Four Friends (28 page)

For Andy, the summer was shaping up differently than ever before. She usually planned a long visit with her father in San Luis Obsipo, but this summer she had hedged on such plans. She had such a nice routine with Bob. He had cut back on his evening work most nights so he could be with her, and she loved that he would do that. Almost every weekend they toured model homes and open houses. Bob was always looking for new ideas and Andy loved looking at houses, something she never indulged alone, since she wasn’t in the market to buy. In her entire life, she’d never had a man interested in the same things until now. They went out to dinner at least once a week, sharing each other’s favorite places, holding hands across the table. There were a couple of TV shows he liked and sitting beside him to watch them, rubbing Beau’s belly with her bare feet, was more pleasurable than a trip to the islands. Bob was a big reader, about an hour or two every night, and the book he was working through always stayed on the table that was on what had become his side of the bed. And he spent the night often—three or four nights a week.

Noel had done as instructed—he came to dinner. He was still on the quiet side, maybe not entirely sure his mother was playing with a full deck, taken with this man who, even Andy could admit, was far different from the men she was usually attracted to. Maybe Noel wasn’t as enchanted by Bob, although Andy thought Bob came off well—his usual affable and interesting self. Or maybe Noel was slightly embarrassed by his last encounter with Bob, which was simply rude. In any case, it wasn’t a bad dinner. But it sure didn’t reel Noel in. He left right after they ate.

Andy was already feeling the impulse. She wanted Bob all to herself. She wanted his overalls hanging across from her clothes in the closet, his shoes by the door. She hadn’t breathed a word to anyone because she’d always been accused of
needing
a man, of moving too fast. In her private thoughts, she knew there was a kernel of truth in that. But this was different. She was feeling a strong need for
Bob.
Her plan was to gut it out until a respectable period of time had passed before asking him if he and Beau would consider a change of residence.

They returned from a Saturday evening at a local bistro and the message light was blinking on her home phone. “What’s this?” she asked herself.

She put the phone on speaker and dialed in the code while Bob let Beau outside. Her ex-husband Rick’s voice, panicked and angry, came blistering into the room. “Andy! You’re not answering your cell! Call me the second you get home! We have a problem! Hurry up!” And right after that, a second, a third and a fourth similar command. She pulled her cell out of her purse and saw there were messages and texts and her ringer had been off.

“Oh, God,” she muttered. “Noel. Noel.” It was simply the only thing she and Rick had in common.

Bob looked at her from the back door. He had a look of concern on his face, a very rare expression for him. “Call,” he said.

Feeling afraid, feeling vulnerable, she left the phone on speaker when she called Rick. He came on the line all worked up. “Do you have any idea what’s going on with your son?” he demanded loudly, sounding enraged.

“I talked to him twice today,” she said. “I see him at least twice a week if not more. What—”

“He’s
gay,
that’s what! Your son is
gay!
”

“What?” she said. “What did you say?”

“He’s
gay,
I said!”

“Did he tell you he was gay?” she asked, in a state of shock.

“Of course not! I went to that apartment where he likes to hang out and it’s full of faggots. Fairies! And your son is right at home there!”

“Rick, he works a lot in theater arts—he has a lot of gay friends....”

“I confronted him!” he blustered. “He admits it! Said he was afraid to tell me.” He laughed meanly. “Smart kid. He should’ve been afraid!”

“Wait,” she said. “Wait a minute. You went there? Why?”

“I wanted to see what he was up to, what he was hiding. I’m not paying child support and college tuition if he’s using drugs and that’s what I thought was going on. He sure wasn’t coming around here much. I wish it had been drugs, but it’s not. He’s a fag!” He coughed in disgust. “Obviously
you
had no idea where he was....”

“Of course, I knew where he was—I checked it out, saw that it was in a good complex, asked the apartment manager if she’d had any trouble there because my son liked to hang around there with friends. She said those boys were good boys. But Jesus, I didn’t barge in. I wouldn’t do that!”

“I blame this on you!” he stormed. “You and your weird boyfriends!”

“Wait a minute,” she replied angrily. “If it’s true, it has nothing to do with my boyfriends. They were all incredibly straight.”

“Yeah, right. I always thought that Bryce guy was a little light in his loafers.”

“Oh, bite me, Rick. How about you? Leaving him with a mother and no father for at least a couple of years while you ran off with the school nurse!” She put her hand up to her mouth. “Oh, God, what am I saying? If Noel is gay, it doesn’t have anything to do with either of us. You can’t
make
a person gay!”

“Yeah? Well, he sure didn’t get it from
me!
”

“How do you know?” she asked. “If he is gay he was born gay!”

“Not possible! No way!”

“Yeah, that would be a tough pill to swallow, wouldn’t it? Because all I have are all these big, hetero Greeks in my ancestry.”

“Yeah, Greeks—they started this, right?”

“Oh, for God’s sake! Don’t you have a couple of gay uncles you’ve crossed off your Christmas card list? Get a grip! He didn’t do this to you! Whatever is going on with Noel, it’s not about
you!
”

“I’m through with him,” Rick said. “He’s all yours. I’ll be damned if I’ll have some queer around my kids!”

“Oh, you didn’t do that,” Andy said. “Please, Rick—you didn’t do that to him!”

“When he straightens out, he’s welcome back. Till then, I’m not going to have his influence around the boys!”

“Rick, what have you done? If he’s confused or scared you could’ve done terrible damage. For God’s sake, Rick! If you’re angry with me, don’t take it out on Noel. He’s just trying to grow up.”

“Trying to grow up a fag! I’m not having him in my house! I’m not paying any more support while he’s in college. I’m through with that!” He disconnected.

Andy just looked at the phone for a long time, numb. Shocked.

“That was awful,” Bob said.

She looked at him. “What am I going to do?” she asked.

“You should call Noel. Tell him you heard from his father and you’re sorry his father’s so angry and worked up. And he should come talk to you because you’re not going to act crazy like that. But you’d like to know what’s going on with him and you want to know he’s all right.”

She stepped toward him. “Did you know?”

“Know?”

“Did you know my son was gay? Did you get that vibe from him?”

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “Why would I? Because my wife was a lesbian? He seemed like just your average, regular kid to me. Listen, there aren’t always a lot of signals. I’m proof of that, right?”

“I wasn’t missing anything, was I?”

“Andy, what were you going to do if you were? Deprogram him? Come on, you know we don’t control this part of life. I mean, mothers are incredibly influential, but really, you don’t have that kind of power.”

“Do you have any gay kids in your family?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I might have a gay nephew back in Connecticut, but if he is, he hasn’t come out. Why? What does that have to do with anything?”

“Are you comfortable around gay men?”

He shrugged. “Gee, they’re so good with color...”

“This isn’t funny!”

“It’s also not a catastrophe, Andy. You don’t really think your son got to thinking, Gee, let’s see what I can do to make my life more difficult, more challenging. It’s not an easy life, even around here. I mean, look what the boy just went through with his dad. Noel had to know that wasn’t going to be easy. Cut the kid a break. We’re all pretty much stuck with who we are.”

She shook her head. “Why aren’t you a father?” she asked softly.

“I got to the real thing too late in life,” he said with a smile. “Call him. Tell him it’s okay to come home. Tell him you’re not upset. He’ll be glad to get that message.”

* * *

Gerri answered her front door and found Andy standing there, clutching a coffee mug in one hand and her cell phone in the other. It was very clear from her reddened eyes that she’d been crying. “Is your house a little on the quiet side?” Andy asked.

“Oh, God, what is it? Is it Bob?” Gerri asked, reaching out and pulling her inside.

“No, no. It’s Noel. Please, could we talk? Do you have a lot of people around?”

“Just the opposite. Phil didn’t come by tonight, he has a big case. Jessie’s babysitting, Matt and one of his friends are playing video games in his room and Jed has a phone growing out of his ear. What’s the matter?”

“Oh, you’re not going to believe it. Or maybe you will, I don’t know.”

“Come on,” she said. “Deck.”

Gerri lit a couple of patio candles and through some tears, Andy explained the events of two nights earlier, the horrible phone conversation with Rick. “Now Noel won’t return my calls or come over,” Andy said. “I know Rick must have really upset him, but I’ve left messages asking him to please talk to me, let me see that he’s okay, and I’ve promised I’m not going to react the way his father did. Oh, Gerri, he’s scaring me to death. I’m going to have to go over there, to that apartment his friends have. I just don’t want to make things worse.”

“You don’t think he’d do anything...desperate?” Gerri asked.

“I’m starting to wonder. I’m starting to fear it. The only thing that’s stopped me from chasing him down is that I assume he’s where he wants to be. That he’s getting some sympathy and support or something. But why in the world would he be afraid of me?”

“Maybe he’s not afraid of you. Maybe he’s just totally upset about Rick. What an asshole—what was he thinking? Was it just the shock? Is that what happened?”

“I doubt it. I mean, I’m sure Rick was stunned, but it’s also the way he is. It never once crossed my mind that we’d face something like this with our son and unleash that monster inside Rick. Oh, God,” she said, tears spilling over. “I just can’t imagine what Noel’s going through.”

The patio door opened noisily and Jed leaned outside. “Mom, I’m headed over to—” He stopped suddenly when he spied Andy wiping off her cheeks with a hand. “Oh-oh,” he said, retreating, pulling the door closed.

“Jed,” Andy called.

The door swung open slowly and he stood there, his eyes wide and his posture tense.
Now what?
was written all over his face.

“Jed, Noel’s in trouble,” Andy said, standing.

He inhaled sharply, stiffened and waited nervously.

“Jed, I just found out Noel is gay,” Andy said, stepping tentatively toward him.

He let out his breath in a whoosh of relief. “Oh, that,” he said, taking a stabilizing breath. “I thought maybe he mouthed off to the judge or something. But I did tell him to keep his stupid mouth shut or he’d get like years of community service. You know, he doesn’t always think.”

“Jed, I said he was gay,” Andy tried again.

“Yeah, I know.”

“You
know?
” Andy said, taking another small step.

“Well, he’s like my best friend, you know. Even if we don’t...well, I think we might have different drummers.” Then he grinned. “I think his might be a majorette.”

“This isn’t funny,” Andy said.

Jed shrugged. “Guess I’ve gotten used to it. Hey, don’t blow a gasket. You’ll get used to it.”

“You’re not... I mean, you’re not upset? Your best friend? Gay?”

“Yeah, well I admit it kind of freaked me out at first. But I mean, come on—it’s just Noel.” Then he smiled and put his hands in his front pockets. “I don’t think he’s attracted to me or anything.”

Andy backed up a step, sank into her chair and wept into her hands.

“Hey, sorry,” Jed said, coming out on the deck. “I won’t make jokes, okay? But just so you know, Noel doesn’t get all pissed off about that. I think he secretly likes the jokes. Makes him feel like I’m playing on his team.” Then he put up his hands, palms toward the women. “But, hey, I am not playing on that team, all right? I mean, I am totally straight, okay? So don’t—”

Gerri was having trouble keeping a straight face.
Good old Jed,
she thought—so down to earth sometimes. If Andy hadn’t been bawling her eyes out, she might’ve cracked a smile. But what she said was serious. “Jed, Noel’s dad found out. After he humiliated him with every gay slur on the books, he told him never to show his face around him or his family again. At least not until he’s straight.”

“Man,” Jed said, making a fist and striking the air with it. “He was afraid of that. Hey, no offense, Andy, but Rick thinks he’s so fuckin’ cool and, man, he’s just retro. A real ass clown. Totally out of the loop. I don’t know what his
deal
is!”

Andy looked up from her hands. “No offense taken,” she sniffed. “Those are the kindest things you could say about that jackass.” Then the tears came again. “Poor Noel.”

“Don’t worry too much. He totally expected it,” Jed said.

Andy picked up her phone, displaying it to Jed. “He won’t talk to me. Won’t return my calls. I left messages saying I wasn’t angry or upset or anything, but he won’t even... I’m so worried. I don’t know what to do.”

“He’s probably just stoned,” Jed said with a shrug. “By the way, I think he does too much of that.”

“I don’t care. I just want to hear his voice. It’s been
two
days!
”

Jed shook his head and rolled his eyes. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and punched in a few numbers, backing away from the women a couple of steps. Then he said, “Hey, dick wad, you stoned again? Well, call your mother. She’s over at my house crying because you won’t call her. You got ten minutes, then I come over there and haul your scrawny ass home, you copy?” He listened for a moment. “Yeah, so? You’re bummed. But you’re not surprised, right? And you got it over with. So call your mother. You have nine minutes. Jeez, what are you thinking? You can’t drop a bomb like that and then disappear! These women—they think you hung yourself in the shower or something! Call her!” Then he clicked off without saying goodbye. “He’ll call,” Jed said. “Or I’ll go get him. Stupid shit. He should know better than to freak everyone out.”