Flesh: Part Eight (The Flesh Series Book 8) (3 page)

I'm falling in love
with Lucian Reddick.

CHAPTER TWO

You're afraid of
me. Of this. And that's okay because I'm scared too.

I'm desperately
afraid. Afraid of falling for the wrong man. Afraid of being hurt
again. He has hurt me so much. He's capable of hurting me a lot more.
I know this, but after hearing about his wife and child and all of
those beautiful confessions, I'm willing to take the chance. I'm
willing to give whatever this is a chance.

He kisses my neck
softly as he unbuttons the front of my blouse, and I crane my head
back, moaning softly, thinking about how I thought I would never feel
his sweet lips on me again. Yet here we are. It only took a matter of
minutes for him to destroy my resolve completely. I hate that he's
capable of that. It makes me feel like a failure. I don't want to
think about that right now though. I just want to think about
him—about being with him like this.

His fingertips brush
my shoulder as he pushes my shirt down over my arms. I try to wiggle
free from it, but then his palms wrap around the sleeves of my shirt,
and he uses it to pull my arms back. Immediately, I'm reminded of his
obsession with control. When I look up at him, his eyes are dark. All
of those wonderful things I thought I saw before are still there, but
there's a hint of familiarity. I know that his mind is drifting to
dominant places. He can't just love me like a normal man would. He
has to own me.

“
Lucian,”
I whisper only seconds before his mouth crashes down onto mine.

The romantic part of
him goes away, and the carnal part comes out to play. While I enjoy
that part of him, it's not what I need right now to feel connected to
him. I'm worried that I might lose him to the side of him that's
consumed by lust.

I pull away from the
kiss, turning my head, and he seizes the opportunity to kiss down my
neck instead. He lets go of the sides of my shirt, allowing his hands
to slip to my waist and draw me against him again.

Lucian threads his
fingers into the hair at the nape of my neck, pulling my head back
further, almost painfully so, to give him more leverage. His kisses
are rough, deep and biting. I wince when he clips my skin with his
teeth, cry out when he sucks a little too hard.

“
Lucian,”
I say his name again, trying to remove the needy sound from it. He
looks at me, his breath already a bit ragged. “Not so hard.”

“
I
thought you liked it hard.”

“
I
do, but not all the time.” I smile shyly. “A girl likes a
bit of romance.”

“
Romance?”
He arches an eyebrow.

“
Yes.
Romance.” I lightly claw down his chest, causing him to visibly
shiver. When I glance down between us, I can see that his cock is
straining against his pants.

“
I
haven't done romance in a very long time.” He presses his
forehead against mine.

“
Not
since her, I bet.” I nod towards one of the pictures. It feels
like I'm purposely trying to sabotage the mood, like there's still a
thread of uncertainty inside of me that wants to steer us away from
sex. This wasn't supposed to happen tonight. I was supposed to walk
away, to never want him again.

“
No.
Not since her.” He draws his tongue across his bottom lip.

“
You know, we
don't have to do this tonight. We can just talk.” I make lazy
circles with my fingertip over his heart.

“
Talk. Is that
really what you want to do?” I can hear the grin in his voice.
“I think I've talked enough for the both of us already.”
He takes a step forward, even though there's barely enough space for
it.

When he dips to kiss
my neck, I know that talking isn't at all what's on his mind. Why
should I have expected anything different? This is who he is. All
sex. Well, mostly sex. To say he's all about sex wouldn't be quite
fair. But close enough.

His hands roam my
curves. He gives a small tug to the back of my shirt and slips it off
the rest of the way. Apparently, he has taken my words to heart
because some of the heat has died down from his actions.

His kisses are
gentle, trailing down my neck and over my shoulder. He entwines his
fingers with my bra straps and pulls them down a little, as if he
can't stand not to kiss that small strip of skin that they cover. My
hands begin to move down his sides, lower and lower, each hard line
of muscle working like a wire connecting us, sending electricity
straight to my core.

His mouth finds the
slope of my breasts. He wraps his arms around me and buries his face
between them, which makes me blush madly.

When his hands slip
behind me to begin unfastening my bra, I wiggle my fingers down the
front of his pants, using the V of his hips as an entry point. I tug
at his pants lazily, trying to figure out how to get them off when
he's so all over me.

“
You're not
wearing underwear,” I mumble.

“
Does that
bother you?” He pulls my bra forward and slides it down over my
shoulders before tossing it aside.

“
There's not
much for me to unwrap.” I smirk.

He rubs my back
gently, resting his head on my shoulder. “It's not like you
haven't seen it all before.”

“
I suppose
not.” I press my head against his chest, listening to his
heartbeat.

His body tenses for
a moment. “So what are you going to tell your boyfriend?”

I'm surprised he'd
even bring it up. And for a moment, I think that he purposely did so
that he could try to scare me away, much like he tried to do in the
limo after we left Fleshfest. That happened after we had sex though.
It doesn't make sense to me that he wouldn't try to get what he
wanted first.

I pull away from him
a bit. In truth, I feel horrible about doing this to Derrick. We're
not actually dating, but he's going to be so pissed. He'll tell me
that I should have been smarter than to fall for Lucian's bullshit
again. Is it bullshit though?

My eyes wander over
Lucian's face. He looks incredibly serious, completely pulled out of
the moment, as if the answer actually matters to him.

I take a deep breath
and then exhale, embarrassed that I went so far as to lie to try to
get him to leave me alone. “There is no boyfriend.” I lay
my palm flat against his chest, staring at my fingers, unable to look
at him. I don't even want to imagine his expression. More than
likely, it's mocking or amused or something else that will make me
feel terrible.

“
I'm glad.”
He kisses me on the forehead before drawing me into his arms again.

I blink a couple of
times in disbelief. He actually sounds relieved. It only makes my
magnetism towards him grow stronger.

“
Would you
have stopped if I really was dating Derrick?” I ask
apprehensively.

“
I suppose
you'll never know, now will you?” There's the smile I had
expected, but since it came after the fact, I'm not so upset with him
about it.

“
You're kind
of a jerk.” I tap his chest before pulling away from him and
turning around.

“
I'm very
aware of that.” He follows, sliding an arm around my waist and
another across my chest to draw me back against him. His lips are on
my neck in an instant, his hot breath causing goosebumps to rise on
my skin. I can feel his dick pressing hard against my ass, and my
clit pulses in approval. I want it inside of me. I won't be leaving
here tonight until I've felt him inside of me. I know that without a
doubt now.

The hand that was
clutching me around the waist moves down to find the zipper of my
skirt. All the while, Lucian's mouth never leaves me. I moan softly
as he kisses me and undresses me at the same time. He's very talented
at multitasking, I think with a mischievous grin playing across my
face.

Once my skirt hits
the floor, I step out of it and then turn to face him again. I expect
him to take me into his arms, to kiss me like he means everything
that's happened in the last several minutes, but instead, he
immediately grabs the sides of my underwear and kneels in front of me
as he pulls it down ever so slowly.

My
self-consciousness gets the better of me—probably because he's
eye level with my chubby stomach—and I use my hands to cover
myself as best I can, placing one across my stomach and the other
over my mound, even though I know he's going to gripe at me for it.
He gazes up at me from the floor, and my mind flips to an insane
place. It looks like he's about to propose. That's definitely not
going to happen though. Wishful thinking that's completely misplaced.

As expected, he
reaches up to move my hands away. I screw my face as I give
resistance, my anxiety rising.

“
Amy,”
his voice is deep and warning.

“
You're way
too close to my stomach,” I grumble.

“
I love your
stomach.” He kisses the back of my fingers since I refuse to
move them. “I love every part of you.”

Love is such a
strong word. I wonder if he even realizes what he's saying.

“
Well, I
don't. And I'd prefer if you didn't look at me like that.” I
close my eyes so that I don't have to see him being exposed to all of
my flaws.

He stands finally,
surrendering to the fact that I'm not giving in. Even though he's
seen my body in its pudgy glory multiple times already, there's
always a little voice in the back of my mind telling me that he hates
what he sees and that I'm not good enough.

“
Come here.”
He slides a hand around my waist, gazing down at me, his dark hair
falling in front of his eyes and making him look super sexy.

“
I'm sorry,”
I mutter.

“
It's fine.”
He walks me backwards towards the bed. “We're just going to
have to do something I know you like, then.”

“
I like a lot
of things.”
Just
not you staring at my jelly rolls.

“
I
know you do.” He picks me up and sets me on the bed in one
fluid motion, causing me to gasp in surprise.

“
I
hate it when you do that.” I furrow my brow though I'm not
really angry.

“
Why?”
He kneels between my legs, a gorgeous smile splitting his lips and
showing rows of perfectly white teeth, teeth that are very prone to
biting. Just thinking about it makes my cheeks grow warm. That, and
the fact that he's tummy level with me again. And even worse, that
I'm sitting down now, so my stomach is definitely rolling.

“
Eyes
up here.” I put two fingers under his chin, keeping his
attention fixed on my face.

He only honors my
wishes for a split second though. I cringe as he places his hands on
my legs, spreading them a bit wider before he leans down to kiss my
inner thigh. I might actually enjoy it if I wasn't so self-conscious.
Desperate to try to find some middle ground, I decide to lay back on
the bed. Not only will it make my stomach look flatter, but I won't
have to see what he's doing.

I expect him to
protest, but he doesn't. Instead, he runs the blade of his tongue up
my inner thigh, reaching the V between my legs before kissing a path
back down. I exhale deeply, not even realizing that I was holding my
breath on his ascent. My core throbs needily, wanting his mouth
there, knowing that it won't be long before he finds that tiny spot
that drives me wild.

“
Hook
your legs around my shoulders,” Lucian tells me.

I strain to look at
him as I do what I'm told, not wanting to accidentally hurt him. Once
my legs are on his shoulders, I try to hook my feet around his neck,
accidentally drawing him closer to my sex.

“
Someone
is eager,” he teases.

“
Sorry.”
I cover my face with both hands, utterly mortified.

“
Don't
be.”

Before I even have a
chance to recover, I feel his tongue slicking around my cleft. I gasp
and buck my hips, the muscles in my legs tensing, pulling his face
even closer to my pussy. I think to apologize again, but when I open
my mouth, the only thing that comes out is a long moan as he wraps
his lips around my sensitive bud and sucks until tiny contractions
spring to the surface, threatening to dropkick me right over the edge
of my first orgasm.