Forever Lost: Becoming Elena - Book Two (10 page)

He didn’t say anything, just lifted his phone and typed something in it before putting it back away.

“Now you will learn what happens when you truly displease me,” he said.

He took her arm again and led her from the room. Elena knew, as he pulled her from the house, she might have pushed her tantrum too far.

She was thrust into the car, and it pulled away without Dalton in it; she felt tears streaking down her cheeks. She had defied him after she’d promised to bend to his will. And as she realized he might be sending her away, her emotions toppled over, and she fought the surge of sorrow that wanted to overtake her.

She couldn’t do this on her own. There was no way she could trudge through the flurry of emotions within her without Dalton’s help. And she might have just ended that.

Long after she was taken to her room and locked inside, Elena wept as she curled into a ball in the center of her bed. Too much — it was all too much.

A
week went by
with no word from Dalton. Elena sat in her room, her meals brought to her and nothing else. The maid came in got her dirty clothes and returned with clean ones. She had no books, no music, nothing.

It was torture.

When she’d first come to this place, she would have loved alone time — for everyone to leave her alone. Now, she wasn’t used to being on her own for long. She needed people — she needed Dalton.

But she’d displeased him.

After another week passed, she thought she would surely go out of her mind. The seclusion he was torturing her with was far worse than anything else he could possibly do. She started eating minimally. She just didn’t have the desire to do anything, even something as simple as putting food into her mouth.

When the maid came in at the end of two weeks and told her she could go out of her room, Elena’s heart raced. Finally!

But then she was told she couldn’t go to Dalton’s room; he didn’t wish to see her. Fine. She didn’t care. Or so she thought.

Two weeks turned into a month, and Elena wondered what she was still doing at Dalton’s home. He obviously was done with her. But she had nowhere to go. And the thought of leaving hurt her more than she would ever admit.

The worse part was how much she missed the man. Things had actually started to get better. He’d allowed her to sleep in his bed, and she missed that, missed him so much more than she ever though possible.

Sitting out in the garden, she slowly peeled the petals from a daisy as she sat back in a chair, her book set aside, her eyes stinging with the need to shed tears. What was she going to do?

“Good afternoon, Elena.”

The greeting startled her so much she dropped the flower she’d been butchering as she turned to see Lincoln approaching, an envelope in his hand, his expression serious. A shiver ran down her back as he came and sat down across from her.

It had been so long since anyone had addressed her that it took her a moment to even respond.

“Hi, Lincoln,” she finally said, her voice slightly scratchy. When was the last time she’d even spoken? She couldn’t remember.

“How are you feeling today?”

She blankly looked at him as she turned his words over in her mind. How was she feeling? She really couldn’t answer his question honestly because she had no idea. She felt as if she were drifting through a dark tunnel with no light in sight, but that wasn’t an acceptable answer. She chose to say nothing, just sat there and looked at him.

“I guess that answers my question,” he said with an understanding look that nearly had her breaking down before him.

Somehow she managed to hold it together as she waited to see his purpose in seeking her out. There was a reason, and she had a feeling it wasn’t a good one.

“As you know, Dalton has been unhappy with you,” Lincoln began. Elena couldn’t help but cringe at his words.

“Yes, I know,” she said, her voice sounding so small.

“You look pretty miserable yourself,” he pointed out.

“I am,” she admitted.

“You have a choice to make,” he told her before holding out the envelope to her. She gingerly took it, but she didn’t open it.

The large manila envelope was heavier than she’d thought it would be. She twisted it in her fingers and waited for Lincoln to go on. He didn’t make her wait long.

“If you’re unhappy, you can do something about it. I know none of this has been easy for you, but this has become your home. In the envelope, though, you will find an ID, a bus ticket to Chicago, and money for starting over. There’s an apartment there already set up. You can choose to leave,” he told her.

Elena’s heart sunk at his words. Dalton was kicking her out. Why Elena hadn’t thought he would do that, she didn’t know. She’d thought about leaving, but with nowhere to go, that idea had fizzled.

Now, in her hands, she had the means to do exactly that, and all she felt was panic at the thought. Maybe if she gave herself some time to think about it, she would feel better.

“Your other option is to stay. But if you do, Dalton has been very specific about what he wants,” Lincoln told her.

He didn’t elaborate, didn’t go into detail about what Dalton wanted from her, but Elena already knew. She was surprised she was even getting another chance, to tell the truth.

“What exactly does he want from me?” she asked, even though she knew. Maybe she just needed to hear the words again. Honestly she didn’t know.

Elena couldn’t interpret the look in Lincoln’s eyes. She wondered what he thought about her. That was new. She hadn’t cared to think what anyone else in the household had thought about her in a long time, not since she’d been so broken.

“There’s a note in the envelope. But basically, he wants the fighting to stop. He said there will be no more chances.” Lincoln cringed just the slightest bit as he said these words.

Elena didn’t even blink. It had been what she was expecting.

Lincoln stood up and took a few steps before he turned toward her, his eyes flashing as if he was dealing with an internal battle. Finally, he sighed and took a step toward her and then stopped again.

“You are stronger than you realize, Elena. I hope someday you will see yourself,” he said, turning again and walking a few steps away. He stopped and faced her once more. “Take the day to think about this. Don’t make any quick decisions. You have more choices now. Choose wisely.”

With that he walked away, not stopping this time.

Elena stared at the envelope, unwilling to open it. She did have a choice to make. She knew what she should do, but she wasn’t sure she was as strong as Lincoln seemed to think she was. Was he telling her to take the money and walk away? Or was he telling her to submit? She honestly didn’t know.

Even though Lincoln had spoken with her on several occasions, she didn’t know how to read the man. Apparently she didn’t know how to read any man. She hadn’t exactly been the best judge of character to date.

She knew how broken she was. So much had happened in her life, and only with Dalton did she feel even the remotest possibility of getting better. She sat in the garden a few more hours, the envelope never once leaving her hands.

She finally got up and went to her room, sat on her bed, and only then did she break the seal on the envelope before spilling the contents out on her bed.

Picking up the ID, she looked down at the picture of her — that was why she’d had to sit in front of a blue screen a few months back. It had the name Elena Robinson on it. It looked like she’d been given a last name.

There was a date of birth, weight, height, hair and eye color. But this wasn’t her. Or was it? She wasn’t the same girl who had been sold so many years before. She was a new person — a new woman. She wasn’t sure how Dalton had managed to get her a completely new identity, but she’d been reborn. And still, she felt nothing.

The bus ticket was dated tomorrow. She could take the cash — what appeared to be several thousand dollars — her new identity, and bus ticket and could fade away into the night if that was what she wanted.

She was sure Dalton would never think of her again. The pang that sent through her was almost more than she could bear. But wouldn’t that be what was best for her? She honestly didn’t know.

Hours later Elena made her decision. Hell, she’d known her decision from the moment Lincoln had handed her the envelope. But she still had time, she assured herself.

The best thing she could do was to sleep on it.

So Elena safely tucked away her envelope of freedom and climbed into bed, her mind spinning. She lay down for a nap, her mind blank as she closed her eyes. Soon she would inform Dalton of her choice. For now, she would just let it all fade away.

E
lena slipped the
slat beneath the sink back into place, feeling much better with her envelope of freedom tucked away where hopefully no one would be able to find it. If Dalton asked her about it, she would plead ignorance.

She was submitting to him. She was going to do whatever he demanded of her, but having that safety net within her reach was the only thing holding her in place. She couldn’t relinquish it, now that it had been handed to her.

Dressing in a pale blue skirt and white sleeveless blouse, Elena took extra care with her hair and makeup, sitting at her vanity, scrutinizing herself in the mirror. The eyes that gazed back at her were dead — or almost dead.

For a few short weeks, possibly an entire month, a bit of a sparkle had come to her eyes. She’d felt safe and cared for. But that didn’t seem to be what Dalton wanted her to feel. If it was, he wouldn’t be pulling the rug out from under her. Just because she had made the decision to stay with him, it didn’t change how much she was hurting.

Elena would soon find out how refined her acting skills had become. Dalton knew she was going to him. He was waiting. Elena stood up and went to her bedroom door. She knew he wouldn’t wait long. No one made him wait — especially her.

No one was in the hall as she quietly passed through, and then she paused in front of his door, her heart pounding with adrenaline as she fought bile from rising into her throat.

Was she making the right choice?

Elena didn’t think she was. But she also didn’t think she was capable of making any other choice. She truly did belong to him. Telling him that was merely a formality.

She knocked. Then she waited . . . and waited.

Dalton was demonstrating his time was all that mattered. She knew he was in there, no doubt about it. But he could make her stand before his door for hours if he chose. If she walked away in irritation there wouldn’t be another chance, and they both knew it.

So she stood there, her legs trembling as she fought the despair wanting to pull her under. How had one walk on a crisp, cool evening changed her life so dramatically? How had her mother’s bad decisions been paid for with the rest of Elena’s life?

It wasn’t Elena’s life that had been affected by her mother’s decisions. Elena had no mother — had no family. It was Mary who had paid the price, Mary who had died that night so many years ago.

Elena had been born from that tragedy, and Elena would be the one to choose a new fate if she ever gained the courage to do just that.

For now, it was Elena who stood waiting in front of Dalton’s bedroom door. She heard his footsteps, heard his muffled words through the door. She couldn’t tell what he was saying, but he wanted her to know he was in there, that he was aware she was outside his door, and that she could continue waiting for him.

After about fifteen minutes, the door finally opened, and Elena had to look quickly to the floor to hide her shock. She composed her features and then looked up again, her face blank.

It was Darcy who had answered. The woman held an almost sympathetic look in her eyes, making Elena feel even worse about herself. But at least Darcy wasn’t glaring at her or worse, gloating. She simply held the door wide open, not bothering with inviting Elena in. They both knew Elena would step through the door.

Dalton was sitting in his large chair, his foot resting on his knee as he leaned back, a drink in his hand, his face blank. She had no idea what the man was thinking, or what he’d been doing.

Did it even matter what Elena had to say to him? Or had he already replaced her with this elegant woman before her? There was no more jealousy within Elena, just a deep-rooted sadness that wouldn’t let go.

Slowly, Elena approached Dalton, and even though the woman was right behind her, Elena fell to her knees and hung her head. She didn’t need to speak words to tell Dalton what her decision was. She just needed to show her submission.

No one spoke as she remained kneeling in front of him, her heart broken, her mind emptied, and her soul shredded apart.

He’d promised to fix her. Maybe this was all part of it. Maybe she needed to be ripped to shreds before she was able to find the pieces and put them back together again. She didn’t know. All she knew for certain was she couldn’t let him go yet.

“You’ve decided to stay.”

The words when they were finally spoken were said without any inflection to let her know how he felt about her decision. It wasn’t a question, but a statement, and Elena wished she could look up and see how he felt about it.

She didn’t switch her position though, just nodded her head.

“Good. We will see if you’re willing to do what it takes to please me again,” he said. “You may look at me now.”

The sad thing was she didn’t even feel the bitterness she should have felt at his statement. That’s how broken she truly was. She didn’t hesitate to lift her head and look up into his cold, dark eyes.

“I want you to meet me in the cave in thirty minutes.”

That was the end of their conversation. He had won. She was his to do with what he wanted, and she had a feeling that what he wanted was going to cost her greatly.

It appeared she was worthless enough to take it all without a fight.

W
alking down the
hallway that led to Elena’s least favorite room, she felt as if she were shackled, being led down the longest mile. It didn’t matter that she was doing this of her own free will, or what free will she still had left.

It didn’t matter that guards weren’t accompanying her or she wasn’t cuffed, at least not yet. All that mattered was she knew her life was about to make another drastic change, and there wasn’t anything she could to do about it.

Stopping outside the door, she lifted her hand and ran her fingers down the grain of the solid wood. Once she stepped through those doors, she knew there was absolutely no turning back.

A lot of choices had been taken from her in the last five years of her life. But when she was left with a decision to make, she knew she was making the wrong one. Maybe it was because she’d been trained so thoroughly, or maybe it was because she didn’t have the confidence to survive on her own. Either way she was making a bad decision.

Elena couldn’t turn back. No matter how much her mind screamed at her to walk back to her room, grab that envelope that allowed her a new life, and set herself free, she still couldn’t make the decision that would make her part ways with Dalton.

She just wasn’t at that place in her life yet.

Of course, she never would be in that place if she didn’t do something to make a change. Then again, today was not the day. She just wasn’t ready.

So finally, her drifting fingers lifted and she rested them for a moment on the coolness of the door handle. Closing her eyes for only the briefest of moments, she took a calming breath and pushed the knob, the door easily swinging open.

A woman was sitting on the bed, wearing next to nothing, her long slim legs crossed, showing the toned curve of her hip and ass. Elena gulped, wondering what the stranger was doing in the room and why she was dressed so scantily.

Elena turned to see Dalton standing several feet away, leaning against a cabinet. Both of their eyes were on Elena — judging her, seeing what her reaction would be.

That was an easy one. It was confusion. She didn’t understand what was going on. Was Dalton going to make Elena watch while he made love to another woman? That would be the ultimate punishment, she decided.

And punishment is what he felt she deserved for what she’d done to him. He wasn’t willing to forgive her so easily, and this was him letting her know that.

“Take a seat, Elena,” Dalton told her.

Elena’s stomach sank as she eyed the chair he enjoyed tying her up in. She wanted to refuse, but hadn’t it been her who had chosen to come, hadn’t it been her who had decided she couldn’t leave him?

She gave herself a few seconds to decide whether she was going to walk back out the door or not. When she knew she couldn’t leave, she moved to the chair. Dalton didn’t hesitate to bind her arms and legs, leaving her bound in a sitting position.

“When I’m not pleased, it makes me do things I might not normally do,” he told her.

There was nothing showing on his face to tell her what he was thinking or how he was feeling. She didn’t know. He leaned in closer to her and Elena hated how much she wanted to feel his lips against hers, how much she needed his touch.

But he got within half an inch before pulling back, not giving her anything she wanted. Then he stood and took off his clothes. She looked down his body, which wasn’t stimulated yet. Even when he wasn’t aroused, Dalton had a beautiful, strong body that she wanted to caress and bring to life. But he turned away from her and sat next to the beautiful blonde on the bed, who was practically salivating while she looked at him.

“On your knees,” he told the woman.

She dropped without blinking, kneeling in front of him, her face turned up to his. Elena watched in horror as he reached out and caressed the woman’s hair, tugging her to him until her mouth was hovering over him.

Then without speaking, he pulled her down and her lips circled him. Elena felt a tear travel down her cheek as she watched him harden in the woman’s mouth while he groaned, clearly enjoying what she was doing to him.

Elena sniffed back her tears and Dalton looked her way, shooting a glare at her. Elena pushed the visible emotion back, even though she couldn’t stop the trembles wracking her body. He returned his attention back to the whore on her knees.

The next two hours were the worst of Elena’s life, and that was saying a lot considering what she’d been through. But she sat there without saying a word as Dalton touched and caressed another woman, made her cry out and moaned his pleasure as she pleased him.

He looked in Elena’s direction often to make sure she didn’t turn her head, made sure she watched the whole sordid show. Somehow she kept her composure; she didn’t scream, yell, or lash out.

She desperately wanted to attack both of them, and she felt herself tugging against her restraints, struggling in the bounded seat. When it was over, Dalton dismissed the woman as easily as he’d dismissed Elena so many times before. The difference was, the woman turned and gave Elena an almost sympathetic look before she exited the room.

Then Dalton and Elena were left together in the room. He didn’t turn to her, just moved to the bathroom door and slipped inside. She heard the shower running, and she sat still and waited.

Fifteen minutes later, he reappeared, a towel loosely hanging from his solid hips. Not a word was spoken as he undid her bounds and stepped back, staring at her. He hadn’t given Elena permission to get up yet, so she just rubbed her wrists where the bounds had held her as she waited.

When he did finally speak, Elena wished he hadn’t.

“I will do what I please when I please. If you make me unhappy, then you to will be unhappy. Go back to your room and wait for me to call on you.”

He said nothing else as he turned and walked away.

Elena kept herself together until she made it back to her room. She didn’t make a sound as she entered her bathroom and ran the bathwater. Her limbs trembled when she undressed and stepped into the scalding hot water, and when she sank down up to her neck only then did she allow herself to let go.

She cried for thirty minutes straight; gut wrenching, painful sobs were rent from her, but she kept as silent as possible as she let it all out. She sat shaking in the water until it grew tepid, and then she got out, wrapping herself in a robe.

Sinking to the floor she opened the cabinet and ran her hand along the bottom, closing her eyes and wondering if now she could walk away.

She sat there for two hours, not moving, with just her hand pressed against the cool wood of the cabinet. Even after all that time, she wasn’t able to retrieve the necessary items to make her escape possible.

She still wasn’t ready.