For Better or Hearse (19 page)

“Where have you been, Annabelle?” Kate rushed me as Richard and I stepped out of the Park Hyatt's elevator onto the ballroom level. Groomsmen in black tuxedos clustered by the door of the ballroom, handing out programs, and the familiar sounds of a string quartet came from inside. “It's ten minutes until they walk down the aisle, and we're missing a mother of the groom.”

“I got here as fast as I could,” I said as I appraised the setup. A towering glass vase of green viburnum dominated a round table in the foyer and made me do a double take. The Mighty Morphin Flower Arrangers had blown me away again. “Richard had to get stitches and wouldn't let me leave him.”

“An exaggeration,” Richard spluttered. “But I would think that my life would be a little more important than yet another wedding.”

“Stitches?” Kate looked at Richard's shirt and her mouth dropped open.

Richard lowered his voice and made sure no guests were within earshot. “I was stabbed.”

“By Jean?” Kate asked.

“No, by Darcy.” Richard was relishing every moment of this. “Turns out she was the brains behind the whole operation. It also turns out that she's Marcello's daughter.”

“Wow.” Kate looked dazed. “I missed a lot.”

“Once we find the missing mother, I'll fill you in,” I assured her, taking the wedding timeline out of her hands and looking at my watch.

“She was here for pictures, and then she went to her room to freshen up her makeup,” Kate said. “Although between you and me if she puts on much more she's going to topple over from the weight of her eye shadow.”

“Is that her?” Richard's eyes were wide as he stared behind me.

I turned around and was almost blinded by the copper crushed lamé dress advancing on me. I hadn't thought it possible to match a dress to a skin tone as perfectly as she had. She was an unnatural shade of burnished orange from her shellacked hair to her talon-like fingernails. The only spots on her body that weren't orange were her turquoise eyelids.

“What's the mother of the bride wearing?” I whispered to Kate.

“Lavender suit. No beads.”

“Have they seen each other?” I hesitated to ask.

Kate nodded. “It wasn't pretty.”

“This is better than reality TV,” Richard said.

“Well, girls.” The groom's mother tapped her watch. “Looks like it's showtime. Come on, Harold.” Her husband shuffled behind her toward the ballroom.

“What happened to the grandfather?” I'd expected to see the geriatric Don Juan permanently attached to Kate.

“I had him seated early.” Kate smiled mischievously. “To give him more time to get down the aisle.”

I patted her on the shoulder. “Good thinking.”

“Do you want to get the bridesmaids lined up while I deal with the moms and cue the—” I stopped in mid-sentence as I saw Leatrice, Ian, and Reese get off the elevator. “What are you doing here? All of you?”

Reese rolled his eyes. “I found these two snooping around the Fairmont.”

Leatrice nodded eagerly. “Ian and I heard about the latest accident at the Fairmont on my police scanner and he wanted to come down and see what happened.”

“We can't have them messing up our crime scene, but I recognized your neighbor right away.” The side of Reese's mouth quivered until he could no longer suppress a grin. “When I mentioned that you were over here, they insisted on coming to see you.”

“How thoughtful of you.” I hoped he didn't miss my sarcasm.

Ian stepped in close to me and took my hand into both of his. “We heard what happened. Are you all right?”

My mouth went dry as I tried to speak. I didn't know which man made me more nervous, but I definitely couldn't handle them together.

Richard sighed. “Oh for heaven's sake, she's fine. I'm the one who nearly died.”

“Did you now?” Leatrice bounced over to Richard, the penguins on her sweater jiggling. “Is that blood?”

Reese cleared his throat to get my attention. “I also thought I'd tell you that I got a call from the station.
Jean finally confessed to the murders and to Darcy's part in them. Apparently she was the one who managed to lift the video tape when she was giving a statement at the station.”

“So she was the one giving you evidence against Georgia that day? She must have overheard us talking about the video of the murder.” I tried to keep my voice steady and sound professional. “I'm glad everything turned out okay.”

Reese looked at my hands clasped in Ian's, and then met my eyes for a brief moment. “I have to get back to the crime scene. Try to stay out of trouble from now on, okay, Annabelle?”

I took a tiny step back from Ian, whose gaze was now focused on Reese. I didn't want Reese to think that Ian and I were a couple when we hadn't even gone out yet, but I didn't want Ian to think that I had a thing for the detective, either. I didn't know what I wanted, but I definitely needed an aspirin from my emergency kit.

“The detective knows you pretty well, eh?” Ian said, loosening his grip on my hands.

I could feel my face getting warm. “We've worked together before, that's all.”

“Some people have a hard time staying out of trouble,” Richard said under his breath, looking pointedly at me as Reese got back on the elevator. “Especially when they juggle too much at one time.”

I gave Richard a kick in the shins and felt better when he yelped in pain.

“What time is it?” Kate pulled my hands away from Ian to look at my watch. “We only have three minutes.”

I flipped a page in the timeline to bring me to the ceremony page. “Sorry to rush off, guys, but we have to get a bride down the aisle.”

“Well, that's another thing.” Kate avoided my eyes. “The bride is…um, here, see for yourself.”

She pulled me by the elbow down the hall to the junior ballroom, with Richard, Leatrice, and Ian trailing behind. The small ballroom had been sectioned off and set up as a holding room for the bridal party. Fern sat in the midst of the celadon-clad bridesmaids dispensing dubious sex advice. The bride wore a dazed smile on her face and looked like she was on the verge of slipping off her chair.

“Is she drunk?” I hissed at Kate.

“I'd say she's snockered,” Ian said Fern jumped up from his chair and ran over to me. “Annabelle! Don't they all look gorgeous? I mean for a bunch of tramps, of course.” He burst into laughter, and all the girls joined him.

I had to live vicariously through Fern's insults. Just once I'd like to be able to call a bridesmaid a tramp and live to tell the tale.

I noticed Fern's glassy eyes. “How much champagne did you all have?”

“Oh, it wasn't the champagne that relaxed everyone.” Fern cupped his hand and leaned close to my ear. “It was the Valium I crushed up in it that really took the edge off Nadine.”

“I've always wanted to try Valium.” Leatrice eyed the empty glasses. “I hear it's coming back into fashion.”

Sometimes I really wondered where Leatrice got her information.

“You drugged the bride?” I rubbed my temples. Darcy had been a piece of cake compared to this.

“How much did you have?” Richard asked Fern as he watched him lean against the wall with one arm.

“Only a teensy slip or two.” Fern slid down the wall to the floor.

I stepped over Fern and walked over to Nadine, shaking her by the shoulders. “It's time to get married.”

Nadine raised her head and gave me a huge vacant smile. “Congratulations.”

I pulled her up by her arms and propped her against me. “No, Nadine. You're getting married, remember?”

“If you think I should,” she slurred.

At least they weren't reciting their own vows, I reminded myself.

“Bridesmaids line up in the order we rehearsed,” Kate called from the door in her best drill sergeant voice. “Don't forget your bouquets.”

The girls shuffled into line and followed Kate out the door. I grabbed Nadine's bouquet off the table and handed it to Richard as I tried to walk her into the lobby.

Richard stared at the green pod bouquet. “What on earth…?”

I held up a hand. “Don't ask.”

“This is so exciting.” Leatrice clapped her hands. “What can I do?”

“Grab her train so it doesn't get all twisted,” I instructed, motioning to the back of Nadine's cathedral-length dress.

“Let me give you a hand with her.” Ian winked at me as he took the other side of the sagging bride. “This isn't how I imagined spending time with you, but it's not so bad.”

“I'm really sorry that I was out when you came by last night.” I tried to keep my voice low so Richard wouldn't overhear. “Kate and I got stuck at work.”

Ian gave me a playfully suspicious look. “So you weren't out with another fellow?”

I shook my head and felt my cheeks start to warm.

“I told him that I'd be shocked if you were on a date,” Leatrice chimed in.

“Thanks.” I turned to shoot daggers at Leatrice, who happily hummed “The Wedding March” as we lurched down the hall. I said a prayer of thanks that the mother of the bride had already been seated and couldn't see the motley crew dragging her daughter down the hall.

When we reached the doorway to the ballroom, Kate was sending the maid of honor down the aisle. She closed the ballroom doors, and I passed the bride off to her startled father, pulling the blusher over her face. Kate and I each held one of the door handles and waited for the music to change while Richard placed the bouquet in the bride's hand.

“Go slow,” I whispered to Nadine's father as the trumpet began the processional fanfare and Leatrice unfurled the train behind them.

Kate and I threw open the double doors simultaneously and watched the bride and her father shuffle diagonally down the aisle before we closed the ballroom doors behind them. I slumped against the door.

Ian leaned next to me. “Boy, your weddings sure are something special. Dead bodies, drunk brides—”

I elbowed him lightly. “Hey, all our weddings aren't like this.”

“Sometimes there are drunks
and
dead bodies,” Richard said, smirking at me.

“I wouldn't mind being a wedding planner.” Leatrice stood on her tiptoes to look through the peephole in the ballroom door. “And I'll bet it's even easier when the bride is awake.”

“Not always.” Between confronting a murderer and getting a doped-up bride down the aisle, I felt like crawling in bed for a week.

“That wasn't so bad,” Kate said. “Why didn't we think of sedating our brides before, huh?”

Richard stared at Kate. “Because it's illegal?”

“You know what they say.” Kate grinned. “All's bare in love and war.”