Forgetting Jane (14 page)

“There are a few variables I’m still waiting on, but they were all buried.”

“Are
you
sure it’s someone local?” Magda asked, getting cups and tea bags.

“I have to follow my gut,” Eli said. He went over to the refrigerator and grabbed a soda.

Magda rubbed at her arms and asked, “What happened upstairs with Jane? This time tell me the truth.”

Eli looked down at the woman he’d known for all of his life and cracked a smile. He knew she wasn’t going to let what happen with Jane go.

“I thought I heard my mother’s voice. Crazy, hah?” He gave a chuckle before wiping away any remnant of pop on his lips.

Magda shook her head and walked up to him. She reached up and gently cupped his cheeks. “I know you miss her very much. She is a part of this house, in every room. That isn’t crazy, Elias.”

“When you hear a dead woman’s voice,
crazy
is the only logical thing I can think of.” Eli rubbed at his face with both hands. He turned away from her touch. “I can’t do this anymore. This job—this town—everything about this place has a hold on me.

“I came here to heal and sell this damn place once and for all. Do you know what I really want?” He flailed his arms out. “Come April, no matter what—I’m gone, Miss Magda. I don’t care about this house anymore. If it doesn’t sell, James can have it. This job, it’s not for me. And I don’t care about who knows my past.” Tears filled to the edge of his lashes and blurred his vision. He cleared his scratchy throat from the strangled hold.

“You can’t mean that,” Magda said. “This place helped you to heal. You’ve been sober for over two years now. As for your job, you are a great leader. People listen to you, Elias. That’s a good thing.” Magda wiped her nose with a tissue she pulled from her sleeve, and then asked, “You want James McAvoy to get this house? You want him to win? Your mother is probably turning in her grave right now.”

“If he wants it, he can have it. Why am I holding onto this place so tightly when all there is, is bad memories?” Eli shook his head and strode out of the room.

J
ane woke with the warmth of the sun on her face. The heat felt good, and safe. But the serenity vanished and the brightness turned grey and cold. A scent of whiskey spiked the air. The heavy stench made her gag.

A shadow of a man, distorted and dark, hovered over her. Jane let out a gasp. Shouts filled her ears—she tried to move but was pinned still. She couldn’t focus on the words, but she understood “Bitch” loud and clear.

With all her might, Jane used her arms and fists, and punched out toward the man. She shot up from the couch, ready to defend herself.

Between the gaps of her arms, she saw no one standing in front of her but the late afternoon sun shining in.

She lowered her arms and rubbed at her eyes to remove the filmy haze.

“Damn it,” she said under her breath. Jane scouted the room once more making sure she was alone. Was it a ghost—a dream? It sure didn’t feel that way. Maybe a past memory—she hoped not. A dizzying rush hit her system. She wanted to lie back down to steady herself. Then it dawned on her that she was in the living room. How did she get downstairs?                            

Jane eased herself up, still woozy from what happened, and headed into the kitchen. She found Magda reading the paper and sipping tea.

“Can I have some?”

Magda looked up from the Herald and smiled. “Sit. How are you feeling?” She grabbed a mug from the cupboard, dropped a chamomile teabag in the cup and placed the cup in front of Jane. Steam rose as Magda poured the water into the cup.

“I guess okay. How did I get downstairs?”

“Don’t you remember?” Magda placed the cup in front of Jane and sat down. “Elias brought you down.”

“Last thing I remember was looking out the window when the Chief arrived. I came downstairs to apologize. Right after the Ass said what he said, I went back to my room. I sat on the bed and I think I heard crying again, then nothing.” Jane shrugged her shoulders and stared down at the scratched up oak table. “That’s it, I’m going crazy.” She took the cup of hot tea in her hands, blew into the cup and sipped it with caution.

Magda gave a slight laugh. “No crazier than Elias. Honey, you need to stop calling him Ass. For one, it isn’t polite and two, he is doing the best he can.”

Jane looked up from her cup. She knew the nurse was right. “I know—but sometimes I can’t help it. He drives me nuts. I feel like I’m his prisoner.”

“He is only trying to protect you. I know he can be a bit brash, but he is trying.”

“Why does he ignore me when I ask about the case?”

“Maybe there’s nothing to tell, I don’t know. But I do know he’s trying his best. You should go talk to him, he’s upstairs.” She finished her cup and got up. “Now I know you’re feeling better, I have some stuff to sort out down in the basement. If you need me, just call out.”

The nurse was right. Jane took another sip of her tea, which calmed her raw nerves. She thought of what Magda said. There were kinder ways to get information. Calling him ass wasn’t one of them.                           

Jane stood up and pushed the kitchen chair in. “I can handle this, like adults.” She grinned. “And I won’t call him Ass,” she uttered that shallow oath.

She took the stairs at a slow cumbersome pace. With each step, her bruised hips clicked with soreness. Not quite a hundred percent yet, Jane thought as she rubbed her legs.

Jane reached the top and was about to knock on his bedroom door when the door swung wide open. Her breath hitched. Eli stood in the doorway with only a towel around his waist. Trickles of water slid down his bare chest.

Jane’s imagination didn’t need to go far. Under all that grunge hid a gorgeous man. Clean shaven face and a well-sculpted body. Her eyes trailed upward from the curve of his waist to his broad shoulders that carried his height quite well. She took quick mental notes of his perfect V form. His abs ripped into a nice tight six. Eli’s slicked- back hair, darkened from the water hid the blond streaks, that gave him the surfer persona.

“Are you enjoying the view?” Eli frowned.

“Oh, um. Sorry. You caught me off guard.”
Holy crap
. Her heart tripped. For some reason she couldn’t take her eyes off of him. A burn ignited in her cheeks and abdomen. The sudden spark of lust made her shudder a little. She wasn’t sure what to say next. Almost breathless.

“What do you need?” Eli was curt.

Even with his rudeness, she thought him gorgeous. Her eyes wavered back to the edge of his towel, which sat loosely around his hips. He stood there, with his boxers in his hand staring at her. The aroma of his soap wafted up, numbing her senses. But Jane wasn’t going to be deterred. “Got a minute? I want to talk to you.” She had to look away or she’d lose her dignity and kiss him.

“How do you feel?” His question came out more like a caress. Eli acted as though standing almost naked in front of a woman was an everyday occurrence. He wasn’t affected by his lack of clothing the way she was.

Her cheeks bloomed even more crimson as she focused on the hallway floor. “Can you put something on? Please.” Her mouth went dry. She had a sudden thirst for wet skin.

“I’m not naked,” he said nonchalantly. “What do you want?”                           

Jane kept her head forward. “Please,” she stressed. Then tried to change her focus from Eli’s nakedness. “Cleaning isn’t your strong suit.”

“Is that what you came up here to tell me?”

“No, but just glancing at your room. You lack organization. Or is it cleanliness?”

“Being a slob is one of my good traits—now tell me what you want to say.” Out of the corner of her eye, Eli stood there, not dressed. Heat grew in her stomach—lower. “Please get dressed.”

“Okay. Come in while I throw some shorts on.” Jane heard him laugh.

If it weren’t for his coarse behavior, she could actually like the man. “You are not funny.”

Don’t look.
Too late. She tilted her head slightly toward his direction and caught him dropping his towel.
Ooh.
Everything about his body was simply beautiful.
What a gorgeous ass.
He left the door wide open for her viewing pleasure. Would he do that on purpose? Her chest hurt from her frantic heartbeats. She couldn’t catch a full breath.

What the hell is wrong with me? A peeping Jane?

Sense and reason flooded back. A shift of coldness in the hallway brought her out of her fascination with his backside. Jane leaned in and partially closed the door, leaning her head forward and focusing on the other end of the hall.

The aroma of mildewy decay filled the hallway. Slight fear trickled in her, but she stood there with her feet fixed to the floor. A mild burn branded the back of her head, but nothing she couldn’t handle.

Jane cringed at the ice-cold touch. Bile rose fast, burning all the way up until she bent over and threw up.

Her mind filled with such cruelty, then it went blank. It shifted again, changing into dark melded colors. Jane looked around and saw only dirty walls. Words etched in red appeared before her: blood, rape and death. The color bled down to a cement floor. Chains clanked and the smell of decay suffocated her. Was that her past or her future?

Jane crumbled into a heap.

E
li slipped on his shorts, turned and noticed the door partially closed. As he opened it, Jane dropped to the floor.

“Not again. Magda,” he shouted. He rushed to her side and picked her up. He carried her inside his bedroom, kicking his clothes out of his way, and placed her on his bed.

He adjusted the pillow under her head and covered her with the blue crocheted blanket.

“Jane, wake up.” He touched her cheeks lightly. She didn’t move.             

Magda hurried in. “What happened this time?”

“I don’t know what happened. I was changing, I turned around and there she was on the floor. What the hell is wrong with her?”

Magda checked Jane’s pulse. “All her vitals are good. Maybe we should take her back to the hospital, Elias.”

“No. Let her rest for right now. If she doesn’t wake up, then we take her back.”

“All right.”

Eli stepped out of his room and swiped the moisture off the wall with his fingers. It clung to his skin, then evaporated. He walked back in and dumped the clothes off the rocking chair next to the bed and sat down. “We need to keep a close eye on her. Jane can’t be left alone.”

“Apparently,” Magda said without hesitation. Her eyes creased in the corners with worry.

“I’ll watch over her right now,” he said as he rocked back and forth.

Magda nodded, looked over at Jane once more before she headed back downstairs.

“Damn,” Eli hissed. He hated seeing Jane that way. And the way she was crumpled in a heap on the floor—she reminded him of when he found her in the hospital bathroom. His gut gnarled up like mangled barbed wire. He felt completely helpless, like when he was a child. Truth was that she reminded him of his mother more and more. Wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.

His temples pounded as he watched her lay motionless in his bed. Eli hated the way she made him remember things from his past. It didn’t matter where he was in the house. Whenever she was around, he was reminded how much he hated the memories of what this house held. He couldn’t be near her.

He needed something to drown out the pain. A bottle of jack would do it, but Magda took care of that. On the very first day he arrived home, she threw out all the old liquor his mother had hidden in the house. She went as far as to tell the grocer not to sell it to him. How he had despised her for the months of hell she put him through.

Eli leaned back against the rocker and blew out a slow breath.

He looked over at Jane.
At least one of us will sleep.
Eli got up from the chair and sat on the edge of the bed. As he drew the blanket up to her chest, his eyes memorized her face. She had a simple beauty. Her eyelids harbored a thick forest of long lashes, which shaped her slightly almond eyes. Jane’s lips were smooth and full. He wanted to trace his thumb along her bottom lip, but didn’t. But he wondered what they tasted like.

Her pert nose carried a little bit of freckles across the bridge. He hadn’t noticed them before with all the bruising. They gave her a carefree impish look, but she was far from playful. Jane’s skin seemed smooth as velvet.

He pulled the blanket to her shoulders, hoping it would ease his sudden need to kiss her, but the urge became greater. Being near her made him want to break the rules.

Eli took a gulp of air and pulled the blanket to her chin. That didn’t help.

He was so close, bare inches from her luscious lips.
What am I doing? Get your head out of your ass and think.
Eli eased back. He had to rein in his sudden desire.

He released the blanket, which accidently covered Jane’s face, and woke her up.

Jane sat up, slightly glassy eyed and confused. She looked around the room then back at him. “Wait…” She sounded even more confused.

“You fainted again.” He didn’t mean to sound mad, but it came out that way. His irritation was more for himself than Jane.

“Oh, okay,” she said. Jane rubbed her eyes and looked around the room again. “So…this is what your cave looks like.”

“Really?” Eli stepped behind the chair for more needed distance and extended his arms out. “You want to talk about my room?” he asked with a laugh.

Jane’s mouth quirked tight to one side and shrugged her shoulders.

Silence between them lasted a few seconds. Eli asked, “Why did you faint?”

Jane let out a soft exhale before she answered. “I don’t remember.” She got off the bed and stood there, arms folded and tapping her foot.

He stepped around the chair and faced her. “What do you mean, you don’t remember?”

“That’s exactly what I mean.” Jane let out a huff and continued. “Every time you want an explanation, and I can’t give you the answer, you get all pissy. I’m sick and tired of your shitty attitude, Chief. I’m the victim, remember? You’ve had me cooped up in this house for over a week. I can’t deal with this, and you anymore. I want to go back to the hospital. At least there, I have other people to talk to. And, don’t ever kiss me again.”

His anger spiked with hers. “Don’t you worry about me kissing you—and what does my attitude have to do with you fainting? All I asked is if you remembered why you fainted. And you can’t.”

“That’s my point. You act as though all this is my fault. I can’t give the answers to why. I. Don’t. Remember,” she yelled right in his face. “That’s the truth.”

“How do you expect me to act? One second you want to talk, then next thing, you are out cold on the floor. This is twice, Jane. Both times you’ve given me a fucking heart attack. Damn this case, it’s going to drive me to drink again.” He let it slip. The pain returned in his stomach, it rose to his chest in a flood, drowning him.

Jane shot forward. Her feet got snared in the clothes on the floor and she almost fell face first onto the hardwood.

“Easy.” Eli caught her around her waist. He didn’t want to let her go. Her breath quickened as he tightened his hold, pulling her closer to his body. “I got you.”

Eli could feel her breath on his neck. It tickled. Their eyes met at the same time—their lips were centimeters apart. He wanted to close the gap, but his morality tripped up his desire to taste her.

Instead, he sat Jane down on the edge of the bed. He squatted down in front of her, adding some distance. “I’m sorry for shouting.” He shook his head slightly. “I have no right to talk to or treat you that way. I know I have issues, which it doesn’t involved you. But you are passing out, and
that
worries me.”

Jane nodded. “I can’t help what’s happening to me, Elias. Don’t know why I’m passing out. I get a bit of flashes here and there but it’s not clear and complete. Not sure if I’m remembering something or if they’re just dreams.”

Eli reach up and wiped the heavy tears rolling down her cheeks. Maybe he shouldn’t have touched her but he couldn’t help himself. He sat next to her, their arms touching, but neither moved.

“Jane, I don’t know why you keep passing out. But no matter what, it’s going to be okay.” Eli nudged her.

Jane leaned her head onto his shoulder. “I feel like I’m going crazy, Elias.”

His breath caught his throat from her personal gesture. And he liked the way she called him by his name. The way she said it made him thrum with every beat of his sore heart. Eli gave in to his desire and touched her. He wrapped one arm around her and gave a gentle squeeze. “I’m here to protect you.”             

“Even from me?” Her face tilted up, her lips wet from her tongue. Eli had to rein in his impulse to kiss her. He cleared his throat and got up to give himself some distance.                           

“Even from you,” he chuckled.

“I am sorry for looking out the window.”

“What happened earlier?”

Jane’s face was blank. “What do you mean?”

“I came up to talk earlier.” The word “apologize” stuck like a spur in his mouth. But it seemed like that was all he was doing. “I opened the door to your room and you sat on the bed, pale as a ghost. Your… your voice changed.”

Jane bit at her lower lip before she spoke. “Who was the woman that lived here?”

“Why?” He felt that familiar pang in his chest.

“She has long, almost brown hair. She’s a little shorter than me and very, very thin. She looked like she had been beaten pretty badly. She told me to beware of James? Why would he get mad if I’m here, Elias?”

“Whoa.” He grabbed her arms tight and yanked her up to stand. “Where did this come from and how do you know about James?”

“Please let go of me, you’re hurting my arms.” Jane tried to pull away but her strength couldn’t match his.

He tightened his grip. “What game are you playing, Jane?” His face was a mere inch from hers.

“Elias, let me go!” Jane shouted. She shook with fear.

He realized what he was doing and released her immediately. Jane bolted to the other side of the bed, her back plastered to the wall.

“The only women in this house are you and Magda. And how did you find out about James?”

“I didn’t say she still lives here. I said she did. And she told me about him.”

“No more lies, Jane,” Eli growled.

“You think I’m lying to you?” she shouted, tears filling her eyes. 

He knew he was frightening her and eased back. “I don’t believe you,” he said through his teeth.

“I am telling you the truth, you stubborn jackass. That woman told me to beware of this man. Who’s James?” The conviction in her voice faded when he stepped closer to her.

“I don’t know who you are talking about, but this better not be another bullshit ghost story you’ve made up.”

“You thought I made up the story about the girl?” She shifted toward the door.

“I went along with the idea for your benefit. But not here. Not in my home. I want the truth.”

“I’m done with this crap. I can’t deal with you anymore. I want to go back to the hospital.” She tried to get to the door but Eli moved much faster and blocked it with his body. She tried pushing him out of the way but he wouldn’t budge.

“You can’t go back. That son of a bitch is still out there. I will not let you leave.” He reached out for her but she moved away. He dropped his hand. “I want the truth, Jane.”

“I am telling you the truth.” Her voice cracked in a low whisper.

His anger cleared. Eli saw the redness on her arms he caused. He walked past her with his shoulders slumped. “I’m so sorry.”

“That’s all you can say?” Jane’s tears coated her cheek. She wiped them off with her hands.

Eli wanted to gather her in his arms but instead, walked to the chair and collapsed in it. He covered his face. “I am sorry for grabbing you that way. But that seems like that’s all I’m doing. I don’t want to be like my father.”