Flying High (25 page)

His father had taught him to be honorable, to work hard, love the Lord and be kind to others. He slipped up occasionally, but he kept that as his creed. If he got socked for it, so be it. He walked into his office to find both his intercom and his answering machine flashing red.

He punched the intercom button first. “Wainwright.”

“Lieutenant McCafferty, Colonel. The Commandant wants to see you. Right now, if possible.”

“On my way.” This could be it. “Well, fellow,” he said as he closed his office door and looked at the brass plate beside it that bore his name and rank, “it’s been a great ride.”

He opened the Commandant’s office door and stopped as his gaze took in the marine whose career he had saved. Finding presence of mind, he saluted his superior officers assembled there.

“You wanted to see me, sir?”

“Yes indeed. You remember Corporal Williams, I’m sure.” Did he ever! He glanced to the left, saw Rupert Holden and wondered at the absence of the man’s smirk.

The Commandant gestured to the marine corporal. “Corporal Williams is receiving a medal of honor for uncommon valor in the heat of battle, for saving the lives of his commanding officer and fellow servicemen. He has asked that you pin the medal on him.”

At Nelson’s inquiring look, the corporal explained, “I was on guard duty and I didn’t tell anyone I had a high fever because there wasn’t anybody to take my place. It got so bad I finally fell asleep, and Colonel Wainwright caught me, woke me up, gave me some water and a lecture but didn’t turn me in.”

The man looked directly at him. “Colonel Wainwright, if you hadn’t showed compassion for me, I would not have had the opportunity to save my comrades. Thank you for doing me the honor of pinning this medal on my uniform.” Nelson didn’t dare look at any of his superiors while he pinned the ribbon on the marine’s jacket.

The Commandant cleared his throat, getting the attention of all present. “Compassion is also a form of valor,” he said, and Nelson allowed himself to breathe.
Thank God that was over!

“This has worried me for a long time,” he said to the elegant man whose shoes he might still someday fill. “Thank you, sir.”

The Commandant surprised him with a wink. “All’s well that ends well, Colonel.”

* * *

Several days later, Nelson received official orders to go to Afghanistan, and immediately set about getting his affairs in order. He postponed telling Audrey until after they had dinner together that same evening.

“Feel like a short walk along the Tidal Basin?” he asked her as they left the Willard Room. He wanted the best setting possible in which to introduce a topic that he knew would displease her.

“I’d love it. The moon’s high and bright tonight. Is this a partial fulfillment of my fantasy?”

“If it works, why not?”

She stopped walking and tugged at his hand. “Nelson, you’ve been on edge all evening. What’s happening? The likelihood of your having to resign no longer exists, and you received your Commandant’s blessing. Our relationship seems to grow sweeter by the day. I expected you to be in a happy, carefree mood. Can I help?”

He couldn’t pretend joviality. “It’s...well, it’s serious. I wasn’t planning to tell you this way—”

“Weren’t planning to tell me
what?
”

The only way to say it was to say it. “I’m scheduled to leave for Afghanistan in ten days, September eighth.”

“
What?
Good Lord, you can’t do that. It’s tantamount to committing suicide. I won’t... Nelson, what are you trying to prove?”

He heard the tears in her voice. Yes, and the sound of horror. He looked down and saw that she wrung her hands.

“Audrey. Don’t. Honey, don’t. For God’s sake, please don’t cry.”

“I’m not going to cry,” she said, sniffing back the tears. “You’re going through with this?”

“I have no choice.”

Her chin jutted out and she poked his chest with her right index finger. “You have a choice. I do not oppose your doing your duty. I wouldn’t respect you if you shirked it, but this goes beyond duty. I want to go home.”

“Audrey, I’ve told you why this is so important to me.”

“Nelson, I’d like to go home. If you don’t want to take me, I’ll hail a taxi.”

He had expected her disapproval, but not such a strong reaction, not an unwillingness to listen to reason. “I’ll take you home.”

Hoping for a sign, any sign, that she would back down or at least concede and accept his right to do as he thought best, he parked in front of her house, cut the motor and turned to her.

“I need to do this, Audrey. I told you I promised my father I’d go all the way to the top. Everything’s in my favor. I’ll only be there for fifteen months, and then—”

He watched, horrified, as her hand unfastened her seat belt and then opened the car door. Unwilling to give up, he got out and walked with her to her door. “This is important to me, Audrey. Please try to understand.”

She didn’t look at him. “Speaking as a physician and an expert in joint diseases and physical therapy, and not as the woman who loves you, you don’t make any sense. Even if you stayed here in Washington, D.C., fifteen more months without medical care and you could be an invalid. One misstep or a fall is all that’s needed. You can’t go to combat duty without medical evaluation and treatment, and if you don’t get it by the seventh of September, I will inform your superiors of your condition.”

He gasped aloud and stepped away from her.
“What did you say?”

She looked him in the eye. “You heard me. I love you too much to allow you to do this. I’d rather lose you than watch you ruin your life.”

“You would betray me?”

“Call it whatever you like.”

For a long minute he stared into the face that was so dear to him, and his heart pained him far more than his neck and shoulders.

“This is where I get off.”

He trudged back to his car, got in and sat there until he could will himself to start the motor and drive home. He headed up the stairs to look in on Ricky as he usually did when he got home, opened the child’s door and gasped.

“Lena!” he yelled, banging on her bedroom door. “Where’s Ricky?”

“Wait a minute. Don’t get out of joint.” She opened the door and peeped at him. “Oh, Colonel, I was asleep. What’s the matter?”

“What’s the matter? Where the devil is Ricky?”

She tightened the robe around her and opened the door wider. “Ricky’s spending the night with Judy Meade. Such an excitement. I wish you’d ’a been here.”

He let the doorjamb take his weight and exhaled a long breath. “How’d that happen?” If he was going to leave Lena with responsibility for the boy, he’d have to trust her judgment.

“You know he went to school Monday, and he’s been talking about this little girl, Judy, till he just about burned a hole in my ears. This afternoon, Mrs. Meade called to tell me Judy was driving her nuts about Ricky and asked if Ricky could visit the child. Meantime, Ricky is here going crazy, so I said all right if she’d come get him. She did, and Mr. Meade brought Ricky home about six-thirty with Judy in the car. Ricky showed Judy the whole house, his room and his precious harp. Then he took her downstairs, and they played the piano.”

She looked to the ceiling and spread her hands as if helpless. “Mr. Meade was in a hurry, but that didn’t bother the children none. He put his foot down, and Judy cried uncontrollably with Ricky trying to comfort her. So I packed a bag for Ricky and sent them back with Mr. Meade. I never thought I’d be glad to see Ricky leave this house without you or me, Colonel, but they were something. Hugging and holding hands and giggling and kissing. I asked Mr. Meade if he didn’t think he should lay the law down to his daughter about being so forward with boys. He laughed a lot about that. I hope you don’t mind.”

“No, I don’t, but from what you said, it looks as if we won’t be seeing much of him in the future. I take it Judy also goes to Price School?”

“Yes. That’s ’bout where you’d expect her to go.”

He went back to his room and closed the door, realizing he’d wanted Ricky to plug up a hole that the child couldn’t fill. His euphoria about the favorable resolution of his having disregarded the rules in Afghanistan and his joy that he and Audrey had finally come together as one were as nothing. Smoke in a windstorm. If she meant to report him, she’d have her chance. He began the task of sorting out his most personal items to be stored for safekeeping, listing each one for Lena’s benefit if he didn’t get back home. Well after midnight, he crawled into bed, limp from struggling with the vicissitudes that were his life, and slept fitfully.

* * *

“I’m not going to suffer about this,” Audrey said to herself as she locked her door. “I can’t in good conscience let him do it. For a short while I was happy, and I’ll be happy again.”

Her answering machine flashed red, and she checked the call with reluctance, knowing that it couldn’t be from Nelson. After sitting down and kicking off her shoes, she returned Winifred’s call.

“Hi, sis. What’s up? I just got in.”

“Hi. I’ve been going nuts waiting for you to get home and call me. Ryan and I are going to get married.”

“What? You’ve known him five weeks! Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”

“Yep. If Mama was living, she’d die if I shacked up with a man, and for me, it’s that or get married. Be happy for me, Audrey. We’re crazy about each other.”

“Still concerned about pleasing him in bed?”

“Good heavens, no. You were right. That was just plain silly. We have no problems with that. He’s a wonderful lover. If I think about it much, I’ll put on my clothes and—”

“You’ll do nothing of the sort. Give the poor guy a chance to miss you.”

“How’s it going with you and the Colonel?”

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “I had a glimpse of heaven, but that’s all I’ll get.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I can’t go into it because I can’t discuss his personal affairs, but I had a decision to make, and it turned him off. It’s over.”

“My Lord, you must be miserable. I’m so sorry. Does Pam know about this?”

“No. It happened a few minutes ago. But don’t worry about me, Wendy, I’m satisfied that I’m doing the right thing. For me, it’s the only way.”

“Well, I’ll be a cross-eyed donkey. I didn’t believe you two would split up, and I have to tell you, I’m disappointed.”

“So am I. When are you getting married?”

“New Year’s Eve. How’s that for style?”

She couldn’t fully enter into her sister’s joy, but she tried for Winifred’s sake. “It’s wonderful. Am I your maid of honor?”

“I’m having both you and Pam. Okay?”

“Very okay. We can talk some more tomorrow.”

“Gee, Audrey. I’m being insensitive, and you’re a loving, giving sister, as usual. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

She hung up, undressed and went to shower. If while showering tears flowed from her eyes, maybe she wouldn’t know it.

* * *

Nelson didn’t fool himself. He knew Audrey had a point, and a good one. But she hadn’t understood what it would mean to him if he could not redeem his father’s sacrifices, his unfulfilled life: a life devoted to caring for the needs of his wife and children, only to lose his wife when she was forty-one, and his own life at the age of fifty-seven before he could realize his dreams. If only Audrey could have stretched her mind to see why he was as he was.

“What do you mean, Unca Nelson? You’re not going to live with Miss Lena and me?” Ricky’s bottom lip drooped, and tears pooled in his eyes. “Can Audie come live with us?”

He had tried for the past hour to explain. Ricky was capable of understanding, but he didn’t want to. “Son, I’ll be back here as soon as my orders allow it. I’ve tried to explain that I’m a serviceman, and I have to go where they send me.”

“Then why can’t I go, too?”

Nelson ran his head over his hair. Try explaining war to a five-year-old. “The Marine Corps won’t let me, son. If I could, I would.”

“Is Mr. Meade a serviceman? Can I go live with Judy?”

“Sorry, son. That’s out of the question. I have to go to work now. Try to understand.”

But Ricky hadn’t understood and had announced, “I’m not going to be a marine. I hate marines!”

“You know I’ll do the best I can for him,” Lena said, “and Lord knows I do thank you for the trouble you’re going to to leave a home for me.” She stunned him by reaching up and kissing his cheek. “The Lord will bless you, and you’ll get back here safely.” She didn’t mention Audrey, for which he was grateful. “I sure do wish you’d change your mind and not go,” she added in a prayerful tone.

Raising his left shoulder in a quick, dismissive shrug that belied his true feelings, he stepped out of his house and headed for his office. Once there, he began studying in preparation for the briefings that would preface his mission to Afghanistan. He had done his best to prepare Ricky for his departure, but didn’t think he’d made a dent in Ricky’s thinking. The boy seemed unable to contemplate a life without him. And Lena wasn’t much better. He opened the manual and began reading.

* * *

A week passed and, neither having heard anything from Audrey nor learned that she’d mentioned the matter of his neck to his superiors, he relaxed and went about his daily work.

The penultimate briefing was held in the conference room of a senior general. Nelson had slept poorly the previous night and was battling fatigue while he took notes and tried to concentrate on the speaker. A door behind him opened and, as did several other officers, he turned to see who had entered. However, the abruptness of his move sent pain searing along his neck and shoulders, and he grabbed his neck with his left hand. Realizing what he’d done, he tried to recover and turn back to face the general who stood before them, but couldn’t. Such excruciating pain gripped him that he closed his eyes and gritted his teeth.

Two senior officers attempted to help him, questioning him as to the source of his problem and, unable to move his head without enormous pain, he had no choice but to admit the truth.

* * *

“I’m surprised you came,” he said to Audrey when he awoke to see her sitting beside his bed. “How long have I been here and what is this thing they’ve harnessed me into?”