto the counter
with his head down to control his anger.
 
His voice was quieter then as he said, “If you think you’re protecting
me, don’t.
 
It’s a bullshit excuse.

“Why do you think I’m protecting you?” she asked.
 
He jumped at how close she was.
 
She had cleared the distance without him
hearing her take a step, and he straightened up and faced her. “Why?” she
asked, her head cocked.

 
“Because in
the stories vampires are always protecting the human from the big bad land of
immortality. ‘I love you so I can’t’ blah
blah
blah
. It’s fear.
 
You’re not “brave” because you don’t feel fear – you’re brave
because you feel fear and you do the thing anyway!
 
You have to take chances.
 
When an opportunity presents itself, you
take it.
 
No pausing.
 
No excuses.
 
No fear.”

“You’re right. You sound like Elizabeth.
 
She said very much the same thing to me
earlier tonight. And you’re right. You see, I thought I was protecting you,
Adrian, but I wasn’t.” She made sure he heard her, and touched his cheek,
running her fingers through his hair.
 
“I was protecting me,” she said and sank her teeth into his jugular.

He yelled out in pain, in surprise, and writhed against
her, instinctively trying to shove her off.
 
She lifted him up with ease and ignored
his desperate thrashing, drinking his blood and hushing his moans as it poured
into her mouth and stopped only once to whisper, “
Shhhh
….
Remember this. It will only happen once.”
 
His body went lax. “Good, that’s better… you taste amazing.
 
I knew you would.”
 
Stunned, he felt the strength passing
out of his body.
 
He tried to pay
attention but grew dizzy and felt his eyes close.
 
He wrapped his arms around her as he
tried so hard to focus.
 
To trust her.

Fear rushed through him again and he thrashed some more,
expertly subdued by her strength. Flashes of colors passed before him and
weakness turned to serenity.
 
They
clung to each other.
 
He felt his
energy and strength seep into her mouth and images flashed before him: Running
in the woods while on a camping trip with his family. The fire pit and warming
his hands on it while his dad told stories. Drink.
His first
sex, how clumsy and awkward.
Laughing with friends. Drink. A fight with
his first love, first girlfriend and the way she’d slapped him across the face.
Drink.
His mom telling him to make a wish and blow out a
birthday cake on his twelfth birthday.
Drink.
A bacon
cheeseburger.
 
A shot of whiskey in a glass, toasting with the regulars.
 
Whiskey… he wouldn’t be able to…
“Drink.” The word wasn’t coming from him.
 
He heard the voice commanding him but it was so far away and he was so
tired.

“Adrian, Drink!” Not strong enough to lift himself, she
guided him to a wound she had sliced in her own neck. His eyes strained to open
and he saw her hair, her neck, the blood pouring from it, and darkness again as
she cradled his mouth against the gash, repeating again - Drink. The first drop
hit his tongue and his body lurched and
spasmed
at
the taste and, wrapping his hand around the back of her head, he embraced her
and clamped his mouth firmly around her neck. And drank.