Forever (Time for Love Book 1) (11 page)

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Z
ach waited and waited for Rebecca's response. But uncertainty was written on her face.

"Tell me what you want me to do, Bec," he whispered. His brain had shut down and he couldn't think. All he could do was feel. And the overriding emotion was fear.

"Just give me time to think, Zach. I've been through a wild emotional roller coaster ride just these past few days because of you. I just got off that roller coaster, and I don't think I'm ready to get on it again. My heart's a bit too fragile at this point for that."

"But it doesn't have to be a roller coaster anymore, baby," he pleaded. "Things are different now."

"How did things suddenly become different, when just the other night you were set on being just friends?"

Zach raked his hair. Could he tell her that he'd thought she'd become the mistress of a married man and must have been after his money, and had found out that what he thought were facts were totally fiction? No, of course he couldn't tell her that. If anything would make Rebecca run for the hills faster than anything, it would be that he'd believed those things.

"I was just a moron, Bec. I was wrong. I do want you back," he said, getting desperate. Rebecca was doubting his words. And he really couldn't blame her for that.

"You know, Zach," Rebecca said, her eyes watering, "I've waited for months to hear you say that. But being in this ship... it kind of makes everything surreal. We're not in our natural environment. I think that maybe..." she gulped and blinked away her tears. "...I think that maybe this is another short term thing for you. When this trip is finished, you won't feel the same."

"Oh, Bec, that won't happen! Let me prove it to you. Please." He tried to gather her in his arms but she resisted.

She looked at him with sad eyes and shook her head. "I think we should talk about this after we get off this ship—when we're back to our normal lives, doing everyday things—and see how we both feel then. For now, I think what you said the other night was a good suggestion. Let's just be friends."

"Bec—"

"I just can't absorb this right now, Zach. Please."

Lancing pain attacked his heart and it took an effort not to cry. Damn it, they were in a public place, and he was a grown man.

*****

Z
ach focused on work for each minute of the day, only stopping for food and bathroom breaks. From now on, he was intent on finishing his working day by five in the afternoon, every single day while on the ship, so he would have plenty of time for Rebecca. Not that he thought she'd want to spend any time with him, but he wanted to keep his schedule open for her, just in case.

Rebecca wouldn't tell him what her plans were for the day, but she couldn't refuse when Magda asked. Thankfully, his grandmother was open to letting him know what everyone in their party had been planning.

Apparently, Rebecca and Sarah would be having dinner tonight at the restaurant that served burgers. He wouldn't be surprised if Alix would be there with them again. It irked the hell out of him that the man was worming his way into Rebecca's days. Even he didn't get to spend as much time with Rebecca as Alix did. It bothered him that Rebecca and Alix were becoming too close.

He picked up the phone to call his PA, not wanting to dwell on another man wooing his Bec. He'd just get too aggro and wouldn't get anything done.

He'd just finished his lengthy conversation with his PA when Jeff rang. "Hey, bro," he greeted.

"Hey. How's it going so far?" Jeff asked.

"Not bad. I'm glad you rang. There are a few things that you or Greg might need to check," he said, proceeding to give Jeff some instructions.

"No sweat," Jeff said. "Now I want to talk about this message you left me... You want me to not investigate Rebecca's boyfriend anymore?"

"He's not her boyfriend. He's her brother—Trey."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. I don't know who Phillip hired to do the investigating, but they obviously stuffed up on some very important details. I'll deal with them another time."

"How do you know all this?"

"Sarah was telling everyone the other night the story of how Rebecca's brother gifted her that place."

"How do you know that was the truth?" Jeff asked.

Zach sighed in exasperation. "There was no reason for Sarah to lie in front of everyone. I mean it, Jeff. Don't waste your time on this. It's all resolved."

"Have you spoken to Phillip?"

"No. I haven't seen him since day one of the trip. I'm too angry at myself for trusting him with an important job and too angry at him for hiring fucking incompetent people. There's no telling what I'd do if I see his face."

"And what's going on between you and Rebecca now?"

Zach was quiet for a moment. "She doesn't know what we've suspected and I don't ever want her to know. She'd be so hurt. So please don't breathe a word about this to anyone from now on."

"Are you back together?" Jeff pressed.

"No," he said, his heart compressing. "I'm working on it."

"How's Gran?"

"She's well. She's really enjoying herself. This trip is doing her a hell of a lot of good."

"Good. Greg and I can't wait to join you guys."

"My PA's going to board with you. I thought I'd only be here for two weeks, but since Gran wants me to stay until the end of the trip, it's better if she's here. We'll need your PA to coordinate everything on land."

"Sure. By the way, how's Marilyn? Is she enjoying herself?"

Zach laughed. "Every time I see her, she looks so damned bored. I'm sure she's counting the days until you get here."

"She's hot. And fun," Jeff said with a chuckle.

"Anything serious happening there?"

Jeff snorted. "No. It's like your arrangement with Vicky."

"How the hell did you know about that?"

"Don't you know that those two are good friends? Marilyn assures me the both of them won't say a word to anyone else, though."

"But she told you," Zach pointed out.

Jeff sighed. "Honestly, I think she told me so she could rope me into having the same arrangement with her. That was smart, 'cause it worked. Anyway, I have to go. See you soon."

"See yah. And Jeff, remember, no more investigating Bec and her brother."

"Sure, sure."

*****

Z
ach sat in a quiet corner with a view to the entrance of the restaurant where Rebecca was supposed to have dinner. He'd tried to ring her again a few minutes ago. To his relief, she'd answered, but declined his invitation to eat with him. She said she had other plans.

It frustrated him no end, and it made him nervous. He got that Rebecca was still mad at him, and hurting a lot, but how could he prove to her that things were different now if she didn't want to spend some time with him?

His dad had once said that no matter how fortunate someone was, there would always be something he truly wanted that he would never get in his lifetime. For his parents, that had been a daughter.

He'd pondered his father's statement a few times in the past, and Zach had thought he'd been truly blessed that whenever he wanted something, he had the means, ability and brains to get it. But what he'd wanted in the past had always related to business success.

When Rebecca had said she didn't want to have dinner with him tonight, or tomorrow night, he'd wondered if that one thing that he could never have was her. It scared the shit out of him, because right now, where he stood, there was nothing more important than Rebecca. He felt he was going to explode if he had to live every day of his life in regret, knowing that he'd thrown away his opportunity for a future with her.

His heart jumped before sinking like lead to his stomach when he saw four people making their way to the burger place. Yup. There was Rebecca with Sarah, Ron and Alix. Alix appeared to be telling one his extravagant tales again, his arms gesticulating all over the place.

Zach stood up and followed them into the diner. He didn't have any firm plans, except to play it by ear.

The two couples were being seated at a booth when he approached.

"Hey, guys, fancy seeing you here."

"Zach!" Ron exclaimed in a friendly tone, while Rebecca and Sarah looked at him in surprise. Alix had lost his exuberance and was frowning at him.

"You having dinner here, too?" Ron asked conversationally.

"I'm not sure what I'm doing tonight, actually. I just saw you guys walk in and I thought I'd say hi."

An awkward moment ensued when no one said anything in response. Of course, no one would invite a fifth wheel to a double date.

"Well, I'll leave you guys to it," Zach finally said.

"Enjoy your dinner," Ron called out.

Zach chose a table where he could watch Rebecca. At least he could take comfort from the fact that she was sitting next to Sarah, not Alix. That he didn't have to see Alix's face, only the back of his head, was a good thing, too—relatively speaking.

He ordered his food and sat back, glancing forlornly at the group every now and again. He didn't even pretend to be doing anything else. He didn't care if he looked lonely sitting there. The more that Rebecca noticed he was sad about the whole situation, the better. He wasn't acting to gain her sympathy, either. He was just wearing his heart out on his sleeve so she'd believe that he really cared.

If someone in that place recognised him, it would probably seem funny to find the CEO of The Carmichael Corporation sitting in a burger joint looking like a heartbroken teenager pining for a girlfriend someone had stolen from under his nose. And he didn't care.

His food came and he picked at it. How the hell could he get Rebecca to spend some alone time with him? How could he get her to go out on a date? He'd love to take her to the movies, or the theatre, even to one of the trivia contests the ship ran from time to time. And it would be bliss to enjoy some onshore excursions with her in the cities where they'd be docking.

There were still three weeks to go till the end of the cruise, and he'd hate—absolutely hate—for Alix to have opportunities with Rebecca instead of him. It would be so easy for Alix to spend every day with Rebecca on this holiday.

The more he pondered, the more morose he became. Rebecca only wanted to talk after they left the ship. What if something developed between her and Alix between now and then?

"Excuse me," a female voice said, making him look up.

"The place is kind of full," the pretty woman said, "and the only available tables are the big tables for six. I was wondering if you don't mind me sharing your table? I'm supposed to have dinner with my sister, but she's not feeling well."

Zach opened his mouth to decline, not wanting to give Rebecca any reason to think he was flirting with another woman. But he was a gentleman, and the woman wasn't exactly batting her eyelashes at him.

"Sure," he answered, standing up and pulling out a chair for her.

"I'm Nicky, by the way."

"I'm Zach," he answered, shaking her hand as he sat back down. He glanced at Rebecca and found her laughing out loud. No doubt Alix was delivering one of his famous jokes again. It depressed him.

"I don't want to be nosy, but are you okay?" Nicky asked. "Or would you prefer to be alone? I don't mind moving to another table."

"No, no," he said with an apologetic smile. "Sorry. I don't mean to be bad company."

Nicky chuckled. "Well, considering I forced myself on you, you shouldn't be apologising."

He sighed. "Just having a bad day, I guess."

A server came to take Nicky's order and he resolved to at least be companionable. He started a conversation and tried his hardest to pay attention, even though his eyes wouldn't cooperate. They kept on swerving Rebecca's way.

"Um, Zach," Nicky said. "I happen to notice you keep on looking over there. You've got it bad for that girl in yellow, don't you?"

He snickered, hiding his embarrassment. "Am I that obvious?"

"You look so lovesick I feel sorry for you," Nicky teased.

He sighed deeply. "She's my ex. Right now, she's not talking to me, and the guy opposite her wants her for himself."

"Oh, sorry about that. That sucks. Why did you break up, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Because I'm a complete idiot."

"Oh, right. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I think most men are."

"Gee, thanks," he said with a laugh.

"So have you told Miss Yellow over there how sorry you are?"

He felt a painful pinch in his heart. "I have, and she doesn't believe me."

"Oh, Zach. I'm sorry. I'm turning out to be a rather depressing dinner companion, aren't I?"

He smiled. "Hey, don't feel sorry. I haven't exactly talked to anyone about this and it helps."

"Haven't you? See, here's another thing about you men. Why is it so hard for you guys to talk about your feelings?"

Zach continued his conversation with Nicky, grateful for the distraction she provided. The next time he glanced over at Rebecca, the four of them were leaving the restaurant.

And Alix's hand was on the small of Rebecca's back.

He couldn't help but feel that he was already too late.

R
ebecca tried to keep her happy face, but as soon as they walked out and no one was looking directly at her, she dropped her smile.

Some woman had just tried to pick up Zach. And he seemed to be enjoying their conversation.

She suppressed a heavy sigh. She really didn't have the right to feel jealous when she was the one who'd insisted on not taking things further at this time. In fact, that lady could be doing them a favour. It could clarify to Zach his feelings for Rebecca.

But, oh, Rebecca couldn't understand her own self! Was she coming or going?

She just didn't think she could survive it if Zach broke her heart for the third time. She still strongly suspected that what he was feeling for her was simply pent-up lust exacerbated by the romance of being on a luxurious cruise ship. She needed him to be sure that his interest in her would last past this trip before she could feel safe to expose her heart to him again.