For the Love of Lila (30 page)

“Yes. For you.” He grinned.

He truly has lost his mind
, she thought. How could he be smiling under such circumstances? The unbridled hope in his expression tempted her own heart to lift, but she chided herself. What hope could there possibly be?

Lifting his briefcase onto the bench in front of the vanity, he pulled out some papers. “I have something very important to show you.”

“Tristan, this is my
bedchamber
. What if your sister stops in to check on me?” As her senses returned, she realized she needed to do something at once, before they were discovered. She stepped closer to him and got a whiff of whiskey. “Good Lord! You’ve been drinking. I have to get you out of here.”

She grabbed his arm to steer him toward the door, but he resisted her efforts, too large for her to budge.

“No, no, Lila, wait.” Gently prying her fingers away with his free hand, he closed his own around them. “‘Tis true, I was drinking earlier, but I haven’t had a drop for hours. If I still smell like a distillery, I apologize. Please, just listen to me for a moment.” He lifted the documents he held, apparently about to address them.

“For heaven’s sake, we can go over my trust in the
parlor
.” She tugged on his hand. “Now, come on. You must smuggle yourself back downstairs.”

“This isn’t about the trust.” He glanced at the papers. “Well, not entirely, anyway.”

“Tristan, if you get caught in here, we’ll be completely exposed—at the mercy of whomever discovers us and all of the others they tell. Do you understand what that would mean for us? The jig would be up, well and truly.”

“The jig is up anyway, Lila.”

She stopped pulling and looked into his eyes. They were dark and stripped of amusement. “What do you mean?”

“My sister saw us on the terrace this morning.” His lips tightened into a grimace. “Neither you nor I thought to check the upstairs windows before our last little indiscretion. After I left you in the kitchen with Cook, Hester stopped me and gave me an earful.”

“Oh, God.” She dropped his hand and slapped both of her palms on her cheeks. Her face felt hot. If Hester told anyone about Tristan and her, his chances for the career he wanted would amount to nothing. Was it possible to swear Hester to secrecy? Was it even fair to ask? How could she and Tristan ever explain their positions or excuse their behavior?

In all of her life, Lila had never felt so mortified. She turned toward the bed, then swung around to look at him. “We’ll have to tell her it was the first time—a single impropriety that we vow not to repeat.”

He shook his head. “I tried that. She rejected it out of hand.”

“Oh, no.” She flopped down on the mattress. Her brain teemed with disjointed thoughts. “Oh, no. What are we going to do? How can we make this right?”

“That’s what I’m here to discuss.”

She felt almost dizzy. Why had she ever swayed him to kiss her this morning? She had finally pushed their luck too far, and in her condition she didn’t have the strength of mind to work a way out of this mire.

“Oh, Tristan.” She hid her face in her hands. “I’m afraid I can’t cope with this. In the state I’m in, I don’t believe I can manage one more prevarication. Whatever plan you may have, I fear I don’t have the will to carry it out.”

“How about marrying me?”

She looked up at him. He gave her another wavering smile, and her heart jumped, pounding against her breastbone. Her instinct was to spring up into his arms—but she held back, trying to give her brain a chance to present its case. Unfortunately, any sense she once had was overpowered by her need for him and fear of being without him. She sat mute, her lower lip quivering.

Stooping down in front of her, he touched one finger to her mouth. He wet his lips, obviously nervous. “Before you say no, I need to explain exactly what I have in mind. Don’t mistake my kneeling as an indication that I’m begging you to forsake your principles. I would never ask that of you. On the contrary, I’m hoping you and I can set an example of what a fair life-partnership should be.”

The sight of him kneeling before her unnerved her so much she could barely take in his words. She blinked back tears. “I’m sorry. I don’t understand.”

“That’s fine.” Still holding the documents he’d removed from his briefcase, he used his other hand to brush her cheek. “I want you to take your time and think about this. What I’ve done is prepare a special marriage contract that allows you complete equity in our relationship.”

As he glanced down at the papers once more, a seed of comprehension took root in her mind. “That is a
marriage contract
?”

He nodded and grinned. “A unique one, I believe. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before. This agreement, if you choose to sign it, will allow you to retain control of the assets you bring into our marriage, as well as any money you earn or otherwise gain while we’re together. You will have equal rights to whatever children we should have. If we ever parted—which I would never willingly do—neither of us could deny the other access to our children.”

A lump swelled in her throat. She could hardly believe any man would do this, especially for her. He truly had to be the most wonderful male on earth. “Oh, Tristan, I’m touched—amazed, even.”

“It’s more important for you to be satisfied. I expect you to review each clause carefully and let me know if you have doubts whatsoever.”

“I will, though I can tell you already that I have no doubts.” She could no longer hold back her feelings. Her tears welled up and spilled down her cheeks.

He grinned. “Does that mean you’ll accept my proposal?”

“Oh, yes—but wait.” Suddenly she remembered the baby. Her pregnancy would ruin everything! Once it became apparent that she was with child, someone in London would be bound to calculate the months and start rumors. Tristan’s career would be put in jeopardy after all. She should have realized his plan was too good to work. “Blast it! You don’t know everything.”

“If you’re willing to marry me, nothing else matters.” He gazed at her with such passion in his eyes that she wanted to melt under the warmth.

“I only wish that were true.” She looked down at the bedspread, unable to face the disappointment that would wipe away his smile when he heard the news. Her chest tightened, and she could barely bring herself to speak. “Good Lord, I don’t even know how to tell you.”

“Lila.” He cleared his throat. “I think I may already have an inkling of the matter you’re reluctant to broach. Is it true, then, that you’re...that you’re with child?”

She shot a look at him, astonished. “You know? But how could you? I myself didn’t come to realize what was happening until last night.”

“Hester figured it out. I have no idea how.”

“Oh, dear.
I
know how.” The heat of embarrassment flooded her body. “She and I were together when the truth dawned on me. I must have been quite transparent. Goodness, what must she think of me?”

“Actually, I believe it’s
me
she blames.” He gave her a half-smile. “She likely presumes that I took advantage of a woman in a vulnerable situation.”

“Oh, no. Oh, no.” She put her hand to her forehead, then forced herself to look him squarely in the eyes. “Well, you must see that your plan is of no use. If I stayed here, when the baby came early, all of London would know that we conceived the child out of wedlock. Your reputation would be ruined. I’ll have to go away and have the babe in secret. Surely Hester will agree to keep quiet about the affair. Your sister can be counted on to protect your name, can she not?”

His eyes had widened during her speech, and he shook his head as she finished. “Dear Lila, in some ways you are so naive. Once you and I are married, the London
ton
will consider an early baby a mere peccadillo. It will be a nine days wonder, and then everyone will forget it...forever.”

She frowned. “I don’t travel much in society...perhaps you’re right that many people—younger ones, at least—would shrug this off. But what about someone such as your father? Did you not once tell me that he is the one who has the most say about your political career?”

To her amazement, a crooked grin tugged at his lips. “This was my father’s idea.”

“What was?”

“The marriage contract.”

She gaped. “You told your father about us...about the baby—everything?”

His smile faded. “No. Hester did, which is something I’ll take up with her later. Not that I can say much to her in the end, I suppose. When I wouldn’t discuss the matter with her, she insisted I needed counsel from someone. As it turns out, she was right.”

“But your father knows that you and I have been...that we’re expecting a child?” Warmth crept up her neck and into her face. “Oh, God, how mortifying. And, more to the point, don’t you believe he’ll react by banishing you to some remote corner of the kingdom? Certainly after this he won’t be likely to further your political career. Oh, Tristan, I am so sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He set down the marriage contract on the floor and took both of her hands in his. “The fact is that the esteemed viscount himself brought up the matter of my career. He suggested it was time to look into a seat in the House of Commons, now that I’m to be a ‘family man.’“

“Honestly?” The burning in her face began to subside. His smile encouraged her. A hint of hope lightened the weight hanging around her heart. “He’s willing to accept that we began this relationship out of wedlock?”

He nodded, his grin widening. “Indeed. In fact, once he’d found out I was willing to do right by you, he seemed rather impressed that I’d contrived to lure a well-bred young woman into my bed without benefit of marriage.”

She felt herself begin to blush again, then she dismissed his comment as a joke. Waving a hand at him, she said, “Oh, you’re jesting. Surely you must be jesting.”

He only lifted an eyebrow.

Well, maybe he had been serious, but as the realization sunk in that their troubles had ended, she laughed out loud with sheer giddiness. “My God, Tristan, this means we can be
together
. We really can spend every day with each other, sleep with each other every night—without ever having to hide our love from the rest of the world.”

He nodded and gave her a serious look. “But only if you’re truly satisfied with the marriage contract and the plan as a whole. I would never want you to feel that I’ve enslaved you by coercing you into marriage.”

“Oh, Tristan. Don’t be daft. You haven’t enslaved me. On the contrary, you’ve set me free...free to do exactly what I want to do—to love you, openly and proudly.”

He smiled at her more broadly than ever. Leaning forward, he kissed her soundly on the mouth.

The next instant a knock at the door startled them both. They jumped apart and straightened their backs, staring at each other with wide eyes.

“Yes?” Lila rasped to the unseen visitor.

A throat cleared from the other side of the door. Hester’s voice seeped through the crack in a stage whisper. “You’re going to have to come downstairs—the both of you. Er...I saw Tristan enter ten minutes ago.”

Tristan sprang up and went to the door, unlocking it and flinging it open. He gave his sister a brilliant smile. “Lila and I are going to be married.”

“Oh, thank heaven!” She clapped her hand over her bosom. Her eyes immediately glistened with tears. “I knew you would work matters out. That’s why I didn’t stop you from meeting in here. Congratulations.” She turned to Lila and smiled. “My best wishes, dear. He will be a good husband. He has always been a darling.”

“You didn’t think so this morning,” he muttered, but his eyes twinkled with indisputable happiness.

Lila rose from the bed and walked up to her future sister-in-law. “I’m sorry to have put you through such a strain, especially when you’re...” She paused, glanced at Tristan, and then looked back at her hostess. Perhaps Hester wasn’t ready to discuss her pregnancy. “What I mean is that we never intended to be such a burden. We had a few wrinkles to smooth out between us, and we didn’t know how to do it. Fortunately, your father is wiser than we are.”

“That reminds me why I interrupted,” Hester said, looking to her brother. “Our parents will be here within the hour. Poinsett and I just received a message from Mother. I don’t know what Father told her, but she writes that she can’t wait any longer to meet your bride.”

“Oh, dear,” Lila said. At first she felt abashed about what might have been said about her; the next moment she decided she was too happy to worry. She had Tristan. That was what mattered most. And the match had his father’s approval. Though she didn’t know what the viscountess might think of the affair, she vowed she would do her best to prove herself to the woman who would become the only mother she had.

“Well, let me get out of your way,” Hester said. “Just try to be downstairs in a quarter of an hour or so. Again, my congratulations.”

She ducked out of the door and closed it behind her before Lila could reply.

When she looked to Tristan he was watching her, his brow furrowed. “Is it too much for you to meet my parents today? If so, I can tell them as much. You’ve had a lot to bear in the last twenty-four hours, and in your condition you should be resting.”

She smiled and took his hand. “No, I will be fine. Now that I know you and I can be together, I’m prepared to take on the world.”

“Very well.” He turned to face her and folded his arms around her. “But perhaps we could start with England and move slowly from here. I think I’ve had enough of traveling for the time being.”

“Oh, I quite agree.” She snuggled up to his chest, feeling warm and content. “I won’t be seeking much of a wedding journey, maybe just some picnicking in the Cotswolds. After all, we needn’t go all the way to France when we can concoct our own
torte d’amour
. ...Perhaps someday in the future we’ll visit Felicity in Italy.”

“In the
distant
future, I hope,” he said, “when we’re all too old to be scandalized. I suppose, in a way, we have your cousin to thank for the role she played in the quandary that eventually landed us here. But, frankly, her lifestyle frightens me. She’s so wild. I’d be afraid that next time we’re with her, she might somehow endanger us.”