Four Letters (The Lust List: Devon Stone #3) (11 page)

While we got one problem out of the way, one more still exists—Lex. Well, one and a half, if I’m being honest.

“I can’t help but feel like it’s my fault you’re out of a job,” I tell Maddie.

She’s hanging out with me while I nervously wait for Devon and Lex to come back from an errand. Really, that’s all the information I got. “We’re running an errand.” And then they left.

“It’s no big deal. I liked working at Brecken’s, but it’s bartending. It’s not like there’s a shortage of bars around here.”

Still, I can tell she’s not happy. “Do you want to talk about anything? You seem down.”

Maddie switches from her couch to the one I’m sitting on and leans her head on my shoulder. “I feel like you’ve come a really long way in the past few weeks. I’m sure Devon’s a part of that reason, but I’m so proud of you for finding your confidence and staying true to yourself. You have so much greatness ahead of you.”

“Thank you.” The compliments are nice, but… “What’s wrong?”

“In, like, a month, you’ve made all these self-discoveries and you’ve grown and things are looking better for you by the day. Meanwhile, what do I have? I feel like my life is stagnant. My job was destroyed. My love life is nonexistent. I don’t even know who I am or who I want to be.”

We sit in silence for a moment while I think of the right words to say. “I couldn’t be who I am without you. You’re the greatest friend anyone could ask for. You encouraged me. Believed in me. And you saw things in me and Devon that we couldn’t see. I know things are rough right now, but I’m certain it will get better for you. You know? This time next year, who knows where our lives will be. If I’ve learned anything, so much can change in such a short time.”

She laughs. “For real. One day, you’re afraid to leave the apartment. The next, you’re tackling stalkers on the red carpet.”

I feel my cheeks warm. I
cannot
believe it came down to that. This morning, we all laughed at the
ScandalLust
headlines:

“Never Mind Who She’s Wearing On the Red Carpet, Who’s She Whacking?”

“What’s With The Fists of Fury, Devon’s Girly?”

“Olivia Margot Has Lost Her Mind—And in Those Shoes?”

“How did this become my life?” Haven’t I always said I wanted things simple? And what did I get? A Devon Stone.

We both jump as the front door opens. In walk Devon and Lex, their arms filled with bags from boutiques and expensive department stores.

My jaw drops. This day just got instantly stranger.

“Did you two go shopping?” Maddie asks. “And you didn’t bring us?”

Devon grins, then turns to Lex. “Why don’t you get ready in Olivia’s room.”

She nods, and they disappear to my room. A minute later, Devon comes back out, his arms empty. He sits down across from us, resting his arms on his knees as though he’s about to give us a pep talk.

“We’re going for a ride today.” He’s looking at me, his face intent and serious. Then he lowers his voice even more. “There’s a place a couple hours up the coast. Luz Del Sol. It’s a ninety-day rehab facility. I convinced Lex it’s time for her to check-in. We made a deal. If she can clean herself up, I’ll help her get settled here. Help her find a job, a place to stay. But she has to complete the program.”

“Good,” I say, trying to hold back a massive grin. I wasn’t sure how he’d act after yesterday’s ordeal. He had sounded so set on ditching her, but she’d helped us—no matter how awfully she did it. She’d been there when she didn’t need to be. Now it’s our turn. “So she’s packing? You guys went shopping to get her stuff?”

Devon leans back and relaxes a little. “Yeah. I mean, she’s a Stone—sort of. She needs to look the part and since she came here with nothing…But the real reason I took her, I figured it would make it easier for her to handle the severity of the compromise. This treatment facility, it’s a really good one. You only get one shot though. You voluntarily check yourself in, but then they control you. You don’t get to come and go. You don’t get visitors. Your phone calls and mail are monitored. If anyone can treat her, it’s them, but once they approve her for check-out, she’s on her own. It’s up to her to stay clean. And if she doesn’t, if she screws up and needs help again, they won’t take her back. I needed her to understand that before she agreed to it.”

Wow. It’s obvious this is important to him. He wants to see her succeed, and it makes sense. She’s the last piece he has of his mother. Through Lex, Devon will find his own closure. Since he never got the chance to be there for his mom—to try and help her clean up—it’s like he’s determined to do so with his sister.

I move over to his couch and lean into him, my head resting on his chest. “You’re a good person. What you’re doing for her…it’s the greatest gift she’ll ever receive.”

Devon kisses the top of my head. “Let’s just hope she takes it seriously.”

It takes all afternoon to finish getting Lex ready and to make the drive up. The ride in Devon’s Camaro is mostly silent. Lex, in the backseat, seems understandably nervous. Will she go through with it? I’ll make sure we encourage her as much as we can, but, she’s only just become a part of our lives. How much do our opinions matter?

She’s an adult. She’ll figure it out for herself. We all have to be given room to grow. And when the right people support you, the options are limitless. Hopefully, she’ll recognize that too, and when I see her in a few months, she’ll be a new, better version of herself.

When we pull up to Luz Del Sol, I’m blown away by its beauty. I’m not sure what I would’ve expected from a rehabilitation facility, but this place…this place looks like a luxury resort. It’s surrounded by trees, and being near the coast, there’s a steady breeze bringing everything to life.

We get out of the car and stand near the trunk. It’s quiet out, only the sounds of rustling leaves and birds to escort you to the wooden doors of the facility.

Should I hug Lex? Tell her how proud I am of her? Will it make a difference?

She’s quiet, but I sense something in her—hope, determination?

Oh what the hell? I wrap my arms around her, pulling her into a hug. “You’re going to do great.” I pull back and see she looks equally surprised and grateful. “I know we’re not exactly friends, but I’m here for you, okay?”

Lex nods. “I hope we’re friends in ninety days. I like you.”

I smile and look to Devon. He should give her a hug or something. Come on, big brother.

He fidgets with the keys in his hand like he’s thinking of what to say. I’m sure Lex just wants to hear any words of encouragement—no matter how silly they may sound.

“Well, this is it. You ready?” he asks her.

“If I say no, are we driving all the way back down?”

“Nope.” Devon puts his arm around her shoulders and squeezes. “It’s now or never.”

“Then
now
it is.”

Devon turns and opens his trunk, pulling out Lex’s brand new designer suitcase. He sets it down next to her and she takes the handle.

My heart thumps quickly with excitement. No matter how challenging the next couple months will be, I’m happy for the promise of her future—a much brighter one than her mother’s.

Then Devon reaches into his trunk and pulls out a second bag, his duffel. He slams the trunk shut and turns to me, not quite looking me in the eye. My throat catches.

“What’s going on?” I ask. No, I plead. What did I miss?

“I’m checking in too.” He drops the duffel bag on the ground by his feet and takes my hands in his. “You know why.”

My hands tremble, my stomach feels hollow. It’s hard to breathe. “Why—why are you telling me this now? You can’t just drop this news and leave me like this.”

He smiles his sexy half grin, his icy blue eyes on me. I can’t stop the tears that blur my vision. I don’t know whether to feel thankful that he’s finally getting help too—after all these years of addiction—or hurt that he kept this plan from me.

“You’ll be fine,” he says. “
We’ll
be fine.”

Will we? Our relationship is so new. What happens when we don’t see each other for months? As he gets better, will he still have the same feelings for me? What if he changes his mind? Or worse, what if the rehab doesn’t work? What happens then?

There are too many what ifs. Too much uncertainty.

Devon wraps me in his arms and kisses me softly. “I know it scares you. That’s why I didn’t give you more time to worry. But I promise, everything will be okay.”

“How can you be so sure?” My voice quivers, and I feel panic enveloping me.

“Because I have you. And you have me. And I’ll do whatever it takes to hold onto the girl I’ve fallen in love with.”

All the panic dissipates with his words. He’s the one who makes me feel whole, who makes me feel
normal
. Can we make it through this? We
have
to.

Devon kisses me one last time and places his keys in my hand. The keys to his beloved car. The car he doesn’t let anyone drive.

“Take care of it. Please.” He smiles and I return the same happy, hopeful expression. “I’ll see you in ninety days.”

And with that, they walk toward the entrance to Luz Del Sol. I hug my arms and breathe in deeply, gathering my own strength while I watch them disappear. Devon and Lex. Brother and sister. Supporting each other in a way Jared and I never got to.

With only the sounds of nature surrounding me now, I look up at the bright blue sky. Everything’s uncertain. But there’s so much promise. Devon, Lex, Maddie, even myself.

We’re all going to emerge from the darkness.

The rumble of Devon’s Camaro sends birds scattering as I pull up to Luz Del Sol on this exciting Friday afternoon. Those who know me understand I can sometimes be an anxious mess. But even those closest to me would be shocked by this level of nervousness.

I haven’t seen Devon in ninety days. Some might laugh. After all, plenty of people manage long-distance relationships all over the world. But still, it’s been difficult, and in ninety days, life feels so much different than it did three months ago when I left Devon and Lex here. We’ve gotten to talk, thankfully, but our conversations have been supervised. It’s not like we’ve gotten to divulge private thoughts or engage in phone sex. Instead, we’d talk about day-to-day topics: the weather, my new job, updates on Stone label artists. We sent each other mail, little love letters that reminded me of being a teenager again. I have all four of his letters tucked in an old memory box I keep in my closet. But even those had to be written knowing someone besides him and I would be reading them. I guess they were afraid people outside the facility would try to ruin all the progress that’s been made or that those in rehab would try to reach out to their drug dealers. I don’t know. All I know is each conversation and letter felt charged with trapped electricity, and today…today I get to see him again.

I can’t ignore the subtle disappointment that Lex isn’t coming home with us, but according to Devon, she’s doing better. She just needs a little more time.

Waiting in the car, I fidget with my phone.
ScandalLust
has had fun creating rumors about us.

“Devon and Olivia No More? Did OliVon Fizzle Out Already?”

“Olivia Margot Heartbroken—Devon’s Been Seeing Four Other Women!”

“Olivia Who? Devon’s Former Girlfriend Returns to ‘Nobody Status’”

And I don’t bother to correct it. These assumptions have allowed us both a certain degree of privacy. No one in the media knows Devon’s here, and I’m no longer harassed by pirate-impersonating paparazzi. That’ll change soon enough when we’re seen together, and then the rumors will change.

This’ll be our life. And I’m completely happy with that.

From the corner of my eye, there’s movement, and I snap my head up in time to see the door of the facility open. Devon walks out, his bag slung over his shoulder.

Forget trying to keep it all together, I let the tears ruin my makeup as I jump out of the car and run straight into his arms. He wraps me into a hug and then pulls my face up to kiss me. His lips, soft and sweet, graze mine until he crushes into me, kissing me with force. My breath catches, and a familiar tingle runs down my spine. My body on fire, I tangle my fingers in his hair and hold tight to him.

When we break free, I stumble over all the words I want to say. “I’m so happy to…You’re out…How are you feeling…How’s Lex…Do you—”

“I love you.” He stares down at me, and I feel my knees go weak.

A laugh escapes me. Here I am, an emotional, nervous wreck. And here’s Devon, sure, confident, and very much to the point.

“I love you too.”

He kisses me again, this time lifting me off the ground. Then he leans in close to my ear. I breathe in the scent of him as he whispers, “Let’s get the hell out of here.”

I hand over his keys and we walk back to the car hand-in-hand. He holds the passenger door for me, then goes around to his side, tossing his bag onto the backseat. He settles into the driver’s seat and leans forward, planting a big kiss on his steering wheel. “I’ve missed you too,” he tells his car.

Ninety days worth of what ifs fly out the window as I look at Devon, how happy he seems, and accept that this beautiful life is all mine.