Authors: Amitav Ghosh
But he was helpless; flattening his back against the door, he said:
Samajhni nu?
You understand, no? I have no money.
He was half-hoping that she would tell him to be gone, but instead she smiled and lay down on the charpoy. It doesn't matter, she said. You can pay some other time. You're not going anywhere and nor am I. We are both
fauj-ke-ghulam
â slaves of the army.
Her face was delicately shaped, with rounded curves that were
echoed by her nose ring. In her mouth there was a hint of the redness of paan and it made her lips look so full that she seemed to be pouting.
Why are you just standing there? she said. Rising from the bed, she went up to him and unfastened the waist flap of his trowsers and pulled on the drawstrings of his jangiah.
Young as she was, she seemed to know his uniform as well as he did: he looked down at himself and saw that his body was bare exactly from the bottom of his belly to the middle of his thigh.
She seemed to think that this was all the unclothing that was necessary, and lay down again â but this only confused him further and he stood where he was, with his hands clapped over his crotch.
A frown appeared on her face now, as if to indicate that she could not understand why he was still standing motionless by the door. She reached out, caught hold of his hand and pulled him towards her. He could take only small steps, because his trowsers were now snagged around his knees, and finally he just toppled over, collapsing on the bed.
She smiled bemusedly: it was as if she had never before encountered a man who did not know what to do, and was hard put to believe that such a species existed.
Her face grew serious as she helped him untangle his legs.
Pahli baar?
First time?
He was about to lie, but then he saw that she was not asking in a belittling way, but only because it had not occurred to her that a man, a sepoy, could be confused and uncertain in these matters.
She began to help him, guiding his hands into her gharara. But his fingers were soon lost in her skirts â he had never imagined that there could be so much cloth and so many folds in a single garment. In his dreams this part had always been easy.
And even when his hands at last found their way to her limbs, nothing was as he had expected: those parts that he had glimpsed when women were bathing, or relieving themselves in the fields, seemed completely different now that they were joined together in another human being.
At some time they both realized that they would never again be able to recapture the amazement and wonder of this moment â and even for her, who had already grown accustomed to being
with men, his discovering hunger came as a surprise, so that she seemed to see her own body in a new light. At a certain moment she found, to her shock, that she was naked â she would tell him later that she had never been in such a state with a man before; it was something the other women would have despised her for had they known â but that day she was heedless of all restraint and this became a bond between them, for now they both knew a secret about one another.
For many weeks after that day Kesri could not stop thinking about Gulabi. He went to her so often that his credit with the house ran out. When Seetul and the other recruits laughed and said,
Piyaar me paagil ho gayilba?
Have you become mad with love? he did not deny it.
For a long time it was a torment to him that Gulabi was visited by other men. But eventually he grew used to it and it even gave him a grim kind of pleasure to know that her other clients were being cheated, because none of them would ever have from her what he had.
It was not till some years had passed that she told him why she had waved to him from the window on the day when they met.
You remember, Kesri, that time when you were stripped by Bhyro Singh? You were not the only one to be beaten that day.
Who else then?
After he had finished with you, he came to me â he took me into a room and after he had done what he came for, he slapped me and hit me.
But why?
She made an uncomprehending gesture.
Kya pata?
What do I know? But he's done it to some other girls too. It seems to give him pleasure.
Kesri thought about this for a bit and it made him shudder.
I swear, Gulabi, he said. The day that Bhyro Singh dies I'll give away a maund of sweets â that is if I don't kill him myself first.
She laughed: Don't forget to give me some of those sweets. I can't wait to taste them.
For several days Zachary neither saw nor heard from Mrs Burnham: so complete was the silence that it seemed as though she had
forgotten about arranging a private meeting with him. But just as he was growing accustomed to the idea that the meeting would never happen, a khidmatgar arrived with a parcel. There was an envelope inside, sitting on top of a fat book.
October 10, 1839
Dear Mr Reid
I offer you my sincerest apologies for my prolonged silence. The news from China has been very disquieting of late and we have all been much preoccupied. But you must not imagine that I have allowed the affairs of the World to drive from my mind the Pledge I had made to you. Nothing could be further from the truth. You and your Sufferings are constantly on my mind: you could even say that I am haunted by them.
You will remember that I mentioned a doctor who has made a special study of your Affliction. His name is Dr Allgood and he has been sent here from England to attend to the lunatics in the Native and Europeans-Only Asylums (you will no doubt be interested to learn that it is the Condition from which you suffer that has driven most of the Inmates out of their minds). Not only is Dr Allgood one of the world's leading authorities on your Disease, he has dedicated his life to its eradication. It is because of his Crusade that the people of this city have come to be alerted to the spreading Epidemic.
It so happens that I had helped to arrange a few Lectures for Dr Allgood and am therefore well acquainted with him. Wanting to profit from his wisdom I had sought an Interview but this proved difficult to obtain for the Doctor is exceedingly busy with the conduct of his Researches. Yet, despite his many preoccupations, the doctor was kind enough to grant me some time yesterday and it is in order to communicate his advice that I have now picked up my quill to write to you.
You will no doubt be interested to learn that your
Condition is one of the principal areas of inquiry in modern medicine: it has come to be recognized as one of the chief causes of human debility. It is thought that the costs of the Disease, physical and economic, are of such magnitude that the Nation that first conquers it will thereby secure its position as the world's Dominant Power. You can imagine then the urgency with which a remedy is being sought â yet, despite the best efforts of a great number of Doctors and Men of Science, there has as yet been little Progress. Dr Allgood assures me that there is every reason to hope that a Cure â perhaps even a Vaccination â will soon be found, but alas, none has yet been discovered. This was of course, a great disappointment, for I had hoped that he would be able to prescribe some soothing Tonics, Drugs or Poultices to help in combating the Seizures â but it appears that at present the best hope of effecting a cure lies in educating Patients and making sure that they become fully cognizant of the terrible consequences of this Disease.
This being the prescribed mode of treatment, I shall endeavour to obtain books and other materials for you. Enclosed herewith you will find the first volume in your proposed course of Study. Bookmarks have been inserted in the chapters that particularly require your attention, and I urge you to commit these passages to memory. The Doctor says that it is most necessary in such courses of Study, that occasional Tests and Examinations be administered to make sure that the Patient has fully absorbed the prescribed lessons. To that end I will endeavour to arrange a private meeting to test you on your progress.
In concluding this missive, I urge you not to lose hope: while it is undoubtedly true that the road ahead is long and arduous there is every reason to believe that with perseverance, faith and resolve you will succeed in finding your way to a Cure. And you should know that you are not alone â I will do everything in my power to speed you on your Path.
Yours & c.
C. Burnham
p.s. In order to preserve the confidentiality of our Collaboration it may be best to destroy this note immediately.
The book that accompanied the note was called
Elements of Physiology
and it was by a professor of medicine at the University of Paris, one Anthelme Balthasar Richerand. It was a weighty tome, but fortunately the sections recommended for Zachary's scrutiny were quite short and had been clearly bookmarked.
The first of these chapters was a detailed study of the case of a fifteen-year-old shepherd boy in France who
became addicted to onanism, and to such a degree, as to
practise it seven or eight times in a day. Emission
became at last so difficult that he would strive for an
hour, and then discharge only a few drops of blood. At
the age of six and twenty, his hand became insufficient,
all he could do, was to keep the penis in a continual
state of priapism. He then bethought himself of tickling
the internal part of his urethra, by means of a bit of
wood six inches long, and he would spend in that occupation,
several hours, while tending his flock in the
solitude of the mountains. By a continuance of this
titillation for sixteen years, the canal of the urethra
became hard, callous, and insensible â¦
Chills of dread and horror shot through Zachary as he read on to the study's sickening conclusion in which the unfortunate shepherd's much-abused organ had split into two longitudinal halves, like an over-grilled sausage. Despite the best efforts of the doctors at the hospital in Narbonne, the shepherd had died shortly afterwards.
Scarcely had Zachary recovered from the nightmares evoked by this passage than another parcel arrived, accompanied by another note.
October 14, 1839
Dear Mr Reid
I have just this minute returned from one of Dr Allgood's Lectures on the Affliction to which you have fallen victim: it was perhaps the most moving that I have yet heard. In the conquest of this disease, says Dr Allgood, lies the difference between primitive and modern Man. All modern philosophers are agreed upon this he said, and he quoted at length from one Mr Kant who is said to be the most Enlightened thinker of the Age. I felt it necessary to make some jottings for your edification.
âThe physical effects are absolutely disastrous,' says the philosopher, âbut the consequences from the moral perspective are even more regrettable. One transgresses the limits of nature, and the desire rages without end, for it never finds any real satisfaction.'
Afterwards Dr Allgood was kind enough to lend me another Book: Mr Sylvester Graham's
Lecture to Young Men on Chastity
. You will find it enclosed herewith. We are very fortunate that Dr Allgood has made this book available to us. It has only very recently been published in America and has already sold many thousands of copies there. Dr Allgood assures me that if any remedy for your Condition could be said to exist then this book is it. I urge you to spend this day and the next in studying it and absorbing its lessons. Your first catechism should, I think, be conducted while the book is still fresh in your mind so I think we should meet the day after the morrow.
As to the venue, I confess that I have been at something of a loss to decide on one â for a Discussion of this nature requires a degree of privacy that is hard to come by in a house that is as plentifully supplied with servants as ours. But at length I have hit upon a stratagem that will, I think, admirably serve the purpose. I have put it about that some of the shelves in my Sewing Room are broken and the nokar-logue have been informed that the Mystery-sahib will be coming to the house to repair them.
Today being Tuesday, I suggest you come to the front door of the house at 11 in the morning on Thursday. One of my maids will show you to my Sewing Room. Of course
you must not neglect to bring your tools with you, and nor must you forget to bring the books that Dr Allgood has so kindly lent us â hundreds of people are clamouring for them, so great is the concern about this Epidemic.
Yours & c.
C. Burnham
p.s.: I enclose with this letter a packet of biscuits made to a recipe by the author of the
Lecture on Chastity
. They are said to be a marvellous antidote for your Disease, and are widely used as such in America, where they are known as âGraham Crackers'.
p.p.s.: needless to add, this note too should be destroyed as soon as it has been read.
Five
H
t didn't take long for Kesri to realize that the Pacheesi was a fiefdom for Bhyro Singh and his clan. Behind the battalion's external edifice of military rank there lay an unseen scaffolding of power, with its own hierarchy and loyalties. This was not just tolerated but even encouraged by the battalion's British officers, who relied on this fraternity to bring in new recruits and to pass on information about the men.