Forget Me Never (2 page)

              “I am so sorry,” I frowned. “Here, take my towel and wipe it off.”

              “Thanks,” he said taking the towel and bending over to wipe his foot. The breeze picked up slightly and the aroma of his expensive aftershave seem to permanently embed itself up my nostrils. He wiped his perfect looking feet and stood up holding out the towel to me. “Are you a walking disaster or what?” he asked.

              “Only around you, it seems.” I retorted.

              “Maybe I am your kryptonite.” He smiled slightly, his warm brown eyes seem to dance in the sun.

              “Or I am yours,” I replied.

              “I can live with that,” he nodded and turned to walk away, “My name is Alec Richards, in case you were wondering,” he added.

              “I wasn’t, but it is nice to put a name on my demise,” I smiled.

              “Do you have a name, so I can warn other men away from you, you know, in case you injure them or something?”

              “Grace,” I shrugged.

              “Grace?”

              “Grace Matthews.”

              “Well then, Grace Matthews, it is very nice to meet you and I am sure we will collide again very soon.”

              “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I hope not. I don’t wish to cause you anymore grief.” I smiled again.

              He grinned, “Oh, take all of my excitement away, why don’t you?” He chuckled as he walked towards the other side of the pool and removed his t-shirt. He turned around and behind the shade of my sun glasses, I couldn’t help but look. His body took my breath away. Kevin was a health nut, always training at something, but he could only wish to have a body like that. I think I had to clench my teeth to stop my jaw from dropping open. He smiled slightly before diving into the pool and disappearing beneath the water.

After another hour or so in the sun, I decided to take a dip in the water myself. I untied my sarong and allowed it to drop onto the ground before walking to the edge of the pool. I glanced up and saw Alec sipping from a glass, pausing almost as I prepared to dive in. I pretended not to notice and dived into the cool water, allowing it to wash over me. I swam a couple of lengths of the pool before climbing the ladder to get out. Alec was now sat with his lap top on his toned and tanned thighs, brandishing black Ray Bans so that I couldn’t see him watching me. I almost smiled as I picked up my towel and wrapped it around my waist.

              Okay, I admit it, I was flirting. You’d think after having my fingers burned I would be a bit cautious, but the truth is, I liked that he showed some interest in me. It made me feel like everything Kevin had me believing was wrong and I was worthy of meeting someone else.

              After only one day in America, I was finding myself again and guess what, I actually liked being me for a change. Not the pathetic girlfriend who followed her ex around everywhere he wanted to go. I enjoyed the smiles Alec gave me and he thought I was beautiful, clumsy and his kryptonite, but beautiful none the less.

The extant of my sun bathing became more evident as the afternoon went on. I put on a cool, cotton, dress of light blue, pinned up my hair and decided to go for a drive around the infamous Beverly Hills. When I got to the foyer, the receptionist from the day before grimaced painfully.

              “Miss Matthews, you need to put some after sun on that.”

              “I know, I am going to see it I can buy some, where would you recommend?”

              “There is a Walgreens two blocks down from here. They will be able to help you. It looks so sore.”

              “It isn’t yet, but I am sure it will be.” I smiled. “Thanks for the tip, I’ll see you later.”

Driving down palm tree lined roads seemed so surreal. I had seen it a thousand times of TV and movies, I’d even read about it, but to actually see it, it was amazing. The hot sun shone above and my thermometer in the car read one-oh-one, wow, it was only April.

              I found the drug store and went inside. The aisles were similar to the UK but everything looked so different. As I gazed at the sun lotions, I had no idea which would be the best to by. A young, male sales assistant approached.

              “Let me guess, you need some after sun, right?”

              “How did you know?” I smiled shrugging my deep pink shoulders. He lifted an aerosol can and handed it to me.

              “This stuff is amazing, you spray it on and it numbs the skin. Seriously, it’s the best we have here.”

              “I think I will take two then.” I smiled and lifted another.

              “You really should look after your skin though, ma’am.”

              “I know, but this is the tan I need to show my ex what an idiot he was for leaving me and allowing me to come here alone. So, for me, a little pain now will be so worth it when I see his face in two weeks.”

              “In that case, this stuff will turn your skin golden brown almost overnight.” He beamed.

              “Thank you,” I smiled and walked to the check out.

Somehow I found Venice Beach, don’t ask me how, I didn’t even use the Sat Nav, but I found the beach which in truth was one of the things I missed from my home. I paid five dollars to park my car and climbed out. I pulled a loose cotton shirt over my shoulders and put on my sunglasses as I headed towards the promenade.

              More palm trees edged the white sand and the rustle of waves from the Pacific filled the air with a salty taste. I could see the men training in the infamous Muscle Beach area, but I decided to walk to water’s edge, it was April, and I thought that maybe the ocean would be warm like it was in the Mediterranean, how wrong was I? As soon as my warm toes touched the water, the cold rushed through my body causing goose bumps to cover my skin. I stepped back quickly, no wonder the surfers all wore wet suits, the cold water almost caused me pain.

              I decided to sit on the sand and watch everyone else around me be happy and have fun. These were the times I missed Kevin the most, not because he was a good boyfriend, he never was. Not because we would have beautiful and romantic walks, we never did. No, because when I had no one else, he was someone to talk to and I missed that the most.

              A couple walked by, hand in hand, laughing and talking and it pinched at my heart. How was it that they could find each other and be so deliriously in love and all I found was heart ache? I didn’t begrudge anyone falling in love, most of my friends were now married and settled down, I just didn’t understand why I hadn’t. Was I that bad at being a girlfriend that I didn’t deserve to be loved? Was I as needy as Kevin had told me I was?

Anger filled my heart and my head, I stood quickly and hurried back to my car. I was a fool to believe that I could outrun my pain, eventually everything catches you up and this pain smothered me like a wave.

By the time I arrived back at the hotel my eyes were filling with tears. I ran through the foyer and to the lifts, not looking at anyone or anything. I just wanted to hide. Once in the safety of my room I stripped to my underwear and climbed into bed. Praying for sleep to come and take over my mind. The memories of what we had hurt my soul, everything we did together, from eating dinner to sex, it was playing over and over in my head. It had been almost nine months since I last saw him, nine months since I ran away to London, leaving my life, my family back in Lowestoft, nine months of nothingness.

              When sleep didn’t find me I raided the mini bar in my room. I knew it was going to cost, but I didn’t care. I drank dry bottle after bottle, vodka, whiskey, gin, all of them drained dry. Then I pigged out on the ridiculously sweet candy bars and chocolate until I was physically sick, barely making it to the toilet in time.

Two

As soon as I opened my eyes I remembered my breakdown, partly because I was on the floor of the bathroom in my underwear and partly because my head pounded. Annoyed that I let him get to me again, I lifted my delicate feeling body from the floor and opened my bathroom door. My bed literally called to me, those pillows looked so soft compared to the cold, hard floor I had slept on.

              I crawled between the covers and pulled them over my head, I wanted my head to stop thumping and the pain in my heart to go away forever. The covers being pulled from my body made me jump awake.

              “Oh my God, I am so sorry ma’am.” The maid frowned. “I’ll come back.”

              “What time is it?” I asked.

              “Almost twelve, I’ll leave you to get up.”

              “No, please, I’ll take a shower and get out of your way.” I said hurrying from my bed grabbing the robe from the bed and hurried into the bathroom.

I showered and by the time I got out she was gone leaving a note beside the bed to say she would give my bathroom an extra clean tomorrow. I quickly dressed and hurried down to the restaurant. I needed black coffee, water and some toast to soak up the booze.

My insides churned and swirled as I waited to be shown to a table. I glanced around nervously and saw Alec with his friends eating lunch. He smiled when he saw me and I smiled slightly back at him. The waiter showed me to a small table at the back of the restaurant, away from everybody. I ordered a grilled chicken salad and some fresh bread rolls as all breakfast items were now off the menu.

              “Would you like to join us at our table?” Alec asked at my side.

              I looked up, “I am fine,” I shrugged.

              “I just hate to see you here alone; I promise they will behave.”

              “Honestly, Alec, thank you, but I am not good company today.” I replied and sipped my water.

              “Are you sure, because aside from the fact that you look pretty much radioactive, you are shaking?”

              “I forgot to use my after sun last night and I have a huge hangover.” I answered.

              “I see, right, well the offer is there.” He nodded and turned to leave. “Tell you what, join me for dinner tonight. The boys are going out on the town, but as I have a meeting at nine, so I won’t be joining them. Tonight I will be dining alone unless you put me out of my misery and eat with me.”

              “I wasn’t going to have dinner,” I frowned.

              “I won’t beg, Grace, but the invitation is there if you want to take me upon it, I’ll be here for seven, okay?”

              “Okay, thank you.” He smiled slightly and left me as my lunch was placed in front of me.

I enjoyed the salad which surprised me, I watched as Alec and his friends left and ordered some black coffee. My headache had lifted somewhat and I started to feel better. The thought that Alec wanted to eat dinner with me made me smile. But he was a man and although it may have been innocent on his part and he just felt sorry for me, was I prepared to take that risk?

              I thought about it all throughout the rest of the afternoon. How bad could it be? An innocent dinner with someone who would also be sat alone. It made sense, but made me feel anxious and then there was the whole, what do I wear thing? It wasn’t a date as such, but if I looked too casual, he might have got the idea that I didn’t take anything seriously and on the other hand, if I dressed up and made an effort he might think I was out to impress him, the trouble I had was, I think that is exactly what I was doing.

I decided I had nothing to lose, so dressed in a dark blue chiffon dress that I had worn to my cousin’s wedding the previous year, I slipped my feet into the matching shoes and after pinning up my hair loosely, I added a little make-up. The sales assistant was right about the after sun, it took all of the stinging away, I just had to wait for this amazing golden tan now.

I stood at the door the restaurant and couldn’t see Alec anywhere. Great, so he had stood me up. I turned to leave and came face to face with him. He was dressed in a dark blue suit without a tie and smiled as he literally looked me up and down.

              “Sorry, I was waiting on the couch and didn’t recognize you.” He explained.

              “Oh, so my red arms and face didn’t give me away?”

              “How can I look at the redness of your skin when your beauty takes my breath away?” Thankful for my red cheeks already, I allowed my blush to cover my face. “Shall we sit?”

              “Yes,” I nodded.

              We followed a waiter to a table and he pulled out a chair so that I could sit down. I smiled a thank you and sat. He sat opposite and gazed at me across the table.

              “What would you like to drink?”

              “I think after the level of alcohol I consumed last night, I should just stick to soft drinks tonight.”

              “You don’t come across as the type of girl who would drink excessively.” He remarked.

              “I don’t usually, but yesterday started out bad and only got worse as the day progressed.” I answered as the waiter returned.

              “Can I have two glasses of sparkling water, please?”

              “You can drink,” I frowned.

              “I don’t drink a lot of alcohol, I haven’t in a long while.”

              “Oh,” I smiled lightly, “I assumed that as you were here with a group of lads, that you’d be out drinking in the clubs every night.”

              “Perception is a dangerous thing,” he replied. “The
lads
are only colleagues and we come over to LA once a year for a conference and a few meetings. They may hit the town at sun down, but not me, not really. I’d much rather enjoy a walk on the beach or a drive in the country.”

              “That is refreshing, but also a little weird,” I admitted.

              He smiled bemused, “Why is that weird? I did the club circuit in my late teens, had far too many hangovers and I gain no enjoyment in getting absolutely trashed anymore.”

              The waiter placed a glass of sparkling water with ice and a wedge of lime in front of me. “Thank you.” I muttered.

              “Are you ready to order?” he then asked.

              “I’ll have the tomato and pesto pasta,” Alex said and looked at me.

              “Oh, I’ll try that too,” I stated. I sipped my water and placed the glass back onto the table.

              “Is there any particular reason you got so drunk last night?” Alec asked.

              “Many reasons, but they all boil down to one particular person,” I replied. He glanced at my finger where my engagement ring sat for over six years.

              “An ex-husband?” he frowned.

              I shook my head, “Ex-fiancé.”

              “So, there is no one back in England waiting for you?”

              “No, no one at all,” I frowned. “What about you, is there a Mrs or soon to be Mrs Richards?”

              He sipped his water and shook his head, “No, I have never been married or engaged for that matter.”

              “I was engaged for a long time, big mistake. I swear, next time someone asks me to marry them, I am not having a long engagement again.” I remarked. “But I doubt it will happen again, I had my chance. I think I am doomed to be alone.”

              “Huh,” he scoffed, “knock out like you, that man was an absolute turd not to make you his wife.”

              “I’d like to think that a person wouldn’t just marry girl because of how they looked.” I sighed.

              “Okay, a moronic turd, how does that sound?”

              “Better, I think.”

“Seriously, though, Grace, I find it hard to believe that a man would break your heart, ever. You come across as so sincere and so genuine. I ask you a question and you answer, even if you don’t want to answer because of the pain it causes you, I still get something and that is quite a remarkable quality. Honesty goes a long way in my book.” He smiled.

“Thank you,” I smiled nervously, when he spoke, it was as if he could see right inside of me and it made me feel extremely vulnerable. “My mum has always said that honesty is always the best way to be.” I sipped my water, he gazed into my eyes again, causing my cheeks to warm. “You, um, you said that you are here on business, what do you do?” I asked desperate to change the subject.

              Bemused by my inapt way of changing the subject, he smiled slightly, “I am working in investments at the moment. I work with overseas stockholders and set up international branches for their companies. What about you, what do you do for a living?”

              “I am a graphics designer at GOSH magazine, have you heard of it?”

              “Not really my sort of thing, but it sounds interesting, what is it that you actually do though?” he asked. He seemed genuinely interested.

              “I set the magazine pages up before it runs, I make sure all of the columns fit the pictures and the text is clear and readable.” I explained.

              “So, you also work in London?” he checked.

              I nodded. “Yes, but I am from Suffolk.”

              “I’m from Oxford, I moved to London after Uni and have been there ever since.”

              “It certainly has an appeal, although the rents could be a bit cheaper.”

              He nodded, “Totally agree on that.”

Our food arrived and we ate virtually in silence, I wanted to know more, but didn’t want to seem nosey. We talked lightly about the pasta, it was delicious and the sparkling water went down a treat. I must admit it was nice eating with someone to talk to. He never bought it up again, but I was waiting for more questions about Kevin.

              After our meal he asked if I wanted to join him on the patio. I agreed and followed him outside. A pianist played in the background as we sat while the sun set and the sky darkened around us. The warm breeze cooled my sunburn a little and when a waiter asked us if we would like more drinks. I ordered a glass of white wine, I just felt I was too nervous and possibly a bit up tight.

              “Sounds good, I’ll take a glass too, a Chardonnay,” Alec said to the waiter. “How is that hangover now?” he asked me.

              “Gone,” I smiled. “Would you believe I have only seen this place and Venice beach since I got here?”

              “You need to go to Malibu and promise me you will hit the walk of stars, it’s amazing.” He gleamed.

              “I think it’s safer to stay here, I don’t like driving on roads I don’t know.” I shrugged. “I am meant to be going to Sea World the day after tomorrow.”

              He smiled, “I love Sea World.” He stated as the waiter placed a glass of wine in front of each of us. “Fancy some company when you go?”

              “If you want,” I smiled slightly.

              “I want to,” he nodded and sipped his wine. “Actually, my meeting tomorrow will finish by twelve, I could take you on a tour of LA after lunch. I have been here so many times I could probably do it with my eyes closed.”

              “Are you sure?” I asked and he nodded, “Thank you, that would be brilliant.” I sipped my wine and immediately felt more relaxed.

He asked about my family and I told him about my parents and the fact that I was an only child. He told me of his sister and her family, he boasted about his nieces of twelve and seven still living in Oxford. Of how he broke his leg playing rugby and showed me the scar on his gorgeous shin left by a rugby stud when he was in school.

He asked about my school life, what could I say? I was too shy and I had one friend all through the six years, I did open up about my exams, I was proud of the marks I earned and of how I aced my A-levels and I went on an Internship at a publishing company in Ipswich. I worked there until I was twenty-two and headed back home where I worked at a small office, just so I could be near Kevin, not that I mentioned his name.

Changing the subject again, I asked more of his life and the more he told me, the more I liked. It was as if I was a sponge and soaking up everything he told me. He talked of his many friends in London and how they would meet once a month for dinner. Something I had never done with my friends, we barely met up at all.

After another glass of wine, we decided to call it a night. He had a meeting in the morning and I did not want to be responsible for him yawning all the way through it. He accompanied me to my room and at my door I turned to him,

              “Thank you for a wonderful night.”

              “I should really thank you, Grace, it’s been quite remarkable.”

              “I can’t argue with that,” I agreed with a small smile.

              He grinned and scratched the back of his neck, “So, I’ll knock for you at twelve?”